Folk Tales : The Little
Gingerbread Koorime
by Cresent Star
Disclaimer:
All the characters used are the porperty of Yoshihiro Togashi. I'm just
'playing' with them, that's all.....
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Once upon a
time, in the Makai, far, far away, a little cheery girl by the name of Botan
decided it was high time she baked something. She had flunked Home Ec in junior
high, but that was alright.
So with that
bright idea in her mind, she happily set off to collect the ingredients needed.
These ingredients included some totally weird Makai herbs (magic herbs, for the
sake of the story), flour, confectioner's sugar, lemon peel, etc.
Now Botan,
being the complete ditz she was, had gotten the recipe for ginger bread men and
nasty, red eyed fire youkai mixed up. She didn't discover this mistake until
much later.
"Ooh
look! The ginger bread man is coming out just fine!" she grinned. The
gingerbread man had been in the oven for the past twenty minutes and she had
been watching the whole time because she had nothing better to do.
The
'gingerbread man' was soon ready to be taken out of the oven. Botan had the
shock of her life when she removed the cookie tin as a small, bad tempered fire
youkai jumped out and tried to kill her.
"What
the hell did you think you were doing?" he snarled.
"Umm...
baking gingerbread men?" she replied meekly.
"Why did
you have to create me??"
"I ...
created... you?"
"Yes!"
"Oh."
the idea obviously had a hard time trying to tunnel itself through her skull.
"What do
you have to say?"
"Er,
sorry?"
The fire
demon didn't reply. Instead, he left the cottage in which Botan live in rage.
Okay, he trashed the little country cottage, *then* left.
The fire
youkai made his way aimlessly through the Makai forest, muttering curses about
why he was being dragged into a totally lousy world and insulting all the forest
animals he met. Along the way, he met a skunk with a really weird hairdo.
"Hi! My name is Kuwabara! So nice to meet you!"
"Go to
hell."
The skunk
paused in consternation at the unfriendly remark. He hit upon a brilliant idea
on how to make peace with the unpleasant fire youkai.
"Please
little fire youkai, sing a song for me!"
"Why the
hell should I? Get lost!"
"Please?"
"No!"
The skunk
continued to plead with him, so in order to get rid of the little pest, the fire
youkai took off his head with the Jaou Ensatsu Ken. The last thing the skunk saw
was probably Hiei unsheathing his sword.
The fire
youkai continued on his *un-merry* way beacuse he knew as sure as hell he didn't
have anywhere else to go. Hiei (by the way, that's the fire youkai's name)
encountered another forest creature that had a song request.
"Hi! I'm
Yuusuke! Please sing for me!"
"Get out
my way, worm."
"Please,
just a few bars!"
"Fine."
The worm
brightened.
"Jaou
Ensatsu Ken!"
So much for
the little worm.
Unbeknownst
to Hiei (but beknownst to us), he was being watched and stalked even as he fried
the little worm extra crispy. He was nearing a marshy part of the forest when he
bumped, quite literally, into his stalker. The golden eyed youko stared at him.
"I'm not
going to sing for you, " he stated resolutely.
"You're
not?" the youko pouted.
"No!"
"Pretty
please?" the youko attempted a Big Cute Eyes Look (tm) on him.
"NO!"
"Pretty,
pretty, please, with pink bows and cherries on top?" he wheedled, while he
used his youki to make the vines behind Hiei wave about menacingly. Okay! Okay!
They tried to eat him... no biggie!
Hiei took one
look at the demon plants and changed his mind. "Oh *fine*..."
Quite
surprisingly, the bad tempered youkai had a rather nice voice. It was a
beautiful bass with sensual under currents and-- oh, who the hell am I trying to
kid?!
"Little
fire youkai, I can tell you have a sweet voice, but I can't hear you clearly!
Please come closer!"
Grumbling,
uttering some unprintable things under his breath, Hiei went closer to the Big
Bad Youko.
"I
*still* can't hear you properly! Please come closer!"
The demon
plants threatening to eat him told him that it would be a really good idea.
"Please
youkai, come closer so I can really hear you!" Hiei was just one foot away
from the Big Bad Youko now. His singing had gotten some what nervous. But before
he could react, the Big Bad Youko pounced on him and ate him *all* up. (heh, heh,
heh...)
"Ku..ra...ma..?"
he squeaked.
"Good,
" replied the youko. "Now you know what name to scream."
With that, the youko jumped and screwed him again.
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The End!
The moral of
the story: Do not trust Golden eyed youkos that have the ability to control
plants and go by the name of "Kurama".
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Cresent
Star(c)1998