The Serious Gamer
By Spike Snell
December 6, 2001
In a small dank room a gamers face is alit by a humming television.
"I've got to land this trick." You say barely audible over the hum of your television.
"I've got to land this trick!" You say once again but more in your head this time.
You are playing your "favorite" game, but it is quickly becoming your enemy. You know you can do this trick, but you have to prove it. You have to prove it to yourself, or you don't know what you would do, but you're sure it is something terrible.
Reaching for the reset button you say it yet again "I have GOT TO LAND THIS TRICK!" You have done it before but why not now? Have you lost it? Have you lost your edge? The one thing that makes you better than everyone else, the one thing that makes your life bearable.
Now your getting back to the same level getting ready to try it again when suddenly you hear a voice, almost familiar, trying to stop you from reaching your all important goal. No! You can't go yet. You haven't landed the trick.
You are now very close to your goal, you can almost envision yourself feeling happy, but you haven't done it yet, you haven't landed the trick.
Seconds pass as hours, and still you haven't done it yet. In your most frantic haste you somehow manage to do it. You have landed the trick!
"I did it, I did it!" you scream within your brain.
"But was it a fluke?" you wonder, "Did I really do it or was it a fluke?" This is the worst feeling yet, worse than not being able to land the trick. You're sure now that it was a fluke and you will never be able to land the trick again, you've lost your edge. How could you let this happen?
"The only way to feel better is to land it again." Another voice says. Not your voice, but nobody else is here. It must be you. "Or else you're crazy." It says. "You don't want to be crazy do you?"
"NO!" you reply.
"Then land the trick again!" "It is the only way you will feel better about yourself."
And so you do, and you start feeling worse and worse.
Lather, rinse, and repeat. Always repeat. These are the thoughts, the only thoughts, of a serious gamer.
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