This Text file is old! In a 🏛️Museum, an unsorted archive of (user-)pages. (Saved from Geocities in Oct-2009. The archival story: oocities.org)
--------------------------------------- (To 🚫report any bad content: archivehelp @ gmail.com)

Samurai Pizza Cats Onslaught
Original fics by: Koopa
MSTing by: M.H. Torringjan

	Well, it's been a long time since I've done a Koopa fic, so I decided to 
go ahead and have some fun.  When I looked at them again, I realized that most 
of them aren't very long, so I thought, "Hey!  I'll just take a bunch of them 
and compact them into one MSTing!  It'll be fun!"  Well, maybe not fun, but 
interesting.  Well, maybe not interesting, but...  Okay, so it's something to do 
between college projects.  Sue me.  On second thought, don't.  I don't have 
anything for you to take.
	As usual, this isn't meant as an insult to Koopa, or his fics.  I don't 
own SPC.  I don't own Pokemon.  I don't own MST3K.  I don't own any of the other 
products or services mentioned in this fic.  Their respective owners own them.  
Michelle, however, is my idea.  If you want to borrow her, ask.  Granted, it 
probably won't happen, but one never knows.

In the not-too distant future,
Next Sunday A.D.
There were some bitchin' trainers,
Pokemon trainers to you and me.
They wandered 'round the world to become the best,
Trying to beat out all the rest,
They did well for a while,
But then they lost one little battle
And were shot into space
(Ash: Pi-ka-chuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!)
We'll send them crapy fanfics,
The worst we can find(la, la, la!)
They'll have to sit and watch them all
And we'll monitor their minds.(la, la, la!)
Now keep in mind Ash can't control when the fanfics begin and end
He'll try to keep his sanity with the help of his trainer friends!

(Poke roll call!)

Cambot!
(We're on!)

Misty!
(Splish, splash!)

Michelle!
(I'm not a trainer)

Broooooock!
(Hentai baka!)

If you're wondering how they eat and breathe and other science facts,
Just repeat to yourself, "It's just a fanfic
I should really just relax!"
For Mystery Pokemon Theatre 3000!(TWAAAANG!)

Reverse door sequence

	The scene opens to a computer.  Michelle walks on the bridge to find Ash 
sitting at the computer.
	"What you doing?" she asks him.
	His eyes are bloodshot and have black rings underneath them.  "I'm just 
playing a bit of SimUniverse," he replies.  "I've finally gotten my population 
levels up to a google, and my evolutionary level has just hit nanotech!"
	"Oh, great," she says to herself.  Brock comes in from his bedroom, eating 
a pickle.  "Brock, I think we've got a problem.  Ash seems to be addicted to 
those Sim games."
	"Oh, nonsense!" Brock replies, calmly.  He approaches Ash.  "So, Ash, how 
long have you been playing the game today?"
	"Only thirty hours," Ash replies.
	"Did you stop for bathroom breaks?" Brock asks.
	"Yes, but I took the computer with me," Ash replies.  "This thing isn't 
that heavy after a couple of trips back and forth!"
	"I didn't know the power cord was that long!" Brock exclaims.  "And have 
you eaten?"
	"Yeah, but after the first time, I moved the fridge in here so I wouldn't 
have to move to get to it," Ash replies.
	"Well, that would explain why it's sitting next to him," Brock comments to 
Michelle.  "And would you be willing to stop for a bit?"
	"Not if my LIFE depended on it!" Ash exclaims, wrapping his arms around 
the monitor, covering the power button with his tongue to prevent shutting down, 
and putting his foot on the power cord, to keep it in the wall.
	"Okay, so we have a problem..." Brock comments as he goes to retrieve 
Misty.  "Maybe Misty can help us out with this," Brock comments.  A few moments 
later, he returns with Misty in tow.
	"What's going on?" she asks.
	"Ash has fallen under the siren song of the Sim games," Michelle replies.  
"Any idea on how to get him out?"
	"Sorry, can't help you," Misty replies.
	"If he doesn't snap out of it, I call dibs on his Pokemon," Brock 
exclaims.  "You know, we still haven't done our trade-back yet.  And as much as 
I enjoy Pikachu, I want my Pokemon back."
	"Oh, shut up!  We'll pull him out of it somehow!  We always do, don't we?" 
Misty exclaims, slapping Brock.
	"Look out, you two, the Mads are calling!" Michelle says as she presses 
the flashing red button.

