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Phoebe: Hey, I forgot your question.
Piper: I asked if Prue would have sex with someone other than herself this year.
Phoebe: That's disgusting. Please say yes.
Piper: It doesn't matter. Because nothing happened, right Phoebe, when you did that incantation.
Phoebe: Well my head spun around and I vomited split-pea soup. How should I know.
Prue: I'm calling the cops.
Piper: And tell them what ? That we're witches ? That some freak with powers beyond comprehension is trying to kill us ?
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Prue: No. No, no. Not at all. It was great. You know, dinner, movie, sex.
Piper: Excuse me ? On your first date ? You sleaze.
Prue: It wasn't exactly our first date, Piper.
Piper: High school doesn't count. That was last decade. Spill it.
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Phoebe: So what should we do ?
Prue: Well, either we could rely on our vicious guard cat to protect us or we could remember to lock the doors.
Phoebe: That's a really good idea, Prue.
Piper: Okay, we have to call the cops and report it as a break in.
Prue: And tell them what ? That someone broke into our house to try steal our broomsticks ?
Piper: Whoa, time out. What's going on here ?
Victor #1: Don't worry about it, sweetie. Everything's gonna be fine
Victor #2: Don't trust him.
Piper: Wait a second. Last week we had no dad and now we have two?
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Phoebe: Piper ! I am so busted, aren't I ?
Piper: Are you out of your mind, again ?
Phoebe: No, I'm the Amazing Phoebe.
Mark: What happened ?
Piper: I'm a good witch, remember ?
Mark: But how ?
Piper: I don't know. I panic, I put up both hands and bad things tend to freeze.
Mark: For how long ?
Piper: Not very, let's go.
Piper: I've never seen anybody killed before
Prue: Jeremy
Phoebe: Javna
Piper: I mean human.
Piper: Leave it to me to fall for a dead guy.
Phoebe: It's an improvement. At least he wasn't a warlock.
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Piper: This is the spell we have to say ?
Phoebe: Yeah. We're lucky. If we were men looking for women the spell requires putting a piece of honey cake in a sweaty armpit for days.
Hans: Morning.
Prue: Uh, excuse me but who are you ?
Piper: Who cares ?
Phoebe: Don't worry. We had safe sex. A lot of safe sex.
Piper: Ewe.
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Rex: Prue, your, um, sister is here to see you. She's waiting in your office.
Prue: Which sister ?
Rex: The one who upon seeing your office said "Damn, I should go back to college".
Prue: Phoebe.
Phoebe: Okay, I can't hold this in any longer. Your name isn't Piper and that's the good news. You're really Hecate, queen of the underworld. You're pregnant with the demon child, which means, I'm afraid I have to kill you.
Piper: What ?
Phoebe: Not to worry. You have plenty of time. I still have to find the jeweled poingnard to kill you with.
Piper: It's so romantic. Just like a fairy tale. And once Elliot is out of her spell, Jade's out of luck, no wedding, no honeymoon night.
Prue: No honeymoon, no sex and no sex, no monster child spending alternate weekends with daddy.
Piper: That's easy for you to say. You'll never great your husband at the door with: "Honey, I think I froze the kids."
Prue: No, I've just accidentally moved them to another zip code.
Phoebe: But I will see them, find them, and bring them back safely.
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Phoebe: No I did not kiss him at homecoming. I was helping him find a contact lens.
Piper: Oh, please. You were all over him with your breasts all, whatever.
Phoebe: I didn't have breasts back then.
Piper: Phoebe, you've always had breasts.
Piper: So we can just consider this a friendly competition.
Phoebe: Sibling rivalry.
Piper: War.
Phoebe: Exactly
Leo: Uh, so, does Phoebe work here ?
Piper: Phoebe ? No. No. No. No. No. No. She's probably at her gay and lesbian group right about now.
Phoebe: Wait, Leo, what did Piper say to you ?
Leo: Uh, it doesn't matter, really just forget it.
Phoebe: Well, whatever she said, you should probably take it with a grain of salt, cuz sometimes her medication makes her say the strangest things. But, not to worry her shrinks are on it.
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| האמת נמצאת שם... והיא כואבת |
Prue: Thanks. Is this leaded ?
Piper: Nope.
Prue: It's not ?
