~*~Hour 1~*~Radek Zelenka looked up from his analysis of the storm on the heads-up display of Jumper One. He sighed and turned to the man in the pilot's seat. "I hope you are not claustrophobic, Major."
John Sheppard looked up from the controls with surprise. "No, why?"
Radek gestured to the HUD. "This storm is several kilometers wide in each direction. I doubt we would be able to leave here before tomorrow at the earliest."
John examined the HUD. "Looks like you're right, Dr. Zelenka." He keyed his radio. "Ford, this is Sheppard."
"Go ahead, Major."
"There's a nasty storm that's about to hit us over on this continent. Zelenka, McKay and I are going to stay here in the jumper until it passes, probably tomorrow. Inform Atlantis that we'll be late, would you?"
"You sure you can't fly out of there, sir?" Ford asked.
"Negative. This hit us from pretty much out of nowhere, Lieutenant, and I really don't want to risk the jumper in flight with the lightning I'm seeing. We'll be fine here. I'll check in with you in a few hours. But if the storm hits there, get your asses back to Atlantis."
"Understood, sir. Ford out."
John turned to Radek, but Rodney commented first. "What, no courteous inquiries as to whether or not I'm claustrophobic?"
Radek turned back to Rodney, who was stowing away the field gear. "I know you are not fond of small spaces, Rodney, but at least we are not trapped in the Stargate," Radek said.
"He's got a point, McKay."
"We're in the middle of a storm, Major. High winds, small jumper, possibility of the jumper flying not under its own power?"
John rolled his eyes. "Beckett, Teyla and Ford survived the mother of all storms on Atlantis in a jumper without being blown away -- we'll be fine."
Rodney made a disbelieving noise and went back to double-checking the gear. Radek murmured under his breath in Czech. John gave a short bark of laughter before answering back, causing Rodney to look up and frown.
"When did you learn Czech?"
John shrugged. "Figured knowing an Eastern Bloc language would come in handy. My college offered Czech."
Rodney tilted his head. "How cute was the professor?"
John looked at Radek. "I'm not sure anyone would ever accuse the men's lacrosse coach of being cute, especially since he'd been a linebacker in college."
"So you actually took a course for the knowledge imparted." Rodney sounded disbelieving.
"I took a lot of courses for the knowledge imparted, McKay," John said testily. "Even Kirk had to graduate from Starfleet Academy, you know, cheating on the Kobayashi Maru test notwithstanding." John spun in the pilot's seat, crossing his arms and staring out the windshield.
Radek looked at Rodney, who had a stunned, almost hurt, expression on his face. Radek got up and patted Rodney on the arm. "I want you to see those readings I got in that cave," he said, drawing the astrophysicist away from the front of the jumper.
~*~Hour 4~*~
"You're running out of time," Rodney warned Radek.
Radek waved his hand vaguely as he studied the chess game on the data pad's screen. John stood behind Radek, rummaging for something in their supplies. Rodney and Radek were sitting on the floor between the bench seats.
"Cannot run out of time," John remarked. "There is infinite time. You are finite. Zathras is finite. This is . . . wrong tool." John dropped something on the bench seat.
Rodney frowned as Radek began to laugh. "What?" Rodney asked irritably.
"Not the one," Radek said with a smirk as he moved one of his pieces with the stylus.
John grinned down at Radek, a bottle of water in his hand. "You take, Zathras die. You leave, Zathras die. Either way, is bad for Zathras."
"What in the world are you two going on about?" Rodney scowled as he moved one of his pieces.
Radek moved one of his own as he spoke. "Zathras is used to being beast of burden to other people's needs. Very sad life. Probably have very sad death, but at least there is symmetry." He pushed his glasses up. "And checkmate."
Rodney's scowl deepened as he stared at the screen. He hit the 'resign' button with force and stood. "You two are impossible." He looked up as thunder grumbled over head.
"No boom today . . . boom tomorrow. There's always a boom tomorrow," John said solemnly.
Radek nodded. "Ivanova is God."
Rodney threw his hands up. "I give up."
~*~Hour 6~*~
"That's easy -- not prime. 93,983."
Radek rolled his eyes at Rodney. "Prime. Major: 104,711."