Deep 151

	"What seems to be the problem, my little Spinarak herders?" Jesse asks as 
the channel opens between the two places.

	"Well, Ash has gotten addicted to the product of our last invention," 
Michelle replies.  "We should have known that there would be some major side 
effects."

	"Well, we should be able to help you out with this one easily!" Jesse 
says, pressing a button.  The sound of Ash screaming as an electric shock flows 
through his body and the computer can be heard from the Satellite.  "Well, that 
should solve the problem for you."  Deep 151 is filled with people at tables, 
counting pieces of paper.

	"What's going on down there?" Ash asks weakly.

	"Well, we've got a grand project going on down here involving a couple of 
different elections!" James explains.  "First of all, remember that vote that 
took place a while back on the SoL between Torgo and Ortega?  Well, apparently, 
the vote on that has been called back, and we've got a recount situation here, 
too.  When Mr. Ortega saw Gore manipulating the system, he thought that it might 
do him some good.  So, we've got a crack team down here, consisting of 
Heidegger, TV's Frank, Iron Chef Italian Masahiko Kobe, Solt, Peppor, and 
Megaweapon recounting all of our votes."

	"And what's that table in the back where Bigfoot's sitting?" Michelle 
asks.

	"That's the lost votes from the Florida polls," James comments.  "Nothing 
really important.  But, you may find it interesting that, the real votes went so 
that Bush won with 88% of the popular vote, and swept the Electoral College.  
Our friends in the media are just doing this to get some publicity."

	"No!  It can't be true!" Misty exclaims.

	"It is, now shut up and get on with your invention exchange!" Jesse 
exclaims.

	As Misty tends to Ash some more, Michelle begins.  "Well, today, our 
invention is based on the premise that people in other cars can't see what 
you're thinking or what you're saying.  We've invented the first combination 
windshield and billboard, the window message board!"  Brock drives in front of 
Cambot in a red Dodge Viper.  "Say you're driving down the road in a caravan 
formation with your Boy Scout troop or something while, all of a sudden, your 
back seat chimes up with a chorus of 'I have to go to the bathroom!' and 'I'm 
thirsty/hungry!'  Well, you have your trusty cellular phone along with you, and 
vow to hit the next person who screams in your ear with it.  Unfortunately, you 
can't call the other cars in the caravan to get them to stop, since your cell-
phone's batteries are dead.  This is where the invention comes into the picture!   
Just type in the desired message, direct the message to a certain window and 
press enter!"  The message, "Take the next exit" scrolls across the window in 
large, friendly yellow letters.
	"Michelle?  Am I supposed to be able to see out of here?" Brock asks.
	"Yes.  Why?" Michelle asks nervously.
	"Well, I can't," Brock replies.
	"We'll worry about it later," Michelle says.  "As an added feature, we 
have pre-programmed some helpful phrases into it, such as, 'I love you,' 'thank 
you,' and 'bite me!' for the rude Sunday drivers!  What do you think?"

	"Not bad!" Jesse comments as James retrieves their invention.  "Our fanfic 
today is a major advancement in the field of mad science, as far as we're 
concerned.  Today, we shall unveil the Fanfic generator!"

	"Real original name," Misty says from the Satellite.
	"Hasn't someone already done that?" Brock asks.

	"SILENCE!" Jesse yells for no apparent reason.  "Our invention works on a 
fairly simple premise.  The Internet doesn't have enough fanfic authors to go 
around for all of the Mad Scientists in the world today.  We're drying up our 
resources quickly, so this machine of ours will help us immensely!  One must 
simply type in any random anime series or movie, say, Gundam Wing, and any 
object which we can think of.  At this point, the story acts as a madlib 
machine, inserting the two wherever appropriate.  Take, for instance, this short 
excerpt from this story done earlier by Meowth.

