Jakarta Hash House Harriers
Scribe
Sheet Run 1634
Hashshit Holder: Nick Leeson, Jonesy and Fanny
Run Number 1634 Hare: Nick Leeson Co-Hares: Jonesy, Fanny
Anzac Day Celebrated
What an excellent run. The site is one of the closest to Jakarta that still has reasonable running country and there was much speculation as to where the Hares would lead us. The toll road to the West could be crossed as could Jl. Alternatif to the North. To the South and East was the river so we could be going round in a circle, which we normally do anyway. The direction of the start was clever – off towards the toll road and then a turn to the right. The trail could be taking us left or right but it looked like we would be crossing a road. The gamble had to be taken by us SCBs – let’s guess we are going across the toll road and that the trail is a rightie. The path we were on went under the toll road and a bit farther on there was a bridge across the river and behold, back on paper. Easy, wasn’t it! The FRBs looked suitably peeved but there you go!
The trail continued into the hinterland through kampong and crops. Nothing too surprising. The hare had cautioned us to beware of slippery concrete and sure enough there was a few hundred metres of river embankment just a few centimetres wide of slippery concrete. The old Ibu whom we passed shouted after us that there was a safer path but of course we went where the paper went. The checks had kept the pack pretty well together and there was certainly a good variety of running conditions. Eventually the trail led us back to the toll road, passing under once again. These SCBs (The Rope and Herpes) were not to be fooled by the loop off to the right. It was time to start heading for home. There were good paths to follow and there in the distance was the start. A quick shortcut through crops got us nearer to--- the river. Backtracking left showed no way across. Try right into a kampong and ask the villagers. Yes a bridge down there to the right and then back on paper and we were heading On-In. A little trouble finding the circle as we lost paper in the dark but back for 6.10, before many of the runners apparently. A most enjoyable run. Interesting running and just the right length for this Scribe taking into account a couple of shortcuts which kept us not too far from the FRBs
The Rope – 24th April 2000
The Circle
The ANZAC day circle kicked off with appreciation for the
current committee members who have only two more weeks of abuse and mental
torture before the threat of re-election looms again .... Drink it down, down ,
down.....
Hashers were then solicited for their views of what ANZAC day was all about;
* First up was the Scottish version from Rabeye who suggested that our
antipodean colleagues, whilst attempting to make amends for their convict pasts
and lack of loyalty to the Crown, resorted to prostrating themselves
on the Turkish beaches in Sumatra??!!(did I hear correctly?)
* The Tom Jones' version, and it has to be said this speech was the longest
ever witnessed from the wee man, was a very well researched historical piece.
Apparently, the one (and some say only) battlefield victory in the history of
Turkey took place when the Infidels (ANZ) went off paper and found themselves
confronted with the wrath of Allah 85 years ago.
As the story goes, the infidels could not even fight their way out of a soggy
kebab and they were incapable of the usual trophies of war such as raping and
pillaging since they were having too much fun being shot on the beach.
* Sheep Skin gave the ANZAC version, a typical whinging affair, moaning on
about Churchill (was he out of nappies then?), King and Country and the wrong
type of sand on the beaches. Who says the Poms have a monopoly on whinging!
There were loads of new members and visitors ... an uncanny number of whom were
gate crashing/visiting Turks trying to upset ANZAC day proceedings. Moving swiftly on to the hashers' comments
on the run laid by Cooper Dick, Jonsie and Fanny. Initial comments gave the
hares hope they would avoid being ICED as Cheeseballs, Tarzan Speaking and Tom
Jones all gave it the thumbs up. However, the Hash Shit flood-gates then
opened. Rabeye described the run as a last minute effort, a good run gone wrong
(just as well the Hares had three reckies before laying it). Angie couldn't
understand why his best short cutting efforts of the millennium didn't prevent
him getting back before dark. Tony D thought it was a cloggy run rather than an
ANZA run; too much skating and screwing about on top of dykes. Holy Joop was a
bit confused calling it a happy run because he made it back but then upon
clarification changed to Hash Shit. Finally Next Week pronounced the run 50%
too long. In the end the verdict was clear ... Hash Shit ... ICE the B......s.
Other memorable moments of the evening included Tarzan (Speaking) being accused
by Rabeye of KKN/Suharto practices in obtaining Premier sponsorship to which
Tarzan protested loudly but incoherently. In view of Rabeye's obvious
generosity, Magic Dragon suggested he make a contribution to MD's 5 plus 1
recreation fund (no comment). Later Herb was caught playing with the Sadist's
trunk which he managed to extend several inches (something his wife had failed
to do for some years). The interesting thing about Herb is his ability to
incite the rain clouds into action whenever he commands the circle ... any
ideas why? ... answers on a postcard.
Tom Jones was presented with his 800 run tankard. For once he was lost for
words either through emotion or maybe because he over-exerted himself with
earlier ANZAC day speech. Sheep Skin commended this magnificent achievement by
the 1915 Galipollie veteran . Ice please.. Next up was Sadist who achieved 50
runs (in 23 years .... did he fall asleep or what?)... . More down, downs. Some
note worthy signing by the Colonel ... something about foul stench in the
mare?... the inks running again. It was around this time that the blue bottomed
Hares were allowed to rise from the ice and perform a few songs. Their songs
seemed to have a strong Aussie flavour but the quality of Cooper Dicks singing
made it impossible to tell for sure. Anyway thanks to them for the unlabelled
fire-water and the incredibly useful door prizes ... any one need a ˝ inch
willy warmer ! All in all a Hash Shit
of a run to remember. "Swing low ..." then On On to Oscars....
Amen.
Gay Gordon – stand in Scribe
Hash Stats – 29 Jakarta Hashers, 1 New Members, 6 Visitors = Total 36
Sponsors – Thanks to Oz Military for prizes and to Hares for the rum.
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