China ( Revised )
By Rain Ayo ( stardreamer@white-star.com )
Usagi was in the middle of one of her now habitual walks
through Tokyo. She felt restless and sour. Nothing her friends had
been able to do helped. Not even little Chibi-Usa, who suprisingly
had been trying to be more friendly to her, had managed to break one
of her "moods". Usagi would become silent and her mind off in the
middle of her own self doubt. Nothing would bring her back to the
real world, not even a beloved triple chocolate sundae. Everyone was
worried about her.
This day was a particularly sour one. The weather teetering
on the edge of a storm. Letting the occasional drop fall from the
sky to scare everyone. Usagi remained unchanged by it all. She
continued to walk, her mind repeating the same words over and over
like a mantra. 'Why, Mamo-chan? Why? I just don't understand any
of it at all. Why?'
The storm finally won out and water poured down from the
heavens like a morning widow's tears. Usagi was soaked in an
instant, but she hardly cared. She wrapped her arms around her cold
body and treaded on, lost in her own dark thoughts.
Soft music flittered to her ears and she looked around for
its source. The music held a sadness to it that echoed her own.
Drawn to the music, she entered a small cafe that it had exited. The
name she'd read off the plate outside, was Black Winged Roses. It
seemed like fate or kismet or destiny.
A young woman sat at the baby grand piano, playing the last
notes of the song she'd been playing. She smiled softly, almost
sympathetically, as Usagi entered the cafe. The young woman nodded
slowly and began to play again, to Usagi and the empty room.
Words and music flittered around Usagi and she felt like she
was going to cry. This music was her sorrow. If her emotions could
have been shown in an almost physical way, this would have been
perfect to show it. Silent tears slipped down her cheeks and she
slowly made her way to the piano.
The final notes vanished in the air, bringing Usagi crashing
down to reality. The young woman's caring gaze looked Usagi over
carefully. "You looked like you needed a song, dear," she said
gently.
Usagi nodded. "Arigato. That was so beautiful. What is it
called?" she asked.
"It's called China," she said. She thought for a moment,
looking into Usagi's sad eyes. "I wish I could give you a copy of
the song, but all I have is the lyrics." She moved some of the
papers piled high apon the baby grand's cover and pulled out a small
silver folder. All she pulled out of it was a single sheet of paper
and handed it to Usagi.
Usagi looked down at it for a moment and then back at the
young woman gratefully. "Arigato. I don't know how I can thank
you," she said.
"Just a few coins, dear. Just so I can get myself some
dinner," she said with a warm smile.
Usagi put her hand in her pocket and pulled out several
bills. She placed a few of a small domination inside the cup that
sat on top of all her papers. The young woman nodded slowly and went
back to her playing.
She felt elated. Her dreams...how many times had she dreamt
of this? To be here in this dress...to be here listening to these
words...to be here to say, "I do." Mamoru stood there, as immaculate
as ever, in a perfect white tuxedo. His soft smile made the outside
world fade away, only his words managed to break through the haze of
happiness that had formed.
"With this ring...I thee wed," Mamoru said softly, slowly
sliding her ring on her gloved hand. It fit a little tightly, but
she knew it would be fine, once her gloves were off.
Usagi took his larger hand in her own and repeated his words,
lovingly. "With this ring...I thee wed." She gently placed his band
on his finger.
His lips moved closer to hers and she felt her soul reach out
and touch his. Their hearts slowly meshing in this final bond that
would forever unite them. Her dreams...
Pain. Horrible pain. Mamoru was gone, she was afraid that
he was dead and would never return. She searched frantically all
over for him. She caught a finally glance at him, before being
ripped away, with more pain coursing through her then before.
"Stay away from her Mamoru," a loud booming voice called over
her own cries.
"Why? Why must I hurt her like this?" Mamoru's sorrowful
oice choked out.
"It's for her own safety. You must do this to protect her,"
the voice called again.
Usagi forgot about her pain and listened to the voice in
shock. Something about it clicked in her mind as familiar, but she
could not place it, nor did she want to. It's words repeating itself
in her mind. "Stay away from her...stay away from her...stay away
from her..."
It made sense to her. This wasn't something she was
dreaming. No this was something far worse than that.
