* southern^shell is now known as shelly^Forum^leader
 * Suhailah claps fer shelly
* ChanServ sets mode: +v LordArcangel
 * hispup_ smiles and claps too
 *shelly^Forum^leader cracks her nuckles lol
  hello LordArcangel
  let me grab a soda 
  hi lil_lynx
  lol
  do we have profiles in here too, or just in the other one?
  your profiles from the other.. work here sis
  ok, thanks hispup_
  no worries :)
  so does that mean i get my plussie in here too?! 
 * say_lulu loves her plussie
  shelly, heya. Sorry I didn't say much earlier.
  lol
  don't think so lulu :)
  you will have to ask shelly that one
  oh ok, i'll just have to look at it in the other room, lol
* @shelly^Forum^leader enters shaking and dancing around
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> alright who is ready to find out if shelly is normal 
 * @Suhailah pings shell on da bum with an elastic band, then whistles innocently
 <@lil_lynx> i know i'm not normal
 <+LordArcangel> is far from normal
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> *s* ooooooooo waiiiiiiit this isn't about shelly's sanity she isn't normal ya all know that 
* say_lulu is glad she isn't normal
* @shelly^Forum^leader wiggles her butt
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ping me Suhailah!
* Tarlsson shakes my head
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> what can i say I know what i like and so does Suhailah
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> *giggles* 
* say_lulu raises her hand
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> yepper say_lulu 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> and hugssssssss
  hehe
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Welcom to #The_Scene_Connection and #The_D/s_Parlors weekly Discussion/Forum. 
 * @shelly^Forum^leader clears her throat and tosses a grape at lynxie
 * @lil_lynx opens her mouth wide and catches it
 <+Tarlsson> guess she found that grape I threw earlier...hehe
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~First would like to invite you to tune into #RisqueRadio click on this link to connect ~ http://sc3.audiorealm.com:12736/listen.pls ; sit back relax enjoy the discussion and some great music. 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> heheheehe yes I did Tarlson ! 
 * @lil_lynx grabs a waste can and spits the grape out
 <@lil_lynx> ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
 <+Tarlsson> smarty-britches
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> lolol 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Upcoming events this week: Thursday will be our nightly poetry Evening come in and share your writings and/or enjoy others. Friday sets of our first attempt at an Auction. For more information do !Auction. We will have various Tops and bottoms on the block for sale.  Then Saturday evening once everyone piles in we will start of the erotic version of Truth and Dare. 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~General Guidelines for the Discussion is:
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~State your view with out insulting, flaming, calling of names.  Views are welcome and need not be the same but must be presented in a manner that is courteous to all. 
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~At times you may be asked to hold with a thought that is because it will be addressed shortly or is best left for the end of the presentation in the full discussion area. 
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~If the room is placed in monitor state please take no offense this is so the presenter can either have control back or address the question at hand.  
<+Tarlsson> welcome, Lord_Kainne
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Most important enjoy, relax and after come over to #The_Scene_Connection and get hooked up. 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Tonight’s Topic is based on a question many of us have faced at one point or another.  Am I normal for wanting to do this? 
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~The outline of the presentation/discussion will be:
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Definitions
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Intro and Open Floor for 15 minutes starting at top of the list and going around to those who would like to share what they feel/felt when first discovering their desires with in the lifestyle. 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Dominant - submissive relationships are everywhere
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~So what about the kinks
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Conclusion
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Open Forum
 * @shelly^Forum^leader shakes her tush to make sure now that all that is said all are awake *s*
 <+Tarlsson> woohoo
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> Definitions: 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~D/s, which by the way stands for Dominance/submission 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~B&D stands for Bondage and Discipline while S&M stands for Sadism and Masochism.
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Vanilla is a term used by individuals in the BDSM Lifestyle it means sex without control, submission, SM or a fetish role.  
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Normal is not deviating from a norm, rule, or principle; conforming to a particular type, standard, or regular pattern; something that occurs naturally
 wb Lord Kainne
  hello again
 <@lil_lynx> wb again Lord_Kainne
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> Would anyone like to add, or does everyone pretty much agree with the general definitions?
 <+Tarlsson> seem pretty clear to me
 <@Suhailah> agreed :)
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> welcum Lord_Kainne Sir *s* and offers him a seat 
 * Lord_Kainne smiles
 * Lord_Kainne as i sit down
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> Intro and Open Floor for 15 minutes:
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Rather are likes are normal or not is a question we all face when we realize that certain things turn us on or that we are a certain personality.  For me this came in a couple of stages.  
