Pairing: Chris Larabee/Vin Tanner
Rating: PG (possibly R for violence)
Warnings: Violence (just a little though, nothing they can't handle...)
Spoilers: None

*****

Vin Tanner stood in the middle of the street watching his tall, dark clad partner engaged in a conversation with the news provider of Four Corners, Mary Travis. Chris had told him last night how much he enjoyed her company, how nice and decent she was, and how beautiful, almost resembling an angel, and so on. He'd sounded almost desperate, and Vin hadn't believed him one bit. Except maybe for the thing about him enjoying her company, but then, they all did. And she was stunningly beautiful, which made it sort of unnecessary to point that out to him, as if he hadn't noticed.

He kept watching the two for a moment, then slowly approached them, stepping up on the porch on which they were standing. He touched the brim of his hat in a silent greeting, then leaned back against the wall, his body language telling everyone that there was no need to take notice of him, as always. He saw Mary glancing at him, uncertainly. He knew he was invading the personal space that her and Chris's conversation should be allowed, and that people already thought his manners needed some improving. If he cared, he would probably be inclined to agree with them.

"Did you want something, Tanner?" Chris finally asked him, after having unsuccessfully tried to catch his eye.

"Me?" Tanner asked, his tone of voice indicating that he was surprised he'd even been spoken to.

Chris sighed. "Yes, Tanner, you."

"Just came here to get away from the sun," Vin said. "Hardly didn't even see you two were here 'til you started talking to me."

"Too bad we didn't just ignore you then," Chris said.

"Yeah, too bad," Vin said. He still didn't look at either Chris or Mary, but he could feel both of them watching him. Chris was a bit upset, he could tell from the tension in the air.

"We're talking here, Vin, so if you ain't got something on your mind-"

"I don't."

"Then go somewhere else."

"I've a right to be here," Vin said.

Mary looked at the two men. She knew something was going on, but had no idea what. Judging from how Larabee's eyes had turned cold since Tanner had joined them, she assumed a fight - or at least an argument - was imminent, and she wanted to be nowhere near when that happened. "Why don't I leave the two of you alone," she said, smiling at them. She really wanted to get away from there. She liked Chris, but that temper of his was something that she could not approve of.

"That shouldn't be necessary, Mrs. Travis," Chris said, glaring at Vin. "Vin was just about to leave anyway, weren't you, Vin?"

"No," Vin said.

Chris took a deep breath, then another. "No really, I think you were."

"No," Vin said, looking up at Chris. The man sure was angry. Vin had him right where he wanted him. Mary was standing there with them, but all of Chris's emotions were directed at him. "I think Mrs. Travis was, though."

Mary looked at Vin, the man's words surprising her. At his best, he could be considered to be sort of well-behaved, and she was certain that his silence often saved him from having some of the people around the town look down on him even more than they already did, but right now he was just plain rude, and she couldn't find an explanation for it. Why was he being rude to her, and why was he so obviously trying to pick a fight with Chris? She hoped there was a reasonable explanation, because she really liked the young man, despite everything. "Yes," she said, "I do have to leave now. I have to go to my office and get some work done."

"We understand, Mrs. Travis," Vin said. "It's all right."

Chris glared at him again, then turned his attention to Mary. "You do a good job with your paper, Mary," he said. "Take care of yourself."

"I will. You too take care," she said, then, glancing quickly at Vin, "both of you." She hurried away, feeling a little confused.

Chris watched her leave them, then slowly turned towards Vin again, who was still leaning against the wall, looking more relaxed than Chris felt he ought to. "I should bruise you real bad, Vin. You know, I should just keep hitting you 'til there ain't no blood left in that worthless body of yours," he said, his anger turning his face red.

"Shut up, Chris," Vin said. "Stop talking, and just do it if you're gonna."

"You got a twisted mind or something?"

"Or something," Vin said.

Chris shook his head. "There's something wrong with you, Vin, I'm telling you."

"Ain't nothing wrong with me," Vin said. "And I see things clearly." He pushed himself away from the wall, closing the distance between he and Chris. "Everything," he added, looking into Chris's eyes, daring him to question him. When Chris didn't say anything, he continued. "You keep running after Mary, making yourself look stupid. She don't want you."

Chris raised his eyebrows. "Oh, really? Did she tell you that?"

