it doesn't mean much

it doesn't mean anything at all

the life I've left behind me

is a cold room

I've crossed the last line

from where I can't return

where every step I took in faith

betrayed me

and led me from my home

and sweet

sweet surrender

is all that I have to give

you take me in

no questions asked

you strip away the ugliness

that surrounds me

are you an angel

am I already that gone

I only hope

that I won't disappoint you

when I'm down here on

my knees

and sweet

sweet

sweet surrender

is all that I have to give

sweet

sweet

sweet surrender

is all that I have to give

and I don't understand

by the touch of your hand

I would be the one to fall

I miss the little things

oh I miss everything

it doesn't mean much

it doesn't mean anything at all

the life I left behind me

is a cold room

~ Sara Mclachlan, "Sweet Surrender"

Lina grinned at Zel as they snuck out of the castle, barely controlling her giggle fit. A distant part of her thought she must be hysterical after all that had happened, but she shrugged and told it frankly that she didn't care. They scurried past the guard at the gate and ran for it outside the palace walls. Reaching the forest Lina burst into uncontrolled laughter, falling back against a tree and laughing for the sheer joy of laughing. It had been so long since she'd laughed, and even longer since she had laughed for absolutely no reason at all. It was thoroughly intoxicating, and she never wanted to forget the feeling.

Zel couldn't help chuckle too; Lina's pure delight was contagious. Seeing her so happy, him not having to feel the demon inside him constantly trying to escape, and being free…

Lina grinned and tacked Zel, pinning him to the ground. He laughed aloud and flipped her over to catch her by her shoulders she slipped loose and shoved him into a bush and danced back, giggling uncontrollably. He emerged, covered with twigs and leaves stuck on various parts of his anatomy. She laughed and he advanced towards her and she stopped laughing. He caught her arm and she shrieked, grinning and yelping as he picked her up and tossed her in another bush. She held tight.

Finally, both having tickled themselves out, Lina and Zel fell asleep under a hanging willow by the pond.

And Lina promised herself never to go back.

* * *

Xellos wasn't sure how he felt. On the upside, Lina had apparently left her kingdom without looking back, which gave him a chance to take over. On the downside, that obnoxious, infuriating little freak was sleeping with his Lina…Thruth, they were actually sleeping, but still.

He stood immediately and paced the room. He was extremely thankful for this mirror. Although he couldn't see exactly where his targets were, he could get complete sight of the target itself. He would have to remember to get some flowers for the soothsayer he killed for it.

He turned to his rose window and looked out. This was quite a two sided turn of events, he mused, as he picked absentmindedly at the tapestry hanging from the windowsill. What to do….what to do…

Well, obviously he should first take over her kingdom. That part was easy. She really did care for it; she was ready to kill Zelgadis to save it. It would be quite a blow to her psyche, scarred as it was.

Yes, healed, but scarred. And scars could be split open.

Pity he couldn't curse Zelgadis again. But that was a spell that once broken, it couldn't be recast. Damn. Xellos reminded himself to figure out a spell more permanent.

Not that it wasn't permanent. It should have been utterly impossible to break. But Lina had broken it. Xellos looked it up it the spellbook he kept in netherspace for a quick check. He never really needed the book, but it was useful for double checking. Never throw away a tool because you think you don't need it, because then you will at your most dire time.

Ah! Here it was.

Right there. Never to be broken. And she did it.

Xellos started laughing. Of course, his Lina always was special. Maybe it was made for normal humans, the spellbook was quite a bit outdated.

He tossed it into the dustbin as he walked out the door.

* * *

Sylphiel was meanwhile running franticly through the palace. "Your Highness! Your Highness! Lina-San!!!"

Running so hard, in fact, that she ran straight into Amelia. "Amelia! Have you seen her highness?" Sylphiel stared at her with frightened, panicking eyes and gripped the poor girl's shoulders so hard it hurt. Amelia looked with a startled expression at Sylphiel's frightened one.

"No, Sylphiel-san, I haven't--"

"Dammit!" It was the first time Amelia had heard the lady in waiting swear. "Where did she go?"

"Hello."

The two spun around to see a man in purple from head to toe, With frozen eyes and a cold smile.

"I believe I'll be taking charge around about now?"

* * *

What happens when a ruler leaves his or her country? It chooses a new ruler, usually.

But what happens when The ruler held her people? What happens when the ruler was what kept her people alive in the morning? What happens if the ruler is the reason that all the tiny little threats didn't become big ones?

And what happens if the new ruler isn't chosen? What if the new ruler chooses himself?

Well, sometimes it all turns out alright.

Sometimes it doesn't.

Find a continent.

Zoom in.

Find a country.

Zoom in.

Find a town.

Zoom in.

Find a building.

Zoom in.

Find a small little cramped room in the back.

Zoom in.

What do you see?

You may see a child, crying with fear at the lightning outside. Or you may find a young girl, clutching her fiddle to her chest and trying to fight off the pains of ever-present hunger. You may see a boy with no friends, no family, and no future. It may be an old woman whose world passed away long ago but won't give up, and is slowly dying from it.

I don't think you'll find happiness.

Follow the streets. Look to the sides at the gutter trash and filth in the gutters. Rats and mice scurry along beside scampering pickpockets, and screams emanate from alleys that you turn away and hope you're not next. Swaggering policemen walk up and down streets calling all's well while a traveler behind them is mugged.

This is what happens when a ruler doesn't love their country. What a country has a dictator that wanted to be king, but doesn't want the responsibility that goes with it. When the one in charge of it just doesn't care.

This is what you see…

When a country is dying.