"Prime," John called from the pilot's seat, where he had his feet up on the wall, watching the rain lash against the windshield.
Rodney and Radek waited for the major to call out a number, but he just stared out at the storm. Finally Rodney shrugged and turned to Radek. "Shall we just leave him alone?"
Radek frowned, but sighed. "Your turn, Rodney."
Rodney nodded, but he was looking back at John, his face reflecting a myriad of emotions Radek wasn't sure he wanted to put a name to.
For some reason, Radek felt . . . jealous. He just wasn't sure whether he was jealous of John for getting that look, or of Rodney for giving it to John.
~*~Hour 11~*~
Rodney was curled up in the sleeping bag on the floor next to the hatch, lightly snoring. Radek was going back over his data from their exploration of the nearby caverns. John lay on the bench seat across from Radek, his hands folded across his stomach. He stared at the ceiling.
"Koruna for your thoughts."
John turned his head to look at Radek. "You'd get a lot of change back."
Radek smiled. "I do not think so. Despite what Rodney and the others think, you are not nearly as unintelligent as you pretend to be."
"Oh." John looked . . . distressed.
"Sometimes, masks are useful, no?" Radek shrugged. "Sometimes, despite being able to speak English perfectly, one likes to pretend he doesn't in order to encourage people to explain things in simpler terms," he said, glancing over at Rodney.
John gave Radek a half-smile. "Yeah, masks are useful."
"Perhaps," Radek said in Czech, "I could prevail upon you to assist me with my more difficult calculations sometime? My engineering Ph.D. is not proof against math errors."
John nodded. "Since you asked," he responded in Czech, "I'll be more than happy to help. So long as it's Atlantis-related and not something you brought from Earth. Unless, of course, I'm getting credit on the paper," he clarified with a grin.
"Hrm, I'm not sure my University will allow me to give credit to a U.S. Air Force major." Radek continued speaking Czech, since John knew the language. It was nice to speak to someone who understood his native tongue, and was willing to speak back in it.
"Lucky for me I've got a Ph.D. to back up the rank," John replied.
"Really?" Radek was stunned. He knew John was good with math, but hadn't thought the man had done graduate work, much less Ph.D. level. Then again, he wasn't sure of the educational requirements for promotion in the Air Force. "What and from where?"
"Mathematical physics, M.I.T. And if you tell McKay, I'll personally serve you up as hovezí polévka s játrovými knedlícky in the mess."
Radek snickered. "You wouldn't."
"Wanna bet?" John asked with another grin, one of devilish amusement. Radek still didn't think John would carry through on the threat to turn him into beef soup with liver dumplings, but John did like his privacy.
"I promise, I will not tell Rodney that you are Major John Sheppard, Ph.D."
John nodded, still grinning. John's stomach growled and John and Radek looked at each other before laughing.
"I had to talk about food," John said, letting his head fall back onto the seat.
"We could raid Rodney's Power Bar stash," Radek suggested.
John shook his head. "I'm not that brave -- or that hungry."
"Will you two quit yapping? Some of us are trying to sleep, and the Czech accents aren't helping," Rodney mumbled into his pillow.
~*~Hour 15~*~
John was sleeping at the back of the jumper, while Rodney and Radek sat in the forward compartment, going over their notes from their explorations of this continent. They had left the rest of the team closer to the gate and flown a low orbit pass over the planet, encountering some odd energy readings as they flew over this area. They'd landed to do a quick survey, and had been ready to head back when the storm blew up.
The storm had not let up in intensity. Rodney took readings with one of the spare datapads. If the storms were something that happened often, this planet would not make a good alpha site for them. With the Wraith breathing down their necks all the time, they always needed spare alpha sites.
"So, what was up with you and the major and your little Czech fest from earlier?" he asked now.
Radek shrugged. "It's nice to be able to talk to someone in my native language," he said. "Since you were asleep, we could do so without being rude."
"Huh. Didn't know if something else was going on between the two of you," Rodney said, not looking at Radek. He could feel Radek looking at him, though.
"Like what?"
Rodney shrugged. "Don't ask, don't tell," he said.
There was a moment of shocked silence, then Radek said, "Aren't you the one who calls him Captain Kirk? Kirk was after all the girls, if I recall right."