Piper: Never has been. I just say this because it's ridiculous to make two pots of coffee when you're the only one who drinks diesel.
Leo: Morning, ladies. I should be able to finish the stairs today.
Piper: Okay, um, I'll make some more coffee.
Phoebe: And I'll bring it to you.
Piper: Oh, here we go again, right ?
Phoebe: Piper, we both know the only reason I like Leo is because you do. Okay, I have no idea why I just said that.
Phoebe: I can't believe it.
Prue: Look who's talking. Little Miss Spell of the week.
Phoebe: No, no. I mean I can't believe you actually took my advice. The biggest pooper at the Wicca party has finally used her power for personal gain. It's about time.
Piper: Oh my God, this could be very dangerous.
Phoebe: I'm kinda diggin' it. Piper what do you really think of your boss ?
Piper: I think he's a self-serving jerk who must have a very small penis. Oh my God, I'm gonna be so fired.
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Piper: Maybe Andy can help.
Prue: Oh, yeah. You want to have that conversation with him ? "Hey Andy, I hate to bother you but this seventeenth century warlock is trying to kill me and my sisters. Any thoughts ?"
Piper: Okay, it was a bad idea.
Phoebe: Okay, come on you guys. It'll be just like the summer by the lake. Remember we made a blood oath to be friends forever, not just sisters.
Piper: I remember my finger got infected.
Prue: Ow. Yeah, but the oath worked.
Piper: And I couldn't go in the water for three weeks. Don't hand me that knife.
Piper: I can't stand the sight of blood.
Prue: Evil beings have blown up in our attic...
Phoebe: Disintegrated to dust right before our very eyes...
Prue: And you're afraid of a little drop of blood
Prue: We weren't all troublemakers, Phoebe.
Phoebe: I was not a troublemaker. I was just...
Piper: A pain.
Phoebe: A free spirit.
Prue: A handful.
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Phoebe: Prue's new look is perfect for an SHW.
Prue: SHW?
Phoebe: Single hot witch.
Phoebe: If you ran an employment agency wouldn't you want me?
Prue: Maybe, but I'd definitely want my suit back.
Phoebe: No, this is part of your old wardrobe. I'm just recycling.
Prue: Well the environment thanks you.
Phoebe: But take it off. Yeah, I know! I know!
Phoebe: You, Leo, last night, dish.
Piper: Well it's been awhile since I you know... I was a little nervous and I kinda kept-freezing him.
Prue: Piper, you didn't!
Piper: I didn't mean to... the first time.
Phoebe: I mean between you and Leo and Prue the new hot Wicca woman, and me... soon to be employed, things are looking up.
Piper: Don't say that. The moment somebody says that everything always goes south.
Phoebe: Unless you freeze him! Oh, I couldn't help it! It was so good!
Leo: Is it all right if I go upstairs and fix the bathroom sink?
Phoebe: Oh, knock yourself out Leo. (after he leaves) Did anyone ever think that maybe he's a warlock?
Piper: Why is it always someone I'm dating that gets accused of being that? Don't answer that! (the phone rings) Answer that. It's safer.
Phoebe: Prue was right about Rex, which means I'm dating a warlock.
Piper: Been there, done that.
Piper: You're leaving, aren't you?
Leo: Yeah, afraid so.
Piper: Do you really have to go?
Leo: Well I fixed everything I came here to fix. But I'll be back, promise. Nothing can keep me away from you too long.
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Piper: People don't like to dwell on things that end badly.
Prue: Yeah, well I wish my relationships ended that badly. Did you hear them last night? There was music, there was wine, there was-
Piper: Talking. And how do you know there was wine?
Prue: Okay so I peeked. Well, you know, if nobody tells me anything I have to get creative.
Phoebe: Oh couldn't you just skip a step or two?
Prue: Phoebe, I cannot risk this auction house's reputation on something like this without checking on it first.
Phoebe: Come on, come on, come on, I will uh- what will I do? I will... cook you dinner!
Prue: Oh, don't threaten me... Fine, I'll see what I can do.
Prue: Look I just get this really bad feeling about Clay. I can't explain it.
Piper: I can. You don't think he's good enough for her, just like you didn't think Jeremy was good enough for me. Of course in his case you were right, but that's not the point.
Phoebe: We can't live together forever! What do we expect, to be sixty years old and still be sharing clothes and a cat?
