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	===========Pokemon HAHAHAHAHA!===========
	===========By A-kun===========
	===========Chapter 11: Pokemon Wars Part 2===========
	Anything between * and * is translated Pokemon speech.
	Anything between [ and ] is thought

	Jessie looked at Giovanni nervously as he laid down the map of Saffron City.  She knew he wasn't the person she had met on Mt. Moon, but there was still a somewhat uncanny resembalance.
	"Okay, the important thing is to strike the most heavily defended places, that way, we'll weaken them heavily and reduce the effectiveness of any form of back-up.  This fake of me no doubt is attacking Saffron City for a reason and since they aren't battering down your doors, I'm figuring that it's probably the Silph Corporation's Headquarters that are stationed right in the center of the town.  Other than the Pokemon Gyms, Silph Co. would prove to be the toughest thing to take on." Giovanni answered.
	"The places they seem to be gathering are around the two Gyms, the entrances to the city and all of the Silph Co. buildings." Sabrina said.
	"We'll have to hit the nearest clusters.  Getting them out of action will allow us to gather more people." Giovanni declared.
	The group nodded.
	"After that, the attack team will split into three parts.  The strongest group will go down Main Street.  That's where the heaviest resistance will be.  The fake is no doubt going to make extra sure he can get away, or at the very least, allow him to fall back on Silph Co.  The second best will hit the far end of the city.  That's where the Pokemon Center is and it's best if we regain that quickly.  The nearest streets will have been dented by our early attack, so they shouldn't be very heavily defended." Giovanni reasoned.
	"Or they might be even more heavily defended because we're here." Yamcha said.
	"Indeed, but I think this imposter is going to put more value on being able to get their Pokemon restored." Giovanni answered.
	"True." Yamcha relented.
	"Our best bet for victory would be to lure a group of Rockets into an area where we could take them easily and not let anyone hear them.  Of course to prevent them from sounding any alarms, we'd have to dress up as them. Jessie, you've had the most experience handling the Rockets, so I'd like you, Ash and Brock to take out some Rockets to get their outfits." Giovanni said.
	"Fine." Jessie said, sweatdropping.
	Brock and Ash nodded in approval.
	"So, we'll keep training for now.  We'll have to attack soon, though.  The fake is going to demand some items that may end the world as we know them." Sabrina declared.
	"Right.  And, Ben, no more attempts at learning Agility." Jessie said, glaring at the tiny Eevee.
	"Hey!  Pikachu was just suggesting it.  How was I suppose to know I would unleash a Metronome?" Ben inquired.
	"That was Metronome?" Brock asked.
	"Well, that's my best guess.  With Pikachu's leg getting frozen and Ash's hand bursting into flames..." Ben responded.
	"Or it might be a new technique that only Eevees can learn." Brock hypothesized.
	"In any case, let's continue our training." Giovanni suggested.
	The group disapated quickly as everyone wanted to train as quickly as possible.  Ash thought for a moment, then decided to sneak out and catch another Pokemon.  Anything to get an advantage against Team Rocket.

	Ash kept a close eye on the target. A very close eye.  With only mild warning, Ash quickly threw the pokeball in his hand and it absorbed it's target.  Ash watched as the pokeball spun twice, then locked down.  Picking up the Pokeball, he turned and hurried back to the Fighting Dojo, a new Pokemon in his possession.

