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| גן העדן של הבובות - פרק כפול |
Phoebe: Piper! Hi! You're never gonna believe this. I think I have a new power. It would certainly explain a lot of my weird behaviour lately like why I wanted to date Chad, why my advice has been so amazingly accurate. I know, this is huge, right? Huge. So what's my new power you ask? Well, I'll tell you. Um, do you remember that empath we helped a couple of years ago? That guy that could feel what other people were feeling?
Chris: Uh, Phoebe...
Phoebe: Just a sec. I think that's what I am now. An empath. I am an empath. That's my new power. Or at least an advancement of my premonition power, I don't know.
Chris: Neither does she, I'm afraid. Know that is, anything. Paige erased her memory.
Piper: Can you blow things up too?
(בנוגע לכלב אוסקר - )
Paige: Don't tell me you can read his feelings now, too.
Phoebe: No, but if I start licking your toes, run.
Paige: Who are you calling? Spells R' Us?
(בנוגע לבגדי הלוחם של ליאו - )Phoebe: What was up with that skirt?
Paige: At least it wasn't plaid.
Phoebe: If Piper ever does get her memory back, she's gonna kill you.
Chris: Why?
Phoebe: Because she hates wearing those silly costumes as much as we do.
Phoebe: If Leo did do something to block Piper's pain, how do we unblock it without him?
Paige: Magical laxative.
Phoebe: Okay, eww.
Phoebe: Yeah, you see after you left, Piper was really...
Paige: Chipper! Yeah. Incessantly... Increasingly... Annoyingly...chipper.
Phoebe: What she said.
Leo: Well, it was supposed to make her feel less pain. I guess with me not around to pull it back a little bit, she got happier and happier.
Paige: Umm, no! Psychotically chipper!
Phoebe: Oh, my god. Darryl, what happened?
Darryl: I think I just got attacked by Attila the Hun.
Paige: Why does she always pick on me first?
Phoebe: Well serves you right, what kind of a spell was that?
Paige: Oh and that was so much better.
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Chris: Before you get mad, you're the one who wanted me to have a charge in the first place, remember?
Leo: Yeah, to protect her!
Natalie: Oh, he was using protection.
Chris: Yeah, I don't think that's what he meant.
Piper: You're asking me to remember what I've apparently forgotten?
Paige: Yes, I spilled coffee on my blouse yesterday. So that dork walking around the office with the big old stain on her shirt that would be me.
Piper: Hey, don't forget your coats, it might rain.
Paige: Would you stop mothering us please?!
Piper: Oh, hey, hi! Did you see our little magic act?
Piper: Wyatt, sweetie? Remember your friend, Mr. Dragon?
Piper: Well a merry-go-round has lots of animals. A carousel just has horses.
Paige: Why do you even know that, wierdo?
Paige: So you're saying Wyatt, conjured a dragon?
Piper: Yep, right out of the TV.
Phoebe: Oh, you must be so proud.
Piper: ou might want to take, an alternate route to work, in the morning.
Piper: Wyatt! Where are you taking Mommy? Wyatt?
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Margo: Well, from where I'm standing, that seemed like a stupid thing to do. And I know a lot about stupid things!
Piper: Yeah, see, she's got us there.
Paige: Someone is after the book every week.
Marble: Well check what these common witches just did. We are standing in home of the Charmed Ones. We got their powers, we got their book. And we've got blonde multi-tonal hair!
Mitzi & Margo: Oh yeah!
Mabel: There's nothing wrong with Phoebe's, Mitzy. You'll get to levitate.
Mitzy: Yeah. Six feet in the air.
Margo: Let's go, let's go! I'm dying to orb some place far away and exotic... like Fort Lauderdale!
Piper: Just don't forget a hat for those ears.
Elf Nanny: I always keep the baby warm.
Piper: I meant yours.
Chris: Hey, I am not unreasonable. We can hunt demons after lunch.
Mitzy: We got 'em now.
Piper: Yeah, you got us now, so why don't you blow us up?