Piper: Well now that you put it that way, no! I don't want to live with you anymore!
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Phoebe: We still need to take a trip to the Army-Navy store.
Prue: Why ?
Phoebe: To get a flare gun.
Piper: Screw you bitch !
Phoebe: Okay, I think we need to hurry.
Phoebe: Besides that's your world. I need to find one of my own.
Prue: You will.
Piper: Just stay out of my world or I?ll kill you. Kidding. It's a joke.
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Phoebe: I know, I know, but choosing the right good luck charm is a very big decision.
Prue: If they all bring good luck, what's the worse that can happen if you choose the wrong one?
Phoebe: Alright, you know, this is why I like shopping with Piper.
Morris: I can't believe you're wearing the serial shoes again.
Andy: They're my good luck charms.
Morris: They're embarrassing.
Prue: What exactly are you implying ?
Andy: Prue, if you were in my shoes, what would you think ?
Prue: First of all, nobody should be in those shoes.
Morris: Told you.
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Piper: Phoebe, you could never keep a secret.
Phoebe: Oh. That is so not true.
Piper: Ok. Maybe Prue's surprise birthday party.
Prue: Guess again.
Piper: You knew ?
Prue: Mm-hmm.
Piper: Phoebe, you swore you wouldn't tell her.
Phoebe: I'm sorry. Ok ? It was an accident.
Leo: Well, she will. In the meantime, you must help me keep my secret or I could get into trouble. Piper and Prue can never know what I really am.
Phoebe: Me ? Keep a secret ? Hello, wrong Halliwell.
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Piper: So, what's the verdict?
Gas man: Bad.
Prue: Bad as in destroy my entire dinner party, or bad as in you can fix it quickly, it'll just cost more than my entire education?
Gas man: By tonight, there will be no more problems.
Prue: Oookay, I'm off.
Piper: Phoebe has a new power. She thinks of something and Poof-it appears!
Prue: I smell Book of Shadows. Did you do something?
Phoebe: Okay, I just saved Piper's ass. Where were you?
Piper: This a complete and total disaster! Somebody just kill me now and spare me the agony of cleanup!
Phoebe: Ask and you shall receive.
Prue: Phoebe, this isn't you.
Phoebe: Give the girl a prize!
Prue: We've tried everything, Piper. Besides, the only way to help Phoebe is from inside.
Piper: Help her kill us maybe.
Phoebe: Please, you've got to help me, down in the basement!
Piper: Trap.
Prue: Yeah, well what else can we do?
Piper: We could not go to the basement. I'd vote for that.
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Piper: I'm gonna have to wash my hair in the kitchen sink if I want to get to work on time. Do you know which one is the real Prue yet ?
Phoebe: Oh, I don't know. It could be the upstairs bathroom hogging Prue, or the downstairs bathroom hogging Prue, or the sitting in the kitchen drinking all the coffee Prue.
Prue: So, you guys need to tell the other me. We might be having this conversation all over again.
Piper: I'm not talking to that clone.
Prue: You have to.
Phoebe: Did anybody take notes ?
Piper: I'm not talking to that clone.
Phoebe: And the end of crowded bathrooms, the end of no hot water and the end of three Prue's hogging al the good clothes.
Prue: You know one day you might hear what you actually sound like.
Phoebe: And I will find myself sassy and delightful.
Prue: I won't count on it. Alright, to me, myself and I and to you guys. I couldn't have done it without you, thank you.
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Little Prue: That's my doll.
Little Piper: You gave it to me.
Little Prue: No I didn't. You stole it.
Prue: That's true. You did steal it.
Piper: I did not! Shh!
Prue: She knows you did.
Piper: Shh!
Little Prue uses her power to steal the doll from little Piper.
Piper: Hey, that's not fair!
Little Prue: You're pretty.
Prue: So are you.
Piper: Oh, give me a break.
Piper: I can't believe we got arrested for kidnapping ourselves.
Prue: Yeah, well, it should make for a pretty interesting defense.
Piper: What ? I'm supposed to throw out perfectly good flowers 'cause they came from a creep ? If that was the rule we'd never have flowers in this house.
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Piper: Now they have got the right idea.Phoebe: Who, the nuns ?
Piper: Yep, nice safe environment.
