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Q. Help! I masturbate constantly. Even at work, sometimes three to four times a day. I have a healthy sex life otherwise. Is this normal?
A: At last masturbation has lost the stigma it used to have. These days, instead of warning us that it could cause blindness or insanity, sex therapists encourage women to masturbate — not only does it feel great and relieve tension, it's also a good way to get to know your body and understand what turns you on. But anything in excess can be destructive — whether it's food, exercise, shopping, or, in this case, solo sex — when it starts to interfere with your daily life.
Here are some questions to ask yourself: Do you feel compelled to pleasure yourself? Are you unable to concentrate on work or other activities because you're so busy planning your next solo session? Are you late or absent from appointments and find yourself making excuses to cover up your sexy habit? Perhaps you can manage to masturbate four times a day and not disrupt your normal life. But your admission of masturbating at the office raises red flags. At work, your focus should be on business (unless, of course, you have a vocation like mine). A healthy adult doesn't run off and masturbate every time she is horny. This shows me you can't keep your call-to-climax under control.
Four self-pleasuring sessions a day seems a bit extreme to me, especially in addition to the otherwise healthy sex life you say you have. Why do you think you seek so much sexual satisfaction? Is it because you just learned how to bring yourself to climax and are so thrilled with your newfound talent that you feel like practicing a thousand times? If so, perhaps this is just a phase. Or maybe you're under a lot of stress and using masturbation for tension relief. If so, there are other ways to naturally relax, such as meditation and exercise. Try to cut down on touching yourself for a while by imposing a once-a-day rule. If this is impossible, it may be time to seek the help of a therapist.
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