Intermission

As soon as the audience can no longer see them, the cast runs offstage to relax for a few minutes in their dressing rooms. Roses and John are sharing one. Roses is sitting in front of her mirror, re-applying her lipstick. John is styling his hair.

Roses: I just don’t understand how we managed to get stuck in the same dressing room.

John: I know. How unlucky can you get?

Roses: Hey!

John: Oh…um…I was talking about you, of course. You’re unlucky. Not me. Um…right.

Roses: That’s better. The show seems to be going rather well.

John: Yeah, better than we predicted. Master of the Fort was very popular.

Roses: Of course it was, I wrote it.

The door is suddenly slammed open. Ann walks in.

Ann: Speaking of writing, why was “one day more” all I had to say in that last song? I was bored.

Roses: John wrote that one, I had nothing to do with it. You seem…annoyed. It’s not just because of that, is it?

Ann: No. I’m sharing a room with Rosey and Sally.

Roses: That explains it; say no more.

The door flies open again. Ian storms in. Silent Jim follows him.

Ian: I demand to know what is going on!

Roses: We’re talking.

Ian: No, not that. This!

He pulls out a letter and hands it to John. John reads it aloud.

John: Dear Ian, King of Unparalled Nastiness, I am writing in regards to your performance so far. I feel that it is a little lacking. Maybe you should allow Silent Jim to play your part. If you choose to disregard this note, a disaster beyond your imagination will occur. Mwhahaha!!!! Signed, your humble patron, OG…OG? Who is that?

Ian: I don’t care who it is! He’s criticizing my performance, that ******! Like Silent Jim could do a better job playing me than I do!

Silent Jim shrugs.

Roses: OG. Sounds familiar. Maybe….nah. There’s not even a chandelier in this theater.

John: And besides, this is Dark Shadow’s handwriting.

Before they can say anything else, the door is pushed open again. Tyrael enters.

Tyrael: It’s crowded in here.

Ann: So go back to your room; what’s the problem there?

Tyrael: Holli and Tails are playing the “Keep Tyrael Out Of The Bathroom Game.” I was going to go next door and use yours, but the door was locked.

Ann: I think Rosey said Sally needed a quick shower.

Tyrael: Oh. Can I use this one?

Roses: Sure, go ahead.

Tyrael squeezes between Ian and Silent Jim, trips over Ann’s feet, makes it to the bathroom, and locks the door. Jan and Ili, walking down the hallway, stop and stand in the doorway.

John: What do you two want?

Jan: Nothing.

Ili: We certainly didn’t stop to talk to you.

Jan: Hey, Ann, you going to that family reunion this year?

Ann: Maybe, if we don’t play that game where we---

A scream down the hallway cuts off her sentence. Roseidous, wearing only a towel, runs by the door. Holli and Tails can be heard laughing. Roses glances at her watch, then goes and sticks her head out the door.

Roses: Holli! Tails! I’m very disappointed in you. It took you a whole 12 minutes to make him scream. You can do so much better. Practice more tomorrow.

She turns around to everyone in the dressing room. Ann has stolen her seat. Suddenly, from in the bathroom, Tyrael shrieks and flings the door open. It hits John. Roses sighs.

Tyrael: Katherine was hiding behind the shower curtain!

Katherine walks out, grinning evilly. Roses ignores her.

Roses: Okay people, two minutes to curtain. Go get in your places. Yes, Tyrael. Holli and Tails will let you be the Scotty dog.

Tyrael: How’d you know I was going to ask?

Roses: Just go. I’m getting a headache.

They all leave, except John and Roses, who stare at each other.

John: Well, let’s only hope that the second act goes as well as the first did.

Roses: It better. And Rosey had better be dressed.

They get up and walk down the hallway towards the stage.

Roses: That was a nice fall into the orchestra pit, by the way.

John: Thanks, it wasn’t even supposed to happen.

Roses: Yeah, I know. Just don’t tell people that.

John: Right.

They arrive at the stage and take their places as the music starts up again.