Phoebe: Piper, death bad. Life good.
Paige: Don't worry, that bimbo couldn't hit the broad side of a beauty parlor. Check out that dye job.
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Chris: Looks like we're one big happy family again.
Leo: You're not family.
Paige: Next time when I tell you to butt out. Butt out!
Paige: Ok, this empath thing? Very annoying!
Piper: Copy that.
Phoebe: So what do you guys want me to do?? Keep all your feelings to myself?
Paige & Piper: Yes!
Phoebe: Someone is hiding something from me.
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Paige: Call me butter, 'cause I'm on a roll!
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Chris: I don't have to answer that.
Leo: I thought you said you had nothing to hide.
Chris: I don't have to answer that either.
Phoebe: I've surrendered to being the middle sister.
Phoebe: Piper, how did you have time to book Steadman in your club? Between raising my nephew and trying to date and vanquishing...
Piper: A sister?
Piper: What the hell is going on?
Paige: Bitch later, vanquish now.
Phoebe: I love watching lawyers explode.
Piper: Sold, to the dead Grimlock.
Piper: Apparently, he's trying to scare away all of my dates. You little runt. Did your father teach you that?
Phoebe: Okay, so not the time.
Piper: Right... You're grounded.
Leo: Thanks for not listening to me.
Chris: Anytime.
Chris: I think he's gone. He looks gone. Do you think he's gone?
Leo: No.
Chris: Neither do I.
Chris: Man, you are old.
Piper: What's going on?
Paige: Oh, you know, just, uh... summoning a ghost.
Phoebe: You know, not getting any is making you bitter.
Phoebe: I have half a mind to call Jason and complain about it, but I don't want to use our relationship for leverage.
Piper: What's the use of sleeping with your boss then?
Phoebe: Because I actually enjoy sleeping with my boss.
Piper: Yeah, don't brag.
Piper: You need a hand?
Phoebe: Uh, sure, if you wanna go get my car washed, go to the dry cleaners for me, and go to work for me, too. That would be great.
Piper: Only if you can run the club, go to the dentist and raise Wyatt for me.
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Phoebe: Oh...I'll tell you, Elise better find me a new assistant, because pretty soon she's gonna have to "Ask Phoebe" to take my foot out of her...
Piper: Now, honey, promise me that before you ever touch this thing you'll play lots of baseball and football and do lots of other normal stuff.
Mordaunt: Welcome to your new destiny.
Piper: Oh, crap
Phoebe: We're videoconferencing. We just open our laptops, and there we are. In color.
Piper: Hmm, in each others laps.
Paige: What's wrong with the disposal, anyway?
Piper: Not disposing. Washer not washing, cable not cabling.
Phoebe: The sword in the stone?
Piper: Oh you gotta be kidding me.
Paige: So what should we do then Merlin?
Mordaunt: Oh no, my name's Mordaunt. Merlin's just a fairy tale.
Piper: Ha Ha!
Mordaunt: But Camelot was not.
Paige: Ha!
Phoebe: Oh Paige! You're fired.
Paige: In fact I quit.
Dwarf: Kiss my grumpy ass!
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Piper: Chris, i'm a mother, I just can't go off killing babies no matter how evil they are.
Piper: So you told him he loved you before he told you he loved you?
Phoebe: Mmm hmm.
Piper: Yeah that's not good.
Phoebe: Oh Chris, don't overreact.
Chris: I'm overreacting? There is a demon in the playpen!
Phoebe: You stay away from my nephew, and don't you shimmer after him either or I'll bind your powers!
Chris: Just out of curiosity, what's the elders' policy on vanquishing demon babies?
Leo: Why?
Chris: Because there's one playing with Wyatt in his playpen as we speak.
Chris: What are you doing here?
Leo: Communing with the others.
Chris: Can any one see us?
Leo: Not me, but you look like a lunatic talking to yourself up here.
Piper: Aren't you glad you didn't kill me now?
