By Ketheres Elyion

Hikari Horaki wandered through the streets near what used to be her home. Nothing was left now; just large, mostly collapsed piles of carbonized rubble. When the Angel had attacked, she had been in one of the many shelter areas with one of her sisters. Since it had been midday, Mizumi had returned home on her lunch-break to pick up the meal she had forgot that morning. While she was there, the alarms sounded and the city prepared for an attack that would be the last of its kind.

Mizumi and Hikari had been forced to travel completely out of the city to find a shelter with space for them - a fact that was their saving grace. The two sisters had been sitting in a corner, sharing the prepared meal when the room seemed to have been shaken like a rattle - Sa's rattle. In the mass of hysterical people, Hikari was barely able to escape the slowly collapsing shelter out into the open. When she stepped through the heavy armored doorway, it was like stepping through the gates of hell itself.

The entire city had been consumed in a tremendous holocaust. Vegetation on the outskirts of town had been ripped from the earth or stripped of its foliage. No windows facing towards the city remained intact. Broken water mains flooded the streets, creating a steaming morass of mud and glass slivers. Broken gas mains belched flames like angered demons. And in the center of the city, the King of Hell stood surveying the destruction.

Unit 01 stood amidst the towering flames, its glowing gaze making a review of the devastation before it. The EVA itself was ablaze, the material covering the EVA underneath the armor plates having been ignited in the pyroclast. The plates themselves dripped molten metal into the churning cauldron its feet. The drops mixed with the slag of melted metal and construction materials that had seconds before been the proud fortress city of Tokyo-3. The city that had been destroyed by one of its protectors.

Hikari had learned later what had happened that day, that Rei had risked her life to destroy the Angel and protect Shinji. She had interpreted the information from the insane ravings of Asuka, who had stayed with her and her sister at a friend's house outside the city. She was devastated by her failure as a pilot and disappeared during the night without ever saying anything more. Hikari was worried about her friend, but she was also worried about her sister. The eldest of the Horaki daughters had died in the destruction of Tokyo-3. Mizumi was completely destroyed by guilt. The two older sisters had a lunch date that day. Had Mizumi remembered her lunch, she would have been with her sister when she died. Hikari tried to help her by reminding her that if they had both died, then she would be left alone with no one but their aunt. But it didn't help, Mizumi remained despondent.

As ashamed as she was to think it, Hikari was happy to be back in Tokyo-3. Her sister had stayed behind with their aunt in Hakone, so she was here by herself. She had come to help an old friend, or rather two old friends. Major Katsuragi had contacted her with regards to her pet and roommate, Pen-Pen. The woman had felt that it would be better if the penguin was moved to a safer location with someone who could be trusted with his welfare. Hikari had happily agreed, hoping that the bird's avian antics would provide a source of light-heartedness her family was in great need of.

The girl had wandered past the Suzahara residence, or what was left of it. She knew that Toji was safe in the hospital, although she missed him very much. He had been moved from his original location and no one would tell her where he was now. But it was a solace to her to know that regardless of where he was, he was at least safe. Even though the idea of safety was easily dispelled by viewing the destruction of the city, it was an illusion that she held on to because she had nothing else.

"All right Hikari, enough wandering around," she said aloud to herself. She spoke to hear anything at all in the silent city. There was no one else in the streets. "Time to go get Pen-Pen."

She began to head for the apartment complex where Misato lived. It was going to be quite a walk. The train depot had been on the far side of the city, so she had spent most of the morning walking around the perimeter of the lake that now composed the center of the city. She had covered a lot of ground, but there was still a good distance to go, and she still had the return trip. She was debating on how to get back to the train station when she suddenly realized that she was not alone.

Walking parallel with her, one street over, was a boy. The distance made it somewhat difficult to distinguish features, but she could tell that the boy was wearing school clothes. She could also tell that he was looking at her. Not liking the situation, she hurried her pace, hoping that he was just someone who had legitimate business being here. Her suspicions of the boy were raised when she saw at the next block intersection that he had kept pace with her. She decided to wait until the buildings were between them to raise her speed again.

Hikari was unnerved by what she saw at the next intersection. The boy had kept perfect time with her, even though there was no way that he could have judged what speed she had been going. She raised her speed once more, now moving at a brisk trot - anymore and she would be running. Several nervous thoughts flitted across her mind as to who this boy was and what his intentions were. She was so deep in her paranoid ponderings that she forgot that the two streets merged at the next intersection. Before she realized what had happened, she was walking five feet away from the boy, who had once again managed to keep in step with her perfectly.

She stole several nervous sideways glances at him. She kept her same speed, too afraid of what could happen if she changed it. Her breath suddenly caught in her throat as the boy called out to her.

