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Run 1583, 24^rd May. Hares: Bolt-1-On assisted by Simply Fred at Hambalang

Stats: 29 Members , 1 New Member , 1 Visitor , 1 Past Member = Total 32

The run of the year! (according to Bolt-1-On). Shit of a run according to the Hash Master. Two things will be remembered about this run. The late return to the beer truck for most runners and the crop damage which occurred.

 The hares, being ambitious bastards, decided to lay two runs described as medium and long but actually extra long and long as the runners on the long run arrived before those on the medium run! The run started disappointingly in this beautiful area with the trail dropping down over waste ground into an area of crops. The trail crossed a valley and it soon became apparent to all but Hardcase that this was a leftie. The first few hundred metres had a number of checks that scattered the pack across a wide expanse of singkong and heading up the hill. The hares were heard to be shouting "go right" so it was obvious at this stage it was not going to be a good run. The trail headed out and then curved left up hill. Those that know Hambalang will now that it is all uphill! The keen Hashers kept on paper until at 5.45 they found the point at which the trail split – rather late in the day don’t you think? The scribe never reached this point having seen the pack heading up and in the far distance. The wise option was taken of heading back to the beer truck to join several other wise persons (Jonesy, Magic Dragon, Hardcase, to name but a few) and of course the Hares.

 The run comments were varied from derogatory to downright disgust. Fanny thought it was a shit of a run and expressed concern about the amount of crop bashing. Concorde found a discarded can of paint which Bolt-1-On claimed was to mark the trail as they had run out of paper. Condemned from his own mouth – the hares ran out of paper! No wonder it was a shit of a run. Tarzan gave us the benefit of his advice as PRO by castigating Herb for not arranging for the beer truck to be allowed in to the Estate. Dr Jerker was really pissed about the amount of crop bashing contributing to the famine in Indonesia. In his words he was "fucking dis’custard". Pigeon Shit was also not happy about the run as he arrived back after 7.00 and was speechless. It is lucky Witless was not present as we could have had a Witless Takes Revenge drama after Bolt-1-Ons attack on Witless after a certain point-to-point at Indocement which will remain unforgettable.

 Hardcase thought it a shit of a run but then he couldn’t find paper. Superbrat was complimentary about the skill of the hares at splitting the run after 45 minutes and at making the medium run longer than the long run. Fucking Wendy thought that the crop bashing was a sin and that running out of paper is automatically a HashShit. Angie suffered from altitude sickness and thought the run in along the road was shit. The HM declared it a shit of a run

 The Circle

Well, it started late when enough people had returned to make it worthwhile. Numbers swelled when at 6.40 a group of runners arrived including Cheeseballs, Sheepskin, Colonel Bloodknock, Surya, John Kembuan, Herpes, Dr. Jerker. A few minutes later Elephant Man and Maandi arrived.

 Sheepskin was able to take command and spread DDs liberally for anyone for anything. The hares were given a preliminary drink as a taste of things to come! Scotsmen were rewarded for their achievement, whatever that was – Hardcase, Anguish, The Rope and Tarzan (?). Herpes was rewarded for his nightmare of a run and Dr Jerker, Concorde and Magic Dragon also drunk to that. A DD for last week,s virgin Scribe, Elephant Man who was congratulated by Magic Dragon for his fine literary work. Surprisingly Yoshi and Anguish were given DDs for leading the HM back – why, we ask?

 The last runners, Fanny and Pigeon Shit came in at 7.05. Pigeon Shit was not happy!

 Awards were given this week to Magic Dragon for Song of the Year (last year) "My, My, My Viagra", to Scribe, yours truly, for alst year’s efforts, to Simply Fred for 50 runs and to Next Week for 100 runs. DDs flowed aplenty the most notable being to Maandi for looking remarkably like Bambang on a magazine cover and to Simply Fred as Prick of the Week for still believing it was a good run. He continued to maintain this all through the makan at the Hambalang restaurant – I know cause I sat next to him.

 The Hares sang in Dutch or some European language, maybe double Dutch. Pigeon Shit sang one bad and one good song but at least he tried. Do come back soon. Crusty Nuts as Has Music did get some singing going with some old favourites – "Sing us Another One Do-oo". There was a round of Jokes mostly unprintable and the circle closed late mainly die to the late start.

 The Rope. 3/05/99

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