"In the silence of the night, Yuri could hear the kumquat.  Its breath was as 
delicious as a pile of herrings.  Kei was not far from the Chuck E. Cheeze's, 
sleeping alongside a 2000-pound water buffalo.  Its breath was cold against her 
Canon BJC-6000 color printer.  She couldn't help but feel that Slim [the 
buffalo] wasn't telling her something.  Maybe her meat helmet was too 
transformed for his liking.  Or was it her B.O.?"

	"It has all the makings of a bad story, only lacking the bad spelling and 
grammar.  And, if you purchase today within the next fifteen minutes, you'll 
receive, free of pay, the upgrade software to produce some of the most stupid 
grammar mistakes and spelling errors known to man!  Otherwise, the cost for this 
upgrade is twenty dollars more!"
	Meowth chimes in his contribution to the invention exchange.  "Plus, it 
tags them with original author titles, like Mike Rhea and Oscar!  Hey, James, 
have you ever heard of this one?  'Adam Chris Leigh?'"
	Jesse slaps Meowth and says to the Satellite, "This weeks experiment is a 
bunch of little rays of sunlight from our old friend, Koopa!  I don't think that 
you've ever done one of these here, so here you go!  Enjoy!  Push the button, 
James!"
	"Ma'am!" Kobe calls.  Jesse goes to him.  "Who is this one voting for?"
	"It's a write-in for Ralph Nader," Jesse replies, looking at the ballot.  
"Toss it out."  The empty trash can receives the balled-up ballot.

	"You know, this game looks fun!" Misty says, looking at the computer 
screen.  Brock pulls Misty away from the screen as Fanfic sign goes off.

Door 6: A solid wall.  A short, gray guy points at it to make a hole in it.

Door 5: A chest of drawers. You open the top drawer and climb down into it.

Door 4: The barrel of a cannon.  You climb down it.

Door 3: A wall of fire.  You get Squirtle to put it out.

Door 2: A large hand.  All of the fingers fold into a fist to punch through door 
	1.5 (the sheet of paper)

Door 1: A vault door.  You turn the handle and it swings open easily.

	"So, Koopa, then.  He's got some short stuff, from what I've read of some 
stuff from the other Satellite," Ash says.
	"Hey, how'd you get better so quickly?" Brock asks.
	"I think there's something in the door sequence," Ash replies.

>Lost Food

Ash: The story of Carrie the carrot and Tommy the tomato as they wander 
aimlessly through the forest...
Michelle: Called a "wonderful romp through the imagination" by the New York 
Times!
Brock: Isn't everything?

>This story is only fanfiction and has no impact on the Samuri Pizza Cats show 
>or any of the episodes. This was written by Koopa. 

Misty: (Koopa)I'm really just screwing with your heads here.

>A new bread of bugs have made their way to little Tokyo.

Ash: Wow, I haven't seen that recipe on Food Network!
Michelle: Quick, call Terminex!

>These bugs eat crops at a very fast rate.  
>The bugs get to the crops of Little Tokyo and start eating them until they are 
>all gone.

Brock: Well, except for Brussels sprouts.  No one likes those...

>Little 
>Tokyo has very little food left.

Michelle: (Francine) I can't stand it, I'm so hungry!  We'll have to eat 
someone!
Ash: (Guido) Francine, we haven't eaten for ten minutes.
Misty: (Polly) Speedy, we may not make it out of this alive, and I've never 
really been with a man...

>Al Dente calls in the Pizza Cats to help. Al says there is a crop 
>duster that lives a long way away from little Tokyo that has a chemical that 
>will kill the bugs and save the crops.

Michelle: (Al) Yeah, I just don't want to get up and actually do something 
myself.  Hell, I'm wasting enough time calling these guys as is.  I'm not even 
going to call the crop-duster myself.  I haven't eaten for ten minutes, I don't 
want to do anything...

