<BGSOUND SRC="eightmo2.mid" LOOP="INFINITE"> Dirty Limmericks

Hey Gang

 

The web site is going interactive! This is your chance to get involved.Captain Ron is sponsoring a team limerick writing contest. Grand prize is a pitcher of beer courtesy of olRon himself (he might even share a pint of it with you) Get your entries in quick.....Check out the limericks already submitted..... Ringer and Bubba Gump have gotten into the ring with some real doozies!

Fish

Bubba's limerick for Stinky:

We signed a new Billie named Stinky,
“More talent in just his one pinky!”
He’s taunted “You suck!”
He says its bad luck.
But it might just be due to the drinky.

Ringer's limericks:

There once was a girl in first year
Who was trying to be an engineer
She was looking to play ball
So she gave cap’n ron a call
And after the game there was beer!

The team’s character was a little bit silly
But it wasn’t long ‘fore she felt like a ‘billy
Decked out in her Hawaiian shirt
She makes a dive in the dirt
Word is Schertzer has a big willy.

With each team member and their funny name
And the determination to win each game
This girl is one happy hawaiian
And her hits will be flyin'
All the way to the Hillbilly Hall of Fame

Porn Lover's limerick:

 

No need to spread the word of the size of it,

For scientific measures prove the BIG UNIT,

So there are no tricks,

I really like big... things,

For i am Porn Lova and somewhat of an addict!

 

Charlie Brown's limericks:

 

The Hawaiian Hillbillies love the fly ball,

They try, and try, and give it their all,

If it wasn't for that ONE inning,

The 'Billies would always be winning,

They're the best dressed team in baseball!

 

BIG UNIT's limericks:

 

Here’s a rhyme, it’s for Ron, he’s our captain,

and that seventies porn he’s been trapped in.

Since the day he’s been born,

he’s been growin?some corn.

Feedin?mid-western Ho’s, as they pass him.

~The BIG UNIT

 

While Bubba Gump’s surely no rookie,

seems he’s constantly looking for nookie.

Think it’s smoke that he hurls,

‘for he tutors those girls?

Or’s he just tryin?to sell you a cookie.

 

Tractor's limericks:

 

BIG UNIT's pants are always torn,

And his girlfriend really loves porn,

She says it's not him,

She loves his Slim Jim

She just can't get enough of the corn!

 

There once was a guy named Pete,

Who had feet that were rather fleet,

He would scream out the call,

And catch the fly ball,

And if he didn't, BLLLEEEEEEETTTTTTTT!!!!!

 

The best team I played on were the Billies

They played ball and drank themselves silly

Their captain was Ron

And his hair was really long

But not as long as the BIG UNIT!

(ed: as proven by thermal imagining)

 

There once was a shortstop named Gump,

Who asked all the ladies to hump,

And when they refused,

He sat down and mused,

Maybe it’s because of my centrifugal pump!

 

A Haiku from Gump:

 

Here’s one about the mighty BIG UNIT

A sophomore pitcher, who can get the odd hit

Shacked up with Porn Lover

Surely it’s just a cover

To promote the rumors about the size of it

Bubba Gump

 

 

So e-mail your entries ASAP to:

 

keith__hernandez@hotmail.com