Boy: You certainly do walk fast.

(Unsure of what to do, Hikari answered as quickly as possible. Her words were in as much a hurry to leave her mouth as she was to leave the boy behind.)

Hikari: Huh? Yeah, sure. Got somewhere to be.

Boy: Where would that be?

Hikari: Going to see a friend.

Boy: A friend is a good thing to have. Especially in times like these.

Hikari (thinking): You've got that right. I wish Miss Katsuragi was here right now.

(Suddenly it dawned on her.)

Hikari: Yes it is. I'm going to see a friend of mine. A major in the NERV organization.

(She put as much emphasis on 'major' as the word could hold. She hoped the name-dropping would scare away her pursuer.)

Boy: Oh, good. I need to meet someone from NERV.

(At this, Hikari almost stopped from her bewilderment. She kept her pace though, not wanting the distance from the boy to lessen any. She was, however, curious as to this boy's statement.)

Hikari: Why would you need to meet anybody from NERV?

Boy: I need to know where I need to go.

Hikari: Huh?

Boy: I have to report for duty.

(Hikari stopped dead in her tracks. The boy, simultaneously, came to a complete stop also. She turned to face him and was thrown off by his appearance. The boy looked like a doll, white and thin with matching hair. He reminded her of Rei. The semblance was odd enough, but what he had said was even more bothersome.)

Hikari: What duty?

Boy: Piloting an Evangelion.

(Hikari nearly fell back at the statement. It was said so casually, like someone saying that they were going out for the evening. He apparently had no idea what he was getting himself into.)

Hikari: You're a pilot?

Boy: Yes. I am the Fifth Child, Kaoru Nagisa.

Hikari: Fifth?

Kaoru: Yes. I just arrived today. I've been trying to find where I can go to get to NERV.

(Hikari decided to call the boy's bluff.)

Hikari: Well my friend could help you. We're only a couple of blocks from her house.

Kaoru: May I accompany you then?

(The girl was unnerved by the offer. She had hoped that he would be frightened off if he was a phony. Apparently he wasn't. Reluctantly she saw that she couldn't really do anything to stop him if he did want to follow her.)

Hikari: Fine.

(The pair walked in silence for a few moments. Hikari had been bluffing herself when she said that Misato's apartment was a couple of blocks away. In reality it was still at least a mile off. She was mulling over exactly what this boy was up to when he stopped the song he had been humming and turned towards her.)

Kaoru: Can you tell me about them?

Hikari: Who?

Kaoru: The others like us. The Children.

Hikari: I know them, but I'm not one of them.

(Kaoru arched his left eyebrow. The puzzled look was not lost on the girl; at least she thought she understood his confusion.)

Hikari: They're classmates of mine. That's how I know them. They come to school just like other kids.

Kaoru: But what about you?

Hikari (surprised): Who me? I could never be a pilot.

Kaoru: Why not?

Hikari: I don't have what it takes to be a pilot. Besides, I think there's some sort of selection process isn't there?

Kaoru: Some sort, yes. But the Chosen Children would not be with any others but their own.

Hikari: What are you getting at?

Kaoru: I would say that you are a Child, even though you have been officially declared as such.

Hikari: But I don't understand. Why wouldn't they put more of us into action? Maybe if they had, none of this would have happened.

(Hikari gestured to the destroyed city.)

Kaoru: Those in power always hold secrets from those under them. It is the only way that power can be held.

Hikari: That would explain what happened to Toji.

Kaoru: Who?

Hikari: Toji. He's my...

(Hikari stopped herself, unsure of what to say - more for her own sake than Kaoru's.)

Hikari: ...friend. He was suddenly picked as a pilot a couple of months ago.

Kaoru: Why suddenly?

Hikari: I don't know. One day he just didn't show up for school. It was only later that I found out that they had made him pilot an EVA.

Kaoru: You seem upset. Aren't you happy that your friend is helping to ensure your life?

Hikari: That's just it. In his first mission, he nearly died. He never let me see his wounds, even in the hospital he kept the covers over him all the time- he's kind of proud - but I had heard that they were severe. That he had lost his leg because of them.

Kaoru: ...

Hikari: I don't mean to scare you. I'm sure you'll do fine. Just follow Shinji and Rei's lead.

Kaoru: Who?

Hikari: They're the pilots who are left.

Kaoru: Left?

Hikari: Yes. After Toji got hurt in his EVA, one of the other pilots was hurt too. She's a friend of mine. Asuka is her name.

Kaoru: Asuka. Hmm...

(Hikari suddenly felt the need to change the subject. Mentioning Asuka's name had brought up the image of what the Second Child had looked like when she last saw her. She didn't want to remember how the only thing that the once lively girl had talked about was her imminent death. Hikari changed the subject, but not by much.)