>Jerry over hears this and he tells the Big Cheese of this. The Big Cheese 
>doesn't want the bugs gone because he was planing

Brock: (Jerry) Big Cheese, what made you want to take up carpentry?
Ash: (Big Cheese) I was told that I had an incredibly wooden performance in my 
last play!
Rest: *groan!*

>to by food from other parts 
>of the world and sell them to the people of little Tokyo at a way larger price 
>than what he bought them for.

Michelle: (Mr. Rogers) And, children, this is what we call "extortion"!  Can you 
say "extortion?"
Rest: "Extinction!"
Michelle: Close enough...

>He orders Bad Bird to intercept the Pizza Cats and stop them from getting to 
>the crop duster.

Brock: Russel P. Casse at your service, everyone!
Misty: Gah!  "Independence Day" flashbacks...!

>As Bad Bird leaves he sees that the Pizza Cats already have a 
>huge lead since they left earlier.

Ash: And as the Bad Bird saw that he had slept too long, the slow but steady 
Pizza Cats went ahead and won the race!  The lesson?
Brock: Don't try crossing over with Aesop.

>Bad Bird takes 4 other ninja crows with him. 

Misty: Only four?
Brock: Well, they did have... and they were really...  Okay, so I don't know 
where this one's going!
Michelle: (Bad Bird) Well, we've been throwing hordes of these guys at them for 
years!  They've got to be tired by now!

>Just as the Pizza Cats are about there Bad Bird catches up with them. Bad Bird 
>orders the 4 ninja crows to attack the pizza cats.

Michelle: (Ninja Crow) Sir, have you really thought this through?  Shouldn't we 
kind of have some sort of plan for this?
Misty: (Bad Bird) Plan, shman!  Kill the bastards!

>Polly punches the lights out 
>of 2 of them. Speedy whacks one on the back. Guido trips the last one.

Ash: (Speedy) There.  Done and done!
Misty: Well, this story is going nowhere real fast...

>Bad Bid 
>gets really Mad and he lunges at Speedy.

Brock: (Bad Bird) Hold me, my love!
Michelle: (Speedy) Bad Bird!
Brock: (Bad Bird) Speedy!
Michelle: (Speedy) Bad Bird!
Brock: (Bad Bird) Speedy!
Michelle: (Speedy) Bad Bird!
Brock: (Bad Bird) Speedy!
Ash: (Janet) Dr. Scott!
Misty: That's enough of that, I think.

>Speedy takes out his sword and he and 
>Bad Bird do battle.

Misty: ...And Speedy did open up a big, frothy can of whoop-ass on his enemy, by 
his graces.  And lo, it was good...

>Polly and Guido cheer on Speedy.

Ash and Michelle: (Guido and Polly) Speedy!
Brock: (Speedy) Guys!
Ash and Michelle: (Guido and Polly) Speedy!
Brock: (Speedy) Guys!
Ash and Michelle: (Guido and Polly) Speedy!
Brock: (Speedy) Guys!
Misty: Will you guys stop that?!
Michelle: (Speedy) Sure guys, don't help me or anything!  I'll just fight for my 
life here.  On my own.

>Bad Bird's Sword gets hit 
>once to many times and it breaks.

Brock: (Bad Bird) Why must they laugh at my mighty-
Michelle: Stop right there, my good man!

>Speedy then brings out his 2ed sword

Ash: Wow!  He's got two-
Michelle: You stop, too!

>and does 
>his Cats eye slash (If it's named something else then tell me.)

Misty: It's actually named "the Magical Swinging Sword Beam of Happiness and 
Prosperity with a Pinch of Salt."

>The shot heads 
>for Bad Bird. Bad Bird runs as the shot travels behind him.

Brock: Two words: Side step.
Ash: But it's funnier if it happens this way!
Brock: Trust me, it isn't.

>The Pizza Cats then 
>go to the crop duster. He says he can help.

Misty: But not in quite so many words.
Ash: Any idea why there's no dialogue in here?
Brock: Ummm, he was working for the effect of dubbing on anime?

>He gets in his plane and travels 
>over the crop fields while putting out a chemical that kills all the bugs. 

Michelle: Ahh, the wonders of DDT!
Misty: (Crop duster) Oops!  I accidentally put the Agent Orange in my tanks!  
Sorry!
Ash: (Crop Duster) I hope you guys don't mind breathing sarin for a while!

