Kiss From a Rose
by White Cat
I've been doing lots of GW fics recently, so I decided to see if I could still do YYH. And it still comes a lot easier than GW does, so I guess I'm safe. ^_^ And "EnR" is still sorta glaring at me in the background ... I should work on that next, I suppose ...
This is a sorta deathfic. (Yeah, *sorta*.) Someone's dead, but he's been so for a while.
And I guess it's yaoi, though I guess "love" here could be interpreted as brotherly ... s'up you readers. ^_^
Be warned, you might not like how Hiei is portrayed in this ... < sweatdrops>
Ja~, minna! ^_^
--WhiteCat
One thing I promised myself to never do was fall in love.
After all, it was my mother's love for a man that created me, in the first place.
But for *what*? To be thrown away, hours after birth, into a world that could never understand the subtle pain of a little child? To become some sort of martyr; a dangerous figure used to scare *acceptable* children into obedience?
What a crock of shit. I wanted none of it.
I still don't.
But you were stubborn, aren't you? You wouldn't take "no" for an answer; you kept trying to find your way into my world; to break down the barriers I have spent years cultivating and building upon, and find your way into my heart.
Maybe you were successful. I wouldn't know, since I've never been in love before.
I just know I can't forget you.
It makes me angry.
What happened to my control? What happened to the strength I used to pride myself on? The power that I was known and feared for?
What have you done to me?!
I should hate you.
Maybe I do.
Hate and love are supposed to be separated by a very fine line, after all.
And all I know is that, every time I close my eyes, you're there; either smiling and flushed with life, like you were before, or bloody and gray-skinned, as you were the last time I saw you ... after I ...
It surprised everyone, you know.
They didn't think I'd kill you.
*I* didn't think I'd kill you. But you were too damn persistent. And I can't let anyone close. That's my life motto, and it has protected me for countless years on my own.
So when you got too close, I did the best thing I could:
I lashed out.
And you ended up dying, in my arms. And your last words were breathed in my ear; a prayer of words that I have sworn never to utter myself ...
"I love you."
You know, I used to think you were smart. Now, I wonder.
How could you still say you loved me, after I killed you? You knew you were dying; hell, it would've been obvious to anyone who might've stumbled in upon us.
Yet you still said it.
Baka.
Now what am I supposed to do?
You're gone, but I still can't forget you. Does that mean I hate you, or that I ...
I ...
Impossible!
I'm not that weak - all I have to do is remember what I have gone through because of my mother's love, to strengthen my resolve to never feel that damning emotion.
I won't put anyone through that sort of torture. Especially not myself.
You couldn't understand that, could you? You had close to a thousand years of experience, yet you ignored the signals and plowed ahead.
Stupid. Brave, but stupid.
But you'll be glad to know you were at least somewhat successful. You're in my heart, now, and I'll remember you for the rest of my life.
Of course, I'll remember the Fool, too; my sister hasn't made the same vow against love I have, and at least he can make her smile ...
That's more than I can do.
So rest assured, you idiot.
I'll remember you - both with hate ...
... and with love.
Sayonara, Kurama.
Iie, Minamino Shuuichi. Kurama probably still lives on, in some forest in
the Makai, far, far away from me.
Sayonara.