	Jessie stood behind her Pokemon and watched them practice against some of the Fighting Pokemon.
	"Shamrock, don't be so aggressive.  This is only practice.  Very good, Flare.  Hawk, try actually doing some attacks.  JESSY, STOP THAT!  You too, Mason!  This is practice, not mating season.  That's next month.  Pen-Pen, stop beating up that poor Mankey.  Just finish it off or let the trainer recall it." Jessie instructed.
	Yamcha was impressed.  Few people could keep track of so many Pokemon at once.  Well, without everything falling apart really quickly.  Then again, Ash seemed to training in a similiar fashion.  He was sending his Pokemon against both Shelly's and Misty's Pokemon.  And he was winning.
	Fox and Ben were over in the remedial training area as both had learned fighting techniques, but had not refined the techniques properly.  So, Ben was learning to Tackle properly and Fox was learning the proper way to perform the Fury Swipes.  Ben was still have the same problem as before.  He could launch the attack well-enough, but some fundamental weakness in his leap made his tackle less than effective.  Yamcha had seen some pathetic Tackles, but Ben was ranking really high on the Pathetic Scale.  Fox, on the other hand, was a very good study and learned the proper techniques extremely fast.  Heck, he was ready to do some major training.
	"Fox, why don't you go train with some Primeapes, I need to talk with Ben for a while." Yamcha said.
	Fox nodded and nearly flew to the practice area in anticipation.  Yamcha sat down next to Ben's prone form.  Ben had nearly clocked himself silly with his last attempt at Tackle.  Luckily, he had learned a defensive manuever called "Duck" that saved him from getting K.O.ed by the bag he had struck.
	"You're not doing too well with Tackle.  Why do you insist on learning it?" Yamcha asked, stopping the punching bag that was swinging over Ben's head.
	"Because virtually every other creature knows it!" Ben responded.
	"Not all of them.  All the flying pokemon don't.  Most Fighting Pokemon don't.  A lot of Fire Pokemon don't." Yamcha replied.
	"That's because they don't have the need for it.  I mean, doing Tackle in the air would be just plain stupid and the others can defend themselves with what they know." Ben responded.
	"Well, not every pokemon needs Tackle anyway.  I mean, Quick Attack can be just as effective, if not more so." Yamcha responded.
	"I need Tackle to learn Take Down.  Without the strongest attack in my body's arsenal, I'll be a sitting duck against any tougher Pokemon." Ben responded.
	"Why not just Evolve then?" Yamcha asked.
	Ben looked at Yamcha, then shook his head.
	"No.  I'll learn Tackle and Take Down before I even consider evolving." Ben responded hotly.
	Yamcha blinked.  No, Ben couldn't have just let out a puff of flame, could he?  Yamcha shook his head and decided he was getting too old for this crap.  He was beginning to hallucinate that Pokemon were don't things they shouldn't be able to.
	"Well, then at least try and think of someone you hate." Yamcha commented, standing back up.
	Ben nodded and backed up. After a moment of intense concentration, he leapt at the punching bag... *WHUMP**WHOOSH**SWOOSH**KAPOW*
	Ben was sent flying into the meditation room.
	"That one was great!" Yamcha called.
	"Owie..." Ben responded.
	Ash blinked.  Shelly blinked.  Misty blinked.  Piakchu wobbled.  Zappy was laying unconcious, the victim of Pikachu's new technique.
	"I've never seen a pokemon roll up into a ball, spin a really fast speeds without moving an inch then shoot forward like a cannonball before." Misty commented.
	"I'm not even sure what to call that." Ash added.
	"*Uuuggghhhh....*" Pikachu moaned before collapsing.

	Yamcha looked down Ben, arched an eyebrow and asked, "Combo moves?"
	"Yeah.  We're not going to be fighting by League Rules, so why not develop some tag-team attacks?" Ben asked.
	"Little one, methinks you hit your tiny head a little too hard." Yamcha suggested.
	"Maybe, but this isn't something we should just ignore." Giovanni suggested as he approached.
	"You think we could really develop combination attacks in one day?" Yamcha inquired.
	"Perhaps if we tried.  Neither the Fighting or the Psychic Gyms have that great of a variety of attacks.  Combination techniques might just give us the extra edge we need.  Every little bit helps." Giovanni answered.

