Fredwardshi no ahiru by Ushijima Keiko
Translation to English by Y.W
natane@geocities.com
This translation may not be 100% accurate as I tried to make the whole thing "flow" better.
Key
{ } = labels placed by the author
[ ] = action by characters
( ) = speech bubble/ thought
Volume 1 Chapter 1 - Mr. Fredward's Duck
In a bedroom, a woman and a man were talking.
Kitty I didn't kill anyone, I didn't hurt anyone. Do you believe me Douglas?
Douglas Yes I believe you [Drops the phone]
Kitty Thanks [takes a gun]
Douglas (At that moment I realized everything).
Kitty Thanks Douglas
Douglas No Kitty, DON'T!
Kitty I love you [Aims the gun at Douglas]
Sound of phone ringing
Kevin How many times did I tell you, don't phone me when I'm writing!! Who the hell is
it?
Editor Hello sir, have you finished your novel yet?
Kevin Yes. I'm still writing about Kitty, the psychopath who killed Douglas.
Editor Your "Pussy Cat" series is very famous outside the country you know!
Kevin Thanks
Editor Did you slip in a nice scary scene?
Kevin Yes
Editor Don't forget to be sadistic.
Kevin Yes, I'll send it in through the computer.
Editor If the murder scene in the novel by Elyod Nanoc isn't thrilling the readers would
be unhappy.
Murderer...picture of a hand, Kevin looks a little distraught. Flashback to a cemetery ,a woman
reached out to Kevin.
woman Your murderer!
Editor How do you like the countryside? Are you sure you don't want to return to the
city.
Kevin switches his mobile phone off. and opens the curtains.
Kevin (It's been a month since I moved to this quiet, little village. Leaving the
circus like city. Even I move to a quiet place, it's uncertain that things will
change)
Rosemary [Looking at a map] Hmm, Cole Street number 9. Suspense writer Elynod Nanoc.
Nanoc? an unusual name, a foreign writer? Ah here it is, the mailbox's
about to explode. It's been a while since he actually checked the mail, it's
strewn all over the floor. Messy, I'll have to work hard here.
[Knocks on the door] I'm here for the housekeeping job.
Kevin Oh yes, I've been waiting for you. [Looks at the door and saw no one was there.]
Rosemary [Pulled on Kevin's pants with one feathered wing] Down here. I'm Rosemary, you're
new housekeeper.
Kevin D...d...duc...
Rosemary You want to say a duck can talk don't you?
Kevin [Nods his head vigorously]
Rosemary I can speak other languages you know. [Takes the cigarette from Kevin's mouth].
Smoking is poison for your body. [Stabs it out]
Kevin [Unable to speak, his jaw's hanging open] [Change of scene, seating in the
drawing room]. I meant to hire a human housekeeper (maybe this is a dream).
Rosemary [Looking around the messy house] Tsk it's so messy here.
Kevin (A duck can talk?) hey did you hear me!
Rosemary Of course, you're the one who contacted me from the notice board right?
Kevin (Notice board? oh, now I remember. When I first arrived, I saw the note pinned in
the corner of the train station. "Willing to take care of a house". It was not
typed, but written in a beautiful old fashion script. A dried flowed was taped at
the end.)
You mean, that was...
Rosemary Yup, I was the one who wrote it. We came from a special family in the duck
family. We are able to act like human. A long time ago, there was a
clever parrot that taught animal languages to a famous animal doctor. The doctor
learnt many animal languages and taught them in turn how to speak the human
language.
Kevin (It feels like I've heard the story before...but I don't believe it).
Rosemary At that time it was my ancestor who kept his house.
Kevin (There must be a microphone in here somewhere) [Pulls Rosemary's wing and peered
curiously]
Rosemary [Squawks and hits Kevin with her fist] Pervert!
Kevin (How cruel! you don't have to hit me you violent duck)
Rosemary Just give me a 3 days trial run. This house needs a person like me.
Kevin (It turned out she was highly efficient) [Watches Rosemary hang his
laundry and whip the dust away, a small label said "Arnold Schwazduck".
Rosemary [Violently vacuums the carpet] GET LOST!
Kevin (Then...) It's a beautiful house isn't it?
Rosemary Naturally, eventhough it's old, the furniture are kept in good order, I feel
sorry for the house if it is not cleaned. Now, dinner is served.
Kevin Delicious, you're wonderful Rosemary {he who can't resist food}
Rosemary That's good. [smiles] Oh yes, Elyod Nanoc is a pseudonym isn't it? What's your
real name? You don't act like a foreigner. [pours some tea]
Kevin I have thrown it away. Ten pages full of violence. My readers called me the grim
reaper that's my name. Two months ago, a seven-year-old boy shot his friend. He
said that he tried to imitate one of the characters in the Elyod Nanoc novel he
was reading. A boy who didn't believe in death.
Flashback
Boy I thought he'll die straight away, but unlike the novel, he kept on moving so I
was scared. I shot the whole round, but he was still alive. Elyod Nanoc is a
liar. I don't think he ever shot anyone. Otherwise, he wouldn't have lied would
he?
Back in the cemetery
Woman Murderer, because of you my son died!
Rosemary It wasn't your fault!
Kevin No, it wasn't my fault! Even if I didn't write that novel, that boy will find
another reason and do the same thing. But, that's not what worried me. It's not
because my novel was used as a reason to murder [Walks out the door and slammed
it]
Rosemary (This time, my employer is still young, but he already suffered so much...)
Kevin [Smoking in bed] (I don't fit in with a clean room, and warm food. Everytime dawn
comes I have to think of a new method to kill.
