Anyway, these aliens were a hospitable sort, so offered EVA Shogouki some food. However, maybe they weren't quite as hospitable as they seemed when they food they gave her was some very old leftover fruit salad. Not wanting to complain, EVA Shogouki made herself a nice sandwich out of a slice of French bread, some butter, and the fruit salad. And all was well.

Thus screamed Toji for the umpteenth time. He was strapped to a hospital gurney in the back of a van driven by the aforementioned Misato. Also in the van was Gendo in shotgun, Ritsuko in the passenger seat behind him, Fuyutsuki in the driver's-side passenger seat, Kaworu in a seat behind Ritsuko, and myself in a seat behind Kaworu. Toji's bed took up the left two passenger seat spaces in Kaworu and my rows.

"Oh, quiet down," said Kaworu cheerfully. "You do know what they're going to do with you, don't you?"

"Probably gonna off you in one of those mountains ahead," I added, looking out the window up the road.

Toji quieted fearfully. "You mean... they're gonna give me wine?" Kaworu and I nodded solemnly. I guess we both interpreted "give me wine" as a colloquial expression meaning to kill someone in secret, like what was done in the old days by giving someone poisoned wine. Toji turned his head to the side, looking out his window. "But, what'd I ever do?"

I shrugged. "Worked for NERV, of course, plus had contact with Angels. You were an EVA pilot who was driven berserk by Angel influence, and both Kaworu and I were created from Angels." Ooo-kay, this leaves me with no clue whatsoever as to who my character is supposed to be, since I'm WAY too expressive and talkative to be Rei.

"They've been taking them all away," Kaworu explained. "Not being very efficient about it though," he added, pointing at the empty bench seat in the back of the van. "They could've brought along three more kids!" he observed cheerfully.

Suddenly, a giant brown pillbug-looking monster with long legs jumped out from the side of the road and attached itself to the top of the van. Gendo did some swerving (?? Since when was he driving? He and Misato had apparently switched places) and was able to knock the monster off, but one of its legs was still embedded in the side of the van.

"They'll be able to track you that way," Gendo informed us, referring to the monsters. "So don't get any ideas."

"Actually," Kaworu said, opening the sliding door on Toji's side of the vehicle, "they'll be able to track YOU." He looked at me and Toji and nodded, saying, "Shall we go for the mascara?" We both agreed and followed him out the door (I guess this was another colloquial expression, meaning... something. I have no idea ^_^*). In the meantime, the rest of the NERV crew in the van went Excel Saga-ish SD, and panicked as a bunch of monsters came after their van, and they drove off.

Now, the three of us conveniently ended up at a bar. Being the of-age 14 year-olds that we were, we wandered right in. We sat in the bar and talked about stuff, and somehow Shinji had joined us at this point. They were playing episodes of Evangelion in fast-forward on the TV's in the bar. Shinji informed us that leaving us in this town had been NERV's objective all along, and that it was full of people who had been in contact with Angels in some way or another.

We left the bar and wandered around the town we'd ended up in, amazed at just how many people were there (we're talking thousands). I put my arms behind my head and commented, "So, they're still gathering all of us in one place. Now they've just gotta off an entire town without seeming suspicious."

"An Angel attack," suggested Kaworu. "If the Angel doesn't destroy us, they'll just nuke the area and call us necessary casualties."

Shinji laughed nervously. "They're not actually gonna send an Angel after us, are they?"

No sooner had he spoke, an Angel came crashing down on top of the mall we were currently in. The angel was smaller than most of them, at only about 25 feet tall. It looked like a snow Daruma (the Japanese-style snowmen that are made of two snowballs instead of three), except had really long stick-like legs and arms, and was a light blue color. It also talked, and had a female voice (and, if memory serves, was wearing stick high-heels on its stick feet).

Some random person in the mall was wearing a skirt with a big smiley face on it. The Angel said, "Oooh, that's so cute! I want to BURN it!" And, so, it proceeded to burn down the mall.

We all escaped, with Shinji carrying Toji, and were trying to think of a way to defeat the Angel. There were a bunch of people in another building who were hurriedly trying to make back-up copies of all their MP3's from the computers there. This somehow sparked a brilliant idea, so I ran out to the parking lot and found one of my professors there. I asked him, "Since Angels and humans have almost the same genetic make-up, what musical note do people not like? Angels probably don't like it, either."

Without much thought, the prof said, "G."

And... gee. That's the end, because that's when I woke up. Will we defeat the snow Angel (??)? Will we figure out why NERV wants us all dead? Will we ever learn WHO the heck I was supposed to be?

Probably not. -_-*