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~First was the life that my ex and I lived - very kinky and I loved it. One of my biggest fears of leaving him was that I would never again experience the lifestyle I had become accustom to both in a submissive role and sexually --- the kinks were great.
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~It wasn’t till a couple years later that I actually discovers submission and everything in my life made so much more sense.  I no longer felt like a freak but understood parts of my life.  
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~This understanding also helped me from going from abusive relationship to abusive relationship.  
 * Suhailah is now known as Suh^bed
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Now the only question was how to find others like me.
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~I would like to take some time and go around the room tell about your experience/feelings as you came into the lifestyle.  
* hispup_ smiles softly as she listens to shelly.. blows Suhailah a kiss.. wishing her sweet dreams and well wishes.. :)
<@shelly^Forum^leader> lil_lynx hun would you like to share with us some of what you felt when you first started getting interested in the lifestyle 
 -hispup_- just rushing to get a coffee.. should be back when you get to me
 <@lil_lynx> at first i really thought i was crazy, i had been through an 8 yr abusive marriage, but then when i found the lifestyle that understood how i feel inside it was actually cool
 <@lil_lynx> although i have to admit, this is an area i'm still working on, i feel strange that i hated my ex beating me, but now i love being flogged and spanked
<@shelly^Forum^leader> same for me - it really helped me to understand me 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> welcome Deslock 
  Hey all
<@lil_lynx> since i've learned there are a group who feel like i do, it has been a huge help, i've learned a lot about myself
  Are we still on the listed topic? or are folks just chatting?
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> yes we are ... lynx would you like to catch him up please *s*
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> currently we are telling about how we felt when we first came into the life style and/or now 
  no worries, I wasn't so much focused on that topic :) just looking to chat :)
 <@lil_lynx> we were discussing whether we feel normal to enjoy the things we do
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> Tarlsson --- what about your self (were going to come back to LordArcangel) 
 -hispup_- i am back sis :)
 <+Tarlsson> Early in my marriage life, my wife and experimented with D/s roles, although we didn't realize that was what we were doing at the time. After the kids were grown and gone, we explored more in earnest. I still have a lot to learn about where I am and where I want to go, but I get a certain sense of exhilaration at exploring something new. Getting involved in a community like this helped me to understand that this process was n
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> hmmm think you cut off Sir 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> process was n
<@shelly^Forum^leader> Did you feel and guilt or shame about the interest you had Tarlsson Sir ..
<+Tarlsson> natural
<+Tarlsson> sorry..I could see it on my screen...hehe
<+Tarlsson> No, no guilt or shame really.
 my one blurb on topic will be http://www.domsub.info/unhealthy.html  I think it focuses not too fair from this topic :)
<+Tarlsson> But I didn't feel it was something I could share before I encountered others living the lifestyle
<+Tarlsson> now it's easier to open up to others and look inside and try and figure out what's going on inside
<@shelly^Forum^leader> Deslock they have a even better one that is on it directly 
<@shelly^Forum^leader> LordArcangel what abuot your feelings Sir 
<+LordArcangel> what I felt when I entered the lifestyle was very loved and accepted by A/all, I felt a sense of family and understanding 
  no doubt :) evening all :)
<@shelly^Forum^leader> Vicctor what about yourself when you came to the lifestyle
<+Vicctor> When I first came into the lifestyle... I was a sub. It felt natural. Things happened though and that realtionship ended.
 <+Vicctor> After that I took a break because of some bad stuff, but when I came back I discovered I liked being a Dom and had Dom tendacies.
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> hispup_ then lysette_ *s* 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> hi Michael``
  hiyas 
  hi Michael`` :)
  i'm up shelly ?
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> yes sis hispup_
  well.. i am online only.. and very new compared to most of you.. only discovered chatrooms in Feb 2004 and bdsm in May the same year :) .. i have used here as a way to explore .. i used to have dreams about D/s related sexual experiences.. thought i was just sick.. lol
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> that happens with alot of us 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> lysette_, what about yourself 
  well I think I must have been lucky, my Mistress found me..and I explored some stuff with her
  what we have, works for us, and I really care what other people view it like
  I dont really care even
 if people dont like, they dont have to be around me
<@shelly^Forum^leader> very good veiw 
<@lil_lynx> way to be lysette_
<@shelly^Forum^leader> Michael`` what about you and/or passion 
 I tried pleasing people before and got kicked in the teeth.. so now I please myself and my Mistress
 well my view is that a lifestyle is what you live it, i didn't "find" the lifestyle, i just found words to possibly describe some of the dynamics of our relationship, since it is just one part of our lives
<@shelly^Forum^leader> I will agree there it sorta found me one day ..... lulu hon what about yourself
<@shelly^Forum^leader> LLOL
<@shelly^Forum^leader> hugs say_lulu -- what about you lulu 
* +Tarlsson chuckles
 i had it all typed out and it got lost...one sec, lol
 I was always trying to please my boyfriends, but they only took advantage of that and i always got hurt
 i told a friend about all of my preferences and he gave me some links to bdsm sites...
