Good morning, good afternoon or good evening to you my friends - whichever of those three applies at the present time. Welcome to the first 2005 edition of The Gospel According to "L". Hopefully 2005 will be either a better year or as good a year as 2004 was for you. The other day I had this great idea: in the future, I may do this as a recorded message, rather than a written one. It would be probably be a 20-minute weekly/periodically recording that you could listen to on the web - sort of like a book on tape, or even one of those early morning 90-second commentaries you hear on AM radio. I just hope some of you from out of town will get used to my New York accent. Anyway, we got a hell of a "show" for you today: we're going to talk a bit about Randy Johnson, I will respond to a Yankee-bashing column in the Sporting News. I will also talk about the name change by a certain Major League team out west, and I'll talk a bit about Carlos Beltran and his situation.
Before I do all this I want to congratulate Wade Boggs on his induction to the Baseball Hall of Fame in the Coop. Hopefully he will go in as a Yankee, but I guess that's up to him now isn't it? Anyway, if you're ready, let's begin.
Let me begin with the trade for Randy Johnson. I told you in the last Gospel that there is always hope, and I even gave you some reasons why. Well my friends, I was right on the money. The Big Unit has arrived and he will be pitching for our beloved Bronx Bombers. All we had to give up was Javy Vazquez (thank God), Brad Halsey (who is more suited for a National League team), Dioner Navarro (the only player I think the organization will truly miss,) and $9 mil. But Navarro will then go to the Dodgers in the Shawn Green trade - and after trading away Paul Lo Duca last season, the Dodgers could use somebody like Dioner.
There were only three obstacles to this trade - get the D-Back's to approve a trade, get approval from the Marxist Commissioner Bud Selig (which he approved two weeks ago), get a contract extension for the Unit (which they last Thursday), and finally all men had to pass physicals (which they did.) Now that all that is complete, soon-to-be former no. 51 (that's Bernie's number) will be the Yankees' ace beginning in April. Our dream has finally come true.
I do want to briefly talk about the little fiasco he had with the CBS 2 people. To think you animals outside of this city do nothing but complain about the New York media. Well the New York media, which only people here in New York can see, and which doesn't control ESPN or FOX, gave you a little bit of ammo. He did have his little run in, which I didn't condone, but he also did apologize for it and offered no excuses for what happened. I only got to hear the last part of the press conference since I was in the subway heading back to Queens. But anyway, thankfully this little incident will all blow over soon, and all everybody will be thinking about is how he's doing on that rubber.
Now that Randy Johnson wears the interlocking-NY on his front, the Bronx Bombers have either equaled or one-upped the Boston Red Sox. Now the Sox did sign Matt Clement, Wade Miller and David Wells - and that's a pretty damn good combo if you ask me. But to have Mussina, Pavano, Johnson and then Brown and Wright in your mix: that's easily another 100 wins and a hell of a combination for October. Imagine having to face Randy Johnson twice in a five-game series against a team that has a good offensive lineup. It would scare the be-Jesus out of me, I don't know about you. This is one hell of a belated Christmas present my friends - and we didn't give up that much. All right: next topic.
Now I want to respond to a column written in the Sporting news by a guy named Stan McNeal. Now the column is titled "Take this to the bank: The Yanks could tank". Very cute, you know it rhymes: bank with tank - I mean you've got to be poetic right? I'd like to rhyme the Red in Red Sox with dead, but I won't do that right now. Anyway, he first gives the scum known as Yankee haters some encouraging words about how things can go wrong; he even goes as far as calling the Bombers the "Bronx Billionaires." That is the greatest oxymoron on God's green earth - there is not even a millionaire, much less a billionaire, that resides in Bronx County. Besides that, are you jealous Stanley? Are you jealous of the fact that George Steinbrenner is a successful businessman who knows how to make and spend money the way your lousy team's owner doesn't? Hey I was told revenue sharing and the anti-capitalist luxury tax were both going to fix that problem. I have four little words for that: I told you so!
Anyway, he gives a list of 17 obstacles that could hinder the Yankees from winning it all in 2005. I'm going to reply to some of these - let's see what you think. The "obstacles" are in bold face while my replies are in regular font.
Pitching without any cartilage in his right knee hinders Randy Johnson more this season than last (when it didn't seem to hinder him at all), especially in the cold of early April and late October, when warming up the old bones is a little tougher than it was back in Arizona.
