September 11, 2001

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A day no one will ever forget, forever etched in the minds of our nation. A horrific display of terrorism. Who ever is responsible is a monster.  It makes my heart ache, thinking of all those people who died, or who are dieing. Little did they know that they'd never kiss their children, spouse or significant other, good bye again. They had no idea this morning was the last they'd ever wake to. It's so heartwrenching to see the faces and hear of the totals mounting into the thousands.  I know that I could never fathom what the families are dealing with. I pray I never have to feel their kind of pain. My heart goes out to them, my prayers are with them. I've been praying all day for them, may their souls rest in peace, I pray they did not suffer more than the fear they must have felt in the airplanes. You saw news footage of the 2nd World Trade Center tower collapsing, and people jumping out the windows in utter panic.  I feel horrible that there isn't anything I can do from clear over here. But, to be able to pray for them and their familes is something I don't take lightly. I hope that my prayers are only a few of the millions being said world wide. Those horrible people, that shouldn't be given a second thought, are in the minds of everyone. Who did it? Who is the mastermind? President Bush is speaking the words, every American is saying in their minds. They must be hunted down and punished. And not only them, but the people who are aiding the monsters, they're as big of monsters as the actual terrorists who planned this whole thing. Who in their right minds would help hide people who helped kill thousands of people? How can anyone say "it's a good thing what they did, let's help them hide cuz we believe in them" What they did is something that is unfathomable, inexplicable, unforgivable. They will each get theirs when they meet their maker. Nothing we could do to them would even come close to what God will do. I am however, impressed with the United states as a whole. I think we've pulled together, whether it be in prayer, or hands on help, to help those injured or threatened, or killed. Some even gave their own lives, to save others. What they did was heroic, and something that needs to be mentioned. Most, are there because it's what they "signed up" to do, but they wouldn't have "signed up" to be a firefighter, military, police officer etc, if they didn't have hearts the size of Texas. I applaud them all, and I also applaud those who were just civilians, helping. Acts of heroism and pulling together, is a sure slap in the face to those monsters. I bet they thought we'd crumble with fear. NO no! We showed them we're strong, and we're even stronger when we come together as one! And we did that. We faced it and fought back, by not cringing and weeping, but by helping those in need, and keeping our faith strong and unbreakable. YAY! America. Warren and I fibbed to Austin this morning, after he overheard us talking about this. We changed the subject on him saying everything was fine. Maybe that was wrong. But at the time it seemed what was best. He's such a worrier, and I know he would have worried all day at school about it. Afraid, not understanding, and not being able to ask questions. I had hoped he would have asked questions when he came home, thinking maybe he had heard kids talking at school or something. But not a word. I don't want to bring it up to him, but if he asks, I'll sit down with him and tell him the best I can, what happened, and assure him he is safe, his whole family is safe and he doesn't have to worry. It's going to be tough, looking into those brown eyes, seeing the worry and fear and trying to be strong for him. It's going to be in the history books one day I imagine, and he'll have it in his far back memory, possibly. I'm going to keep tomorrow's newspaper. I dont imagine today's had anything about this in it, as it only happened this morning. But tomorrow morning I'll stop by 7-11 and get a paper and save it.  This isn't something I feel is just going to go away, and maybe when the boys are older, they'll pull it out of Grandmama's hope chest and read it, and learn about today. I feel for them, all my boys, having to grow up in a world full of people like those responsible for today. I fear for their futures, and I hate having to do that. I just want them to grow up to be happy, healthy, loving, responsible,caring, men. And when they're 35 and they start to date, they'll be well rounded. What? you think 35 is too early to date?  *sigh* Well Austin did a funny today. He rolled up his sleeves, all the way up onto his shoulders (he had a short sleeve shirt on to begin with), a hat too small that said "I heart Grandpa" that we bought him when he was a baby, and he walked around asking if he was a cool dude. Yeah Austin, you're a stud, a real cool dude alright.  It took everything in me not to bust out laughing. bahahahahahahahahahaha God love him. "Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or lose." - Lyndon B. Johnson

The NYC skyline will never be the same