Softly.

Softly.

Lina padded down the hallways, twisting through the broken mazes of doors and skipping over the upended furniture. There was something important, something about it, but she didn’t care. She danced across the littered remains, ignoring the jabs at her conscience.

A broken rose window shattered into pieces littered the floor.

Lina danced by.

Broken shards of glass scattered over a painting of a young queen with ancient eyes.

Lina danced by.

A lock of golden hair drifted by her feet.

Lina danced by.

A deep blue stone lay on the floor. It was familiar, a calming presence on a heart she hadn’t realized was fluttering dangerously out of reach.

Lina stopped and lifted the rock to look at it closely.

That’s…right…

The wings were broken, broken, but not beyond mending.

Lina shrieked as the ground beneath her lifted and swayed. She was thrown from her feet and felt her self-control slip away as she saw the specter before her.

"no…" She managed, feeling herself stand and walk towards it. Horror laced through her, tinged with disgust and betrayal, pain and fear.

"N…NO!" She shreiked, pulling at the invisible hands binding her. "No! Not you!!"

Xellos grinned and motioned her forward, silken purple hair falling in rivulets over his cruel shoulders. Lina felt her feet comply, while her mind screamed in pure terror and defiance.

Move NOW! Or he will have you!

* * *

Lina woke with a start, eyes widened until the muscles of her eyelids spasmed and her pupils hurt. Covered with cold sweat, she gasped in breath like a drowning woman, clutching at the covers for anchor and tried to recover her stolen balance before looking around.

I need… to calm down.

She looked over at the slumbering form of Zelgadis next to her and began the task of disentangling herself from him, carefully lifting his limbs from hers so he would not awaken. I love you. I trust you. Beloved friend, partner of my heart, never leave me, never let me lose you. She paused and smiled at him, beautiful in the moonlight. I need you. The sheets were wrinkled and twisted about them, but Lina managed to pull herself from the bed and across the frozen floorboards. Yanking on her carelessly thrown away clothes, Lina tossed her hair out of her way and padded on bare feet over to her boots. She smiled as she pulled a few hairs loose from her mass of red and tied them to the sword Zelgadis always carried with him.

Softly stepping over his carelessly discarded items of clothing, she turned again at the door and smiled. She leaned against the doorframe feeling the rough wood beneath her fingers while not seeing the grain in the darkness.

"I will always save you. If only from yourself." She said softly, and turned to leave.

Deep in his sleep, Zelgadis stirred and smiled.

* * *

"How?"

Zelgadis and Valteira looked at eachother. That was the only question haunting them as they trudged towards the palace. Armies could be amassed, but did they have the time? The silent redhead ahead of them ran her hand through her hair in an unknowing gesture, letting the auburn strands slide back into place behind her. Neither knew where they were following Lina to, but they did know it was out of the city, and they knew they were heading in a huge circle. There was no logical reason, but neither of them wanted to question the dead woman walking before them.

"We ask." Both men looked startled as Lina finally spoke after hours of silence. Val had no clue what was wrong, and Zelgadis had been kicking himself over what he mistakenly thought was his own fault the past week.

Lina looked haunted.

Soft lashes lidded deep red orbs filled with one thing, one goal. She wouldn’t rest, hardly moved, only ate with the air of one knowing they had to if they were to do anything. Lina was a woman with a mission, a need as overpowering as water for a man in the desert.

And one thought.

I will NEVER be his.

"What do you mean, we ask?" Val questioned softly. This was not the Lina he knew—this was a frightening madwoman, only sane in the sense that she knew what was happening to her.

She didn’t answer as a man of undetermined age stepped onto the road before her. Zelgadis and Val instantly went for their weapons, but Lina didn’t move.

"Ah, Henrich. Are they ready for me?" She smiled, a smile of a warrior, mediator, liberator and protector.

A smile of a queen. The man bowed before her, his worn brown leather creaking as he bent in ways new to it.

