Cat Love

Part 1

A Ranma ½ Fanfiction

“Help me!!!”

Cologne heard a scream of panic from outside the restaurant. She looked outside and saw a very scared Ryoga, whose clothes were in tatters and rags, being chased by a Ranma-chan…who obviously was in the Neko-ken. As she saw the girl-boy chase down Ryoga, she noticed that Ranma wasn’t attacking Ryoga outright. It was rather..odd.

Ryoga saw the Cat Café and quickly ran inside. Fortunately it was closed for the day. Ryoga grabbed a table and threw it at Ranma. Ranma-neko swiped her claws and the table fell to shreds. Ryoga looked around, panicking. “She’s going to kill me. HELP!!”

Suddenly Shampoo came into the room and saw Ranma-neko approaching the quivering Ryoga. “Husband kill pig-boy?” She was rather confused about what Ranma-neko was doing.

Ranma-neko looked up and snarled. Another female was intruding on her and her mate. She would have to battle the other female for the male. She started advancing on Shampoo, intent on winning the battle.

Shampoo saw Ranma-neko approaching her and swore in Chinese. That look in her eyes was not one of affection. She saw Ranma-neko leap at her and Shampoo hunched herself into a shivering ball. Then she felt nothing, nothing at all.

She opened her eyes and saw her great-grandmother standing over a sleeping Ranma.

Cologne sighed. “Shampoo, check on Ryoga. I must contact Doctor Tofu at once.” She left the room, leaving a very confused Shampoo and Ryoga behind.

Shampoo pulled Ryoga to his feet. “What pig-boy do to airen?”

“I didn’t do anything.” Ryoga protested, brushing off his clothes. “She attacked me first. I was just …” He stopped talking when Tofu came in followed by Cologne.

Doctor Tofu picked up Ranma-chan and put her on a table. Then he looked at Cologne expectantly. “So what happened now?”

Cologne hesitated briefly. “You know about the Neko-ken and that Ranma was trained in that technique?”

He nodded. “Yes, and it left him extremely phobic about cats. And constant contact with a cat causes his mind to snap and he thinks that he is a cat.”

Cologne settled herself on her staff calmly but inside she was feeling depressed. “In his cat mode, he thinks Akane is his mate and he will allow her to control him. But that has changed.”

Shampoo looked up hopefully. “Airen no like pervert-girl anymore?”

Cologne stifled a laugh. Shampoo was so one-tracked in her thinking. “NO, his male side still refers to Akane as his mate but his female side is another story.”

Ryoga had a sinking feeling in his stomach. “What about his female side?”

“Obviously, a female cat thinks differently from a male cat, and they have different requirements. Obviously two females cannot produce a child, therefore why should a female cat have another female as a mate? Therefore a female cat will seek out a male as a mate.”

“Ranma’s female cat side will think Akane as a threat to her and her mate, so Akane should avoid the female cat mode.” Cologne pointed out. “In fact, she will view any female of child bearing age as a threat. I am a threat only because I have beaten Ranma and can do so again. But only with great difficulty if he is in cat-mode.”

Ryoga was slightly interested but asked, “What does this have to do with me?”

Cologne had a evil grin on her face. “A female cat looks for certain qualities in a mate: speed, strength, power. All excellent traits for offspring that can adapt and survive. But a female cat will only mate with a male who has proven that he can beat her. Who is the only male around Nerima who has beaten or come close to beating Ranma? Without using magic or anything like that.”

“Me.. but..WHAT!!!” Ryoga’s eyes bulged out in disbelief. “She… no he….thinks that I am her mate?”

Tofu stifled a laugh. “You must admit that the situation is rather funny.”

Ranma neko suddenly woke up. She eyed Cologne and Shampoo carefully. They might be after her mate, but there was her danger sense was not detecting any problems. Then she examined Doctor Tofu. A powerful male, perhaps, but he was nothing in comparison to her mate. Ranma-neko smiled and jumped into her mate’s lap.

Ryoga eyed Ranma-neko like a nuclear bomb ready to go off.

But Tofu reassured him that she wouldn’t kill him. “She might bat you around like a kitten, but that’s it. But if you try to assure your dominance over her, she will fight you. And another thing… she might try to mate with you..”

Ryoga promptly fainted.

Sometime later, Ryoga woke up. He sat up and saw Ranma-neko peering curiously at him. In the back of his mind, he acknowledged that she was kind of cute. Especially her big blue eyes looking expectantly into his, and her lovely red hair…. His train of thought suddenly stopped.

Tofu bit his lower lip, deep in thought. “I don’t think that we should tell anyone else at this time. Especially not Ranma himself.”

Ryoga shrieked. “WHY NOT?”

“You know about the promise his father made to his mother: if he is not a man among men, he must commit seppuku. It’s bad enough that he turns into a girl. What will happen if Ranma realizes that his female side has fallen for a guy?”

Ryoga thought then smiled. “He would kill himself?” Then Akane would be free to date, he started to snicker. Then Cologne hit him over the head with her staff.

“I do not want a dead son-in-law. If I find out that you tell anyone, I will be selling ramen with pork. Do I make myself clear?” Cologne threatened.

Ryoga eagerly nodded his head. Ranma-neko licked him on the mouth. Ryoga yelled, “Change her..him back now!” Ryoga threw Ranma-neko across the room.

Cologne dumped a bucket of hot water on Ranma-neko. Ranma-kun opened his eyes and found himself in the Cat Café, in a corner. Ryoga looked like hell and Shampoo was holding her bonbori like her life depended on it. Doctor Tofu was also there, looking at Ranma cautiously.

Ranma eyed everyone in the room carefully. “What’s wrong?”

Ryoga let out a sigh of relief. Ranma was back to normal.

Cologne bounced over to Ranma. “You went into the Neko-ken and attacked Ryoga. We stopped you from destroying the restaurant while trying to kill him.”

“Oh.” Ranma turned to Ryoga. “Sorry about that. If I could remember what happened…” He shrugged. “Better get going now. Uh, thanks.” He ran out of the restaurant.

Ranma jumped onto the fence and walked towards the dojo. He was worried about what happened. He usually didn’t attack people in cat mode unless he was threatened. But if Ryoga had attacked him, his cat side would have given no quarter. And Ryoga wasn’t hurt that badly.