AMPHETAMINE
So Much For The Afterglow #9

She came out west
To find the sun
She lost her name
But found a new one
Amy goes to school all day
But at night in the neighborhood
They call her
Amphetamine

She is perfect in that fucked up way
That all the magazines
Seem to want to glorify these days

She looks like a teenage anthem
She looks like she used to be happy with
The girl inside

She looks so bored sometimes
She has that super pale skin
And those soft green eyes
She looks like she
Could have been happy
In a better life

She came out west
Just to break away clean
From her family and her friends
And a little girl's dream
All she wants to do every night
Is to sit beside my window
And listen to the sirens

She is perfect in that fucked up way
That all the magazines
Seem to want to glorify these days

She looks like a teenage anthem
And she looks like she should have been happy
In another life

In another life

She came out west
Just to break the spell
After three years
In a marriage from hell
Six months clean
Living sober and right
The doctors tell her
Everything will be alright

Yeah you just take your pill
And everything will be alright

She looks like a teenage anthem
She looks like a magazine girl
She looks like a teenage anthem
Like she used to be happy
In another world

She looks like a teenage anthem
She is happy with the girl inside
She looks like a teenage anthem
And looks like she could have been
Happy in another life

In another life
Happy in another life

Met her at a party
And i took her home
She is the saddest girl
That i have ever known
She wakes me up
In the middle of the night
Just to tell me
Everything will be alright
Amy smiles at me and tells me
Everything will be alright
I tell myself the same damn thing

Everyday

Everything will be alright

EVERYTHING TO EVERYONE
So Much For The Afterglow #2

You put yourself in stupid places
Yes i think you know it's true
Situations where it's easy to look down on you
I think you like to be the victim
I think you like to be in pain
I think you make yourself a victim
Almost every single day

You do what you do
You say what you say
You try to be everything to everyone
You know all the right people
You play all the right games
You always try to be
Everything to everyone

Yeah you do it again
You always do it again

You say they taught you how to read and write
They taught you how to count
I say they taught you how to buy and sell
Your own body by the pound
I think you like to be their simple toy
I think you love to play the clown
I think you blind to the fact
That the hand you hold
Is the hand that holds you down

Chorus

Spin around and fall down
Do it again
You stumble and you fall
Yeah why don't you ever learn
Spin around and fall down
Do it again
You stumble and you fall
I wonder if you will ever learn

Why don't you ever learn

Come on now
Do that stupid dance for me

You do what they tell you to do
You say what they say
You try to be
Everything to everyone

You jump through the big hoop
You play all the right games
You try to be
Everything to everyone

Spin around and fall down
Do it again
You stumble and you fall
Yeah you do it again
Spin around and fall down
Do it again
You stumble and you fall...

FATHER OF MINE
So Much For The Afterglow #6

Father of mine
Tell me where have you been
You know i just closed my eyes
My whole world disappeared
Father of mine
Take me back to the day
When i was still your golden boy
Back before you went away

I remember blue skies
Walking the block
I loved it when you held me high
I loved to hear you talk
You would take me to the movie
You would take me to the beach
You would take me to a place inside
That is so hard to reach

Father of mine
Tell me where did you go
You had the world inside your hand
But you did not seem to know
Father of mine
Tell me what do you see
When you look back at your wasted life
And you don't see me

I was ten years ole
Doing all that i could
It wasn't easy for me
To be a scared white boy
In a black neighborhood
Sometimes you would send me a birthday card
With a five dollar bill
I never understood you then
And i guess i never will

Daddy gave me a name
My dad he gave me a name
Then he walked away
Daddy gave me a name
Then he walked away
My dad he gave me a name

Father of mine
Tell me where have you been
I just closed my eyes
And the world disappeared
Father of mine
Tell me how do you sleep
With the children you abandoned
And the wife i saw you beat

I will never be safe
I will never be sane
I will always be weird inside
I will always be lame
Now i'm a grown man
With a child of my own
And i swear that i'm not going to let her know
All the pain i have known

Then he walked away
Daddy gave me a name
Then he walked away
My dad he gave me a name
Then he walked away
Daddy gave me a name
Then he walked away
My dad he gave me a name

Then he walked away

I WILL BUY YOU A NEW LIFE
So Much For The Afterglow #5

Here is the money that i owe you
So you can pay the bills
I will give you more
When i get paid again

I hate those people who love to tell you
Money is the root of all that kills
They have never been poor
They have never had the joy
Of a welfare christmas

I know we will never look back
You say you wake up crying
Yes and you don't know why
You get up and you go lay down
Inside my baby's room

