Jakarta Hash House Harriers
Scribe
Sheet Run 1661
SCRIBE’S REPORT Run: 1661 Date: October 16, 2000
Hares: Leeky John, Paul Sheeps kin, Ringo Kock and Crusty Geaorge
Statistics: 37 runners Site: Cibubur
The Run
I normally don’t write about the runs, because you have been there, and why read the book after you have seen the movie. But this was an exceptionally well-laid run. Rather new and nice area, no seven kinds of paper from other hashes, lots of good checks, which kept the pack together. A bit (too) long, but there were lots of paper and arrows in the last part, so one could not get lost. And each time you felt a bit tired, there were some comforting words painted on the path, like “She loves you” and “Yeah, yeah, yeah”, which kept you going again (why don’t other hares do this too?). It ended with artistic designed T-shirts (finally a shirt you can let your servant iron without having to blindfold her) and a free songbook of almost professional layout and print, complete with a plastic cover to prevent early deterioration due to hands wetted by Anker or other pollutants. The only one who did not find the run a bit long was Yoshi, who came in only 1 hour late compared with the usual 2 hours. The run was unanimously voted an “excellent run”.
The Circle
Today it was not a normal circle, because the Beatles (who are active hashers in Liverpool) paid us a visit and sang almost their complete repertoire. I know that they are not the youngest anymore, but it was a sad sight to see those old worn faces and sagging bodies. To camouflage their state of deterioration, they put on their best clothes. For a hash performance they might even have been a bit overdressed, but one has to realize that they are show people. Especially Ringo Cock dared to show his feminine side, by showing us his beautiful legs, under a magnificent coat and nice socks which accentuated his well-shaped knees.
But their voices were still great. Crusty George with his high soprano, and Leeky John as lead singer. It was also depressing to see how Alzheimer has got the better of our fabulous four, as they could not remember any lyrics and had to read them, Paul Sheepskin had to use +8 reading glasses, really old age is catching up with them. Leeky John (no he is not dead, he now hides in Indonesia under the alias Leeky, because he got fed-up with this bossy Yoko-bitch) was really still the soul of the pack. It was disclosed that he wrote all the lyrics. This made me curious and I asked him for a songbook, so I could study the lyrics a bit better.
Now I finally realized, that in the past I never really listened to the lyrics, but boy when you analyze them, they are so romantic, so deep, so full of feelings, that by reading them I got tears in my eyes. What about the phrase “Screwing is easy with your eyes closed, then when they’re ugly you can’t see”. This is so considerate, so sweet to also give the ugly ones a chance to get laid. Have you ever listened to the song labeled as “Money” yes labeled, to get through the sensors, but if you listen well they actually sing “Pussy (that’s want I want)” and they are even philosophical, when they put this immediately in perspective by singing “Pussy is not everything that is true, But without it you can’t screw”. What a truth (poofters might disagree though) is hidden in these 2 beautiful lines. From their recent tour through Thailand they sang the song: “Pussy a la Thai” which was immediately followed by “Hey Bude” which was inspired by their visit (after Thailand) to our famous medical genius.
During the recital the circle was quiet, many of the normally hard Hashers found it difficult to keep their eyes dry. When Leeky John sang the phrase of the song titled “Getting W(B)etter”: “You guys just like us falsely married white trash,” Rubberturd could not contain himself anymore, he started to sob loudly and had to be consoled by Holy Joop.
But after the recital was finished even Holy Joop was not able anymore to continue to take notes, he was so overwhelmed that he left the circle to go home. This had nothing to do with the fact that he was in one car with B-1-on, who had a Hot Date waiting for him in his house. B-1-on tried continuously to get Holy to leave the circle arguing that Holy anyhow never scribes about what has happened and most of the time has his sheets ready before the run.
Not this time B-1-on, who was seen wringing his hands, feverishly smoking one cigar after the other and talking on his handphone begging his date to wait. No anybody who has ever questioned Holy’s dedication to the job (and who hasn’t) was proven wrong on this Beatles night. He resisted the biggest threats of B-1-on. “Holy for GM” some people called in the circle, but they are too late, he is already in discussion for this position with the Batavia Hash, who were faster to understand the qualities of this celebrated scribe.
Browneye, the onslaught of Beatlemania almost made us forget this achiever. He was rewarded by a fresh washed 300 run T-shirt and as this was also his 70th birthday, he received the KK-award. A strange looking kimono designed for the pot-belly of KK. To avoid getting this award makes it worth to commit suicide before getting 70. It was rumoured that KK in fact is a tranvestite and was in reality the mother of Yoko Ono. As she (KK) was – rightfully - ashamed of this he had himself changed into a man.
On, on, on,
From Holy Joop
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