monday, april 26th, 2004
i have to bring my grades up...i have to figure out where i'm going to get a job this summer...i have to figure out where i'm going to college...i have to figure out how to "get my life back" as my mother tells me...
friday, april 23rd, 2004
lets see, parents finally home=back to the yelling and stress and added anxiety. Detention to serve (for a tardy..of all things), projects to finish, people to deal with, grades to raise. Summer now seems impossible to get to. And i have to get a job this summer..and i really have no desire to work.
Last rally of the year was today, it all went downhill..colorguard's performance was pitiful compared to last years. i felt bad for them :/
anyway..
Its terrible when someone eggs you on, to the point where you can't stand it. You feel attacked, provoked, and completely misunderstood. Lets randomly start picking a firght with Sarah cause they feel like it...
That guy is a depressed bastard who wants to put others down in an attempt to make others feel inferior to him, thats what.
It just takes one person, to say the most precise words, that really hits the spot. Feelings are really fragile and maybe thats easy to forget when we're upset. But to hurt them without any justification in the first place..well.
Its a sad thing when they say something to the point where I start crying like the little girl I am, shaking even, because something so stupid bothered me so much.
You can't change who you are. If someone doesn't like you for being who you are, they just shouldn't say anything...
I got my feelings hurt, whether I'm being overly sensitive or not.
"You are happy making youself miserable"
"low self-esteem and you thrive on it"
"I am tired of hearing it, plus you dont want to improve the situation."
Well, where the hell did all this come from????? Send me a message out of nowhere hammering down everything you dislike about me like that, when i had not said anything offensive or self-pitying to you in the first place? I rarely talked to him, never made my problems his issue...
I'm always going to be mad about this one.
No one knows who I'm talking about, but i hate them. You just can't say anything anymore, I learned from this one. Trying to put others before you and be nice to people doesn't do shit. The end.
monday, april 19th, 2004
Dear highschool, i hate you
saving your essay to do till midnight, before its due, is pure beauty. i congradulate myself on managing to maintain this consistency all 3 years i've been in highschool. see? i am consistent, there's my good life-essential skills right there.
was looking back on my true laziness in highschool, i found an
old doodle i scanned in last year one day from sitting in math class. man does my mind wander sometimes.
i got called into the attendence office today, cause they can't track notes properly and gave me a truancy for no reason since they lose my notes. thank you for making my first day back after spring break even worse, office ladies.
i was sick all break. except for 24 hours i spent with b and aimee, dealing with movie theaters that lie to you and steal your donuts. its a long story, but we saw [the first showing of] kill bill 2 and that is what matters. le yay.
Its 3am now, i better finish that essay.
saturday, april 10th, 2004
I'm really bored, and dont have anything of any importance to say at the moment.
bleef
someone care to amuse me? this weekend is going to suck. Easter is my
least favorite holiday. dododo.
