You have no idea, do you? You're just sitting there, totally unaware that I'm watching every move you make. And it kills me to know that I can't ever reach you, even though you're so close to where I'm standing, leaning here against this wall.

Miserable -- a word to describe how I feel whenever you're near...

I sighed. We're in another long meeting with our producer again and everyone seemed bored as hell; even Takuro, who usually listens to every word spoken during these damned meetings. But you seem to be pretty interested today, even sharing some promotion ideas and amazing everyone at our table, especially me. I tried to ignore you by looking at Teru instead; he's busy doodling on our record sales charts. Still such a child, I thought and smiled to myself, but the irritable mood you caused was still there. Being in the same room with you was bothering me bit by bit and I wish I'd brought my laptop to distract me.

Why do you have to be so perfect, anyway?

Masahide-san finally adjourns the meeting and I silently screamed out of joy. Now I can go home and forget about you. I took my coat off the rack and slipped it over my shoulders. Bending down, I grasped the handle of my guitar case but then felt someone's hand tapping me from behind. I straightened up and turned around, ready give whoever that dared to bother me after such a long-ass meeting a death glare right in the eyes. But I blinked, stunned at what I saw -- there you stood, carrying your bass, shifting from side to side and peering at me from under your lashes.

"Ano..." you started, but then scratched your head, looking a little embarrassed for some reason. Nonetheless, you smiled that same boyish smileyou'd always throw to everyone, even to someone like me and went on with what you had to say. "Hisashi, do you think I could get a ride home with you? Teru brought me here but he's being called away to an emergency." You want a ride home from me? No, I can't let it happen. It would be likeTemptation knocking at my door. Wait a sec -- did you just say that Teru brought you here? I couldn't help but feel a little jealous as I imagined youtwo in Teru's car, sharing jokes and laughing all the way. I shook my head, clearing away that thought and asked about Takuro. "What about Takuro?" Then you laugh, your embarrassment immediately diminishing as you explained to me about Takuro. "Believe it or not, our 'leader-san' has a date tonight." "A date?" I asked. That was definitely something new. Well, I'm happy for Takuro. At least he has somebody to spend time with. "So...will you give me a ride home?" You turn your pleading eyes to me and I just couldn't refuse such a look. "Ok, I'll take you home. Good thing that I'm heading your way or else I'd just tell you to take the train."

Such a damn weak willpower I have...

"Arigatou ne! Let's head out to your car!" And you skip on ahead with me trailing slowly behind you. Why did this have to happen to me?

I finally make it to my car, but you're already there, waiting for me to unlock the doors. I set down my guitar and went to open the trunk, telling youto put our instruments in there and going over to the driver's side. I step in and start the engine then hear you shut the trunk. You bounded over to theother door, opening it and hopping in then put your seatbelt on with a 'click.' We pull out of the parking lot and onto the highway, driving away into the
night. You reach out to turn on the radio, trying to find something to listen to.

Messing with my presets already, huh? And I don't particularly mean my radio.

We drive on and eventually, you settled for some soft jazz music.

"I never knew you liked jazz," I said conversationally, then looked back to switch lanes. A small smile graced your lips. "Jazz music's very soothing...Besides, there are a lot of things you don't know about me." I blinked and stared at you, but you seem to be looking out the window at something. Perhaps the moon...My eyes turned to your elfin face then wandered down to the pale, slender neck and lingered there. You turn your head around suddenly, surprising me and I look back at the road. I see our exit and signaled left, turning down a ramp and onto the smaller road while taking a deep breath and sighing, trying to calm myself. You almost caught me admiring you again, you know that? I snuck another peek and saw you twirling a finger around a lock of golden hair, swaying slightly to the soft music and I licked my lips, my eyes greedily drinking in the sight of you. Something so innocent about you... Do you know how sexy you are?

I studied your profile for a while -- right from your perfectly shaped eyebrows down to your round cheeks and pouty lips. Utterly captivating... You must have sensed me looking again and you turned your whole body around to stare at me. I couldn't avert my gaze in time and found myself looking intoyour questioning eyes. Lost in your dark depths, I completely forgot that I was still driving and that we were nearing your street. I manage to turn away in the end, but not before noticing the small blush that had appeared on your cheeks. I coughed awkwardly to break the spell and turned my attention back to the street signs, almost missing a turn to your street.

Sssscccreeeeecchhh!!!

"Whoa! I think I got whiplashed!" You joked and laughed. "Very funny, Jiro. See if I ever give you a ride home again." Did I just say that? "Oh, oh, gomen, gomen! I was just kidding." You're smiling at me again and my grip tightened on the steering wheel. I pull up in front of your apartment andput the car in park, the soft music still playing on the radio. We sit together for a minute longer and then you unbuckle your seat belt, turning to me once
more. It's silly, but I feel as if I was driving home one of my past girlfriends... Heh, and the next thing I'll be expecting is a goodnight kiss or for you to invite me up...Well, you can't blame a guy for wishing.

"Um, thanks for taking me home, Hisashi," you said, not even knowing how hard I was trying to keep in control. I was still gripping the steering wheel...and I don't think I'll let it go anytime soon, not with you there right next to me, looking so sweet and kissable... "It's no big deal, Jiro." I popped the trunk open. "Ok, I'll be going then."

You open the door and step out onto the sidewalk, running around to the back to retrieve your bass and then closing the trunk. I was surprised as you ran to my window and knocked on the glass. I pressed a button and the window automatically rolled down, revealing your bright face beaming at me.
"Hey, you wanna go do something tomorrow?"

"Uh...sure. What do you have in mind?" My heart was racing. Stay still, damn you!

"I don't know yet, but I'll think of something. Can I call you tomorrow?"

"Ok," I smile myself and look at the genuine smile spreading on your face.

"Great! I'll see you later! Ja ne!" And you ran off to your apartment door, unlocking and opening it then switched on the light. My stare lingered on yourform even as you waved to me and disappeared inside, shutting your door. Rolling the window back up, I put the car in gear and headed for home.

The jazz music was still on so I turned it up, suddenly finding a liking for jazz myself. I smiled again and thought about you during my drive home. Someone to spend time with, I thought with amusement. Maybe I am getting close to reaching you...and getting past the miserable feeling I felt was perhaps the first step. But there's no denying one thing, Jiro --

My eyes love you.

O-Wari! ^_~