The darkness of this dream...the heaviness that rested over
her heart...the feelings that fluttered through her mind without an
anchor...the silent trickles that seemed to fall down her dry
face...none of it was her own.
It was all Mamoru's. She felt so close to him in a way she'd
never felt before. Everything he thought or felt she shared with
him, as if for a short while she was him. So now she understood.
Now she understood it all.
Usagi bolted out of bed and rushed to get some clothes on.
Luna yelped as she was thrown off the bed. "Usagi, what are you
doing?" the disgruntled cat asked angrily.
"I've got to see Mamoru," she said sadly. She opened her
window and escaped out into th night. At break neck speed she took
off in the direction her heart called her to.
She arrived at his apartment in record time and rushed
inside. Feeling far to antsy to wait for the elevator, she took off
for the stairs. She waited a moment at his door, allowing herself to
catch her breath.
"Mamoru!" she cried out sorrowfully, as she pounded on his
door. "Gods please Mamoru!"
The door opened quickly and a slightly disheveled Mamoru
rushed out into the hallway. "Usa...Usagi! What are you doing
here?" he asked her in shock.
Usagi looked down at her hands. Silent tears fell gently
down against them. "A dream...a dream...a dream Mamoru..." she said
softly.
"What? What do you mean?" he asked her worriedly.
"Do you know that we are forever inseperable. We are two
parts of one soul? My dreams are your dreams and your dreams are
mine," she said softly. She looked up at his horrified eyes. "I
know...I saw everything. That voice...why do you follow that voice?"
Mamoru turned away from her. His heart could not take the
abject misery that he saw in her eyes. He felt his resolve crumbling
to the ground. His heart pleaded that he hold her close and kiss
away her sorrow. He didn't dare to thought, because he knew that if
he did, he would never let her go. He couldn't leave her in that
much danger because of his desire to be with her. He would not give
into his own heart for her safety.
"I have that dream every night. How do I ignore something
like that when I hear it that often?" he asked.
"It's a damn dream!" Usagi wailed.
"It's not just a dream anymore. Don't you see it. It's a
premonition," Mamoru said angrily. Praying that his voice would
hold, and not give away his own sorrow.
"I don't care. I don't care if our wedding day will be our
last together," Usagi said. She grabbed one of his hands and placed
it over her heart. "If I am not with you Mamo-chan. I am as good as
dead anyway."
Mamoru kept his back to her, and pulled his hand away.
"Usagi you should leave. It's best for all of us this way. Please
don't make it any harder than it already is on us," he said softly.
He walked back into his apartment and closed the door slowly behind
him.
Usagi stared at the door for a moment before she slowly slid
to the floor. She pulled her legs up to her chest and silently
rocked back and forth. "I love you Mamoru," she said softly. A
faint smile kissed her lips. "I'll always hold you close to my
heart, but I can't wait for you. This is what you wanted, ne? For
me to go on with my life. I just pray that you will be safe and
happy without me. Goodbye Mamoru, my love, my soul."
Usagi stood up slowly. From her pocket she pulled out the
lyrics the young musician had given her earlier that day. She let
the sheet of paper fall to the floor. "Goodbye," she whispered one
more time.
Mamoru rushed out of his apartment, but it was too late.
Usagi had rounded the corner and was now heading down the stairs
quickly. He stepped out into the hallway, landing on something with
a crunching noise. He bent down and slowly picked up the piece of
paper Usagi had left.
The scribbled handwritting wasn't Usagi's and he slowly began
to read the words on the page.
China all the way to New York
I can feel the distance getting close
You're right next to me
But I need an airplane
I can the distance as you breathe
Sometimes I think you want me to touch you
How can I when you build the great wall around you
In your eyes I saw a future together
You just look away in the distance
China decorates our table
Funny how the cracks don't seem to show
Pour the wine dear
You say we'll take a holiday
But we never can agree on
Where to go
Sometimes I think you want me to touch you
How can I when you build the great wall around you
In your eyes I saw a future together
You just look away in the distance
China all the way to New York
Maybe you got lost in Mexico
You're right next to me
I think that you can hear
Funny how the distance learns to grow
Sometimes I think you want to touch you
How can I when you build the great wall around you
In your eyes I saw a future together
You just look away in the distance
I can feel the distance
I can feel the distance
I can feel the distance getting close....
