Chapter 26

"Help me!" I screamed in my sleep. Then I woke up and my heart was racing.

All five guys came flying into my room. Kevin was the first one in the door. He turned the light on and sat down next to me. I grabbed him and held on for dear life.

"It's okay, Pumpkin. I'm here," Kevin said while holding me.

"Me too," Brian said.

"Me three," Nick said.

"Me four," Howie said.

"Me five," A.J. said.

I let go of Kevin and looked at the guys. They were still half sleep. They looked extremely tired. "Sorry that I woke you guys up," I said.

"That's okay," Nick said.

"Are you okay?" Brian asked.

"I'm fine. Nothing to worry about," I said. Kevin just looked at me. "You guys can go back to bed now."

"Are you sure?" Howie asked.

"Yeah, I'll be fine," I said.

"Well, I'm sleeping here with you tonight, so you guys can go back to bed," Kevin said.

"Okay, now you'll be fine since Train is staying with you," A.J. said.

"Night guys," I said.

They left and closed the door behind them.

;"What was your dream about?" Kevin asked quietly.

"It was terrible," I said. "All I remember is that both Jerry and Jeff were there and so were you. I was running away from them and into your arms. But the faster I ran, the farther away you were and the closer they became to me. They both caught up to me and grabbed me," I said beginning to cry. "Kevin, I don't want to have these nightmares anymore. I'm tired of being afraid."

"Shh, it's okay," he said while rocking me. "Maybe you need some kind of closure, so you can move on with your life."

"I guess," I said.

"As soon as Jeff gets out of the hospital he has to go to jail. Maybe if you see him behind bars, it might help you to not be so afraid," he said.

"It's not so much Jeff that I'm afraid of. . .," I began.

"It's Jerry," Kevin said.

I shook my head yes.

"I'm so sorry that I didn't protect you," Kevin said.

"Please don't blame yourself," I said.

"I try not to, but sometimes I just can't help it," he said.

"But it's not your fault," I said. "Okay?"

"Okay," he said. "Maybe you need to face Jerry and tell him that you're moving on and you're no longer afraid of him. If we show up together and tell him that you have a job that you like, a lot of friends, and now me. Maybe he'll see that you're moving on. Plus, he'll hate the fact that we're together," Kevin said.

"Maybe," I said. "But unfortunately it seems as though I have to see him no matter what."

"Why do you say that?" he asked curiously.

"Because of my mom. She's ill. Kevin, she has cancer," I said crying into his arms once again. "Your mom told me that she only has a few months left to live."

"I'm so sorry Janel. I didn't know anything about it," he said.

"Why not Jerry? With all the things he's done. Why not him? My mom doesn't deserve to die," I said still crying.

"I know what you're feeling. It may be a little different situation, but the same feeling," Kevin said. "Why my dad? He was still so young. He'd never done anything. But somehow I guess this is fate, the way things are supposed to be. It took me a long time to accept that, but it's made me stronger as a person. After he died I took his advice to heart and started to do what was in my heart. I realized you don't have all the time in the world, so you have to take what little time you do have and enjoy it."

"I hope I can see some good in it, but right now there's just so much pain," I said while wiping my tears away. "I have to go back and see her, and I guess see Jerry. But you have to come with me. I can't handle this by myself."

"You know I will. I'll always be by your side," he said. "Now it's time for you to get some sleep."

"That's all I want to do. I just want to lay down and sleep forever," I said while getting back under the covers.

"Shh, don't say that," Kevin said while covering me. He handed me Cozy Bear and then got up to shut the light off. Once he did that, he came back and sat next to me. I began to lightly cry while he sat up and gently rubbed my back. He tried to comfort me so I would fall asleep.

In the morning, I woke up and Kevin's face was right in front of mine. He had his arm wrapped around me like I was his teddy bear. I smiled and then lightly kissed him on the nose. I slowly took his arm off of me and covered him. Then I got up and went out to the kitchen. The bus was quiet except for up in the front. Their driver was listening to the radio. I grabbed an orange juice and sat down. I stared out the window and watched the cars go by.

After I had been staring out the window for a while I felt a light tap on my shoulder. I turned around and saw Nick standing there. "Hi Nick," I said.

"Good morning Janel," he said.

"How come you're still not sleeping?" I asked.

"Oh, I see how it is. You're trying to get rid of me," Nick said.

"Oh no. Never," I said smiling. "I just figured you would still be sleeping since you had a long day yesterday."

"Nope. I can't sleep all hours of the day like the rest of the guys, especially Kevin," he said.

"Oh," I said. "Sit down."

"Thanks," he said as he sat down. "So what were you doing?"

"Just thinking," I said.

"About?" he asked.

"Things," I said.

"Oh, okay," he said.

"Hey, do you want to play Mario Kart? I'd really like a rematch," I said.

"Sure. But Kevin's sleeping in there," he said.

"That's okay," I said.

"But he'll get really mad if I wake him up," Nick said.

"We'll just be really quiet. And if he wakes up and blames you, you can just tell him it was my idea. Okay?" I asked.

"If you say so," Nick said while getting up.

We went in to my room and there was Kevin. He was sprawled out in the middle of the bed.

"You sit on one side of him and I'll sit on the other," I whispered to Nick.