>After awhile the crops grow back and every thing is normal.

Michelle: And there was much rejoicing.
(silence)
Michelle: Ahem-
Brock: No!  We're tired of doing that gag!
Michelle: Okay, but at least we can get out of here.
Ash: Already?  Man, that *was* short!
Voice of Jesse: Not hardly!

>Bad Bird's Power
>Written by: Koopa

Misty: (hums theme to Super Mario Brothers)
Ash: Faster than a speeding Slowpoke!  More powerful than a raging Caterpie!  
Able to leap small ditches in almost a single bound!

>The Big Cheese is building a parallel world transporter.

Misty: What if you could travel to parallel worlds?  Where it's the same year, 
and you're the same person.  And what if you can't find your way home?
Brock: (hums theme to Sliders)

>It's a device that 
>will transport you to a parallel world.

Ash: ...As opposed to the parallel world transporter that cuts your lawn while 
giving your wife a make-over.
Michelle: Come on!  Where's the convenience in that?  I want my parallel world 
transporter to transport parallel worlds to me!

>Bad Bird was getting hungry so he 
>ordered a pizza.

Michelle: But watch out, Bad Bird!  They don't take American Express!

>If you can't guess what pizza restraint he ordered from then 
>you probly have never watched the show.

Misty: (Bad Bird) Samurai Pizza Cat Pizza delivery service...  Sounds safe 
enough to me!
Michelle: (Francine) No, I took out a restraining pizza on you two weeks ago, 
now stop calling!

>Guido is sent to deliver the pizza to 
>the palace were Bad Bird is,

Ash: Wait, the palace were and Bad Bird is?  I'm confused...
Michelle: Don't worry about it.  It's similar to the Fanfic Generator.  Without 
the kumquats.

>and were Big Cheese is about to use the device. 

Misty: Hey!  That looks like a Hamdinger!
Brock: (Big Cheese) Actually, I just keep it around as a conversation piece.

>Bad Bird goes to the front gate to get the Pizza.

Misty: ...Utilizing his psychic powers to sense the delivery before the bell is 
even rung!
Ash: But he still can't tell that they used ham, even after he specifically 
asked them *not to!*

>As he opens the door Big 
>Cheese pulls the lever to open the portal to the other world.

Misty: (Game show host) It's a brand new car!
Rest: (cheering)

>The portal is 
>huge and is like a vacuum.

Ash, Michelle, and Brock: (Dark Helmet, Colonel Sanders, and President Scroove) 
Suck, suck, SUCK, SUCK, SUCK!!!

>It sucks every one in the palace into the portal. 

Misty: (Yogurt) Lone Star!  Use the Schwartz!

>The portal opens in a mountain range. Every one in the palace is tossed out of 
>the portal.

Brock: ...Falling a mile and a half through thin air to their deaths, the end.
Michelle: So, what's on Raw?

>As it turns out every one in the palace was out in the shopping 
>market looking for a book for princess Vi who just had to have it.

Misty: (Koopa) Not like I wanted to complicate things!  No, that would make the 
story longer and interesting!

>Every one 
>except Emperor Fred. Big Cheese, Jerry, Bad Bird and Guido of course were the 
>only ones there.

Ash: So, wait.  Is Emperor Fred the only one there, or are those other people 
there alone, or are- OWWW!!!
Michelle: I told you to stop trying to make sense of it...

>Every one gets up.

Brock: Emperor Fred was found alive, and of normal size, some 800 miles away.  
There was no Dimensional Teleporter.

>Suddenly a gush of wind hits all of them. 

Misty: Quick, someone call Ilya Morumetz!
Michelle: And don't mention the ham!

>Guido and Fred are blown in one direction while Big Chsees and Jerry are blown 
>in another direction.

Ash: Well, at least it isn't one of those "join-forces-to-survive" cliches.
Michelle: (singing) My bonnie lies over the ocean, my bonnie lies over the 
sea...

>Bad Bid is blown in another direction as well.

