笑話區‧有趣的車牌和貼紙

有趣的車牌和貼紙

Xiren 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-10-98 11:17 PM ET (US) 昔人喜歡看來往車輛的車牌和貼紙 (bumper stickers)。如果各位看見有趣的車牌或貼紙，不如來此分享一下吧！今天回家的路上看到三個有趣的車牌： 1. NT WINS 2. WASH ME 3. RIP CIT 聽朋友說他見到一輛福斯（Volkswagen）今年上市的新型金龜車，車牌是 FEATURE，有沒有人知道這是什麼意思呢？（讀電腦或從事電腦業的朋友來猜猜吧！）註：CIT 是著名的 California Institute of 　　Technology（加州理工學院）的縮寫。
Jean 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-13-98 3:00 PM ET (US) 翻故紙堆才找到： Bumper stickers we'll probably never see: 1 I love animals - they taste great! 2 I love cats - they taste just like chicken! 3 Earth first! We'll strip-mine the other planets later. 4 He who laughs last, thinks slowest. 5 Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. 6 All generalizations are false, including this one - Contributed by Timothy Siedge, Reader's Digest, January 1998 7 Forget world peace! Visualize using turn signals. 8 Driving up a hill, I came to a stop for a red light when I noticed the car ahead of me had a small sign taped to its back window. Hoping for a closer look, I crept to within inches of the other vehicle's bumpter. The sign read: "Please stay back. Learning to shift." -Contributed by W. Frank Allen (Tallahassee, Fla., Reader's Digest, March 1997) 9 If you hate people tailgating, why use bumper stickers?
Xiren 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-14-98 1:34 AM ET (US) Bumper Stickers -- The War of the Roses * A fool and his money are a girl's best friend. * All I ask is that you treat me no differently than you would the Queen. * Battered Women? And all this time I've been eating them plain! * Beauty is only a light switch away. * Few women admit their age, few men act it. * First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering. * FOR SALE: Ex-Wife. Take Over Payments Or Best Offer. * Grow your own dope. Plant a man. * How Can I Miss You if You Won't Go Away? * I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met. * I am Woman. I am Invincible. I am Tired. * I may be fat, but you're ugly - I can lose weight! * I Still Miss My Ex... But My Aim Is Improving. * I think, therefore I am single. * I'm not playing hard to get, I AM hard to get. * I'm not your type, I have a pulse. * I'm out of bed and dressed. What more do you want? * If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? * If God intended man to smoke, He would have set him on fire. * If only women gossip, how do men keep track of who's "easy?" * If You Are Rich, I Am Single! * Life's too short to dance with ugly men/women. * Make love not war. Hell, do both. Get married. * Man made beer. God made pot. Who do you trust? * Man who fights with wife all day gets no piece at night. * Men are idiots and I married their king. * Men are proof that women can take a joke. * Men don't roar, women roar. Then they throw heavy objects. * My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her...or something like that. * My wife said "If you go hunting or fishing one more time I'm going to leave you" ...I'm sure going to miss her. * No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit. * Real women don't have hot flashes, they have power surges. * Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I will show you a man who can't get his pants off! * Sorry, I don't date outside my species. * We have strange and wonderful relationship. You're strange and I'm wonderful. * Which came first? The woman or the department store? * WIFE AND DOG MISSING.. REWARD FOR DOG. * Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse. * Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition. Collected and compiled by Xiren
Xiren 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-15-98 12:09 AM ET (US) Bumper Stickers -- ＳＰＥＥＤ * BAD COP! - NO DONUT!!! * Boldly going nowhere. * CAUTION! I drive like you do! * COPS: Just Say "NO" to DONUTS. * Cover me. I'm changing lanes. * Did you check if your horn works? * DIE TAILGATER SKUM! * Demolition Derby Driver on board. * Do unto others, then run.-- Benny Hill * Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. * FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS DRIVE BROKE. * Friends don't let friends drive NAKED. * Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies. * Having an out of body experience. Back in five. * Honk if you love peace and quiet. * Horn broken, watch for finger. * HANG-UP & DRIVE * I Brake For No Apparent Reason. * I brake for...wait...AAAH!...NO BRAKES!!!!! * I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder. * I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. * I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. * I hear you lost your cat? Check under my tire. * I may be slow, but I'm ahead of you! * I Want To Die In My Sleep Like My Grandfather.. 　Not Kicking And Screaming Like His Passengers. * I'm not a bad driver, I'm automotively challenged. * I'm not as think as you drunk I am. * I'm not driving fast-just flying low. * If Common Sense Is So Common.. Why Don't You Have Any? * If everything is coming your way, then you're in the wrong lane! * If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you. * If you don't like my driving, GET OFF THE SIDEWALK! * It may be that your purpose in life is simply to serve 　as a warning to others. * Keep Your Driving In Line.. Save Your Life And Mine * My other car is a broom * My other vehicle is a Romulan Warbird! * No radio - already stolen. * Pardon my driving, I'm reloading. * PLEASE HONK IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE MY FINGER * Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car. * They were screaming "Stop reading that insanely long bumper 　sticker and watch the road...” * Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left. * Warning: Dates In Calendar Are Closer Than They Appear. * When I get to where I'm going, will somebody please tell me 　where I am? * You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through 　peanut butter. * YOU! OUT OF THE GENE POOL! 　　 Collected and compiled by Xiren
wuji 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-15-98 11:24 AM ET (US) "I'd rather see my sister become a prostitute than an Edmonton Oilers fan."