Or perhaps forgotten.

"As ready as they’ll ever be, my queen." He said, as fully thirty men stepped from inside buildings scattered through the small town. Each wore a dusty uniform, and each carried a weapon that he obviously knew how to use. Before them was an army, an army that clearly knew what they were doing. Fear could be overcome—but true love and loyalty was something one held on to for as long as possible. Lina held their hearts before, and she was here to save them now.

Zelgadis and Val stood, mouths catching flies.

Lina turned to them and grinned. She flipped her cascade of red hair before tying it up in a warrior’s braid, Sharpening her features and making her look less like Lina and more like someone Zelgadis had seen once on his trail.

"What? You hadn’t thought I’d gone mad, had you?"

* * *

Every village they passed, every town they entered, every city the crossed through, they gained more. The army marched behind them on it’s way to the palace, surrounded on three sides by the forest Lina so distantly missed.

Lina stood directing the archery teams in the hunt, inspecting the traps and readying them all for the war ahead. Zelgadis leaned against the rough bark of the tree and stared at her, watching the purposeful movements make her fiery hair twist in it’s binding like a wounded animal. That’s how he felt, leaning against the wood and staring through the green foliage. How could he pretend to know her? This wasn’t Lina. She had become what she needed to be, but what of herself?

Zelgadis had asked once where all the fighters had come from. Lina had grinned and flipped her head.

"What," She had replied, "you didn’t think My army would be stupid enough to join Xellos or wait until he killed them all, did you?"

From then on, Zelgadis and Val had followed behind, feeling like extra wheels. Lina wasn’t the Lina they knew-- she was a queen. A queen who knew exactly what to do, where to go, and how to get there.

And they were merely taggers on. Zelgadis had frequent dreams at night, waking up screaming to find Lina looking at him coolly over her maps and charts. After staring at him for a while, she would return her gaze to the plans before her, ignoring his insanely jealous form.

Xellos had stolen her from him again. Zelgadis could only see, feel, hear the rage pounding in his ears before he calmed his body down enough to fall into a fitful sleep. As more days passed and she only became more insistent on one goal, Zelgadis felt the constant anger taking it’s physical toll. Each time he failed in something he could have done easily were fury not dominating his senses, each time he saw Lina look at him with disappointment, he wanted nothing more than to rip the throat of Xellos out through his stomach, to pull off his genitals and ram them through his grinning teeth.

Lina wasn’t Lina anymore. She was who she needed to be, a weapon he had seen too many times, a voiceless leader standing up for everything but herself. And he knew she was doing what she thought was right.

Maybe she was right.

But Zelgadis could only wonder what would happen if Lina found out she couldn’t get back to herself. She had so much trouble in the past…

As the Army made it’s slow way through the back of the woods, he could only wonder if his Lina would ever return from her cool, controlled shell of death.

Or if she would be Xellos’ forever.

* * *

The redheaded commander pulled the last strap on her leather-and-chainmail protection, wishing it could protect her from more than a simple knife or sword. The slim girl's hair was pulled up in a severe warrior's braid, high on her head to be easy to chop off if it was grabbed, well-bound out of her way so it didn't impede her movements. Her armor was light but well made, able to stop most blows but let her move easily, more than important for a small fighter. She looked like a highly specialized dagger might if it was human-- small, slim, and made to go fast. Deadly despite seeming daintiness, and no knowing what poison it carried.

But too much poison on the blade can corrode it if you leave it too long.

The troops looked up as she suddenly stood, holding her short sword before her and picking up the stolen crossbow. She stared ahead as though she didn't see anything, her voice a slow monotone with no emotion. Even the most loyal felt a slight tremor of fear slide down their backs to see the dead, fixated glared in her eyes.

"He knows we're coming."

Zelgadis turned to her from where he was sparring with one of her generals. The slender man had the same lifeless look about him, but it wasn't because he had given up the light in his eyes for a goal. It was the sad, lost look of one who had no choice but to follow along behind destruction. His voice was a soft tenor, but the pain and anger it had to journey through made it hoarse and tense.

