LIFE AND TIMES OF THE
TONY BERMUDA TRIO
( by Yannick Lemay)
This incredible adventure began with Tony when he lived in Rouyn-Noranda, a cold place in North-Western Québec. Once known as INFERNALISUCCUBUSOCCULTUM with his brother Gaetan, he went on to pursue his own career that would lead him to unconcievable heights in his own mind and so he became the one we all of course know for gifting us with MORSECORE and the Words Of The Walrus!
After his brother was flattened by some 18wheeler carrying frozen pancakes, Tony decided it was time to build an Empire of his own image and so went to study to ways of the Walrus way up north. Meanwhile, drummer Jérôme Gendron had formed the extremist nudist-origamist hardcore punk band in Montreal called LOBOTOMIZED. It is during a show Tony asked Jérôme if he wanted to rejoin him on his new path to domination.
So Jérôme joined and together they started making new stuff.
It is sometimes in 1987 that they stumbled upon Edgar, who had arrived in Canada from Cambodia. He and his friends were in this fucked up mess of a band called TÊTE DE VACHE (although it appears they initially meant DEATH MACHINE but they couldn't read or write). After they performed some great sort-of songs such as "Gâchis Plein d'Bave" (which they thought actually meant "I see pure sav"), "Fabien Dans Le Rave" (they believed they were saying 'Fat bitch in the grave'), Tony went to talk to Edgar and in a few minutes discussion he realized Edgar was a clandestine who was in the truck who hit his brother on the highway, eating frozen pancakes to survive and using the boxes as poor-man's sheets.
They almost got in a fight, but Jérôme broke it up. Nowadays, shortly after, the three of them were gathered to record the amazingly irritating "Hommage Aux Morses" a true unclassic!!! Still my unfavourite today!
All together, they toured this planet's most insignificant places to gather some fame and spread the Walrus Chronicles with success through their Morsecore Art Redefined Devastating Estheticism. Then came a point were Jérôme wouldn't feel fit for this adventure anymore and after a short argument with the band left to joined the unholy evil sons of the Black Walrus Metal scene. I summon AURA BLAST! Jérôme came back to appear on some songs afterwards but he was replaced by drummer extraordinaire Antime Joanis.
Antime initially comes from Trois-Rivières but ended up somewehre in Guelph,Ontario playing in a waltz-funk band where all members but him were Arabians and singing exclusively in japanese.... Tony Bermuda Associtates agents discovered him during their world-wide operation called "Drumhunter 2.0".
BUT.... Before Antime was brought to the band, an oddball from somewhere in between Moscow and Chernobyl, Russia, joined the band by force. Yes, Alexei Romalenkov threatened the band with a gun that has a canon as long as my fucken arm! They didn't really have a choice other than let him in. He pretended to be a clean buisinessman, but is any buisinessman clean ?
So together they recorded the weird "Trompette Métal Slaughter" with Tony on drums, Alexei on guitar and Edgar on vocals and flute, harmonica and other shit. This happened right after the "No Towings Allowed" ep was recorded with Putride from the band Gut Puking Motherfuckers on guitars and Jérôme as a session drummer while Edgar was undergoing his 81st plastic surgery to rearrange his face since it had been traumatisingly mauled during an accident involving a car frame, a pissed off client and Edgar's own Walrus.
Then came time to rehearse new material for what will be reissued as "Morse Metal". It should surface a bit after the band's two splits with Gut Puking Motherfuckers, one recorded in 2000 and the other in 2003. These are pure pieces Walrus great shit! The first one is truly unlistenable, somewhere between noise and music, and the newest features each band covering the other and playing some of their own songs. It is important to hear Tony Bermuda Trio playing GPM's grindcore/metal stuff unplugged (and never want to listen to it aggain).
So this is it for right now, HAIL THE WALRUS OR DIE!