With that little line in parenthesis, he just shot down his own argument! First off, Randy Johnson at 80 or 90% is still better than most pitchers at 100%! Second, if he passed his physical exam, which means he is probably close to or at 100%! Don't jump to conclusions there tough guy!
Carl Pavano finds that pitching in front of 50,000 New Yorkers -- or a packed house at Fenway -- is a tad more intense than working in front of 30,000 empty seats.
Oh yeah, he sure found it a tad more intense in game four of the 2003 World Series when he pitched a damn gem in front of a full house in Miami! McNeal, if this is the best you can do, I'm feeling a lot better about things. But to you I'll bet Pedro will win 20 games right?
Despite offseason surgery on his left shoulder, Gary Sheffield has trouble hitting like Gary Sheffield.
He didn't have too much trouble last season when he was in a lot of pain, so how can it be logical to think he'd be worse with no shoulder pain? The only thing Gary Sheffield should worry about now is having the entire world now know that he ended up marrying a $2 slut! If I were Sheff, that's all I'd worry about, not the shoulder.
The decline of Bernie Williams, 36 and expected to play center field more often because Kenny Lofton is gone, changes gears: slow to fast.
Wait a minute, wait one minute. If you know George Steinbrenner, you know he and company will look for a centerfielder. Despite all that, Bernie still has some gas left in that tank, so I wouldn't even rule Bernie out yet. Like Michael Kay said - the Yankees would have wanted to have Carlos Beltran for 2006 and beyond, not 2005! We'll talk more about Beltran later on.
Tony Womack, a National League lifer, does not adjust to American League pitchers. His numbers become much more as they were in 2003 (.226, .251 on-base percentage) than 2004 (.307, .349).
That could be the case the first month or two, but if it is, once he gets on base more often, he will do plenty of damage so I wouldn't even worry about that one. And you shot your own credibility with those 2003 and 2004 stats - God McNeal, you're a moron! Who gave you your journalist license - Dan Rather?
Alex Rodriguez, quietly stewing because he could not get Rudy Jaramillo hired as the team's batting coach, goes into a funk. Batting coach Don Mattingly decides to let A-Rod work out his struggles on his own.
Come on, don't insult our intelligence. First off, even before he became a Texas Ranger, A-Rod was already considered the number one shortstop in all of baseball - do you expect us to believe that he'd "stew" about this after the numbers he put up after that slow start?
Joe Girardi isn't quite the bench coach for Joe Torre that Willie Randolph was
I got news for you Mac Daddy, Joe Girardi is a great baseball mind, which was one reason the YES Network hired him as an analyst! Many who have worked with him have even said he'd make an excellent manager, so don't give us this crap! Do some research before making these statements you sack of swill!
Mariano Rivera blows another save at the wrong time. Hey, it has happened -- five times in 37 postseason chances, in fact.
The one he blew in the Division Series didn't hurt much since the Yankees ended up winning in extra innings, and the last save he blew (game 5 of the ALCS) was unfair since that run was a) an inherited runner and was b) a sac-fly. If he had not walked Millar in the ninth inning of game four, the Red Sox and their fans probably continue to suffer and the Yankees go on to destroy the Cardinals in the World Series. How do you know Cat? The Cards didn't bother to show up for the World Series, while the Yankees and Torre have been there before - you do the math!
It is discovered that radio play-by-play man Charley Steiner, who defected to L.A. in the offseason, actually was a good-luck teddy bear.
This beast wasted precious energy writing that? TSN should fire you for being incompetent you slimeball! It's no wonder Yankee haters have no credibility! By the way, I will talk about Steiner in a future Gospel.
Even after feasting on the Devil Rays, Orioles and Blue Jays on the way to winning 105 regular-season games, the Yankees realize (gulp!) they must win in late October to make their boss happy. Remember, they didn't do that last season. Or the year before. Or in the two years before that.
But they did do it the four of the five seasons before that and they can do it again whether you like it or not! In fact, they are the only team in the past ten years to win at least three World Series titles! The Braves only won one after all those division titles, the Indians couldn't quite reach the big prize, the Mariners never even got to the Series, the Mets only got to the World Series because somebody else knocked off the Braves, and the Red Sox capitalized on stupidity to make it to the Series. Remember Sox fans, if Mariano doesn't walk Millar, Dave Roberts probably doesn't pinch run, which means that run might not have scored and your so-called curse lives on.