Mamoru's eyes filled with tears and he silently went back
into his apartment. "Gomen ne, Usako. I do love you. It will be
best this way for us all. Please believe me," he said sadly.
Music filled the cafe as people talked and drank coffee. It
wasn't very busy for a Wednesday evening. There were only two tables
occupied out of the dozen or so tables that filled the room. A young
woman, who sat in front of the baby grand as Mamoru entered, sang
softly.
His golden angel sat beside the pianist with her eyes closed.
She had a small smile on her lips as the pianist played. She opened
the slowly and said something softly to the young woman. The young
woman nodded with a little smile and the song changed.
Usagi got up and swayed to the music that began. Nothing
very involved, just a gentle sway that seemed odd with the music.
The music was sadness. The lyrics that poured from the musicians
mouth were familiar and Mamoru wanted to cry out in pain. He'd spent
the rest of the previous night unable to sleep, memorizing the
painful words on the page.
"I can feel the distance getting close..."
Was it like this before? Had he made her feel so distant
from him? Had it always been like that for him? He felt the knife
twist deeper into his heart. 'Why did you come here Mamoru? She
said it, you are one soul. You knew that she'd be here. You could
feel it. So why did you come here? This is only more pain for you,'
he asked himself.
Blonde hair swayed gently and a lithe figure poured out her
heart with such a simple motion. The silvery glowing figure was an
amazing sight. He remembered holding her...sweet kisses...loving
eyes...loving words...things he missed more then life itself.
'Usako...I...I am as good as dead as well. Life is not worth
living without you. If you were to die right now, I would follow you
to the grave without another thought,' he thought sadly. 'Is she
right...is it just a dream? If it's not...do I want to take that
chance? She seems to want to so desperately. I...love her too much
to remain like this. Usako, please take me back.'
As if she'd heard his words, Usagi's movement came to a stop
and she looked in his direction. "Mamo...Mamo-chan," she gasped.
Mamoru walked over to her and quickly wrapped his arms around
her. "Gomen nasai, Usako. Gomen nasai," he repeated over and over
into her hair.
Her arms came around him and she gently stroked his hair.
"Gods, no Mamo-chan. I forgive you. I forgive you for everything,"
she said happily. "Just forget it. I love you. I love you so
much."
"I love you my Usako. I'll never let you go. Never...
never..." he said.
The young woman at the piano smiled at them as the song came
to a close. She switched quickly to another song. The beautiful
couple held one another tightly and slowly began to dance as she let
words pour from her heart.
"Black winged roses that safely change their color..." she
sang.
"Mamo-chan?" Usagi asked softly, as they danced.
"Mmm," Mamoru mumbled by her ear.
"What is our love like now?" she asked him. The last words
he'd said still echoed in her mind.
"Our love was once withering rose, but you're light and faith
has brought it back to its original eternal splendor," Mamoru said
looking into her eyes. "It shall never die. Throughout time and
space we'll always remain together."
Happiness radiated from her eyes and she pulled him close for
a sweet kiss. Deliriously happy they held close, their souls
reaching out meshing into one. The perfect unseperable union,
forever holding them together.
*********************************************************************
Did you like it? Was it better than the old version? I've worked
pretty hard on this. I've wanted to do this for sometime now. A
complete revamp of this really popular story.
Did you all know that this is the story that most people like best?
I've gotten so many emails for it and they are still coming in every
once and a while. I'm so proud of it. I really do hope that it
remains as good as it was before, if not better.
The songs used in this story are once again two songs by Tori Amos
( has anyone else got her new CD? Isn't it great? ) called China,
and Little Earthquakes ( which is the song the musician plays as our
lovely couple dances ). I do realize these are really not much in
the way of dancing songs, but if you think of the dancing as more of
a comforting sort of motion, then it makes more sense.
Let me know what you think! Ja for now!
Rain Ayo
http://members.tripod.com/~Rain_Ayo/
(
geocities.com/tokyo/spa/Spa) (
geocities.com/tokyo/spa) (
geocities.com/tokyo)