"Bah. That was a front for the Neanderthal admirals at Starfleet. He was jumping Spock's bones every night."
Radek's eyebrows rose. "They must have run a different version of Star Trek in Canada."
Rodney waved his hand. "It was there, if you knew to look for it. Kinda like you and the major."
"There is nothing between Major Sheppard and myself other than a working relationship and, perhaps, a bit of friendship."
Rodney cocked his head. "Radek, I can see how you look at him." Rodney would like to have one of the other two men look at him like that, but he'd seen the expression in John's eyes when he and Radek had spoken in Czech at the start of the storm. Combine that with Radek's looks, and Rodney knew he was odd man out.
"I see how you look at him, too, Rodney."
They looked at each other, then back down to their datapads, losing themselves in their work.
A soft chuckle caused Rodney look up at Radek, who was regarding him thoughtfully. "If the major is Kirk, and I am Spock," Radek said, "does that make you Bones?"
"Hey, why are you Spock?" Rodney asked indignantly.
"You are too emotional to be Vulcan," Radek replied calmly.
A Power Bar came flying from the back of the jumper to collide with the windshield. "McKay is Scotty, since he tends to pulls miracles out of his ass," came John's grumpy voice. "But I'm denying I ever said that when we get back to Atlantis. Can I get some quiet so I can sleep now?"
Rodney knew he was grinning like an idiot, but didn't care. He did get up and close the bulkhead doors between the compartments, getting a muffled "thank you" for his efforts.
Radek shook his head when Rodney sat back down. "I still think you are Bones."
"I thought Beckett was Bones."
Radek tilted his head, then nodded. "This is true."
"If the major is Kirk and Starfleet didn't have any female captains in Kirk's time, what does that make Elizabeth?"
"Federation President."
"Ah, good point," Rodney conceded. "Hey, did you get that anomalous reading in grid 5X31?"
~*~Hour 18~*~
"You realize that Ford will be put out if you tell him I'm sleeping with Zelenka." John leaned back in the pilot's chair and watched Rodney.
Rodney looked up, eyes wide with surprise . . . or was that fear? "Um, wait, when did I say you were sleeping with Zelenka?"
"The whole 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' thing before your Star Trek conversation. And how do you not know the good quotes from Babylon 5, anyway?"
"I wasn't thrilled with the first season of that show and stopped watching, and you heard us?" Rodney swallowed. Yep, that was definitely fear in his eyes.
"I heard most of that conversation. You know there's a pool on when you and I either will start sleeping together or did start sleeping together. Ford keeps telling me to not put the moves on you until it's his week."
"Oh please, they're actually betting on whether or not you and I are sleeping together?"
John gave a feral grin. "There's several pools, actually. One for you and me, one for Teyla and me, Elizabeth and me, Elizabeth and you, Teyla and you --"
"So in other words, the speculation about my sex life is better than the real thing has ever been," Rodney said archly.
"Isn't that always the case?" John asked with a sigh.
"Yeah." Rodney went back to his datapad. "If I had a dollar for every time I was accused of sleeping with someone I actually wasn't sleeping with, well, I could have bought better lab equipment for the trip."
John chuckled. How like Rodney to be thinking of better equipment. "I don't know what I would have done with mine. Retired and bought my own helicopter, maybe, after Afghanistan."
"I thought you liked being at McMurdo."
John nodded. "I liked McMurdo, yeah. I didn't like the reason I was sent there."
Rodney looked up, his eyes searching John's face. He seemed to understand that was as much as John was willing to say on that subject.
John stretched. "Any ideas on when the storm might subside?"
The HUD lit up, and Rodney gestured to it. "I'm thinking we're gonna be here a while."
"Damn. I was hoping we be back at Atlantis by now. I don't like this."
"Me neither, Major," Rodney replied, still peering at the readout.
~*~Hour 21~*~
"So, Major, we are sleeping together?"
John was glad he hadn't started drinking before Radek asked that question. "Um, that seems to be Rodney's conclusion. Personally, I think I'd remember having had sex any time in the past few months."
Radek smiled. "I would hope so. I would like to think I'm fairly memorable. My last partner certainly had no complaints."
