Solo Style: Being Single Isn't a State of Waiting

By Sherry Amatenstein

No matter how "together" a couple feel, how melded, how much a unit, even if their two hearts beat as one, it'll take more than true love to get them into a movie theater; it'll take two -- not one, two -- tickets. Whatever a pair of lovers want to do together in life, unless they're literally joined at the hip (though this might be a gray area), on some level they've got to go it alone. Read the stub: ADMIT ONE.

Actually, I prefer going to movies alone. If I want to bawl loudly, belly laugh or dive-bomb into a keg of greasy popcorn, there's no need to censor my urges. I can let all the stuff that would embarrass an "other half" all hang out. It's just me and me at the Bijou and we're having a wonderful time.

I'm not anti-romance. I'm not advocating hermitdom. I'm simply saying there's nothing shameful about relying on one's own company as entertainment on a Saturday night. It sure beats dating someone boring (brain-dead?) so you won't be branded a loser. Check the dictionary: "loser" doesn't mean "dateless"; it means "squander." As in squandering your time, your heart, your soul, not to mention the TV clicker.

Your life doesn't start when two-become-one; single isn't a state of waiting. If that's how you regard it, wake up and smell the opportunities, babe. You're missing out. In the decade-plus since my divorce (gee, time flies when you're having fun), I've seen Costa Rican sunsets and Alaskan northern lights, performed with the Rockettes and the Moscow Circus and co-hosted a live TV talk show with Matt Lauer. I've also furnished my apartment, set up an IRA and sponsored an overseas foster child. I have highs, lows, great friends and a great need for down time: time spent alone.

I'm not saying no to remarriage, but saying "I do" doesn't guarantee forever. Even if I don't want to always live alone, that's the way I'll enter heaven (if that's my final destination). And while I'm here on Earth, I can hitch a ride but I can't freeload on someone else's ticket. Hey, the lights are dimming; the movie's starting. Enjoy. The popcorn's on me.