Like a bloodthirsty vampire.
I don't worry because my novel was used as a reason to murder. My work...I'm
uncertain about my life. What would happen if I stop writing? the only thing I
know what to do. I will die of starvation in some place. I'm afraid to throw away
the position and fame I achieved so hard.
The wheel of fortune rotates, and I can't stop it...)
Rosemary Breakfast is ready! What?
Kevin [Bathroom door's slammed, he appeared with a towel around his waist]
Rosemary You wake up very early.
Kevin I didn't sleep. I'm used to live at odd times between the day and night. Ten
years ago I would have done anything for a breakfast like this.
Rosemary ?
Kevin When I was younger, I wanted to be a writer. I fought with my father and ran away
from home. I went to the city, stole, fought, got caught by police and do other
petty crimes. I nearly died from starvation and wounds.
Rosemary (Incredible life) [Sweat running down her face with a puzzled expression]
Kevin But I couldn't throw that dream away, because of that dream I managed to be here.
Elyod Nanoc, is Conan Doyle read backward. He was my idol.
Rosemary Reversing your name is the devil's occupation! It could bring you harm!
Kevin After a while it did happen. What I really wanted to do is to write fables.
Rosemary [Shocked as hell] (It doesn't suit you.)
Kevin It doesn't suit me doesn't it? Hoe could something like that suit me.
Rosemary (He buried his feelings when he had to face the competing media. It's no wonder
he felt he always had to force himself.)
In the garden
Rosemary (Would I be able to do something?)
Another ducks comes into view.
Rosemary Oh it's you!
Nina Rosemary!
Kevin [Watches the 2 ducks squawks loudly]
Nina Bye Rosemary
Kevin She went home already?
Rosemary Oh, oh, my friend Nina, she said she experienced some terrible tragedy.
Kevin All I heard was "squawk, squawk".
Rosemary In Mr. Hoffman's rose there was a green caterpillar.
Flashback with Nina in the garden
Nina Tsk if I leave it like that the rose won't flower properly [eats the caterpillar]
Rosemary But Mr. Hoffman thought differently when he saw that.
Hoffman Stupid duck, trying to ruin my rose.
Rosemary He chased her for an hour.
Kevin Hahahah, how unfortunate
Rosemary To us fellow animals that's a great tragedy you know! [bashes him]
Kevin No, I mean yes it is. (It's true though, if human and animals can communicate,
maybe there won't be any misunderstanding).
Rosemary Human must understand our language a little.
Kevin Really? I...
Rosemary Oh yes, do you want to try it out? If you do understand animal speech
Kevin Where are we going?
Rosemary Here we are.
Kevin A cat?
Rosemary Yes, a cat. An animal, which had made friends with human for a long time, but
has a language which humans can not understand.
cat miaow
Kevin All I heard was a miaow.
Rosemary [Standing on Kevin's head] {heavy}. Why don't you try and say hello
Kevin Hi!
Rosemary [Fell off her perch from shock] Do you think cats can speak back in human
language!
Kevin You're the one that told me to, how the hell am I suppose to speak to a cat?
Cat Hisssss
Kevin I think he said be quiet.
Rosemary You're right {sorry for intruding}
Kevin That wasn't bad.
Rosemary It was a good start. Come on let's keep going.
Kevin {Feeling self conscious}
Rosemary You have talked to a foreigner who speaks a different language haven't you?
Talking to animals is similar to it. You watch their expression and body language
to understand their message.
Kevin (Like talking to a foreigner...with animals?)
Rosemary For example, do you know what that bird is saying?
Kevin I don't know, but I did understand what that cat was trying to say.
Rosemary That's because that cat was talking to you.
Kevin Talking to me? (That cat was speaking to me?)
Buster Growling
Rosemary It's Buster, Mr. Hoffman's dog.
Kevin What's wrong? your back's itch. There how does it feel? (Does he also understand
human speech?) {he's heavy}. There, that's it right? bye
Buster WOOF, [jumps and licks Kevin's face]
Kevin What's wrong? do you like me boy?
Rosemary He's worried about you. He knows that you feel unhappy. That dog feels it.
Buster (Be strong, don't loose hope)
Kevin (Is that what he's saying? to me....
I begin to remember things I have forgotten. Christmas carol, people smile, a
small dog that always waits for me while wagging his tail. A girl with sad eyes.
Memories from the past that had been locked in my heart. Maybe I too can write
something...)
Rosemary [yawning]
Kevin Good morning Rosemary. The weather's nice outside.
Rosemary Why are you so early?
Kevin I sent my last script in the post box. I decided I don't want to write suspense
anymore. I sent a collection of children story to a new publisher with my real
name, Kevin Fredward, that's my name.
Rosemary It's a beautiful name, we have celebrate this.
Kevin Rosemary, can I ask you something?
Rosemary Yes?
Kevin Why did you come to this house?
Rosemary It's because you needed me.
Kevin [smiled (aww he's cute)] Oh and Rosemary I need to discuss something with you,
Rosemary {suspicious} Ha?
Kevin Since I'm not writing suspense anymore, my income's lower.
Rosemary Oh that. {ho ho ho }
Kevin Can I lower it down a little.
Rosemary Nope, we stand by our old agreement.
Kevin But I don't have any savings!
Rosemary [rubbing her fist after hitting Kevin] That's why you must work harder and save
more. if you want me as your housekeeper, YOU HAVE TO WORK.
Kevin {SHOCK} (From that moment I thought, maybe my own ancestors were ducks as well)
Rosemary Tea.
Kevin I want to eat pie.
Rosemary Don't be a spendthrift.
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