I Love You
by: Lauren
June 1998
I Love You
I don't know who's the bigger idiot, him for not telling me how he really feels, or me for walking away from him. I mean, how long have I lusted after him? How long have I been in love with him? I didn't see him for five years, and when I finally get the chance to make him mine, I turn away cause he's too damn proud to admit he has feelings! I'm better than that! I shouldn't have pushed him! And now Heero Yuy, you haunt my dreams, and I wake in the morning frustrated, sweaty, and alone.
I must be crazy now
Maybe I dream too much
But when I think of you
I long to feel your touch
How can I get him back? How can I tell him that I want to spend the rest of my life in his arms; I want to hear him say he loves me; I want him to touch and play with my hair; I want him? I've got to get him back. I can't stand to be alone anymore.
To whisper in your ear
Words that are old as time
Words only you would hear
If only you were mine
As I drive to his apartment, I think of how long I've waited for this moment. I remember the first time I looked into those devastatingly cool blue eyes. The eyes I drowned in. The eyes I fell in love with. And to believe I shot at him; I must have been crazy. Well, I know I'm crazy, but that was on level with Heero's suicidal tendencies! Oh… how it hurt when I thought he'd died. That's when I knew it. That's when I knew I loved him. Who wouldn't fall in love with someone like him? He was everything I admired and had the strength I desired to attain. They say no one is perfect. They never met Heero. He is perfection.
I wish I could go back to the very first day I saw you
Should have made my move when you looked in my eyes
Cause by now I know you'd feel the way that I do
And I'd whisper these words as you lie here by my side
I love you
Please say you love me too
Theses three words could change our lives forever
And I promise that we will always be together
Till the end of time
I pull up into his driveway and walk slowly to his door. I'm more nervous than I've ever been in my life. I can deal with flying into death's waiting arms, but I can't tell Heero how I feel. I must be crazy. But what if he doesn't accept my offer of love? What if he really doesn't love and want me? I don't think I could deal with the heartbreak of leaving him again. I stand on his doorstep immobile, hand poised ready to knock, but not moving.
So today I finally find the courage deep inside
Just to walk right up to your door
But my body can't move when I finally get to it
Just like a thousand times before
As I finally resolve to knock, the door opens and I face a startled Heero. He looks at me puzzled, then with sad longing in his eyes. It looks as if he was on his way to the post office; he's holding a letter. Wordlessly, he hands me the letter, and I see that it is addressed to me. What is this? I open it, and we stand in silence as I read.
"Duo,
Aiishiteru. I hope you can forgive my pride. Please come back to me.
Forever yours,
Heero Yuy"
Tears fall soundlessly from my eyes. His hand reaches up to gently brush them away. He gathers me in his arms and holds me. I pull back a little, and he looks into my eyes questioningly. I sigh and my lips move to his. Our first kiss. So soft…
And without a word he handed me this letter
Read I hope this finds the way into your heart
It said… I love you
Please say you love me too
These three words
They could change our lives forever
And I promise that we will always be together
Till the end of time…
We go inside to talk.
" Why Heero? Why did you wait so long to tell me?" I ask
" You know why… I just couldn't. At first it was the war, then my… my… pride…" he stutters as he tries to hold back tears.
" Oh Heero… I… I love you… Please don't run from me anymore."
He smiles slightly.
"Ninmu ryoukai."
Well maybe I… I need a little love
And maybe I need a little care
And maybe I, maybe you, maybe you,
Oh you need somebody just to hold you
If you do just reach out
And I'll be there
His smile lights up my life. This has been to long in coming. We have wasted so much time we could have been spending together. All because of our own weaknesses and stubborn pride. I pull him into my arms and hold him close and stroke his hair. It's so soft…
I love you
Please say you love me too
These three words
They could change our lives forever
And I promise that we will always be together
Till the end of time…
" Heero… I love you… I love you… with all of my heart…"
He lifts his head from my shoulder and smiles as a tear roles down his cheek.
" I know… I know… I love you too…"
And he kisses me. This kiss seals our pact, our oath, and our promise to spend the rest of our lives together. To love each other until we die.
Together, together forever
Till the end of time
I love you
I'll be your light
Shining bright
Shining through your eyes
My baby…