John quirked an eyebrow. "Anyone I know?"
Radek shook his head as he swallowed his drink of water. "It was back on Earth, Major. Before Antarctica."
"Okay, this talk about your sex lives? Really, really disturbing." Rodney bit off another bite of his Power Bar.
"Our lack of sex lives, you mean?" John asked.
"Oh please, Major, you got laid when the glowy alien priestess was on Atlantis."
"Chaya," John stressed her name, "and I did not have sex. Some making out, some glowy sharing thing on Proculus, but no actual sex."
"That is more than I needed to know." Radek contemplated his MRE. Rodney merely looked skeptical. John took a bite of his own MRE.
"Define 'actual sex."
"What are you, Kenneth Starr?" John looked at Rodney. "And why are you so interested in whether or not I got some? You were the one who passed up the chance with Aliana."
"At least she wasn't an ascended Ancient." Rodney crossed his arms.
"No, she merely decided that since we weren't born on Atlantis, she could freely take the ZPM we needed, and gee, she found out we weren't from Atlantis from, oh, you."
"Gentlemen --" Radek tried to interrupt.
"Excuse me for not wanting to lie to possible allies in the war against the Wraith. I like to think we're a little better than the Genii, Major."
"You couldn't have decided to exercise some discretion instead?"
"Like you did with Chaya?"
"Major, McKay --" Radek tried to get in between John and Rodney, who were both on their feet.
"You were the one who screwed the pooch by scanning her, McKay, and making her not trust us."
"She wasn't exactly telling us the truth, and you were thinking with the wrong head as usual, Captain Kirk!"
The bulkhead door hissed shut, and the two men turned, realizing that Radek had disappeared into the front of the jumper.
Rodney blinked, walking over to the release and opening the door. Radek sat in the co-pilot's seat, watching the rain.
"Radek?" Rodney asked tentatively.
"I thought I would give the two of you the privacy you needed to either kill each other or fuck each other senseless." Radek's voice was off, in John's opinion. He and Rodney looked at each other.
"Sorry, Dr. Zelenka," John said sincerely. "I think the close quarters are starting to get to us."
Radek shrugged. "The two of you fight all the time. It is inevitable that you will either kill each other or start sleeping together. How is it Dr. Simpson puts it? Oh yes, you two are 'so married'." He still hadn't looked away from the storm.
John tried to defuse the situation with humor. "You and McKay don't even need full sentences to talk to each other. I think that's a bit more 'married' than McKay and I are."
There was no response from Radek for a long time. Rodney gave John a worried look. John shrugged helplessly, not understanding what was going on. He moved to sit in the passenger seat behind Radek, putting a hand on the man's shoulder.
"Whatever we did, I apologize," John said in Czech.
"It's hard," Radek replied, also in Czech, "to be trapped in a small space with two men whom one desires, and see that they desire each other, not you."
John blinked, surprised. "I . . . had no idea."
Radek shrugged. "You are military, so I never intended to let you know. As for Rodney, I was afraid of losing our friendship if he did not feel the same . . .and then I saw how the two of you acted."
"What's going on?" Rodney asked quietly, when the silence stretched for a while. John looked up at him, not sure he had the right to tell Rodney in English what Radek had told him in Czech.
"It is all right, Major," Radek said in English. "I will be fine."
John switched back to English as well. "Right," he drawled. "Pining after a friend is 'all right'," he added with a pointed look at Rodney. Rodney's eyes widened as he caught John's diversionary implication.
"Radek?" he asked.
Radek shot John a glare before turning to Rodney, who was still looking stunned. "Yes, Rodney," he replied. "I like you as more than a friend."
"I had no idea," Rodney replied, unaware that he was echoing John's words from earlier.
"That was the point," Radek said.
John got up and moved toward the back of the jumper, intending to give the two men privacy. He had a hard enough time keeping the respect of his men just as an Air Force officer in charge of a bunch of Marines. He couldn't afford to indulge his bisexuality with even one man who caught his fancy, let alone two. Chaya, for all that she had been an alien priestess, had been safe. Teyla, or Dr. Simpson, or even Dr. Biro, whose morbid sense of humor John liked, would be a better choice if he needed an outlet. Sleeping with Rodney or Radek would not only put John into a highly unpleasant situation, but also open his partner up to ridicule, or worse, by the Marines. John had a feeling their science colleagues might be a little more open-minded about the idea.
