The Trippin' Time-Travels of Hesarius
translated by:  Powerhaus

358 Year of the Bronze Wyvern, Month of Akroeg the Ram, Day 2: Today was a day stranger than strange. Weirder than weird. What I am about to say in this entry will be a total shock because anyone else reading this will think I am insane. Earlier 2 days ago, I was visiting the warrior mage guild in Ratha. Of course, Tyrsan said I wasn't ready for the next rank. I simply shrugged and thanked him. He then flatly replied "No problem." So I took the lifts back down to the first tier to await my ride back to Aesry. That was when it happened. Suddenly the clouds gathered and grew darker. Multicolored lighning streaked down from the skies. Everyone ran in a panic for shelter, except me. I was entirely fascinated by this because it looked like an opportunity to learn a new form of magic because all of this wasn't natural. Then something materialized right in front of me. It was a spherical shape of energy surrounded by a few rings. This was definitely magic, no magic I have ever seen before. It hovered there for about 5 rosaen before disappearing along with the dark clouds and the multicolored lightning. In it's place, there was a young lady lying down unconscious. I kneeled down to examine her. She looked very familiar. As soon as I touched her, she slowly regained consciousness. "Are you alright?" I asked. She nodded then asked me a very strange question. She asked me for the time! As soon as I told her the time and the date and year and all, she suddenly cried out "Yes! It worked! The spell worked!" I frowned at her. I did not know what she was talking about. Spell? What spell could achieve this. What she asked me next was equally strange. "Do you know a warrior mage named Hesarius Xeralion?" I acknowledged to her that I was he. Then she suddenly hugged me and cried "Father! I have found you at last!" I pushed her off of me and asked her to explain herself. She said her name was Braydin and that she was the daughter of me and Braydyn. I was shocked. If Braydyn and I did have a child, she would still be a toddler! Then she explained to me that she was actually from 20 years in the future, the year 377! She explained to me she found a spell in an ancient tome which allowed a person to travel back into the past. But because of the strange magic I saw, I had no choice but to believe her. She told me she came from the future to meet me. I asked her why she couldn't meet me in 377. She told me that I had disappeared 10 years prior. She looked in the country of Nova Utopia to find me. But everyone there told her that I had disappeared after the Gorbesh Wars. It was assumed I was dead even though my body was never found. She also told me that her mother Braydyn died 18 years in the future from disease. In her dying breath, she revealed to Braydin that I was her father. From Braydin, I learned some things about the future. It seemed the nation that I made it my goal to create was a definite reality! But unfortunately, Braydin had a dilemma. The spell she used to travel here could only be used once. So she was trapped forever in this time. I spent the whole day talking with her. I have her sleeping at the local Aesry Inn. This is strange, definitely strange. Now instead of 4 daughters, I now have 5. But I will treat her with the same love that I have given my other daughters.

Translation:
I'm a big homo and noone loves me, i'm a loser, i think i'm good but i'm not so i make up stories about non-existant relatives and the only real relatives i have i have sex with. I used to get wet dreams about fucking my mother and i made my ex-fiance my sister just so it made more sense to touch myself in impure ways while i spied on her and her lovers.  I love goats, once i had sex with a goat for like 40 minutes, normally i can only last 15 or so, but i don't know, it was a good day i guess, i thanked the gods for an hour til i returned to sticking it to the goat. Ok i lie, i'm really a 46 year old in the closet homosexual, my mother refuses to talk to me since i grabbed her breasts last thanksgiving, my father kicked me out of the house last month, and my dog's legs and thighs are too old and worn to take it anymore.  I spend about 2-3 hours a day playing pocket pool with myself while complimenting myself on having inadequate cyber-sex with 12 year olds, one day i wish to be with the one known as Stryffe.  My clothes don't fit anymore, i never change because i just grew so fat in them one day they got lodged under my man-boobs.  I tell people i'm a writer and make some excuse to make them pity me, I need attention or i just might have to turn on the TV and face reality.