XiaHouJi 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-15-98 6:42 PM ET (US) Wuji: You are a Calgary Flames fan right? No wonder you said that..... I know you like football, do you know what is the Buffalo "BILLS" stand for?
wuji 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-16-98 3:48 PM ET (US) No.(Does it have anything to do with Clinton or Gates)
XiaHouJi 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-19-98 8:08 AM ET (US) Nah, it's a pretty old saying: "Boy, I Love Losing Superbowl."
CC 個人資料 \| email	posted 12-20-98 8:03 AM ET (US) Xiren: 新型金龜車，車牌是 FEATURE，是什麼意思呢？
Xiren 個人資料 \| email	posted 12-20-98 11:36 AM ET (US) 回高連：許多人暱稱金龜車 (Beatle) 為 Bug. 電腦界有一句名言－－ It's not a bug; it's a feature. (請暫時不要將這篇移走，我還有些 bumper stickers 系列沒貼上來，之前沒時間整理。謝謝！)
CC 個人資料 \| email	posted 12-20-98 12:49 PM ET (US) 放心好了。問問題的原因就是把題目推上頁頂。那些BS實在不錯。
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Xiren 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-10-98 11:17 PM ET (US) 昔人喜歡看來往車輛的車牌和貼紙 (bumper stickers)。如果各位看見有趣的車牌或貼紙，不如來此分享一下吧！今天回家的路上看到三個有趣的車牌： 1. NT WINS 2. WASH ME 3. RIP CIT 聽朋友說他見到一輛福斯（Volkswagen）今年上市的新型金龜車，車牌是 FEATURE，有沒有人知道這是什麼意思呢？（讀電腦或從事電腦業的朋友來猜猜吧！）註：CIT 是著名的 California Institute of 　　Technology（加州理工學院）的縮寫。
Jean 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-13-98 3:00 PM ET (US) 翻故紙堆才找到： Bumper stickers we'll probably never see: 1 I love animals - they taste great! 2 I love cats - they taste just like chicken! 3 Earth first! We'll strip-mine the other planets later. 4 He who laughs last, thinks slowest. 5 Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. 6 All generalizations are false, including this one - Contributed by Timothy Siedge, Reader's Digest, January 1998 7 Forget world peace! Visualize using turn signals. 8 Driving up a hill, I came to a stop for a red light when I noticed the car ahead of me had a small sign taped to its back window. Hoping for a closer look, I crept to within inches of the other vehicle's bumpter. The sign read: "Please stay back. Learning to shift." -Contributed by W. Frank Allen (Tallahassee, Fla., Reader's Digest, March 1997) 9 If you hate people tailgating, why use bumper stickers?
