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 NIGHTMARE #1 

 After a long night of making love, the young guy rolled over, 

 pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter. 

 Unable to find it, he asked the girl if she had one at hand. "There 

 might be some matches in the top drawer," she replied. He opened 

 the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting 

 neatly on top of a framed picture of another man. naturally, the 

 guy began to worry. "Is this your husband?" he inquired nervously. 

 "No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him. "Your boyfriend 

 then?" he asked. "No, not at all," she said, nibbling away at his 

 ear. "Well, who is he then?" demanded the bewildered guy. Calmly, 

 the girl replied, "That's me before the operation." 



   NIGHTMARE #2 

 The spark had been lost in this guy's marriage, so he was trying to 

 think of a way to rekindle it. One night he came from work, and 

 found his wife asleep in bed. He thought to himself, "what should I 

 do?" "Oh-I know." He proceeded to get under the covers and go down 

 on his wife. Soon she began to gently squirm and moan in pleasure. 

 After a few minutes, her body spasmed with ecstasy as she climaxed. 

 Afterwards, the man went straight to the bathroom to brush his 

 teeth. When he got there, the light was on and he saw his wife 

 there shaving her legs. He exclaimed, "What are you doing in 

 here?!?" She said, "Shhhh!," pointing at the bed, "You'll wake your 

 mother" 

 

   NIGHTMARE #3 

 One night a guy takes his girlfriend home. As they are about to 

 kiss each other goodnight at the front door, the guy starts feeling 

 a little horny. With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand 

 against the wall and smiling, he says to her, "Honey, would you 

 give me a blow job?" Horrified, she replies, "Are you mad? My 

 parents will see us!" "Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this 

 hour?" He asks grinning at her. "No, please. Can you imagine if we 

 get caught?" "Oh come on! There's nobody around, they're all 

 sleeping!" "No way. It's just too risky!" "Oh please, please, I 

 love you so much?!?" "No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just 

 can't!" "Oh yes you can. Please?" Out of the blue, the light on the 

 stairs goes on, and the girl's sister shows up in her pajamas, hair 

 disheveled, and in a sleepy voice she says, "Dad says to go ahead 
 
 and give him a blow job, or I can do it. Or if need be, mom says 

 she can come down herself and do it But for God's sake tell him to 

 take his hand off the intercom!"