Phoebe: This is all Jason's fault.
Leo: How is that?
Phoebe: Uh--you're a guy. You wouldn't get it.
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Piper: No, it looked more like a bird.
Paige: A bird. So you're saying maybe the Audubon Society sent the demon after us?
Leo: Yeah, see, the way time travel works-
Phoebe: Yeah, I don't wanna know. I already have a headache.
Lee: Do you have to leave so soon? Can't I help?
Bianca: Yeah. Someday, when I ask you what it feels like to kill, don't lie to me. Don't tell me you don't feel a thing.
Elise: You can always send in the column. Email, fax machine! It's the 21st century and I'd like to welcome you to it!
Leo: Paige, when I said I need you I meant a fully clothed you.
Leo: What would you say if I told you whoever attacked Chris was called a "phoenix"?
Paige: Well, I would say "what's a phoenix", and then you'd probably tell me!
Piper: Oh my God, what are you - a peeping elder or something?
Piper: I'm not going to freeze him. I'm so nervous I'd probably blow him up.
Phoebe: Well...
Piper: Gutter! Gutter. Gutter.
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Penny: You are exactly what we're all about, Paige. You want to hear my dream? I dream of a crusade to rid the world of evil, not through fighting or the inner anger that makes us want to fight, but through the magic power of love.
Paige: Are you sure you're Penny Halliwell?
Grams: Your grandfather Allen, rest his soul, was a sweet man, but he led me straight down the hippie-dippie trail.
Grams: Don't make too much out of it, because whatever you do, you can't change the past or tell anyone you're from the future.
Phoebe: Well, why does he get to?
Chris: Because I know what I'm doing.
Grams: Not from where I'm standing.
Paige: Allen, your first husband?
Penny: My first and only. I'm not that into free love.
Penny: Do you have an active power?
Paige: Yeah. I can orb.
Penny: Groovy. Hey, everyone! We have a witch here who can orb!
Leo: Right on. Lay some orbs on us, sister.
Leo: Listen, if you want some private coaching, there's an empty room upstairs. You dig?
Paige: Ugh. No, I don't dig.
Penny: It's why we're gathering here tonight, for a magical be-in.
Paige: Oh, like a human be-in. When Timothy Leary said, "Tune in, turn on, drop out."
Penny: No, there's no acid allowed in the manor, Paige. We're all on a contact high.
Paige: I'm not on drugs. I'm just having a bad trip.
Grams: Nonsense. You can't damage an old warhorse like me. I'm already dead.
Grams: I think that we should take the demon into our arms and make it feel safe.
Piper: I don't have a lot of people to hang out with, aside from my baby who doesn't really say much and then one really neurotic white lighter.
Grams: Have you tried talking to the slime?
Penny: Who wants a ride on the rainbow bus?
Grams: Dear, you have Paige stuck in the past and a demonic blob roaming the manor. Exactly how are you "handling things"?
Paige: It's not magic free, it's just... magic lite.
Grams: Men are like utensils, you use them, wash them, and throw them in the drawer until the you need them.
Chris: You know the only reason why she's even here is Paige missed a vanquish.
Leo: Another one?
Chris: Yeah, that makes, what? Five in a row now?
Paige: You guys are such nags.
Phoebe: Okay, you two really need to get a room.
Phoebe: And be careful with my origami! That tiger took two frickin' hours!
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Paige: Well, uh, this is your birthday present...from me. Although, you know, Phoebe helped.
Piper: The breakfast?
Paige: No, the muchacho.
Phoebe: Piper, wait!
Piper: No! Not until you send him back to wherever the hell you conjured him from.
Paige: We can't, not until your birthday's over.
Phoebe: Yeah, so why not take advantage of him while you can? I mean, figuratively speaking.
Paige: Ah, hell, literally. It is your birthday.
Paige: Has a really big -
Phoebe: Paige!
Paige: Uh! Is this the perfect guy or what?
Phoebe: All right. Throw it in.