"No, but I'll go ask her, if you need it confirmed."

"You're wrong, Tanner. And even if you weren't, it'd be none of your business," Chris said. "What's it to you, anyway?"

"What do you think?" Vin said slowly, his eyes never leaving Chris's.

Chris swallowed hard. "I don't think anything," he said. It came out weaker than it was supposed to.

"You think too much, that's the problem," Vin said.

Chris turned his head away. He was losing control of the situation. "Ain't no such thing," he said.

Vin took a step closer to Larabee, making him look him in the eyes again. "You're gonna give me a chance, cowboy," he said quietly, then he walked away, leaving Chris where he stood.

***

"You ain't been talking much tonight, Chris."

Chris replied without looking up at Buck. "I usually don't, do I?"

"No. But tonight you ain't talking, plus you got a very funny look in your eyes." As Chris himself had said, he didn't always talk much, and because of that Buck had at first not noticed the very peculiar way he'd take hold of his shot glass, lift it up, look at it, and then put it back on the table, looking pensive.

"Watching me your new hobby, Buck?" Chris asked, looking up at his friend.

"Can't say it is, but you're sitting here right in front of me, and I'm just telling you what I see."

Chris sighed. "It's just me, Buck. Nothing out of the ordinary going on."

Buck nodded. "Ain't been nothing much at all going on in this town lately," he said. "You getting a bit bored, maybe?"

"It's been a bit quiet," Chris agreed. "I ain't bored, though. Might as well enjoy it while it lasts." He looked around the saloon. The people there were all behaving themselves. Maybe because he and Buck - and Ezra, gambling as usual - were there, maybe they would have anyway. But it wouldn't last for long. It never did. "What about you, you bored?"

Buck smiled. "Nah, not me. As long as I have them ladies to keep me company, I'm fine."

Chris shook his head slowly. If it could only be that easy for him. "I'm happy for you," he said, knowing the sarcasm in his voice was a bit unjust. Buck couldn't help who he was. "You never wanna settle down with someone?"

"Can't say it's something I have planned. Not yet, anyway." Buck laughed. "There are so many to choose from, Chris. Hell, who would I pick?"

"I can understand that might be a problem," Chris said dryly.

Buck laughed again. "I ain't a family man. Not like you."

Chris's mind darkened. "I used to be a family man," he said. "Ain't no more."

"What if you are?" Buck said. "I've seen you with Mary and Billy." He leaned over the table, speaking quietly. "Hell, Chris, it's just you and me here, pard. You've a little more than friendly interest in Mary, don't you? Come on, you can tell me."

Chris smiled sadly. Not only had he managed to fool himself, he'd managed to fool his oldest friend as well. "She's a lovely woman," he said, wondering just how many times he'd said that. She was lovely, very much so. But he didn't want her. He closed his eyes briefly, then opened them again. Pushing the shot glass still full of whiskey to Buck's side of the table, he stood up. He hadn't intended to leave, but he knew where Buck would take the conversation if he stayed. "You drink that if you want. I'll go check if everything's as calm outside as it is here. If something's up, I'll come back for you, if not, I'll go to my room."

"Tired already?" Buck said, smiling. "Ain't getting old, are you?"

"No," Chris said, trying to smile back. He knew he should have come up with a better retort, but he just didn't have it in him. Not tonight.

***

He'd only been in his room at the boarding house for a few minutes when someone knocked at the door. He reluctantly opened it, letting his visitor inside, then closed the door. "What do you want?"

"Just wanted to see you."

"Why?"

"You know why, Chris, stop giving me that shit."

"Oh, don't worry, Vin, I ain't gonna give you nothing at all." Chris ran his fingers through his hair. Why the hell was Vin doing this? If they could just both let it be. "What do you want from me, Vin?"

"Only what you think you should be giving to Mary," Vin said.

Chris took hold of Vin's coat, furiously pushing him backwards, into the wall. "You leave her out of this," he said.

"I'm glad you're finally seeing there is a 'this'," Vin said, trying to stay calm, and ignore the pain.

Chris dragged Vin away from the wall, forcefully throwing him down on the floor. "Mary's a wonderful woman," he said, trying really hard to remain in control of himself. "She's beautiful, intelligent-"

"Just stop that, all right?" Vin interrupted him before he had to hear another of Larabee's Mary-praising tirades. He rubbed his left shoulder carefully. Damn, it hurt. "If I try to get up, you ain't gonna kick me down again or something, are you?"

