Of course once you got married, your day-to-day interactions will almost always have changed, become more domestic. Maybe relatives or in-laws took more of your time and in many cases children entered the mix. Regardless of this evolution, almost certainly your husband’s attitude changed, didn't he?

Did he tend to ignore you?

Did more and more often something become a fight and/or an argument?

Did he become a little more selfish?

Did he start to disrespect you in private or maybe even in public?

Maybe he started to hang around his friends again or he watched television all the time or he played video games or he surfed the web continuously.

Did he become absorbed with work and work related activities?

Did he start to refuse to go with you to visit your friends and family?

Did he refuse to go with you shopping or to the places that he once loved to go along with you just to be near you?

Did the flowers and gifts stop?

Maybe he became cheap and tight with money?

Then there is the sex. Sex used to happen anywhere or anytime, used to last all night and be so exciting. Now, has it become boring, predictable and fast?

Perhaps you have asked your self, what happened to the passion? What happened to the romantic guy that you were dating? While it is unlikely that all of the above symptoms apply in your particular circumstance, I’m sure virtually every married woman will be able to point to some of the above as prevalent in her marriage.

There seems a sad inevitability in all this. Most wives assume that this is the natural course of marriage like the erosion of a rock by a river or the fading of paint in the sunlight. Love has its seasons, as John Gray reminds us in “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus”. It's folly to expect eternal springtime, perpetual romance. Most marriage counselors would agree. Divorce attorneys can be even more pragmatic. They know that once the cancer of disaffection has spread, the damage is almost always irreversible.

What if?




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