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was late one night when the largest shock of my life occurred. Rain fell
hard that night, pounding on the walls of our home as if nature had
singled out my mother and I for extermination. But we were safe inside,
with a fire burning to stay the cold. Mother had just returned from
work, and as usual she was exhausted. The storm had plastered her hair
to her head, and her lips were blue from the elements. She squatted next
to the fire and rubbed her hands together as she sought warmth.
I walked over to my mother and rubbed her back to speed up her recovery. “How was work, Mama?” I asked. “Terrible,” she grunted, between the chattering of her teeth. “There is war nearby...some warlord or something. There were so many soldiers at the tavern, and they are not happy.” She looked at the excitement in her eyes. “No, Ken-chan, your father was not one of them.”
Water began to form in my eyes, in that slow and uncontrollable way common for a boy who has been disappointed time and again. I sniffed as my nose began to run, and my mother began to dab at my nose with the cuff of her sleeve. “Now now,” she would fuss, “that isn’t how a man acts. What would your father think if he saw you crying?” She always used my nonexistent father to discipline me, and it often worked. The tears would flow, but I stayed silent - not a whimper escaped my lips. It took a while, but Mother finally calmed me down. Just as she was settling down to have some warm barley tea, a banging sounded at the door. My mother did not react at first - I suppose she was tired - then her half-closed eyes widened as she turned to the door. I moved to answer the knocking, but Mother sharply barked out “No!” and rose to her feet so quickly it was as if her energy had never left.
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She rushed to the door and flew it wide open,
not caring that the rain was still falling just outside. Two armored
hands grabbed her by the arms and pulled her out of the doorway. “Hideki!”
she screamed, almost as loud as the downpour. “I knew you would come
back. Oh, my love...” I walked cautiously towards the door and gained
a better view of the stranger who had a familiar name. My mother had her
head buried in the breastplate of a soldier. He was tall, even more due
to strict, dispassionate posture. Although he did not seem older than
other warriors I had seen in town, he had magnificently silver hair,
which was tied behind him in the fashion of a respected man. Leaning in
the doorway beside him was a long, ivory yari. I stood there, unable to comprehend what
someone older would have in moments. Who was this stranger, and why was
my mother hugging him so? The man had not noticed me when Mother finally
broke away from him long enough to speak. “Hideki, my love. There is
something I never told you...” she said as she turned towards me. “This
is... Kentaro.” The man, who at this moment I realized was my father,
looked at me, turned to my mother, then looked back at me again. I saw
no love in his eyes, no wonder...nothing but shock. There was silence
for what seemed like forever as he stared. When he finally spoke, it was
so unemotional that one might have believed he was reading from a book.
“I am a respected man, and I have only one family.” With that, he
turned and headed out into the rain. My mother turned to me with a look
I had never seen from her before...hatred, then she rushed out into the
rain, attempting to stop a man who would never acknowledge her again. Still standing in the doorway was his abandoned
yari.
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