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Q: I've only had sex with my new guy a few times, and he's commented that I'm quiet in bed. I guess he's right — when I have an orgasm, I don't yell or scream. Should I be making more noise to turn him on? How can I become noisier?
A: Guys live for noises of appreciation. Your oooh's, ahhhh's, and oh-yes's are a big part of his sexual pleasure. Whimpering moans and heated little breaths greatly turn on the opposite sex and inspire peak performances. Being more vocal would benefit you, too, because it positively reinforces your guy's instinct to please you.
A few hints about love noises: Since sounding out doesn't come naturally to you, don't overcompensate now by screeching out your pleasure. There's nothing more transparent than a phony, porno-style soundtrack. Instead, go low-volume with breathy gasps of aaah or mmmm when things feel good — the type you'd make when digging into a slice of chocolate mud pie. And — this is very important — don't fake appreciation when you're not feeling much, because your boyfriend will forever repeat the touch or thrust style that made you moan. We most definitely don't want to confuse him about what you like.
But when your lover is on track, don't be afraid to tell him so. Say, "Oooo, that feels sooo good. Don't stop!" Then mumble, "Don't stop!" a few more times. (Although men hate to ask for directions, trust me, they love to take direction here!) If he's hit a real pleasure point, tell him specifically. Whisper in his ear, "It feels so good when you ____." "You drive me crazy by touching me on my ____." "You're getting me so hot by kissing me there on my _____." (Bear in mind that guys love to hear the names of body parts.) You may feel bashful about being so explicit, but once you see how overjoyed your boyfriend gets when you talk this way, I'm certain you'll be very happy you did.
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