Xiren 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-14-98 1:34 AM ET (US) Bumper Stickers -- The War of the Roses * A fool and his money are a girl's best friend. * All I ask is that you treat me no differently than you would the Queen. * Battered Women? And all this time I've been eating them plain! * Beauty is only a light switch away. * Few women admit their age, few men act it. * First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering. * FOR SALE: Ex-Wife. Take Over Payments Or Best Offer. * Grow your own dope. Plant a man. * How Can I Miss You if You Won't Go Away? * I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met. * I am Woman. I am Invincible. I am Tired. * I may be fat, but you're ugly - I can lose weight! * I Still Miss My Ex... But My Aim Is Improving. * I think, therefore I am single. * I'm not playing hard to get, I AM hard to get. * I'm not your type, I have a pulse. * I'm out of bed and dressed. What more do you want? * If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? * If God intended man to smoke, He would have set him on fire. * If only women gossip, how do men keep track of who's "easy?" * If You Are Rich, I Am Single! * Life's too short to dance with ugly men/women. * Make love not war. Hell, do both. Get married. * Man made beer. God made pot. Who do you trust? * Man who fights with wife all day gets no piece at night. * Men are idiots and I married their king. * Men are proof that women can take a joke. * Men don't roar, women roar. Then they throw heavy objects. * My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her...or something like that. * My wife said "If you go hunting or fishing one more time I'm going to leave you" ...I'm sure going to miss her. * No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit. * Real women don't have hot flashes, they have power surges. * Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I will show you a man who can't get his pants off! * Sorry, I don't date outside my species. * We have strange and wonderful relationship. You're strange and I'm wonderful. * Which came first? The woman or the department store? * WIFE AND DOG MISSING.. REWARD FOR DOG. * Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse. * Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition. Collected and compiled by Xiren
Xiren 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-15-98 12:09 AM ET (US) Bumper Stickers -- ＳＰＥＥＤ * BAD COP! - NO DONUT!!! * Boldly going nowhere. * CAUTION! I drive like you do! * COPS: Just Say "NO" to DONUTS. * Cover me. I'm changing lanes. * Did you check if your horn works? * DIE TAILGATER SKUM! * Demolition Derby Driver on board. * Do unto others, then run.-- Benny Hill * Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines. * FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS DRIVE BROKE. * Friends don't let friends drive NAKED. * Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies. * Having an out of body experience. Back in five. * Honk if you love peace and quiet. * Horn broken, watch for finger. * HANG-UP & DRIVE * I Brake For No Apparent Reason. * I brake for...wait...AAAH!...NO BRAKES!!!!! * I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder. * I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. * I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe. * I hear you lost your cat? Check under my tire. * I may be slow, but I'm ahead of you! * I Want To Die In My Sleep Like My Grandfather.. 　Not Kicking And Screaming Like His Passengers. * I'm not a bad driver, I'm automotively challenged. * I'm not as think as you drunk I am. * I'm not driving fast-just flying low. * If Common Sense Is So Common.. Why Don't You Have Any? * If everything is coming your way, then you're in the wrong lane! * If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you. * If you don't like my driving, GET OFF THE SIDEWALK! * It may be that your purpose in life is simply to serve 　as a warning to others. * Keep Your Driving In Line.. Save Your Life And Mine * My other car is a broom * My other vehicle is a Romulan Warbird! * No radio - already stolen. * Pardon my driving, I'm reloading. * PLEASE HONK IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE MY FINGER * Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car. * They were screaming "Stop reading that insanely long bumper 　sticker and watch the road...” * Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left. * Warning: Dates In Calendar Are Closer Than They Appear. * When I get to where I'm going, will somebody please tell me 　where I am? * You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through 　peanut butter. * YOU! OUT OF THE GENE POOL! 　　 Collected and compiled by Xiren
wuji 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-15-98 11:24 AM ET (US) "I'd rather see my sister become a prostitute than an Edmonton Oilers fan."
XiaHouJi 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-15-98 6:42 PM ET (US) Wuji: You are a Calgary Flames fan right? No wonder you said that..... I know you like football, do you know what is the Buffalo "BILLS" stand for?
wuji 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-16-98 3:48 PM ET (US) No.(Does it have anything to do with Clinton or Gates)
XiaHouJi 個人資料 \| email	posted 09-19-98 8:08 AM ET (US) Nah, it's a pretty old saying: "Boy, I Love Losing Superbowl."
CC 個人資料 \| email	posted 12-20-98 8:03 AM ET (US) Xiren: 新型金龜車，車牌是 FEATURE，是什麼意思呢？
Xiren 個人資料 \| email	posted 12-20-98 11:36 AM ET (US) 回高連：許多人暱稱金龜車 (Beatle) 為 Bug. 電腦界有一句名言－－ It's not a bug; it's a feature. (請暫時不要將這篇移走，我還有些 bumper stickers 系列沒貼上來，之前沒時間整理。謝謝！)
CC 個人資料 \| email	posted 12-20-98 12:49 PM ET (US) 放心好了。問問題的原因就是把題目推上頁頂。那些BS實在不錯。
【楊過的傷心小站 \| 過兒的討論區 \| 討論精華】【寫信給過兒 \| 笑話區 \| 笑話區精華討論主頁】