SCRIBE’S REPORT Run 1646 Date July 10th 2000 Hares Vibrator & Elephant Man

Statistics: Members 24, New Members 2, Visitors 4. Total 30. Site: Rafflesia

The Run

Yes, the pack was mercifully spared from yet another run from inside the Scout Camp, when the hares moved the birtruk to Bukit Rafflesia instead. That was the good part. The bad part was the run itself. A point to point (nothing wrong with that-remember the Oirish run?), the hares (Vibrator and Elephant Man) started of by dragging us through every shitty Kampung they could find within the first 30 minutes. If extra points were awarded for muck, shit, trash and Kampung, the hares would have won the Gold Medal. Unfortunately for the hares, this is not the case. After 30 minutes or so of this drudgery, the run opened up into the pleasant, verdant, countryside of Cibubur, complete with cascading, bubbling, azure streams teaming with trout. Brown trout. Past the Polisi doggie training centre (empty), past the whorehouse on the bridge (full) and then....the hare responsible for laying the long gaps in the paper trail started to make the gaps longer and longer. Darkness descended and one turd of the pack found themselves with no paper and no way of knowing where home was. There were calls for mob justice, Jakarta style. The hares should be doused in kerosene and set alight. Meanwhile back at the birtruk, the early arrivers (ie. short cutting bastards) were sipping cool beers and patting themselves on their backs for having the good sense to find out in advance where the end was - Restoran Sate Bang Dul on Jl. Alternatif, to be exact). Out on the trail things were still grim. Konkorde and SheepsKin were plotting to cook and eat MGM should they not reach the Birtruk and have to stay the night. In the event it was not necessary, as they fell over some paper in the dark and got back to the birtruk at 7:00pm (Konkorde, SheepsKin, MGM, Fanny and (I think) Half Suck from Kupang HHH.

The Circle

Annunciation’s:

Next Weeks Run : 1647, Tom Jones and Mudguard, Sentul Selatan. The site cost Rp500,000, so everybody is expected to pay Rp350,000 each to contribute to the cost. That should cover it.

Bogor Hash are having a "Bike Hash" on July 23rd. Contact Spokes at pipoel@bogor.net <mailto:pipoel@bogor.net>.

Krakatau HH are having a run on July 23rs at 4:00pm. Somebody's birthday. To coincide with this, Batavia HH are having a run in Anyer on Saturday 22nd. Contact SheepsKin or Ralph.

Panindo Hash is still scheduled for August 19th and 20th. Yippee.

The Welch are giving advance notice that next years St. David's run will actually last for two weeks, and will finish at the start of the Oirish run. Yes kernal bludclot, I know that Welch is not actually spelled "Welch". Welch is actually the name of an actress with very large breasts.

Speaking of large breasts, Konkorde (now known as Brazil Nuts), has started a Hash in the slums of Sao Paolo. He says the girls in Sao Paolo have large breasts and he likes working there.

And then there was the run discussion. Co-hare Elephant man is no fool, even though he is Welch. While the hare, Vibrator, was out in the darkness rounding up stragglers, Elephant Man was carefully listening to the grumbling going on before the circle started. And as soon as the run dscussion started, he immediately took advantage of his partners absence to say that (aboout vibrator) "I don't know him, I don't like him. I deny all knowledge". "I don't use cigars and I never saw that blue dress before". He even accused his absent friend of being a vegetarian.

But the pack was not impressed. Brazil Nuts, referring to the lack of paper said he thought the hares had hiccups. More like seizures. Herpes agreed that the laying was very erotic. Bludclock wanted to know who laid all the gaps. Half Suck, a visitor from Kupang said that the hares were anal retentive. Now, Half Suck is American, and "anal retentive" seems to be an American expression. You never hear a European calling somebody anal retentive. That's because we Europeans don't actually understand what it means. Looking at the words, "anal" and "retentive" this would imply that ones anus is t\retaining something. Now the only thing that an anus could retain (buggery excluded) is shit. So, American hashers out there, please enlighten us. Does "anal retentive" actually mean "full of shit".

Tom (Barnaby) Jones leaped to the hares defence by pointing out that the hares had voluntarily stood in to hare this run with only one weeks notice. Sounds a little like "Your honour, in the case of the murder of my wife, I wish to say that it was not premeditated, since I only had one week to think about it". Nice try, Barnaby Jones.

Finally, HM Herpes declared the run verdict as "A shit of a run on ice". Congratulations hares, a new class of run has been invented.

Just as well it was not a hash shit, as the hash shit board is full. Right Maaaandi?

Meanwhile, with the clock at 7:30, there was no sign of Vibrators driver (the real brains behind the run, obviously). Ever quick witted, this prompted Bludcloth to quip "What's the similarity between Anwar Ibrahim and Vibrator? They're both going to fuck their drivers if they ever see them again.

Then it was time to sing. Starting with the voice of the Pits, the crooner from Hell : Elephant Man. The only man in the world with fewer notes in his head than Aunt Anguish. Both Hares sang songs about whores, obviously inspired by the little whorehouse on the bridge.

Finally, piss of and hats on the floor, followed by makan at Sate Bang Dul. Yum Yum pigs Bum.

Scribe Pretty Boy

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