	That night, Jessie found herself crouched behind a pair of bushes opposite of Ash and Brock, who were also hiding behind bushes.  Jessie watched the two Team Rocket members closely as Ash and Brock shook the bush in front them.
	According to the plan, they were to take these two guys out as quickly as possible.  Jessie had to have the element of surprise because the Rocket members wouldn't go down as easily if they saw it coming.  And compromises were NOT allowed.
	As both of the idiots...er, targets turned their backs to her, she leapt forth and smacked both on the back of their heads.  They collapsed, twitching.  Ash and Brock hurried out of the bushes and over to Jessie.  The trio grabbed the fallen Rockets and pulled them into the bushes and back to the gym.
	Six more repeats of the same tactic and they had plenty of outfits... that would fit no one.  Giovanni and Jessie looked at the outfits, then at the people they had removed them from.  All of them were too scrawny for the Karate Dojo Members, but too muscular for most of the Psychic Dojo Members.
	Only Giovanni, Brock, Jessie, Ash and Misty were able to get decent fits, after some 'alterations' thanks to Sabrina.  Sabrina could've gotten into a Rocket uniform too, but she decided her Gym members were still in too much need of her help for her to leave.  Shelly probably would've gone too, but she was asleep.  Even a bucket of ice-cold water had failed wake her.
	Brock was squirming in his outfit.  The chest was too narrow for him.  It was like all of the Rockets were virtually beanpoles.
	"Okay, now that we've got outfits and we know where we're going to ambush them, we need convincing story..." Giovanni said.

	As a fairly moderate gathering of Rocket Members converged on the street leading to the Pokemon Gyms, Jessie and Giovanni burst from the bushes wearing their Team Rocket outfits.
	"HELP!  THERE'S AN ENTIRE TRIBE OF MACHOKES ON A RAMPAGE!" Jessie cried.
	"Really?!  Where!?" a Rocket member asked, totally duped.
	"Behind that house!" Giovanni puffed, pointing to a nearby house.
	Half of the gathering hurried over and began following Giovanni and Jessie behind the house.  Those that remained were struck by a collective Psybeam by the entire Psychic Gym Members and their Psychic Pokemon.  They squeaked and collapsed.  Those that followed Jessie and Giovanni only found the entire Fighting Gym members.  They were swiftly beaten up.

===============================================================================================

	The Battle For Saffron City Begins At Last!
	Pokemon Versus Pokemon In A Knock-Down, Drag-Out, Bite-Their-Ankles Battle To The Finish!
	All Coming To You In Pokemon HAHAHAHAHA! Part 12!

	Ben McCrillis 
	Comment, Flames, etc. can go to - akun15@hotmail.com
	Visit A-kun's Webpage at - http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Island/3968/index.html
	Visit A-kun's Pokemon webpage at - http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Island/3968/pokemon/pokemon.html


	======
	OMAKE! - No Filth This Time! (depending on your definition)
	======

	"We'll have to hit the nearest clusters.  Getting them out of action will allow us to gather more people." Giovanni declared.
	The group nodded.
	"The key to Saffron City has always been Main Street.  The Romans knew it.  Napoleon knew it.  And now you all know it.  Now, what about ammunition?" Giovanni said.
	"Seventy-eight thousand water balloons, sir.  Is it okay if they say 'Happy Birthday'?" Ash asked.
	"D'ooooh!  I'd rather they say 'Death From Above' or 'Squeal Like A Pig', but I guess we'll have to make do." Giovanni grumbled.
	(The Previous Omake was altered to be a lot like an early Simpsons cartoon)

	From Episode 6!
	"Now what?  How do we get down?" Jessie asked Fox as they looked down the cliff-face.
	"Climb down, I guess.  I've got some rope." Ben said, setting his backpack down.
	Suddenly, the wind began picking up and seemed to be pushing him towards the cliff-face.  He tried to set his footing, but the wind picked him up like a pair of arms and tossed him off the cliff.
	"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh--" Ben cried.
	"BEN!" Jessie called as she looked down to see...
	Jessie winced.
	"Um, someone call the director...  We've got a little... problem." Jessie said.
	A-kun walked over.
	"Like what?" A-kun inquired.
	"Um, we may have to choose another kid to be Ben." Jessie said, motioning over the cliff.
	A-kun glanced and winced.
	"Bleah.  There goes my appetite.  Which really sucks because the caterers are serving oysters." A-kun grumbled.
	Jessie turned pale green.