Phoebe: But Paige, we can't just conjour up a sex toy!
Chris: So what did he [the demon] look like?
Piper: Tall, hooded and with a metal rod thingy.
Chris: Well that narrows it down.
Darryl: Is this some kind of demonic thing?
Chris: No. It's some sort of messed-up thing.
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Paige: I don't know. 'Cause there's like a gajillion miles of this stupid maze? They could be anywhere.
Piper: I'm confused. How does cleansing her aura get Jason back?
Paige: No, Phoebe didn't cast the spell. Richard did.
Piper: Richard wants Jason back?
Paige: Since when do you speak Freedom Fry?
Paige: Then how do you explain my sister walking around like she's in the nudie version of "Les Mis"? .
Piper: By the looks of it, a French hooker.
Paige: Ow! You did that on purpose.
Piper: Yes, I did.
Phoebe: ...Especially since I hate the French.
Piper: No you don't, you love everything about France.
Phoebe: Oh. Maybe I just hate getting dumped!
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Piper: Come on neurotic people, we have to deal with my neurosis.
Phoebe: Sure. Which one?
Piper: If I had legs, I would kick ya!
Phoebe: We can't just keep that head on our foyer table. You know? What is it? A centerpiece?
Piper: Leo, this is what is keeping me from helping Wyatt.
Paige: And me from helping Richard.
Phoebe: And me from helping...me.
(פיבי מחבקת את עצמה אחרי שהיא חוזרת לגוף שלה)
Paige: Do you want me to get you a room.
Herman: Whoa. It's Piper Halliwell.
Slick: Yeah but only part of her...and not even the good part either.
Paige: Slick!
Piper: Can it.
Piper: Don't give me that look. I still got a mouth. I could turn you into a toad.
Phoebe: So lets just put our heads together and ...you know what I mean, right?
Piper: Alright, head count.
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Paige: You! Oh my god, you are sick! What is wrong with you? You're disgusting!
Chris: No!
Paige: You are some creepy registered sex offender from the future!
Chris: No, no, no...
Paige: Oh my god, you are so gross!
Chris: If we don't do something soon I could end up half fireman instead of half whitelighter!
Chris: If Piper and Leo don't screw, I'm screwed!
Chris: I'm sensing some real issues here.
Phoebe: Oh, you're damn right there are issues. You can't just pop in from the future and play with people's lives because your big brother picked on you.
Phoebe: I've been calling for you all week! Didn't you hear me?
Chris: The first couple of days, yeah, then I put you on mute.
Chris: Can we focus here, please? Mom and Dad need to have sex. Now who's going to tell them? You or me?
Phoebe: I never hit on you, did I?
Phoebe: I still want to know why we didn't die?...What? I'm curious.
Phoebe: Would you relax?
Chris: Relax? I'm sorry, did you say relax? Because I'm about to disappear, vanish forever, cease to exist.
Phoebe: Oh my God. You are so dramatic!
Phoebe: We're gonna do this my way mister!
Chris: Master.
Phoebe: You're laughing at me? I'm trying to be sympathetic and you're laughing at me!?
Piper: Do I need to call Chris to shut you up?
Phoebe: You wouldn't!
Piper: Try me.
Jenny: When I get out of here the first thing I'm gonna do is rid the world of witches.
Paige: Oh yeah, when you're back in your bottle the first thing I'm gonna do is put you in the microwave. Ha!
Leo: It says it right here on the bottle.
Phoebe: Oh, right there...in Arabic!
Paige: Don't you need to go help Major Nelson?
Piper: You look ridiculous.
Phoebe: I feel ridiculous.
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Piper: Well at least he decided to attack after the party. That was nice of him.
Chris: Yes! I'm back!
Piper: She's being weird since she changed her hair color. She'll probably change it back.
Piper: No, it's not huge because it's not possible. It's crazy, 'cause I'm not pregnant.
Paige: Yeah.
Phoebe: Yeah.
Piper: No I'm not, I mean how could that happen? I mean, I know how that could happen. But... it... what am I going to do?