Brock: The auctioneer felt that it wasn't worth his trouble, so he threw it out!
Michelle: That was a bad *garg*, Brock.
Ash: And that was even worse, Michelle.

>So they 
>all are blown away. To be continued...

Ash: Well, maybe another time.  But we need a break now.
Jesse: No way in Hell!

>Changing Polly
>Written by Koopa
>Guru Lou is making a device that can change what you are.

Misty: Kind of like Paxil.
Brock: Better living through substance abuse!
Ash: Side effects may include lack of dialogue, bad grammar, spelling problems, 
cliche plots, and diarrhea.

>Like last time with the youth drink Guru Lou doesn't want to test it on 
>himself.

Michelle: He must have learned from Washuu.
Misty: (Guru) I like you, Speedy.  Do you want to be my guinea pig?

>He sends the device to the Pizza Cat Parlor.

Brock: (Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick...)

>When it gets there Polly opens the box. She looks at it. There is a note 
>attached to it. It says 

Ash: "No one shoots at Santa Claus..."
Michelle: "Pick me up..."

>" Point the button at some one and press the button to take there picture. 

Brock: Were-Picture!
Misty: Were-Picture?
Ash: (Igor) There-Picture!

>Polly wants to take a picture of herself so she points it at her self and 
>presses the button.

Misty: However, to her terror, she realized that as soon as she had pushed the 
button.......... she had FORGOTTEN TO REMOVE THE DUST LENS!!!

>The device turns Polly into a yak. Polly is scared. She's not a cat any more. 

Brock: (Polly) How are Speedy and I supposed to have sex now?
Michelle: A perplexing situation, indeed.
Ash: I'd give it three weeks before it's somewhere on the web.

>Then Speedy and Guido enter the room. They pass Polly and say " Speedy: Hi 
>Polly. Guido: You look good." 

Ash: Wait a minute, how exactly does one say that?
Michelle: Come on, man!  That's easy!  Watch!  "Speedy: Hi Polly.  Guido: You 
look good."
Ash: Oh.

>Polly gets mad and she rams Speedy and Guido. After Speedy and Guido get healed 
>up they really look at Polly and see that she is a yak.

Misty: (Speedy) Like, my god, Polly!  Yak is *so* last year!  Gag me with a wire 
hanger!

>Polly asks them what she's going to do. Guido goes and gets the device and 
>points it at Polly. He says maybe it will change her back.

Ash: But not in those words exactly.  Something more along the lines of "I have 
a hypothesis upon the ability of this device to return our mutual friend here to 
her original anthropomorphic form."

>He presses the button and Polly turns into a hippo. Speedy says this isn't 
>working.

Brock: Yup, two tries are representative of a full set!
Misty: Well, as far as a half-hour cartoon goes, it is.

>He suggests they go to Guru Lou for help. They all go to Guru Lou's house and 
>ask him if he can change Polly back to normal. Speedy says if he can't do it 
>then he's sure Polly can live with it.

Michelle: (Polly) Hey!  You try living as a hippo!
Ash: (Speedy) Shut up, woman!  Now, get back in the kitchen and make me some 
pie!

>After a lot of pointless test Guru Lou turns Polly back to normal.

Michelle: By splashing her with hot water.  Unfortunately, she still turns back 
whenever she's splashed with cold water.
Ash: Giving rise to a whole new anime series, Polly Half.
Misty: Oh, come on!  Like that sort of story would ever happen...

>Speedy 
>tosses the device out the window so it won't hurt any one again.

Brock: Except for the guy that it fell on.

>After the cats leave Guru Lou decides to never send those cats a test 
>experiment again. He almost got caught.

