Coruscant Regency Hotel, Coruscant:
Maul stared at himself in the small wall mirror in the back room of the hotel’s main lobby. Behind him, his master, Darth Sidous, was grinning like a loon. Maul snorted and turned to his master.
“Must I do this, my Master?” he asked sourly. Sidious chuckled behind one hand and nodded, trying very hard not to point at his apprentice’s workclothes. Maul was dressed head to toe in a navy blue bellboy’s uniform, gold braided trim lined the sleeves and pantlegs. Placed ackwardly over his horns was a small bellhop’s cap bearing the title of the hotel.
“Yes, my young and impatient apprentice. As part of your training at the Academy you must take on one demanding duty for a whole night. This is an exercise in extreme patience. It will eventually help you defeat your enemies in the future.” Sidious glanced at the wall clock and announced, “Time to go to the front desk, my apprentice. I’m going back to my home and I’ll return for you in the morning.” With that, the hooded Sith master turned and left the small room. Maul grunted as goodbye and glanced at himself in the mirror again. Snarling, he adjusted the tilted cap but to no avail. Guess a lopsided cap was better than nothing. Hell, this whole lesson would’ve been better if he didn’t have to run around dressed like a Republic official.
With a long sigh, Maul left the room and took his place behind the large half-moon shaped front desk to await his arriving guests.
* * *
“We’re in the honeymoon suite.” Maul looked up from his issue of Star Wars Insider at Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn and his happy-go-lucky apprentice, Obi-Wan Kenobi. Supressing a snarl of distaste as his master’s voice reminded him to be patient with these fools, he slapped the magazine down on the desk and walked out from behind the desk. Almost immediately the discarded magazine was snatched up by the jittery Jedi apprentice.
“Oooo! Look, Master! There’s a special on the Queen’s costumes! I always wondered how her traveling gown would look on me,” he piped, burying his face in the magazine. Qui-Gon offered him a patient smile and looked down at the scowling bellhop. Maul only reached up to the Jedi’s chest, something that bothered him greatly. Why couldn’t I have been born with the height worthy of a Sith? he wondered to himself. Damn his parents. He’d have to kill them for having bad genes.
“Our bags are right over there,” Qui-Gon pointed to the luggage cart left by the valet. Maul peered around Qui-Gon’s arm and almost fell over. A good twenty bags full of Sith-knew-what were stacked on the shaky cart. Twin trunks lay beside it along with an odd-looking..hose device attached to a large pole that appeared to have a knobby head at the top. Swallowing back bile, Maul strode past the Jedi and his giggling apprentice and began pushing the cart. He used his Force to lift the trunks and torture device along behind him. Qui-Gon tapped Obi-Wan’s shoulder and idicated that they should follow Maul. Obi-Wan placed the magazine back on the desk and skipped after his master.
Maul managed to shove all of the bags into the elevator then cram himself in. He inched his fingers out from behind the cart to tap the correct floor button. Beside the cart, Obi-Wan was crouched low, his hands fisted near his bent knees and a look of pure determination on his boyish features. Maul raised an eyebrow in confusion. Qui-Gon didn’t seem to notice his apprentice’s precarious position.
Suddenly, as the elevator lurched upward, Obi-Wan began muttering, “Not yet...not yet....not yet..” Maul was further bewildered by this idiot’s behavior. The elevator inched closer to the right floor and when it finally jerked to a stop, Obi-Wan Jedi leaped up to the ceiling of the compartment. Maul pressed himself against the wall of the elevator as Obi-Wan’s head crashed through the ceiling. The hallow sound of his girlish laughter issued down from the hole he’d created with his head. His legs kicked merrily as he chortled and squealed. Qui-Gon calmly removed his apprentice from the ceiling and, while carrying him over his shoulder, walked out of the elevator. Maul looked up into the hole then back at the departing Jedi. The elevator beeped and the doors began to close. Quickly, Maul pushed the cart out between the rapidly closing doors and almost got his jacket tails caught. He yanked the cloth away from the doors and followed the Jedi into the honeymoon suite.
Inside the lavish, if not garish, room Obi-Wan was gushing over the good-sized hot tub in the center of the room. Twin plastic cupids holding urns poured water into the large basin of the tub, something that seemed to fascinate the young Jedi. Maul rolled his eyes and began unloading the cart of baggage. Obi-Wan pranced in a circle around Maul, squealing his questions.
“Can I help oh can I help?!” he demanded in a whiny voice that made Maul’s skin crawl. He reluctantly tossed the heaviest piece of luggage at the eager Jedi and smiled sadistically when the bag promptly sent the idiot Jedi to the floor. As if he felt no pain, Obi-Wan giggled and wiggled out from under the bag. Maul blinked, startled by his inability to feel pain.
“That was fun!” Obi-Wan enthused, clapping his hands together. “Toss me another one, Mister Nice Belloboy sir!” Maul grinned evilly and, using his Force, caused the remaining bags to topple onto the Jedi. That registered some pain. Obi-Wan wailed as the flood of bags drowned him and his protests.
From inside the main bedroom, Qui-Gon poked his head out of the doorway. “Padawan? I need your help with this girdle.” Maul blanched and decided it was time to collect his tip and exit. He shuffled over to Qui-Gon, whipped his hand out, and smiled his best imitation of a friendly smile. Qui-Gon reached into his pocket, the one that wasn’t hooked up to the girdle’s loose straps, and dropped ten credits into the awaiting black palm. Maul eyed the amount, smirked slightly, and left the room.
As he stalked away pushing the empty luggage cart he heard Obi-Wan’s squeals of delight and Qui-Gon’s rumble of pleased laughter. Shuddering almost to the point of a seizure, Maul quickly made his way to the elevator.
Hours later:
The light connecting to the honeymoon’s suite telephone buzzed loudly, alerting the dozing Maul. He snapped awake and sleepily groped for the desk’s phone. “Yes, what do you want?” he asked grumpily.
“Could you please bring up a slab of raw meat, a dead fish, and some eggs?” Qui-Gon’s voice said from the other side of the line. Maul blinked.
“Uhhh..right. Just a few minutes,” he replied and hung up before Qui-Gon could utter a thank you. Maul slid his hands over his face to wipe away any sleep from his eyes and walked into the hotel’s kitchen. He located the items requested and started up the corridor to the elevators. A voice snapped out behind him.
“Hey you!” Maul turned on one foot slowly, casting his addresser a cold glare. The voice belonged to a kid around ten or twelve, human male with a bowl cut of blonde hair and dark blue eyes. He was dressed simply in a brown tunic and protective boots. His scowl was worthy of a Sith’s, Maul mused.
“What do you want, kid?” Maul demanded coldly, his fingers growing numb from holding the raw items in his hands. The boy tried to cross his arms and failed as he replied rudely,
“I’m waiting for my bags to be brought up to my room!” Behind the boy Maul could see a black backpack of sorts with a large bodyshaped bag beside it. Oh goody, a child assassin! Maul thought delightedly. The boy seemed alone; maybe that was his mother inside the bodybag. As Maul pondered the possiblities of the hidden contents of the bag he Force-ed the belongings to follow him into the elevator. The snide youth trailed after him. While the elevator creaked upwards to the third floor, the boy shrieked about something he called a podracer.