Paige: When on Earth, you should do as Earthlings do.
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Paige: Phoebe, are you gonna let someone with a giant helmet that passes for hair talk to you like that?
Paula: To the rest of the world, you might be "Ask Phoebe", but to us, you'll always be "Freebie".
Paige: Well, as someone who's seen Carrie, both versions, I'd say the reunion is over.
Paige: And she's under the influence.
Chris: Of alchohol?
Paige: No. Adolecence.
Phoebe: Are you crazy or stupid?
Phoebe: Well I'd rather be rich then a bitch!
Ramona: Could I please have your autograph?
Phoebe: Yeah but I normally charge twenty dollars per autograph.
Ramona: Oh, I think I have a twenty here.
Phoebe: I'm kidding.
Piper: Why what happened?
Paige: Um...this woman called her 'Freebie'.
Piper: Oh yeah, that would've done it.
Paula: Is this Freebie?
Phoebe: You bet your ass. And I'm comin' for you bitch!
Paige: Icky stuff!
Piper: Icky stuff?
Paige: Hey, it worked, didn't it?
Chris: Don't worry. You'll learn to like orbing in the future.
Victor: Did I take you to batting cages?
Chris: No.
Victor: Strip clubs?
Chris: God no!
Chris: I've got some Scabbers on my tail.
Piper: Well, I've got some hydrogen peroxide...
Chris: Uh, what is the gi-got?
Waiter: Ze gigot is your choice. Leg of lamb or mutton.
Chris: Oh, what is that, meat?
Waiter: Yes, is meat. Comes from a sheep, you know? Baa-baa.
Victor: So, in the future, we're close?
Chris: Yeah Grandpa, you're awesome.
Victor: Did you hear that? Awesome.
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Chris: I have an idea. Let's change the subject.
Chris: Wait...the womb?! He had powers from the womb?! That's unbelievable! It's not like I don't have an inferiority complex with him already. Thank you.
Leo: Damn it!
Paige: Are Elders even allowed to swear?
Leo: No, but fathers are. Especially ones whose kid just tried to kill them.
Paige: Bug spray. I should've used bug spray.
Piper: I don't want to interrupt her date with Mark.
Paige: It's Mike this week.
Chris: Actually, it's Mitch.
Piper: Well, you will be happy to know that..you're a boy!
Paige: I don't see it...
Piper: Well, it's that little thing right there...
Chris: Do you mind?!
Paige: No wonder Chris grows up to be a neurotic little freak.
Paige: Aren't there therapists in the future?
Piper: This whole family needs a shrink.
Leo: Phoebe, Paige. How are you?
Phoebe: Not so good. We have a problem.
Leo: Perhaps we should meditate...
Paige: Are you hormonal, or are you just plain crazy!?
Piper: A woman can only take so much...
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Elder: What do you have to say for yourself, Barbas?
Barbas: I'm a demon. What do you expect?
Phoebe: She's just grumpy because she hasn't had her coffee yet.
Paige: I am not grumpy!... Okay maybe I am.
Paige: There's four of them. How do they break a tie?
Leo: You don't wanna know.
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Phoebe: Wow, did you conjure him or clone him?
Paige: You're the one who kept telling me I needed a break!
Phoebe: Yeah, but I meant take a day off, go to the spa, have a pedicure, get a massage!
Mr. Right: I massage her.
Paige: Shhh.
Phoebe: Dear Sad in San Jose, try Viagra...
Phoebe: It's just me! It's Phoebe!
Piper: Phoebe? Here to save me or kill me?
Phoebe: I haven't decided yet.
Paige: I came to tell you that Chris has been arrested. Long story.
Leo: Did you call Darryl?
Paige: That's the other problem, 'cause see Darryl's the one that arrested him. Longer story.
Chris: You talking about me?
Phoebe: No, your fetus.
Piper: I'm pregnant, not stupid!
Leo: What are you doing?
Phoebe: I'm trying to orb.
