Jakarta Hash House Harriers
Scribe
Sheet Run 1690
HASHSHIT HOLDERS: Tarzan, Gay Gordon (Run 1689)
Run 1690 Date 9th April 2001
Hares : KK, Yoshi, Postponed
Statistics: Members 23, New Members 7, Wisitors 1 Total 31.
Site: Gunung Putri(ish)
The Run: Japanese
Torture Ring
The omens were not good... not only had the previous Friday and Monday runs been Hash Shits (totally unfairly in the latter case) it had been pouring cats and dogs for 2 hours prior to this ominous death march. The first gripe though is SuperBrat’s directions because they implied that run started just off the Gunung Putri turn-off; he failed to mention the 20 minute mountain trail after the turn off to the land of Guliver’s tonka toys on the side of Gunung Cement.
I eventually arrived, neck and trunk with Elephant Man and set off together having received the Hi Hi nods from the inscrutable Japo Hares. Well all I can say is that there was no running on the wee bit countryside we managed to cross. Just up the track we found Gringo then a rather cheesed-off Nick Leeson up to their groins in buffalo shit. It was at this stage that we pooled our meagre resources to find out what the pack had found 20 minutes earlier, namely a horrendous big loop. Fortunately we were unable to find the break out point (if there ever was one) in this eternal ring of travesty, unlike the other poor sods in front that obviously had, and for their sins eventually found themselves returning at the wrong side of 7pm. Let’s be thankful for small yellow mercies.
The Circle: The
Reluctant HM
So no Herpes and no Bolt-one-one then that means the reluctant, shrinking violet Elephant Man would have to step up to the plate. After much consideration and drawing on a newly lit cigarette E Man finally got the road on the show by presenting Magic Dragon with the one thing he had always longed for ... a 12 inch phallic thing with two heads and three balls. Unfortunately this obscene vegetation thing was no substitute for the real thing although MD took some persuading otherwise. The final conclusion of the jury was that you too could have a grotesque protrusion such as that of MD if you spend too much time down in, and wriggling about in, Block M.
Nick Leeson, the apparent upholder of law and order was brought to order for use of artificial aids namely a flash-light to make sure he didn’t get lost again.
By this time only the SCB’s had made it back … none of those eternally “on-paper” hashers had yet come in. Would the Jap Hares send out a search party … would they nothing.
Th Run Discussion:
The Return of the Magnificent 7 (plus the lagging Betawi’s)
On-in the smug and rather large contingent of Hares including Yoshi, KK, ..etc founders of the ritual Japo death march. SheepsKin began in his interesting way, by talking about closed loops and lack of paper. It was only then at (6.55pm) that the FRBs Koncrete Kock and John Bastard dragged their sorry asses in. Koncrete Kock needed a few minutes to regain his composure before airing his less than complementary views on this run. Most memorable were his descriptions of being up to his beam-end in Buffalo shit and, showing us how to look for paper in the dark by crawling around on his hands and knees. So what exactly had happened Hares? Well it appears that the hares inadvertently set two runs; one based on a 4-hour laying and the other of 1 hour. No wonder there were still 5 magnificent members out there, together with 75% of Tarzan Betawi hash group.
BraveHart who arrived late, got stuck up the behind of ItchyCock and ended up running backwards to relieve his predicament. Nick Leeson, obviously prolonging the discussion as much as possible so that latecomers may arrive in time to give comments, thought it had to be a good run as Colonel Bloodknock was still out there. It was just at this time, 2 hours and 10 minutes after they set off that Angie, BloodKnock, Witless, Tom Jones and Pretty Boy staggered in. So what did you think of this run Angie. Again a few moments to compose himself then the hatred of 50 years ago was uttered with surprising wit and eloquence – obviously not a great lover of the Jap’s though. Then BloodKnock, in somewhat of a spiteful mood, because it was not raining and he was not RA, said it a great run to rile, just Angie and Koncrete Kock. Ultimately the stand-in Hash master was swayed by the KKN jogging give-aways from the Hares and called it an excellent run … what a travesty!
Announcements
Next Weeks run – welsh death march at Emeralda gold course (Cimanggis turn off).
Nash Hash – it’s soon and Koncrete Kock will be sole representative of JH3
Pan Indo Hash – Tarzan will provide lots more details lots more times.
The Wind-up
So what’s up Tarzan .. why you look so worried. Tarzan no see Betawi friends. Tarzan think maybe this big disaster for Betawi hash . Tarzan could lose 75% of Betawi hash .. heap big problem. Tarzan start peeping horn and flashing headlights of car. Ok, good luck.
To take Tarzan’s mind off things Magic Dragon tried some singing but that didn’t appear to cheer Tarzan up. Nor did the Postpones sweet lullaby. And so it was that things were wound up by a low swing and fly past by the late-pass holder Vatican Rag. Then the Hares treated us to cold Jap food and warm saki .. a great combination.
Scribe : Gay Gordon
Post Script: Its now 9pm. There is a cheer from Tarzan as the Betawi hashers are at last reunited. Oh how I love a happy ending!
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