The following are not directed toward anyone that I know, unless you're one of those annoying people, then yes, this is for you.
You're so ugly, when you were born, the docta slapped ya momma, and put tinted windows on the incubator.
You so po' you can't afford the other "o" and "r."
You're so cheap, you can squeeze a dollar bill
until the eagle screams.
You're so musty that when you put on Secret, it told on you.