 i learned about everything and it felt like a long lost world had come into view
<@shelly^Forum^leader> exactly lulu -- understanding your sub side realy helps 
 Then, adding my fantasies of being taken advantage of and the like and we have a match made in heaven. I soon became involved in my local groups and have been very active for the past two and a half years.
<@shelly^Forum^leader> I would like to talk a little about the Dominant - submissive relationships are everywhere
* say_lulu8 is now known as say_lulu
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~For many people, the thought of D/s or BD/SM immediately brings very kinky and erotic images to the imagination. Yes, it can be very kinky. But that is not what the lifestyle is truly all about.
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Most people live in D/s relationships and never know it.
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~We all live in a D/s relationship every day of our lives. Parents and children, bosses and employees, president of a local club and the members, our relationship with our significant other are all examples of dominance and submission. I am a Dommie mommy, but very submissive in my relationship, Dommie at work. 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~There are many people who enjoy living in the D/s lifestyle relationship even that do not like B&D or S&M play. 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~The difference between individuals in a D/s relationship and the so called vanilla individuals is the folks in D/s have come to accept and cherish their roles as a dominant or submissive personality. 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> So are you normal?  I would have to say very normal. 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> Does anyone have anything to add to the D/s side before we go onto the kinks 
 <+Tarlsson> We all take on different roles based upon the relationships we are involved in
 <+Tarlsson> it's necessary to take a lesser role in some areas and a stronger role in others
<@shelly^Forum^leader> exactly --- but there is always one Dominant and the other a submissive role rather it be your friends, family, coworker, lover or stanger on street 
<@lil_lynx> Its up to each P/person in a D/s relationship to find what roles work for them
<+Tarlsson> it would seem to me that what we are able to do is define (express?) this in our sexual relationships
 yes.. and all couples are different... the only rule that should apply in a D/s relationship.. is the rule that they trust and explore and enjoy :)) .. 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> so Dom-sub thing it really is part of our everyday life so why isn't it normal --- my thoughts are it is very normal
 <@lil_lynx> the only rule that should apply is that it be safe, sane and consentual between the Dom and the sub
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> always 
 <+Vicctor> Normality is in the eye of the beholder.
 <+Tarlsson> There are people that aren't willing to accept their "kinks"
  there is no such thing as normal.. LOL... only average
  who wants to be average ?
 * hispup_ grins
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> Ok now for The Kinks - we all have them 
 * @lil_lynx giggles.. oh yeah!
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~D/s (Dominance/submission.) It is a role that one acts out or is. The kinks come in  with B&D (Bondage and Discipline), the various fetishes (Spanking, feet, cbt, wax play, knife play)  and S&M (Sadism and Masochism)
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~This is one of the areas where most start to feel they are not normal.  One will tend to see it as something they shouldn’t feel.  
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> most of us can accept and understand our submission or Dominance but to admit we like a plug in our ass
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> well it makes us a bit edgy thinking we get pleasure out of a spanking 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Let me ask this tho ~ how many really talk about their sex life openly?  If you take it back 100 years how often was sex talked about?  I ask this because how can one decide it is odd to enjoy something that is bringing them pleasure when no one really knows what goes on behind closed doors.
 <+Tarlsson> Talk about it openly...as in face to face with our friends?
 <+Vicctor> 've done it before.
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> friends, at church, with parents 
 <+Tarlsson> exactly
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> I really don't say hey mom i boinked tom today 20 times 
 <+Vicctor> Friends, a few minor ones with Family.
  i talk to my best friend about it in detail.. and two other friends.. just in passing.. 
 <+Vicctor> They support me and want me to be happy.
 <@lil_lynx> although i did accidently email my mom a pic of me wrapped in saran wrap, i don't talk about my sex life with her as a rule
  lol lynxie
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> but it is limited -- and that is even for people with out kinks 
 <+Vicctor> I'm no religious so I dun have to talk at church.
 <+Tarlsson> I wouldn't have wanted to explain that one.
