*insert standard disclaimer*
Untitled 2
by Coochan (peacecraft@aol.com)
It was one of those far-off childhood memories, where the thoughts and
emotions were clearer than the images. As if the memory itself had not
grown with her, but remained in child-like mis-proportions. In waking
hours, Misao's memory of that night was blurry and fragile as anything
important only half remembered could be. It was at night, in her dreams,
that the memory snapped itself into focus, where images were as crisp
and clear as the emotions felt, as sharp and fresh as if she were still
a child, and it had only happened yesterday.
It began as it always did, the instant she fell asleep the years slipped
off of her, until she was only 6 years old, curled up in contented
warmth within her futon, while the cold, stale winter night slept
outside along with her. And then his hand was on her shoulder, cool and
dry compared to her warm, sleep-flushed skin. Whisper soft, just loud
enough to wake her, but not so loud as to startle or disorient her, his
voice blew into her ears.
"Misao-chan. Misao-chan, wake up."
She turned in her futon towards his voice, tangling her blankets about
her legs and waist as she looked up into his impassive, moonlit face.
Dragging one small hand out of the depths of her blankets, she rubbed at
one eye drearily and patiently waited for the blurry face above her to
come into focus. When it did, she noticed the darkness around Aoshi's
pale face, and the biting air outside of her well-heated futon.
Smiling despite herself at the unexpected visit from her beloved
okashira, Misao allowed the annoyance she felt at the unexpected
awakening slip into her voice as she whispered, "Aoshi-sumuh.. S'not
morning..Wud'r you doin'...?" Her tongue felt thick and slack in her
mouth with hours of disuse, and she struggled to form words around it.
Despite the incoherence of the words, Aoshi managed to grasp the genuine
irritation in her voice, sleepy though it was.
The edge of one side of Aoshi's mouth curled upwards a fraction of an
inch in faint amusement as he slowly tucked his hands under her shoulder
blades and the crook of her legs, lifting her up, blanket and all.
"Shhh...I have a surprise for you," he murmured in his deep, reassuring
voice as he carried her down the darkened halls of the Aoiya, towards
the door that led out to the central courtyard. "But first, you must
close your eyes."
Without question or hesitation, Misao obediently closed her eyes, too
close to sleep to ask him what he was doing, or bounce excitedly in his
arms in expectation of her 'surprise'. Looping her arms around Aoshi's
head and clasping her hands at the base of his neck, Misao listened to
the faint rasp of wood on wood as a door was being slid open.
She felt the cold bite of winter air against her skin, announcing that
they were now outside, walking swiftly towards the center of the
courtyard. Something kept tickling her skin, small pinpricks of
sensation against her ankle, then her cheek, her fingertip, and her
nose. She felt it weaving into her loosely braided hair; she felt it
alighting on her eyelashes, and she felt it grazing against her lip,
dissolving in cold heat.
Even before Aoshi told her to open her eyes, her mind tingled with the
faintest of understanding and dawning recognition. Still, when she did
open her eyes, she could not help the breathless gasp that escaped her
lips, the sight before her leaving her breathless and slack-jawed.
Snow draped the lawn and trees in a thin blanket, glimmering and
twinkling in the moonlight. It had alighted in Aoshi's hair and it
shimmered on her blanket, collecting in the folds. It fell softly and
silently around them, undisturbed by their presence.
Her eyes glimmered with appreciation and joy at the beauty around her as
she unclasped one of her hands from around Aoshi's neck and watched the
snowflakes alight on her fingertips, slowly dissolving into wet
droplets. She gave a delighted giggle as Aoshi gently ruffled his
fingers through her bangs, setting loose a small shower of snowflakes
upon her blanket and his shirtfront. Aoshi rarely gave such open
affection, and Misao reveled in it, tilting her head back against his
shoulder and watching the snowflakes spiral down towards them.
The snow fell thick and white, in fat clusters of flakes that stuck
together as they fell to the earth. Misao watched them fall, struck
silent by the vibrancy and beauty of it. The first snowfall of the
season. She sighed in drowsy contentment as she watched the drifting
flakes, absently brushing a slowly growing mound of snowflakes off of
Aoshi's shoulder. Eyelids at half-mast, she happily watched the
snowfall, becoming more awake as she became more entranced.
She had waited in hungry anticipation for the first snowfall for several
weeks, eyeing the dark clouds that lined the sky in impatient
expectation; sighing in exasperation as the ground grew cold and hard,
with no trace of snow on top of it. The fact that Aoshi had woken her up
in the night to witness the much-anticipated event left her happy and
warm inside. A sort of inner glow fueled solely by the good intentions
of her beloved Aoshi-sama.
Aoshi shifted her slightly so that he carried her mostly on his hip,
using one arm to support her rump and the other to keep her blanket
against and draped over her shoulders. She sighed in contentment, her
back half warmed by her blanket, her front warmed by Aoshi's body heat.
He trudged silently towards the garden, dusting off a thin layer of snow
from a bench and seating himself with Misao sitting across his lap. And
there they sat, with Misao's cheek resting against his chest, her head
tucked under his chin, both watching the snow fall. Aside from small
exclamations from Misao such as "Kireii, ne...", nothing was said.
As it had to, the snowfall ended, almost abruptly, and without a word
said between them, Misao wrapped her arms back around Aoshi's neck and
Aoshi stood up and trudged back through the thin layer of snow towards
the entrance of the Aoiya. Back down the dark hallway he padded,
stopping only to grab a fresh blanket for Misao, and then she was back
in her room, settled under a fresh, dry blanket, growing almost
instantly drowsy. She fought off sleep a few moments more to murmur,
"Arigatou, Aoshi-sama." Aoshi smiled his traditional ghost-like shadow
of a smile and touched her cheek with his forefinger before murmuring,
"Oyasumi nasai, Misao-chan.", then he slowly stood up and walked out of
her room.
Always the dream ended this way, and always at this point she woke up in
a slightly startled state to find herself years older and the dream a
fading memory. And always she was hit with dual emotions of happiness
for one of her favorite memories and sadness over the absence of Aoshi.
That night had been one of the last close moments she and Aoshi had
shared before he and the others had gone from her life without warning
or goodbye.
At the time, Misao had not understood why Aoshi had bothered to come
wake her up on the night of the first snowfall. All she knew was she was
happy he had Though she knew he loved her at the time, it was an
effortless and unconscious love, as unthought of and unquestioned by
Aoshi as the love of a sibling; affection towards her he had not chosen
to have, but had nonetheless. He seemed so generally inattentive to her
thoughts when not training or babysitting her that she had assumed he
did not know of her more private dreams and wishes.
So she did not think of his reasons for taking her out to see the snow
until long after he and the others had gone. The fact that he had been
aware of her secret longing to see the first snowfall, and had taken her
to see it left her more touched and wistful both by his gesture and the
memory than she had been before. The memory became infinitely more
precious after that moment.
(
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geocities.com/tokyo/shrine) (
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