Well friends, there you have it, I've done my best to discredit at least ten of seventeen obstacles. I'll give this guy credit, he may be right about a few of them - you can read them all here, but I'd love to see his arguments get shot down big time. This is what amazes me, everybody complains about the New York media, which only people in New York can see, but the National Media, which everybody gets to see, doesn't get one word of criticism! I will save this list if the Yankees do win the World Series, and I will e-mail Stanley Mac at smcneal@sportingnews.com to see how he likes them big apples. Let's move on to the next topic.
Now I want to talk about this idiotic name change done by the Anaheim Angels and their owner Arturo Moreno. I'm sure you heard about this - the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. How in the hell can you have two cities on each end of a name? Either call yourselves the Los Angeles Angels (which is how the franchise began in 1961) or the Anaheim Angels, but not this stupid nonsense.
Can you imagine the Yankees calling themselves the New York Yankees of the Bronx or the New York Mets of Flushing? How about the Florida Marlins of Miami, the Colorado Rockies of Denver, the Washington Nationals of D.C., or even the Texas Rangers of Arlington? This is absolutely absurd! What initials am I supposed to give them? LAA? Los Angeles Angels doesn't really make sense anymore since the last franchise to use the name Los Angeles while playing in Anaheim (the Rams) moved to St. Louis. The Mighty Ducks of Anaheim maybe should call themselves the Los Angeles Mighty Ducks of Anaheim. A six-named team, lovely huh? I think the Los Angeles Kings would haul them into court and justifiably so. California Angels is fine with me as far as I am concerned, so is Anaheim Angels. Some days I wish the Los Angeles Clippers would move to the Arrowhead Pond permanently and call themselves the Anaheim Clippers (or the Los Angeles Clippers of Anaheim) - this way they finally have their own identity and create their own fan base. But it's not as if they'd listen to me, nor would the people in Orange and Los Angeles counties.
Back to this idiotic name with two cities. Tell me Angels fans, would you be proud of that? I can understand that is your team and they represent your hometown, but you can't tell me you're proud of a name like that. Well, all I can do is sound off about it - I can't change the world. Let's move on to the final topic.
I'm going to wrap it up with the Carlos Beltran deal. Beltran just signed a seven-year deal worth $119 million with the Mets. The Astros had until midnight last Saturday to re-sign him, but they couldn't and didn't - so don't expect to see Roger Clemens throwing a single pitch in 2005. The Yankees dropped out of the sweepstakes completely - and understandably so. Now Steinbrenner and company can go after a good centerfielder at a cheaper price. But like I said before: they don't need Beltran in 2005!
If there was any season Carlos Beltran was needed: it would be in 2006, after Bernie's contract expires. That will not happen now, but you won't see me shedding tears over it. Beltran is a very good player, although his lifetime batting average is below .300, unlike some others the Yankees signed or traded for before (A-Rod, Giambi.) I would have loved to have had him, but the price was a bit too high, and he isn't exactly Ken Griffey Jr. He did drive in at least 100 runs in every full season he has played, and he did not hit 30 homers until last season. I'm not saying he's all hype, believe me, I'd have loved to have had him as a Yankee. But it's not as if this makes the Yankees a weaker team, so don't get too excited Yankee haters, and put down the guns or nooses my fellow Yankee fans.
The only time I'd be worried is if Bernie got himself injured - other than that; there's not much to worry about. Remember he has the post-season records for homeruns and RBI's, he hit .306 in the ALCS, and he has four little things Beltran may never even get one of: World Series rings. The only problem with Bernabe is his age: he turns 37 in September. Now I don't know who will be a free agent in 2006, but knowing George Steinbrenner, he will get his man. Like I said, so far 2005 is ok for centerfield, but beyond that it's the big cliché known as the question mark. Beltran will probably make the Mets a contender for the Wild Card (you're dreaming if you think you're going to overtake a Braves rotation with Tim Hudson and John Smoltz,) but you won't have to worry about seeing him in a World Series, if it gets that far.
Like I said, I would have loved to have had him playing for the Yankees, and I would not have cared what these hypocrites have said about a $300 million payroll! This is America, if you don't like it go to Cuba or some other nation that agrees with your economic beliefs! Stop being so damn jealous of others who have more money! Once again, I reiterate Bernie is still good for one more year, so Beltran's free agency period came a little too early for us. Met fans, you got yourselves a good centerfielder, but I don't have to tell you that: you guys saw him with the Astros last season. Things in my opinion are still looking up, and hopefully, 2005 will be the year for a return to glory. I'll see you next time friends - take care.