The front of the jumper was quiet, so John dared a look over his shoulder. Rodney and Radek were in each other's arms, kissing. Rodney's hands threaded through Radek's hair, and Radek's hands gripped Rodney's biceps. John felt like he'd been punched in the gut, even as he got hard.
Looking away, he busied himself with the supply bags they had opened, making a mental inventory of what would need to be replaced when they returned to Atlantis. He focused on the task, not wanting to hear any sounds that might be coming from the front of the jumper.
A touch on his arm made him jump, and he spun around to see the other two behind him. Before John could speak, Radek had pulled John's head down into a kiss. Radek's tongue pushed into John's mouth when he began to protest. The protest became a small whimper as his brain lost the fight to his hormones.
Radek broke off the kiss and moved down to John's neck, licking and sucking. John only had a second to catch his breath before Rodney's mouth was on his own, Rodney's tongue in his mouth. The taste was different, but no less sweet. Rodney's fingers stroked through John's hair.
When Rodney broke off the kiss, John stared at him. Radek pulled back to look at John as well.
"He wants both of us," Rodney said in a low voice. "I want both of you. The only question is, do you want both of us?"
John looked from Rodney to Radek, seeing the genuine desire in both sets of blue eyes. He should shake his head no, let them have the back of the jumper to themselves and watch the storm rage outside. He shouldn't sleep with either of them, much less both.
He had sublimated his longing for Rodney into their acerbic friendship, but that kiss had broken down the barrier. His feelings for Radek were newer, but no less powerful. His head told him to back away, his heart told him to take the chance -- they were in another fucking galaxy. It was hard enough to find someone on Earth; finding two men on Atlantis who wanted you was a godsend.
John licked his lips before kissing Radek and then Rodney lightly. "I hope one of you is really good at logistics," he said hoarsely. "This threesome thing is kinda new to me."
Rodney looked positively delighted, and Radek smirked. "I think we can work things out, no?" Radek asked as he pulled John's shirt out from his pants and pushed it up John's chest. John lifted his arms to allow the shirt to come all the way off. Radek tossed it on the seat and slid his hands back down to tweak John's nipples. Rodney made a soft noise at the sight.
"You could join us, Rodney," Radek said with a hint of humor. Rodney seemed to need no further encouragement, stripping off his own shirt before tackling Radek's. The three of them moved closer, hands running over hard muscle and softer flesh as they traded kisses almost lazily. John sighed when Radek began to suck on John's neck as Rodney kissed him.
John gave each of their backs a last stroke before moving his hands to Rodney's pants. "I think this might work better naked," he said with a low laugh.
"Hmm," Radek hummed. "It might."
Rodney was just staring at where Radek was still sucking on John's neck -- low enough that his shirt should hide the bruise that would surely result. John unbuttoned and unzipped Rodney's pants and tugged at them. "Rodney, you might want to take your boots off," he warned.
"What? Oh. Oh!" Rodney popped out of his daze and moved back a step to lean over and take off his boots. John squeezed Radek's ass.
"We might want to get naked, Radek," he murmured in Czech, surprised he was still coherent enough to speak the language.
"Hm? Radek looked up at him, blinking. "Ano," he replied, then said in English, "yes, naked."
As the two of them stripped, Rodney pulled over the sleeping bag and unzipped it all the way. He arranged it on the floor of the jumper, then lay down on it, propping his head on a fist. John tossed his pants onto the seat and stared at Rodney, appreciating the contrast of his tanned arms to the pale skin of the rest of his body, the lines of muscle under the skin, and the fact that Rodney was definitely aroused. As John stared at Rodney's erection, it gave a little twitch.
"Don't make me start by myself," Rodney warned with a slight smile.
"Wouldn't dream of it, Rodney," John said as he knelt on the sleeping bag. "We'd never hear the end of it."
"We'd never get in the end of him, either," Radek said as he knelt down.