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> sex is a private thing 
 <@lil_lynx> trust me, i didn't want to explain that one either
 <+Tarlsson> lol
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~The best thing that I can state is You are normal for yourself. Meaning, if you are doing things that bring sensations to you that are enjoyable, if you are mentally stimulated by your play, if you are in complete agreement with every part of every scene, then you are doing what is normal for yourself. So why worry about what the Jones like. like lysette_ said i believe it was 
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~If the Jone’s were to tell you they thought you were abnormal if you didn’t jump into the Grand Canyon would you do it?  Noooooppppeeee.  So why let them control other parts of your life and tell you what is right for you. 
 <+Tarlsson> but life is about control....who has it and who wants it
<+Tarlsson> and who wants to give it up
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> yes --- well even a sub can hate things out of control 
<@shelly^Forum^leader> Conclusion
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Everyone thinks I'm sick cause I love to watch someone's butt get beaten with a whip.
 <@shelly^Forum^leader> ~I must be a freak for liking spankings; I am weak for giving into the dark side of myself. I am nothing more then a control freak. 
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~These are all things and more that I have heard and more.  Let me leave you with a thought before we open the floor fully. 
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~ Abnormality only rears its head when you force yourself, or are forced, to engage in activities you do not enjoy or that do not add to your growth. Abnormality destroys; normality nurtures. If you feel nurtured, you are normal. D/s is a very personal thing. 
* say_lulu whispers, "bye everyone," and walks out the door
<@shelly^Forum^leader> hugs lulu
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~Be careful not to get caught in the net of comparing yourself to others and thinking that only their play is a representation of 'normal'. Remember, 'to each his own' very much applies here.
<+Tarlsson> nite lulu
 night lulu.. hope you feel better soon :)
<@shelly^Forum^leader> ~When you are trying to figure out what normal is ask yourself is it normal to want to bunji jump of a bridge, is it normal to want to chase storms, is it normal to want to spend 10 - 12 hours a day or more in a office when you have a family?  To some yes this is normal ~ to others it is not.  So the only person to define normal for you is you ~ do what you enjoy. 
<@lil_lynx> night lulu... hope you feel better soon honey
@shelly^Forum^leader> ~I would like to open the floor up to some of what your feelings are, experiences and how you have came to accepting the lifestyle is right for you. 
* shelly^Forum^leader is now known as southern^shell
<@southern^shell> lynx you brought up something 
<@lil_lynx> yes ?
<@southern^shell> I went from abuse to abuse, I loved the control but hated the abuse side of it 
<@lil_lynx> exactly
  <@southern^shell> the first time i read a book i called my friend up and she knows i am nuts so i can tell her anything 
 <`rose> lol
 <@southern^shell> I was omg i understand more about me 
 <@southern^shell> and was telling her all about it 
 <@southern^shell> her husband and I share alot of books back and forth on the pshcology of it all ... I am sill learning and always will be but where i was 10 years ago and where i am today I am so much stronger with the knowledge of the lifestyle 
<@lil_lynx> i did the same things... and a friend handed me a book to read.. Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns
 * +Tarlsson nods
 <@southern^shell> oh you will love how i ran into it 
 <@southern^shell> lol
 <+Tarlsson> this should be good
 <@lil_lynx> it was the best book i've ever read, i literally sat and cried after i read it, because i realized there are others out there who feel as i do
 <@southern^shell> we had a few hit and runs in my Cu-see-me channel and saw they were in one of "those sex channels" 
 <@southern^shell> so we followed them and chased em down 
 <@southern^shell> nooooooooo clue what we were in either and omg were we sooooo brat 
 <@southern^shell> running between the Doms legs  and kicking them 
 <@southern^shell> well something pulled me back and i fell in love with it all 
 <@southern^shell> *giggles* and tickles you all 
 * +Tarlsson chuckles
 * hispup_ chuckles to shelly
 <@southern^shell> ok soooooooo who else has something to say 
<@southern^shell> and if not then lets go have sex! in TSC! 
 <+Tarlsson> lol
 * @lil_lynx flies back to TSC
 * hispup_ giggles and heads back exclusively to TSC :))
  i wanna watch :)) .. lol.. to tired to do 
<+Tarlsson> Am I old enough for this? hehe
* @southern^shell pulls Tarlsson to TSC
<+Tarlsson> ut oh.
<+Vicctor> nice discussion shelly.
<@southern^shell> thank you 
* @lil_lynx helps southern^shell pull Tarlsson back to TSC
<+Tarlsson> yes, tyvm
<+Tarlsson> woohoo....hehe
<+Vicctor> sorry I wasn't very active in it ^.^

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