The Missing Link?----ah zhong
(The below article can be found in the Official Bedside 40 website)
Two Songs???
Two Songs!!!
Man, this was the latest piece of bad news that struck us like a brick thrown from a 12-storey HDB flat when we reached the place (NTU) for our jam band competition. The day was already going bad enough, with Ji not having use of his ever-trusty car (we had to take a cab driven by a terribly weird taxi-driver: COST=$20) and also, the place where the audition was held (I believe its called the Nanyang House or some other crap name), was in a terrible state of renovation, with lion dancers banging their drums away on the road (at first, we thought they were there to welcome us, and thus, waved at them. We only discovered later that they were just practising there).
God (NOTE: I am not a Christian)! This was really bad news, since we have only prepared one song for the audition, and it was already too late to add another to our "vast" arsenal of songs. We wonder whether heaven was really working against this group of immensely talented (at mahjong that is) and intensely humble group of musicians.
All this was seriously affecting our morale….
We read the notice that was given to us once again and confirmed that we needed to perform two songs for the audition….moreover, the judging criteria for the audition was to go by the following 4 categories….
1) Vocals (25 marks, thank god I wasn't singing)
2) Showmanship (30 marks, what the hell were we supposed to do? Slam our guitars? Or show off some of the flying kicks that once made Eric Cantona famous? Man, we are here to play, not to be some clowns)
3) Professionalism (30 marks, so are we suppose to say, "thank you judges" in 100 different languages?)
4) Instrumentation (15 marks, I couldn't believe that the most important thing for a jam band was actually given the least marks!)
Anyway, there wasn't much we could do, and so, I took a look at the other jam bands around (our competitors) and discovered a few bands featuring some skimpily dressed girls as their lead singers (you know what category they will score! HINT: the judges are all GUYS), and also, most of them had very expensive equipment (I looked at my rusting bass guitar and promised myself that I will polish it more often next time). I was intimidated, but what the heck, it was the playing that counts rite?
Well, our turn to perform finally came right after a group of posers, who had fans gathered outside to cheer them on (I suspected that they bribed them). We went in, plugged in, played, and that was when the mother of all troubles began….
Man, we played like four monkeys who were holding musical instruments in their hands for the first time (i.e. we suck). I was so nervous that my left hand was shaking and I missed a few slides on the guitar. I looked around and could see others having the same problems, and it was right there and then that I wished I had a tortoise shell (no, not to hide, but to throw at the judge and audiences there so that I can run far far away)
The song ended, and I could actually see that the judges and audiences looking at us in shock (I prefer to say that they were in awe). This was followed by weak applause that sounded like bird droppings hitting the windscreen of a car. Man, we quickly unplugged and made our way out, that is, after telling one of the bear-like judges that we only had one song….
So what went wrong?
Not enough practise?
Not enough confidence?
Or maybe it's because we don't have the natural talent since we don't come from any musically inclined family (the fact that my father sings regularly in his bath doesn't count)?
The whole incident set my rusty brain thinking and after almost 3 whole days of thinking, I finally realised what was wrong….
We needed skimpily dressed girl/s to join our group….
Bedside 40 is currently reorganising and planning for their next big audition/gig by having more late night mahjong sessions