	"I'm fine!  Just use Shamrock's Vine Whip to haul me up." Ben yelled, throwing his belt with his pokeballs on it to Jessie.
	Jessie reached down and just barely managed to snag the belt.
	"Right.... which one is Shamrock?" Jessie asked, pulling the belt up.
	"The only blue one!" Ben called.
	Jessie grabbed the blue pokeball and let loose...
	"Psyduck?  How the hell did you get THAT?" Jessie asked.
	"I'm wondering that myself." Ben replied.
	"PROPS!" A-kun yelled.

	Shelly blinked.
	"Zappy wants Pikachu's hand?  That's rather mean, but I don't see why..." Shelly began.
	"Zappy wants Pikachu's hand in MARRIAGE.  Zappy wants to marry Pikachu." Misty answered.
	"Oh.  So?" Shelly asked.
	Ash and Misty realized they were worried about nothing.  In a few days, the first female-female Pokemon wedding was seen worldwide.  Later on, the Gay Pokemon Activists had rallies and eventually, it was accepted worldwide that such things happened.  Of course, this brought forth the Pokemon Lovers Activists, who were a really sick and twisted bunch of weirdos.

	His entire body felt like a giant puppy had grabbed him like a rag doll and shook the stuffing out of him before gnawing on him for an hour and a half.
	"PokeGod.  God.  Poke.  God PokeGod." came an unfamiliar voice.
	Ben managed to open his right eye slightly.  His left eye felt like something wet was running over it, so he decided not to chance opening it.  What he saw almost made him yelp.  It was Agatha and she wanted to get freaky with him.
	"AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!" Ben yelled, drawing a pistol and firing repeatedly.

	Ben managed to open his right eye slightly.  His left eye felt like something wet was running over it, so he decided not to chance opening it.  What he saw almost made him yelp.  It was a wiry creature that had a Rhyhorn's hind legs, Rapidash's fore legs, a Pikachu's tail, a pair of arms that ended in claws like a Scyther's, then another pair of arms resembling a Charizard's.  It's entire torso was plated like a Golem's and it's face resembled an Abra's.
	"Poke PokeGod God God Poke." the strange creature declared.
	"You're one ugly mother." Ben growled.
	"You're no prize yourself." the strange creature retorted.

	From Pokemon HAHAHAHAHA! Part 1!
	Ash awoke to his alarm clock and shot upright.  He spun around and grinned.  3 AM.  Who else was going to go this early?  Ash actually patted himself on the back as he tossed on his clothes and ran to the laboratory.  Just in time to see that a massive gathering of Metallica fans camped outside of the window.
	"DAMN!" Ash growled.

	"Now, Ash, I should warn you that this female Pikachu is extremely powerful.  Try not to offend it." Professor Oak said.
	"Oh, don't worry, Professor Oak." Ash answered, pulling a poke-a-treat out of his pocket and offering it to the Pikachu.
	"Pikachu!" Pikachu said, smiling as it accepted the treat and ate it quickly.
	"Hi, Pikachu, my name is Ash.  Would you like to be friends?" Ash asked, squating somewhat to get eye-to-eye with the pokemon.
	"Pikachu!" Pikachu answered.
	Ash smiled. *GLOMP*
	"That was the other thing.  It's very perverted as well.  Thankfully I'm not it's type.  Unfortunately, you are." Professor Oak added.
	"NOW you tell me." Ash sighed.

	From Part 2!
	When they arrived at the Pokemon Center, Ash found himself astounded.  There had never been a building as large as the Center in his home town, unless you counted the school, which Ash didn't.
	"Are you sure you want to go in?  They might not like being annoyed by people who actually have nothing to do." Misty said.
	"I do too have something to do in here.  Pidgey and Pikachu need a check-up every two months and I don't want my pokemon passing out or fainting because of a silly flu that could have been avoided." Ash answered.
	"Now that you mention it, I guess I should have my pokemon checked too." Misty said.
	Pikachu turns to you, the reader.
	"Don't forget to have your trainer deloused and shaved quarterly!" Pikachu said, smiling strangely.