Leo: You don't orb.
Phoebe: Now's not the time to rub that in.
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Piper: You, don't touch me, you're the reason I look like this!
Male Gamesmaster: If human beings are foaming at the mouth to humiliate themselves on national television, and they are, then demons are an easy mark.
Female Gamesmaster: Upper level humans?
Male Gamesmaster: Donald Trump has his own show.
Demon: What did I ever do to you?!
Chris: You're sure he's a demon right?
Demon: Does that give you the right to commit unprovoked acts of violence against me?!
Phoebe: Looks like your show's just been cancelled.
Piper: You stabbed her?
Paige: You would've too!
Chris: Yeah, she was pretty annoying.
Phoebe: Saving my nephew... or kleptomaniac demon...? I really need those books, guys.
Piper: I'm trying to protect our son!
Leo: From who? The "mommy and me" teacher?
Tammy: Who are you?
Paige: We're the Charmed... uh one.
Phoebe: Paige, you're my baby sister. Not my babysitter.
Paige: Oh that's clever! That's very clever. I'm glad that when I'm panicking, you're able to be very clever!
Paige: At least it explains how the demon we trapped today knew how the witch died, he was watching it on TV. Pretty sick.
Leo: No sicker than any other reality TV show.
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Leo: No, it's too dangerous. Remember the last time you went through a portal - you were almost dinosaur kibble!
Chris: You know your time-travel section is due for a serious overhaul. I mean, I can find more information googling.
Gideon: Googling?
Chris: Never mind.
Evil Gideon: She's got a bad temper and it's even worse now that she's pregnant.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, it's the same in our world.
Paige: This is the bassinet from hell.
Doctor: How'd you like your dinner?
Piper: Are you kidding? The frozen peas and processed turkey - it was to die for!
Phoebe: She's having a baby.
Nurse: Oh, a baby! Oh why didn't you say so?
Paige: 'Cause we were just too excited...
Piper: Don't forget diapers! Lotsa diapers!
Chris: Okay, I need to get out of here.
Piper: Since when are you in such a hurry to say goodbye?
Phoebe: Well, since something happened with the thing, and the thing, with the thing.
Chris: Heh?
Piper: Jello! Do you want some? It's really yummy.
Evil Chris: Can you believe all the liqour stores are closed in the morning here? What's up with that?
Evil Leo: Didn't stop you from kicking the door in. Why didn't you orb?
Evil Chris: What's the fun in that?
Doctor: Does it hurt when I touch here?
Piper: Yeow! That smarts!
Phoebe: The plan is to go to the hospital and see Piper.
Paige: That's a really good plan.
Phoebe: I know.
Paige: Well if you ask me the grand design was pretty messed up already.
Phoebe: We should drive, I don't want to risk orbing.
Chris: Just watch your speed, okay?
Barbas: How cute. The big elder is scared of the itsy-bitsy baby.
Chris: You're laughing! That's great...your nephew is almost killed and you're laughing!
Phoebe: Nice knuckles. Brass?
Evil Phoebe: No, Tiffany's.
Paige: Think mean. Think nasty.
Phoebe: We must be some bad-ass witches in this world.
Paige: It's not dark...why is it not dark?
Nurse: Dark? Why would you say such a thing? Dark is evil and unhappy...why would you say that, unless you wanted to get shot!
Phoebe: My Sister, the joker...
Paige: So we're starring in a little movie called Pleasantville.
Phoebe: There are evil twins of us out there.
Phoebe: No time to doddle, there's a baby on the way.
Paige: Well, we can't very well ignore Chris' birth, we have to celebrate it.
Chris: I'm the baby, I give you permission not to!
Paige: Well, I'm sure the doctors are going to find out any minute, and everything is gonna be just peachy!
Doctor: Oh, I'm sorry, but rules are rules. Did you wanna keep your legs?
Barbas: She's out in cloud cuckoo land.
Piper: Phoebe, you really should not swear, they will cut your tongue out!
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