Tube Tunes is a frequently-updated look at music offerings on television, including viewing suggestions, reviews and articles.


Sticks & Stones magazine

Sticks & Stones/ Tube Tunes e-mail list

Contact

Special Report: The 16th Annual Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony and Concert
Airing on VH1, check listings for times and dates

Is it praise to say the Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be? Hope so, because that’s as close as it’s going to get.

The only things that differentiated this from an annual Amway sales meeting were the few inspired musical performances and a few decent one liners from the likes of Keith Richards, Kid Rock and Moby. And who knows: Maybe Amway is a lot cooler than we thought.

The ceremony, cut to 2 1/2 hours for broadcast Wednesday night (and many days and nights thereafter) on VH1, was the same as it ever was. Induction speeches alternated with performances, allowing artists to express thanks for their election to the hall, then back it up with a showing of their stuff.

The show got off to a rocking start with the induction of Queen. Brian May, Roger Taylor, and pinch-hit bass player ran through “We Will Rock You” as a trio before Dave Grohl and Taylor Hawkins of Foo Fighters gave the band’s induction speech. Grohl, a gum-cracking, T-shirt-wearing goofball, kept things light, while the presence of Freddie Mercury’s mother to accept his award, lent the right sense of reverence. Grohl and Hawkins then joined the trio for a rocking run through “Tie Your Mother Down,” a performance that makes you wish someone would give Brian May a job.

Moby, inducting Steely Dan, was next. He joked that he wondered if he was being set up, because Steely Dan seems to like no one. The two grizzled misanthropes in the band did nothing to dispel that thought. Donald Fagen, looking like he’d just eaten a lemon, and Walter Becker, who looks like a high school guidance counselor (“Freaks and Geeks,” anyone?) skipped the speech and threw the floor open to questions. Not satisfied with the one query, Becker asked who the original drummer was in the Mothers of Invention. It’s Carl Black, for those playing at home. The duo, joined by Paul Shaffer and the Late Show Band and May, played “Do It Again.”

One of the funniest segments of the night came when Keith Richards inducted sidemen James Burton and Johnnie Johnson. Richards, who seems to get stranger with each passing year, was wearing a number of things in his hair that resembled fishing lures, but he was charming through the haze. He said sidemen should be called “backmen,” because “You’re always watching this bum with a hair-do.” As he called the two veteran musicians out to get their awards he quipped “Don’t worry, it doesn’t hurt… much.” Reports after Monday’s ceremony said Richards chided Chuck Berry for not coming to support long-time sideman Johnson, but that was trimmed from the broadcast.

In what had to be a low moment, Ricky Martin performed Richie Valens’ trio of hits before inducting the groundbreaking Latino rocker. Is this what Valens’ fought for? Martin’s soulless, pedestrian performance was a travesty. Where was Los Lobos?

N’Sync, in what is hopefully the only way it ever reaches the podium of the hall of fame induction ceremony, was on hand to induct Michael Jackson. You knew this would be weird, but it was also plenty creepy. Jackson, who broke his foot recently, hobbled up the stairs to the stage, leaning on a cane, and you couldn’t help but get a strong “Island of Dr. Moreau” vibe off the guy. Sure, he should have been inducted at the first possible moment for his musical achievements, but he detracted mightily from the night. He didn’t perform, and he looked absolutely freakish. He seems to be getting a bit chubby, but his facial plastic surgery disasters have rendered his face an odd, pinched mask covering the extra pounds.

The best sign that rock ‘n’ roll ain’t dead yet came when Kid Rock inducted Aerosmith. It took that to make me realize that Kid is as good a descendant of that band as any, his raunch always undercut by humor. He pulled out a microphone with scarves on it to induct the band, and then proclaimed them “the American greatest rock ‘n’ roll band.” He even read a little poem for the ’smith. The band was funny, bassist Tom Hamilton telling his mom that “my promise still holds. When I finally get this out of my system, I’ll go to college.” Tyler, hefting one of the statues, said “I wonder if this will put an end to ‘Hey, aren’t you Mick Jagger?’” The then ripped into “Sweet Emotion” with Kid Rock doing a some “singing” and turntable scratching. It was best testament to the enduring power of rock.

The rest of the broadcast, save for Paul Simon, was filled in by the veteran performers. Solomon Burke, once known as the king of rock, looked like James Earl Jones in Eddie Murphy’s “Coming to America,” decked out in some royal robes and headgear. He gave a shout out to his 21 kids, 58 grandchildren and seven great-grandchildren: “Let’s get it on!” Franki Valli inducted the Flamingoes, who like Burke and Johnnie Johnson, gave the most heartfelt, impassioned speeches. Bono inducted former label honcho Chris Blackwell, who ran Island Records. He called record executives “freaks,” a compliment in his eyes, as it took a freak to corral the music and get it to the people. An odd group composed of Bono, Mary J. Blige and Melissa Etheridge (is she in the HOF house band?) did a few Bob Marley tunes in Blackwell’s honor.

Paul Simon had the best line of the night. He’s already a member of the hall for his work with Art Garfunkel, and he took the opportunity to lament his fractured friendship with his partner, saying he hoped the two could reconcile. After some enthusiastic applause from the crowd he said “no rush.” He also thanked legendary disc jockey and payola player Alan Freed, who for “a reasonable sum of money and the publishing on the B-side, would play our songs until there were a hit.” During his performance, Simon was joined by Rolling Stone editor Jann Wenner. If you needed any sign beyond his part in the Travolta movie “Perfect” to know that Wenner was now one of them, not one of us, there you have it.

All in all it was a night full of the standard fare, a long, mildly entertaining night cut by a few genuinely thrilling moments. What a perfect warm up for the Oscars.

posted by John Kenyon at 7:46 AM