"Why don't I just help you up myself," Chris said, leaning down to grab Vin's arms, then threw him against the wall again.

Vin screamed, the pain in his shoulder increasing. "Stop it, Chris," he said, his voice unsteady. He wasn't sure what he'd expected coming here, but this was not part of it, despite Larabee's earlier threats.

"What the hell do you want from me?" Chris yelled, hitting Vin's face with the back of his hand.

"I already told you," Vin said, prepared that Chris might hit him again. But Chris let go of him, and Vin watched him walk to the bed, slowly sitting down on it, looking as if he was the one in pain.

Chris stayed silent for a long moment, waiting to see if Vin would leave. He really should, he thought. He looked up at the other man, seeing him still leaning against the wall. There was some blood around his lips, and Chris suddenly had to look away. "Vin, I..." he began.

"Don't, Chris," Vin said, his voice a bit raw. "You couldn't have stopped yourself if you'd tried. You meant what you did."

Chris looked up at him then. "Why are you still here?" he asked.

Vin stepped away from the wall, and took out a kerchief from his pocket. He carefully wiped away the blood from his lips, then sat down on the bed beside Larabee. "Don't you know, or are you telling yourself you don't know?"

Chris turned his head to look at Vin. When their eyes met, Chris thought it felt as if something inside of him began to turn, and he felt dizzy. He'd experienced something similar before when being around Vin, but the feeling had never been this powerful. He'd never let it be. "Vin, this is..." He cleared his throat. "Don't matter if I want the same. It's wrong."

Vin nodded slowly. "Probably is. Reckon some people think so, anyway." He shrugged. "Don't matter to me, though. I figured maybe it wouldn't matter much to you either."

Chris got up from the bed, and walked around the room. He stopped by the window and looked out into the darkness. He felt calmer now, his heart was beating normally again. "So Mary ain't interested in me, you say?" He tried to laugh, but it came out sounding more like a cough.

"I think she was before, but then she got to know you," Vin said, hoping the truth would hurt.

Chris frowned, but kept looking out the window. "That's an awful nice thing to say, Tanner."

"Thought you already knew," Vin said.

"I did." Chris thought about how he'd done practically everything except asked her to marry him, and she hadn't responded to any of it. She'd probably known long before he did that they weren't right for each other, that they were never meant to be more than friends.

"Her loss," Vin said softly.

Chris turned around, looking at Vin. "You think so?"

Vin nodded. "Yeah."

Chris watched his partner, wondering what, exactly, he was getting himself into. "Speaking of Mary," he said after a while, "you were pretty rude to her today."

"I know," Vin said. "Don't matter much, though. She wouldn't expect any better from me."

"Maybe not," Chris agreed, "but you might wanna be a bit nicer to her. She's an important person in this town, and we have to live here, you know."

"No we don't," Vin said. "You got plans to stay here forever?"

Chris shrugged. "Ain't thought much about it lately. I guess I'm gonna stick around for a while at least."

"Me too, but I ain't planning on settling down here," Vin said.

"I can't really picture you settling down anywhere," Chris said, the thought unexpectedly saddening.

Vin noticed the change in Chris's voice. "Don't be so sure," he said. "I'm just saying it probably won't be here."

"Well, it's up to you, I guess," Chris said.

Vin rubbed his left shoulder, wincing at the pain he still felt there. "I like it here, but I ain't sure I think of it as my home."

"Did I hurt you bad?" Chris asked, noticing Vin's discomfort.

"I'll live," Vin said.

Chris nodded. He felt bad about what he'd done, but Vin had been right when he'd said he'd meant it. There was no point making insincere excuses now, trying to make the incident into something it wasn't. "I ain't so sure I think of this as my home either," he said.

"Then maybe it wouldn't be hard for you to leave," Vin said.

"Maybe not."

Vin looked closely at Chris, his face that too seldom was lit up by a smile, his body that never seemed to fully relax. He wanted to take him somewhere where that could change. "If I ever left, would you come with me?"

Chris took a deep breath, then slowly let it out. He turned away from Vin, once again looking out the window. "Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I'd come with you."

*****

End