I guess i'm doing ok
I moved in with the strangest guy
Can you believe
He actually thinks
That i am really alive

I will buy you a garden
Where your flowers can bloom
I will buy you a new car
Perfect shiny and new
I will buy you that big house
Way up in the west hills
I will buy you a new life

Yes i will

I know all about that other guy
The handsome man with athletic thighs
I know about the times before
With that obsessive little rich boy

They might make you think you're happy
Yeah maybe for a minute or two
They can't make you laugh
No they can't make you feel
The way that i do

Chorus

I know we can never look back

Will you please let me stay the night
No one will ever know

Chorus

I will buy you a new life

NORMAL LIKE YOU
So Much For The Afterglow #4

They said you called me maybe yesterday
I don't even have the strength
To pick up the phone
You wouldn't even know me
Since you went away
The prozac doesn't do it for me anymore

You ought to
Take your medication everyday
Be a good dog
Live life in a wonderful way

Tell me why
You want to be blind
I don't want to be
Normal like you
I know now
Everyday
I get closer
To the place inside where i can be normal too

I heard those stupid people
Talk about you again
I just have to laugh to keep from hurting bad
Their simple minds just cannot seem to understand
You are neurotic and depressed
It doesn't mean that you're sad

You walk around oblivious to everything
You wear that party dress and black mascara
Like you're queen for the day

Chorus

I will never be normal like you

You walk around oblivious to everyone
I see you walking slow and simple
Underneath the big black sun

Tell me why you want to be blind
I don't want to be
Normal like you
I know now
Everyday

I get closer
To the place inside
Where i can be complacent

I get closer
To the place inside
Where i can be sedated

I get closer
To the place inside
Where i can be normal too

Where i can be normal like you
Maybe normal like you

I can be normal like you

SANTA MONICA
Sparkle And Fade #4

I am still living with your ghost
Lonely and dreaming of the west coast
I don't want to be your downtime
I don't want to be your stupid game

With my big black boots and an old suitcase
I do believe I'll find myself a new place
I don't want to be the bad guy
I don't want to do your sleepwalk dance anymore
I just want to see some palm trees
Go and try to shake away this disease

We can live beside the ocean
Leave the fire behind
Swim out past the breakers
Watch the world die

I am still dreaming of your face
Hungry and hollow for all the things you took away

I don't want to be your good time
I don't want to be your fall-back crutch anymore

I'll walk right out into a brand new day
Insane and rising in my own weird way
I don't want to be the bad guy

I don't want to do your sleepwalk dance anymore
I just want to feel some sunshine
I just want to find some place to be alone

We can live beside the ocean
Leave the fire behind
Swim out past the breakers
And watch the world die

WONDERFUL
Songs From An American Movie Vol. 1: Learning How To Smile #11

I close my eyes when I get too sad
I think thoughts that I know are bad
Close my eyes and I count to ten
I hope it's over when I open them
I want the things that I had before
Like a Star Wars poster on my bedroom door
I wish I could count to ten
Make everything be wonderful again
I hope my mom and I hope my dad
Will figure out why they get so mad
I hear them scream, I hear them fight
Say bad words that make me wanna cry
Close my eyes when I go to bed
And I dream adventures* that will make me smile
I feel better when I hear them say
Everything will be wonderful someday
Promises mean everything when you're little
And the world's so big
I just don't understand how,
You can smile with all those tears in your eyes
Tell me everything is wonderful now
na, na, na, na, na, na, nahhh (repeated)
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now
I go to school and I run & play
I tell the kids that it's all ok
I like to laugh so my friends won't know
When the bell rings I just don't wanna go home
Go to my room and I close my eyes
I make believe that I have a new life
I don't believe you when you say
Everything will be wonderful someday
Promises mean everything when you're little
And the world is so big
I just don't understand how,
You can smile with all those tears in your eyes
When you tell me everything is wonderful now

na, na, na, na, na, na, nahhh
na, na, na, na, na, na, nahhh
na, na, na, na, na, na, nahhh
na, na, na, na, na, na, nahhh

I don't wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now.
I don't wanna hear you say
That I will understand someday
No, no, no, no
I don't wanna hear you say

No, no, no, no
I don't wanna meet your friends
And I don't wanna start over again
I just wanna my life to be the same, just like it used to be
Some days I hate everything
Some days I hate everything
Ever wanna live with me?
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now

na, na, na, na, na, na, nahhh
na, na, na, na, na, na, nahhh
na, na, na, na, na, na, nahhh
na, na, na, na, na, na, nahhh

Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now
I don't wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now
I don't wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now
Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now