Hikari: If you ever meet her, don't make her mad or you're going to regret it.

Kaoru: I'll try to remember that. How is she?

Hikari: How is she what?

Kaoru: You said she had been hurt. Has she recovered?

Hikari: No...

(She couldn't understand why she was talking about everything with this boy. He was like a blank slate. She'd write something on him, and he would just wait for something else - an elaboration on what was said - and let her confront her own words. But despite the discomfort, it was nice to talk to someone about everything bothering her.)

Hikari: The Angel that hurt her damaged her mind. She's depressed and I'm afraid suicidal.

(Kaoru recalled the pathetic creature he had met earlier that day. He knew who she was. He knew who all of the important players in this game were. But it was only cold hard facts. He was slowly realizing that there was far more to these people than he had been told.)

Kaoru: I'm sure she'll be fine.

Hikari: I hope so.

Kaoru: Tell me about the others.

Hikari: Well I don't know Rei all that well. She never talks or smiles, just reads or stares off into space. She's also the only albino I've ever met... present company excepted.

Kaoru: It would be nice to meet someone like myself. What about the last one?

Hikari: Shinji? He's nice enough, just shy. He seems to like Asuka, as far as I can tell. And she likes him. But they would never admit to it.

Kaoru: Why not?

Hikari: Well you don't just blurt out that you like someone, it doesn't turn out that good for you if you do. You have to have a little tact about it.

Kaoru: But if you don't admit your feelings, they'll never admit theirs.

Hikari: You don't have to have a confessional. If you like them and act on it, and they like you, then they'll act on it too. Well, sort of.

Kaoru: It would be much better just to be honest with how you feel.

Hikari: No it wouldn't.

Kaoru: Why not?

Hikari: Because you don't wear your heart on your sleeve unless you want your wrist to get slapped when you reach out.

Kaoru: Do you love him?

Hikari: What!?

Kaoru: We're no longer talking in generalities. I'm asking about you and your friend.

Hikari (trying to sound superior): I don't think it's any of your business.

Kaoru: Then why bring it up?

Hikari: Because you asked!

Kaoru: No I didn't. Now do you love him?

Hikari (defensive): What if I do?

Kaoru: You should tell him.

Hikari: Why? He probably knows already.

Kaoru: How could he if you haven't said anything?

Hikari: Like I said before, you just sort of act nice to them and see if they act nice back.

Kaoru: Anyone can act. You should tell him if you want to be truthful. Or do you prefer your life to be a mass of innuendo with nothing solid to it?

Hikari: What if he doesn't say it back?

Kaoru: Are your feelings so shallow that they require something in return?

Hikari: I'm not shallow!

Kaoru: Self-centered then.

Hikari: I'm not that either!

Kaoru: If you don't admit your feelings, you're lying to yourself. If you admit them with the aim of having similar feelings being returned to you, you are only interested in what you feel. If you truly love, you will freely admit it.

Hikari: It's nice that you can quote self help books, but this is the real world. Things don't work that way.

Kaoru: They will if you make them.

(Hikari sighed, exasperated at the conversation. It wasn't that Kaoru was completely off base, it was that he was dead on. And that's what was bothering her. She decided that it was time to turn the tables on him.)

Hikari: How about you? You ever fall for anybody?

Kaoru: Not yet. I probably never will.

(The boy had almost sounded sad when he spoke. Even the smile that he continually wore had faded slightly.)

Hikari: Why not?

Kaoru: I can't just love one person. That would be biased.

Hikari: You can't love everyone.

Kaoru: I can't? Why not?

Hikari: It's just not humanly possible.

(Kaoru smiled at the mention of the word 'human'.)

Kaoru: So who should I love then?

Hikari: Whoever you fall for. I never really decided that I liked Toji. It just dawned on me one day that I liked him. And all of a sudden I realized all of the good things about him.

Kaoru: So love is an accident then?

Hikari: No. But it's not something you can make yourself do. It happens to you, you don't make it happen.

Kaoru: So you're telling me that one day I will just meet someone that will make me give up everything else just for that person?

Hikari: Well, yea, I guess I am.

Kaoru: Interesting idea.

Hikari: Maybe, but it's true. And since you seem to have this thing for truth, you should probably accept it.

Kaoru: Perhaps I should...

(Hikari suddenly realized that they were at Misato's apartment complex. She headed for the elevator. Kaoru lagged behind.)

Hikari: Well are you coming? I thought you wanted to meet someone from NERV.

(Kaoru debated the statement. What reason was there to delay? This wasn't the reason he had to come here. He needed to get on with his duty.)