John groaned and Rodney shook his head. Rodney reached out to run an appreciative hand over Radek's cock, then John's. "Unfortunately," he said, "that might have to wait until we're back on Atlantis, with a bit more room. And lube," he added. Rodney then moved onto his back. "But feel free to worship me in other ways."
John glanced at Radek, who was shaking his head. Rodney frowned at them. "It's cold in here," he complained.
Radek smiled before moving so that he was between Rodney's legs, his hands braced on either side of Rodney's hips. Rodney cried out when Radek took his cock in his mouth. John watched in fascination for a moment, idly stroking himself. Radek looked as focused on sucking Rodney as he did when working on Ancient devices.
"John." Rodney's voice was low and hoarse with desire. He reached out a hand to lightly touch John's cock again, and John groaned, moving to straddle Rodney's head so Rodney could suck on him as he watched Radek suck Rodney. There had to be a position for a three way 69, he thought. And would that make it a 103 ½ instead? It didn't have the ring of 69, though, and then John's brain shut down as Rodney's lips closed around him, sucking him in as Rodney's tongue licked and tasted and one of Rodney's hands came up to tease John's balls.
Radek was still sucking on Rodney, seemingly lost in his actions until he looked up to where Rodney was sucking John. John could hear Radek moan around Rodney's cock, echoed in Rodney's own moan around John's cock. John moaned himself, leaning down to suck on Rodney's stomach, needing to anchor himself somehow. The salty taste just made him crave more.
He felt Rodney's gasp a second before Rodney bucked up against Radek, a keening noise following as Rodney came. The vibrations teased John's cock until he was gasping as well, hands fisting in the sleeping bag as he came down Rodney's throat, whispering Rodney's and Radek's names into the darkness that pulsed around him.
When John could finally move, he rolled off Rodney onto his back, blinking sleepily up at Radek. Radek was stroking himself, smiling as he watched the two of them recover. John reached up with his hands, gesturing to Radek. Radek moved over to John, leaning over him the same way John had leaned over Rodney, and John opened his mouth to suck in Radek, swirling his tongue around the tip, tasting the fluid that had gathered there. He felt movement at his side, and opened eyes he didn't remember closing to see Rodney kneeling next to them, kissing Radek and stroking his chest and back. John closed his eyes again, letting himself get lost in the taste of Radek.
John sucked hard and slow for what seemed like a long time, using his tongue and lips to stimulate. His hands gripped Radek's thighs, and John relaxed his throat as he pulled Radek down further into his mouth. He felt Radek's cock swell a second before Radek came, his cries muffled by Rodney's mouth as John swallowed the hot liquid.
John opened his eyes to see Radek collapsing against Rodney. John licked Radek's now-softened cock, getting a small whimper, before he moved away. Rodney helped Radek lay down, then moved to lie on John's other side, pulling John into a long, slow kiss. Radek draped an arm over John's stomach, his head burrowing into John's shoulder. John smiled at Rodney, knowing it was probably a goofy, satiated smile. Rodney returned it before mimicking Radek, his arm on John's stomach and his head on John's shoulder. John sighed at the comfortable warmth and slid into sleep.
~*~Hour 26~*~
Radek awoke, realizing the storm had lessened. Judging by the sound outside, it would probably be safe for them to fly back to the Stargate in a few hours. Radek also realized he was cold, despite being pressed up against John's side. He slid his arm out from under Rodney's and turned away to get to his feet. It wasn't hard to find a second sleeping bag and unzip it quietly before gently laying it over his lovers. Rodney moved closer to John, who opened his eyes.
"Everything all right?" John asked in Czech.
Radek smiled, getting back under the sleeping bag. John held out his free arm and Radek moved closer so John that could wrap it around him, laying his arm over Rodney's, across John's stomach. Rodney opened his eyes, blinking at Radek.
"Everything is perfect," Radek said in English. He ran his hand down Rodney's arm as he kissed John's shoulder at the same time. Both men smiled at him, and John kissed the top of Radek's head. Rodney grabbed Radek's hand and pulled it to his mouth for a kiss.
"Everything is perfect," he said again, closing his eyes as John and Rodney murmured their agreement. The jumper was quiet except for their breathing and the sound of the rain falling outside, and Radek eventually fell asleep again.