Misty: (Speedy) Wait, before we leave, what's that red stuff on your hand?
Ash: (Lou) Nothing!  Nothing!
Brock: Great, that's over!  Let's get out of here!
Jesse: NEVER!  YOU WILL DIE!!!
James: Ma'am, the Koopa fics have disappeared!
Jesse: Let me look! (frantic tapping of keys) .........  You're off the hook 
this time, my little Woopers.  But remember, next time, it won't be quite so 
easy!  You will die!
(All stand up to exit the theatre)

Reverse Door Sequence

	Outside of the theatre, the computer is still running.  Misty, Michelle, 
Brock, and Ash are sitting in a circle of chairs beside the computer, in an 
intervention format.
	"Now, Ash, we're your friends," Michelle begins.  "And we think that you 
have a problem.  Now, how do you feel about playing the Sim games?"
	"I think that they're a fun way to pass the time between fics," Ash 
replies.  "There's not much else to do up here, so why not play the game?"
	"Now, Ash, you know that there are better things to do than that," Misty 
says.  "You could watch-"
	"Done it," Ash replies.
	"You mean, you've already-"
	"Yup," Ash says.
	"And did you try reading-"
	"Yes every book on the Satellite," Ash says.
	"Oh, now that's just not true," Michelle replies.  "I haven't seen you 
reading 'A Tale of Two Cities.'"
	"I did just the other day," Ash says.
	"Then what was the name of-"
	"Paris and London."
	"All right, if you say so," Michelle replies.  "Even I haven't had the 
chance to read it yet."  A moment of silence ensues as the others try to think 
of a way to convince Ash that he has a problem.
	"Ash, how about this?" Michelle says, picking up the computer and dropping 
it in the waste port.  A moment later, the computer is ejected into the vacuum 
of space, cords pulled out of the wall with a painful sound.  "No more computer 
means no more Sim games.  Understood?"  When she turns around to the circle of 
chairs, all three are gone.  A moment later, three space-suited figured appear 
outside the ship, floating towards the marooned computer.  The red Mads' Light 
flashes and Michelle presses the button.  "What do you think, sirs?"

Deep 251

	The Laboratory is decorated with balloons and streamers.  A large podium 
is standing in the middle of the stage with a microphone on the top.  A large 
pile of trash paper stands near by the stage.
	"Well, we've finished recounting the ballots for the third time, thank you 
so much Mr. Ortega," Jesse says with a sneer.  "And the winner has come out to 
be Mr. Torgo AGAIN!"

	"Hey, Jesse, what's the pile of trash behind you?" Michelle asks, 
perplexed.

	"Oh, those are just the throw-away write-in votes," Jesse replies.  
"Apparently, Mr. Nader, who wasn't even running, received twice as many votes as 
either of the other two.  But, since we're not really a democracy around here, 
we're just giving it to Torgo.  HE was running.  If you want to get voted the 
favorite Sidekick next year, Mr. Nader, then I'd recommend that you actually 
declare your candidacy.  And now, for Mr. Torgo's speech."
	Torgo hobbles up to the podium, accompanied by his usual theme music, and 
adjusts the mike.  "ComPlIMentarY crAzy breAD fOr EverYBOdy!" he exclaims to the 
sound of cheering.  He leaves the podium and heads straight to the snack bar, 
followed by the thralls of supporters who voted for him.
	Jesse sneaks up to the podium and says, "Push the button, James."

*Blip*
*FWOOSH!*

	And so ends my newest MSTing.  Well, I've had fun doing this one.  I only 
wish that Koopa's stuff hadn't disappeared before I had done all that I had 
wanted to.  Tsk to whoever made it go away!  Well, anyway, at least this one's 
out of the way.  Now, I can get on with a crap load of other stuff that I've got 
sitting around and needs to be finished.  Yes, I keep going on about it, but 
hey, at least I'm getting something done!
	Well, I'd like to thank Koopa for writing these little spamfics and remind 
him that this whole thing was not meant as an insult.  I was just having a bit 
of fun, and it's only really meant as a form of C&C.
	Well, other than that, I'm done with this, and I'm ready to get out of 
here.  Summer break's about to begin, and I'm ready for it!

MST3K created by:
Joel Hodgeson

MST3K owned by:
Best Brains, Inc.

Original fic by:
Koopa

MSTing by:
M.H. Torringjan

E-mail me at:
jmh6187@uncwil.edu

Keep circulating the fanfics!

>Polly wants to take a picture of herself so she points it at her self and 
>presses the button. The device turns Polly into a yak.