Phoebe: Yeah, if you like monks.
Piper: Stress free, no need to worry about guys, no wardrobe.
Phoebe: No wardrobe ? Okay, now you're scaring me.
Phoebe: Well, that's great. I knew you'd have a great time.
Piper: No, Phoebe, this is exactly what I did not want to happen. Is that water I hear running ?
Phoebe: Uh, water ? I don't know, maybe just a little. Hey, you know, just out of curiosity, if you were the water shut of valve, where would you be ?
Prue: Hey, um, you can sleep in my room and I'll sleep with Piper.
Brendan: Why ?
Prue: Because Phoebe kicks.
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Prue: Piper being outted would only make our lives worse.
Piper: We don't know that. At least I could tell Dee what we were doing and give her some hope.
Phoebe: No, Prue's right. If we're exposed we're gonna have every crazy hounding us day and night.
Prue: Not to mention the media circus on our front lawn. Remember ET ?
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Prue: Okay, so then how do we say the spell?
Phoebe: Our spirits would have to say it. Meaning one of us would have to die for it to actually work.
Prue: Keep looking.
Phoebe: Right.
Phoebe: Hey, you guys since we don't know how to vanquish the ghost we have to try to stop him from killing his next.. victim. Am I interrupting something ?
Andy: No, we're done. What do you mean stop him from killing his next victim ? How do we do that ?
Phoebe: I have a power too you know.
Phoebe: What was that ?
Prue: Ah, probably a zombie or vampire.
Phoebe: Great, where's Buffy when you need her ?
Prue: One killer cocktail. Literally. Little bit of oleander, St. Jensen weed, blood wart, among other things. Stops the heart immediately.
Phoebe: Okay, you're scaring me. Where did you learn to do that ?
Prue: Book of Shadows.
Phoebe: Where ? Under Dr. Kavorkian ?
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Prue: Okay, now would be a very good time to get angry. Oooh, Grandma's car-fender dented, um you got blamed for it, I did it. (Phoebe throws the dark lighter across the room)
Phoebe: I got grounded for that Prue!
Leo: When I die...
Piper: You're not gonna die.
Leo: When it happens, know this is where I want to be. I love you.
Piper: He could have stayed with us. He could've fought harder.
Phoebe: He was in pain. He had to let go.
Piper: He didn't have to. Our magic's never failed before. I cast the spell I took his power. All he had to do was show me how to do it and he never did!
Phoebe: How can you be mad at him?
Piper: Because it should've worked! Prue's having premonitions and you figured out how to use her power. Why couldn't I find the trigger? Why couldn't he just help me... give me his power...
Phoebe: He wanted to live. He didn't want to leave you... It's hard to lose someone you love.
Prue: It's hate. Hate is his trigger.
Phoebe: Then hate him.
Prue: No problem.
Leo: The last thing I remember, I was bandaging a soldier's head wound and I felt this sharp pain. And the next thing I know I was floating, surrounded by whitelighters. They offered me immortality and a chance to help special people like you. And I never once ever doubted that I didn't make the right choice...until I met you. Ever since all I can think is how I'd give it up to have a mortal life again, to have a family, to grow old...with you.
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Phoebe: Why'd you do that?
Piper: What am I supposed to say? That I'm a cash strapped single restaurant manager who still lives in the same house I grew up in with my sisters?
Phoebe: And the cat...don't forget our cat.
Phoebe: Okay, pinch me.
Prue: What?
Phoebe: No, I mean it, pinch me. I want to make sure I'm awake. Because if I am, I am having one killer deja vu.
Phoebe: Okay, Joanne here is the network food segment producer. She's about to brag about how she's happily married to some rich guy, how she's following her dreams, how she's had a really bad nose job...okay I added the last part.
Piper: Uh, Joanne, I-I'm so sorry but I can't do the segment right now, um something's happened, something bad. I have to go.
Joanne: What, run out of marinera sauce?
Piper: Look, I know I don't have the flashy job, or the flashy ring or the flashy designer suit, but that doesn't make me less than you or anybody else. And just because I may not have realized my dreams yet like you think you have doesn't mean I won't find a way to do exactly that. And when I do you can be damn sure I'll be doing it with my own nose and not the one some discount doctor gave me.
Prue: We may not be murderers but we're no angels either.
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