Note: All names but mine and Keeley's have been changed to protect us from the people we are making fun of. All Fushigi Yuugi characters belong to the people they belong to. Anyone that gets offended by anything in this story…uh…too bad ^_^
* Thud * Keeley had fainted.
To bring you up to speed, we just met a guy, who happened to also be a seishi, named Tavi. And I agreed to be his Miko. Wait, that sounds bad. Agreed to be the Miko of his god. No, that sounds even worse. Ummm…damnit, I agreed to be the Bob no Miko. Get off my back already.
Back to the story. Keeley was on the ground. I immediately ran over to her and started shaking her. “Keeley! Keeley! I’m sorry! Please wake up! I won’t be the Miko if it upsets you so much!”
“Ungh…” Keeley’s eyes fluttered slowly open. One of her hands plucked weakly at my shirtsleeve. “Rach…” her voice was a barely audible whisper.
“What is it, Keeley?”
I felt a hand on my shoulder. Tavi was regarding Keeley in a concerned fashion, which I thought was nice of him. The hand on my shoulder was pretty nice, too.
“Rach…” Every word seemed to be an effort for Keeley.
“I’m here for you…what’s wrong?”
“Rach…need…” her voice was weak.
“What? What do you need? Hang on, Keeley!”
“Need…” she took a labored breath, “Need…”
“What is it???”
“Eggroll…wanton…” She gulped, “egg…drop…soup…”
“WHAT???” Tavi and I yelled in tandem. We stopped and looked at each other. He blushed and looked away. I decided to direct my attention back to Keeley. So I grabbed her by the front of her blouse and started shaking her. “NANI???” I growled.
She grinned sheepishly between shakes. “I’m hungry, ok?”
Tavi’s voice was startled. “Such brutality…”
“Er…” * thud * I abruptly let go mid-shake and backed away. “Uh…it’s not really…”
Something interrupted me. A very LOUD something. Keeley’s stomach was growling with earth shaking force.
Keeley and I both looked at Tavi, grinning and shrugging.
Tavi just looked confused. Now that I didn’t have another distraction, I took a long look at him. My initial impression of cuteness was correct. He was wearing plain earth tone robes, and I had to admit, he was pretty cute. What was with it? A sudden plethora of hot guys. Life was suddenly looking up.
Tavi let out a long-suffering sigh.
I let out an entirely different kind of sigh. Guy heaven. It could only go up...because I knew that if we were in the book world, Chichiri and Tasuki had to be somewhere...
He glanced at me for a moment, and I felt a blush creeping up at my hentai thoughts. He raised an eyebrow slightly, and I looked away.
I thought he was going to say something, but Keeley’s stomach growled again.
With a soft laugh, Tavi reached up and yanked a chord hanging from the ceiling. A low bell sounded, and the man stood up, smoothing his clothing. I’m sorry, but I have some business to take care of now. I rang for a servant. Tell him what you’d like to eat.”
We nodded, and he left, taking his laptop with him.
There was a long moment of silence.
Then Keeley turned to me, a humongous, shit-eating grin on her face.
“What?” I get scared when she smiles like that.
She giggled.
I got even more apprehensive.
“So…Rachael…I saw you blushing…”
I immediately turned red. Damn my complexion anyway. “Uh…I don’t know what you’re implying here…”
Her grin got bigger, which I had thought was impossible. “Oh, come on, Rach. We both know that you never blush unless you're thinking seriously hentai thoughts...”
“Hey! That’s bull and you know it!”
“Oh? Is it?” She raised an eyebrow and gave me the “whatever you say next is gonna be a lie, I just know it” look.
I was saved by a soft tap on the door: the servant that Tavi had called. We let him in and regarded him warily for a moment.
And for once, I was confronted by a perfectly average, middle-aged Chinese man. Finally, a person in ancient China that WOULDN’T cause me to salivate uncontrollably.
“What may I get for you ladies?” He finally broke the silence.
Keeley grinned. “I thought you’d never ask. I’d like egg drop soup, eggrolls, wantons, fried rice, sesame chicken, lo mein, beef with peppers, steamed rice, sweet and sour chicken, fried buns, hot and sour soup, curry, rice noodles, oh…and a pot of tea and some almond cookies.”
The man just stood there with a disbelieving expression on his face.
“Oh, you want anything, Rache?”
* Thud * The poor servant fainted. He was back up on his feet almost immediately, though. Good recovery.
“Ano…I think I’ll just have some tea and steamed rice.” I looked sheepish. Keep in mind—Keeley is the skinny one. It’s just not fair.
The servant left, a faintly dazed expression on his face. Almost immediately, more servants appeared with food, and even better, clean clothes of a little more…uh…conspicuous style.
I was presented with a lovely blue outfit, men’s clothing. No dresses for me. I was ecstatic. “Wow! Thanks! How did you know?”
The servant man reappeared and smiled at me. “A little bird whispered in my ear, lady.”
“AAAAGH! NO WAY IN HELL!”
I blink and looked at Keeley. They were trying to put her a dress.
WHAM! WHAM! Two servants went flying through the windows. Keeley stood there, breathing hard, her fists clenched.
The dress was pink. Ok, I don’t think she overreacted.
“Ano…Mr. Servant…if I were you, and you don’t want to lose anymore staff, you better get her some clothes like mine…in red, maybe?”
The miraculous servant disappeared and reappeared, bearing more clothing. Keeley was soon suitably outfitted.
I picked up my bowl of rice…and before I had taken the first bite, Keeley was through her food and wiping her mouth. I didn’t even pause, though. I’m used to it.
I slowly finished my rice and stretched, enjoying the feeling of my new silk clothing. I glanced at the servant. “Wow, I love these clothes. Thank you again.”
The servant bowed, smiling. “Reserve your thanks for the Emperor. He thought it would suit you.”
“The Emperor? When did we see him?” I glanced at Keeley, who shrugged.
The man looked confused. “Lady, he was here with you. He healed you with his own hands, a great honor.”
Keeley and I looked at each other. “Tavi’s the EMPEROR???”
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