"How do you know?" He asked, turning away as the general brought down his dulled blade towards him to block it. "Another dream?"

"Yes."

"Ah." This was how they spoke. No one knew how they managed to convey so much using so little words…

Or maybe they didn't have to.

"Do we wait for him?"

Lina nodded. Her braid flopped over her shoulders as she moved, tendrils already pulling loose. "This will be the preliminary force. It will mostly be servants and noncombatants, trying to wear us down." She took a deep breath and steeled herself as the murmur of disgust ran through her army. Zelgadis saw a flash of heartache before it was covered with grim determination. "Fire at them with the crossbows. Give them no warning, they won't have the ability to countermand his orders. Expect mostly the young, old, or sick-- they're easier to control."

Oh Lina…

"If you show mercy, they won't be able to do the same to you. Think about it-- would you rather kill innocents, or die and not be there to defend the rest… leaving them remembering they destroyed their own chance at freedom?"

Do any of them know how much of yourself you're killing by saying this? Zelgadis mused as the crossbows were loaded and swords were brought up in wait. He sat down as the sun sank a little lower in the sky and waited the slaughter yet to come.

* * *

A horn sounded the approach of the first wave. Lina hardly had time to react and call the command to fire before she caught sight of them.

They weren't all the old and young from the city.

Some were from the palace itself. Lina's eyes widened in horror as she caught sight of bodies she recognized. They couldn't control their jerky movements, but they could see with unblinking eyes the fate ahead of them.

Don't think, just shoot.

Clicksving went her crossbow as a bolt was lodged into a young man who was only a child when she left.

Don't think.

Clicksving

Just shoot.

Clicksving.

Lina ignored the pained faces of the dead and dying, thinking only of the children she was going to save.

But she left the killing of the youngest to the rest of the army. She just…

I'm too weak to even try…

And leaving the guilt to them was wrong too... but she had enough just knowing she had ordered it.

At least they can fall back on the "it was orders" reason when they get too guilty. I can't.

Clicksving.

Clicksving.

Clicksving.

"Li...na…" Lina's eyes focused first on the long, blond, sunshine hair falling down the blue clad back, then the handsome face…

Then the trusting blue eyes.

"G--gourry--" She choked out, throat clenching down on the strangled name. She stared as he moved stiffly towards her.

"Kill me. P….please…" He rasped, trying to hold back the fingers that reached for the beltknife. "Before I k…kill…you…"

"I can't." She whispered, even as she aimed her crossbow. Her eyes stared unblinkingly as he moves closer, readying his weapon.

"Lina…" his eyes were full of pain, but Lina couldn't tear hers away. "Lina, I don't want to live knowing I killed you… my… queen…"

Lina closed her eyes tight. He stomach and mind roiled with unseen pain, and she made her choice.

Clicksving.

* * *

"Excellent, Xellos." Xellas Lounged on the couch, smiling at her favorite as he stood over the folding table. He flipped through maps and lists, paying little attention to the tigress sprawled upon the purple velvet and orange silk. "Victorious troops are careless troops. Your little ‘diversion’ was both detrimental to their minds and their caution." She grinned, watching Xellos ready spells and manpower through careful planning.

"Lina knows better. I taught her much better than that. She knows this is only the first wave, and she’ll be sure to tell the troops as well." He muttered. He looked like a wreck, eyes bloodshot and hands shaking. He had to be careful, had to do just enough and not too much; it had to be perfect. Absolutely perfect.

"The troops will not listen. You know how humans are. And the young ones, they would not believe they could be killed even if they knew these were only toys. Do not worry, Xellos, you shall win easily." She smiled. "They should be finished about now. Would you like to attack?"

Xellos let the liquid mane of hair slither back as he lifted his head, lips parting in a feral grin.

"By all means, my lady."

* * *