Kaoru: Coming.

(The two waited out the elevator ride in patience, the speaker producing a badly remixed Sinatra song in classic muzak style. After getting off, Hikari led the way to Misato's door where she found a note on the door.)

Hikari (reading note): "'Hikari, had to be at work. Pen-Pen is all packed and ready to go. Left the door unlocked for you. Thanks again, Misato Katsuragi.'" Shoot! We missed her.

Kaoru: Is that a fact? Too bad.

(Hikari picked up on a sigh of relief from Kaoru. It was probably her fault, telling him about all of the bad things that had happened to the other pilots. Who would blame him for not wanting to report in now? Hikari entered the apartment. Kaoru remained at the door.)

Hikari: Are you coming in?

Kaoru: I don't wish to intrude...

Hikari: Don't worry, I know Misato wouldn't mind. Maybe Shinji is here.

(Kaoru was too interested in the prospect of meeting another one of the pilots in person to stay behind. He entered the apartment and walked into the kitchen where Hikari was collecting some packed luggage with a penguin dancing about at her feet.)

Kaoru: Interesting. A warm water penguin. I've never seen a live one before.

Hikari: Huh? What are you talking about?

Kaoru: Warm water penguins a supposed to be endangered, nearly extinct. The only ones left in the world are supposed to be in a research facility in Germany.

Hikari: Well Misato used to work in Germany. Maybe that's where he's from. I'm not sure if anyone's home, sometimes Shinji is kind of absent minded. His room is back that way.

Kaoru began to walk down the hall but stopped in front of a lopsided picture hung on the wall. The picture had a number of people in it. A number of children - Hikari included - and a couple of adults were grouped around a visibly drunk woman who was wearing a banner announcing a victory of some kind. Hikari passed him, going down the hall into one of the rooms. She lingered inside for a moment, before crossing the hall and checking one of the other rooms. She walked back towards Kaoru, now carrying a couple of CD cases in hand.

Hikari: I thought that I'd get my CDs back from Asuka while I'm here. Sorry, but Shinji's not home now.

Kaoru: That's OK. Who are these people in this picture?

Hikari (pointing): Well that's Misato. That's Asuka and me. That's Kaji and Dr. Akagi. And those are the Three Stooges - that one's Shinji.

Kaoru: What's that?

(The boy pointed to a barely visible patch of blue hair hiding behind Misato.)

Hikari: That's Rei. She's not one for parties, but Misato ordered her to be there, so of course she came.

(Kaoru hesitated for a moment, as if he could draw anymore out of the picture by looking at it longer. Hikari interrupted his trance.)

Hikari: Listen, I've got to head back to the train station and it's a long walk, so I need to start back now.

Kaoru: Of course.

(After returning to the street, Hikari started to head back towards town in the direction of the train depot. Kaoru started to head in another direction.)

Hikari: Hey, where are you going?

Kaoru: I thought I'd try to find some other way to NERV.

Hikari: Oh.

As strange as it had been, it had been nice to talk to someone her age. She had been stuck with her older sister and aunt for the last couple of days and wouldn't have been able to stand much more. She was somewhat upset at the idea of walking back alone. But, as much as she'd like company, something in Kaoru's demeanor had changed and he seemed to be in a hurry to get to NERV now.

Hikari: Well good luck as a pilot. If they rebuild the city I guess I'll be back.

Kaoru (already walking away): Yes, I guess so. Goodbye.

Hikari wandered down the road, trying to negotiate the littered streets with Pen-Pen's bags around her shoulders and Pen-Pen around her feet.

Karou headed away from the lake, taking a route in the opposite direction of Hikari's. Along the way he talked with himself, trying to work out what is happening.

"I don't understand this. Do they not know what is going to happen to them? Am I something that no one has prepared themselves for? Am I the thief in the night? Why are they like this? Surely it could not have been all the fault of my brethren. Some of this must have been there to begin with. It can't all be a creation centered around the plan of the Old Man."

Kaoru found no comfort forthcoming, regardless of how he thinks of the situation. Regardless of how he viewed it, he still couldn't answer the most important question in his mind.

"Why should it matter to me one way or the other?"

Sa's rattle - Sa is an African god of death, and (paradoxically enough) the creator god for the mythology in which he appears. The reference to his rattle is another way of saying "death rattle," which is appropriate considering the amount of destruction caused to the city during the Sixteenth Angel battle.

The elevator music... "Fly me to the moon..."

Thief in the night - This is a Biblical reference. I can't recall the passage number, but it goes something like "behold, I come as a thief in the night, without warning." It refers to the Second Coming and the Judgement, which ties in with the (somewhat) common idea that Kaoru is a Christ-like figure.

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