"Okay. I'll set the game up," he said.

He went over to the t.v. and set the game up. I went and sat down on the end of the bed by Kevin's feet. I sat there staring at him sleeping. I could have just sat there and stared at him until he woke up, but Nick was talking to me.

"Here's the control," he said while handing it to me.

"Thanks," I said.

We sat there and played over and over and over again. And each time Nick won.

"Okay. I'm going to win this one," I said confidently.

"Right?!" Nick said.

"Shut up, Nicky! I'm getting better," I said.

"Oh, you had to call me Nicky," he said.

"Oooh," I said.

"Okay Shorty. That's it," he said reaching over and tickling me.

I started laughing and then tried to put him in a head lock. By this time we had pretty much forgotten about being quiet for Kevin. I was laying on top of Kevin's legs, while I was holding on to Nick's head. Nick was tickling me trying to get me to let go of him.

"Nicholas Gene Carter. You better stop tickling my girlfriend," Kevin said with his eyes still closed.

"But she has me in a head lock," Nick whined.

Kevin sat up and looked at me. I smiled at him. Then he laid back down smiling.

"Yep, she does," Kevin said.

"You're not going to help?" Nick asked.

Kevin sat up and pulled his legs out from under me.

"Help?" he asked looking at me. I smiled at him.

"Yes, please," Nick said. "She's got a death grip on me."

"Well, let's see what my grip is like," Kevin said putting Nick in a head lock while I let go.

"You said you would help?!" Nick cried.

"And I did. I helped her," Kevin said smiling.

"Okay. Ha! Ha! Very funny. Now let go," Nick said.

"Not before I tickle you," I said with an evil grin.

"No! Don't tickle me!" yelled Nick.

Then the rest of the guys came in the room to see what was going on. Howie peeked in and then he ran back out to get the camcorder. He came back in with it recording.

"Hey! A threesome!" A.J. said.

"Bone!" all three of us yelled.

"Dog pile!" Brian yelled.

Then him and A.J. jumped on top of us. I was tickling Nick and being squashed by the guys. They were all wrestling with each other. There were body parts all over the place. Then some how I ended up at the bottom of the pile with the guys on top.

"Um, guys!" I yelled.

"Yeah," they replied.

"I'm kind of at the bottom and I can't breathe," I said while laughing.

They all looked down at me and I smiled. Then they all got up at once knocking each other everywhere. I laid on the bed laughing at them.

"Howie, did you get that?" I asked while laughing.

"Yep, all of it," he said while still recording.

Then Kevin came over to me. He crawled over me and began to kiss me. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him onto me.

"As you can see, this would be Janel and Kevin making out for their audience," Howie said into the camera. Then he pointed the camera at the guys.

"Okay, first the threesome and now this. Kevin is definitely in the mood for some," A.J. said.

Both Kevin and I grabbed a pillow and threw it at him and then continued to kiss. Then Nick and Brain came and stood at the end of the bed.

"Now!" yelled Brian.

Nick and A.J. pulled Kevin off of me, while Brian pulled me away from Kevin.

"What the heck?!" I yelled while laughing.

"We were rescuing you guys," Brian said.

"Yeah we just wanted to make sure you two were still breathing," Nick said.

"How thoughtful of you guys," Kevin said.

I climbed back on the bed and walked over to Kevin. He stood at the side of the bed with his arms open. I wrapped my arms around his neck and then my legs around his waist. He put his arms around me and held me.

"Good morning Pumpkin," he said smiling.

"Good morning to you too Boo," I said. Then I kissed him on the nose.

"Okay, enough with the smoochin'. Some of us would still like to have an appetite," Brian said.

"Yeah, I'm starved," Nick said.

"What do you guys usually do for breakfast?" I asked.

"We just wait until we get to the hotel and eat there or go out," Howie said.

"Oh no," I said. "I'm making you guys breakfast just like my mom. . .used to," I said remembering her. Kevin rubbed my back and I turned and smiled at him. "My mom would make the best breakfasts', but only on Sunday mornings. Should would make everything you wanted. Right, Kevin?"

"Yep. Mama Joy's Sunday breakfasts were the best," Kevin said.

"Janel. Do you realize how many there are of us and how much we eat?" Brian asked.

"Yeah, we'll just have to stop at the store and pick up a few things. You and Kevin can help me cook," I said.

"Ha! Ha!" Nick said.

"And you, A.J., and Howie can clean up," I said.

"Oh, but," Nick said.

"No whining. You do want to eat, right?" I asked.

"Yes," Nick mumbled.

"Okay, Kevin put me down. I have to ask the bus driver to stop," I said. Then Kevin set me down on the bed.

"I'll go talk to Andy while you get dressed," Kevin said.

"Okay, that works. But you guys need to get out," I said.

"Aww, we don't get to watch?" A.J. asked.

"Um, let me think?" I said pretending to be in deep thought. "No!" I yelled. "Now get your nasty little self out of here," I said while pushing him out the door.

They all walked out and I closed the door behind them. I climbed on the other side of the bed and found my bag. I pulled out a pair of shorts. Then I found Kevin's Phat Farm T-shirt on the couch, so I decided to wear it. I got dressed and then brushed my hair back into a ponytail.