The Television Transcript Project
EastEnders
Written by: Tony Jordan
22 June 1995



British Air Date: Thursday, 22 June 1995. This is very probably episode #198 (in the second numbering series--after the first 952 episodes).

Synopsis: Nigel receives terrible news from the old Bill; Phil shows Kath the house; Ricky and Bianca get a chance to talk; Tiffany gets a job at the Vic; and people find out why the old Bill took Nigel to his flat.

In Cockney English: the "telly" is the T.V.; "nicked" means arrested (means stolen when referring to an object); a "mate" is a friend; "the khazi" is the men's rest room; "Cheers" means thank you or good-bye (and is sometimes a toast). to "put the mockers on" something is to mess up, spoil, or ruin it; "the old Bill" is the police; "brekkers" or "brekkie" is breakfast; a "sarnie" is a bready, buttery sort of sandwich; a "punter" is a customer; a "wind-up" is a practical joke; to get "shirty" is to get touchy/offended; a "gaff" is a place (like an apartment, shop); your "gear" is your stuff; and a "flat" is an apartment.

Note: "eh" is usually pronounced "Ay," like the name of the letter A, especially when at end of a sentence/question. Eh?

Braces {} enclose unclear speech.

KATH = KATHY = KATH
DEBS = DEBBIE = DEBS
TIFF = TIFFANY = TIFF

About 27 scenes.

About 24 characters: CLARE, DEBS, NIGEL, GRANT, PHIL, MARK, RUTH, KATHY, TIFFANY, PEGGY, IAN, NEIL, MRS. HARTLEY, POLICE SERGEANT, POLICE OFFICER, WINSTON, SANJAY, RICKY, BIANCA, PAULINE, RON, ART, MORTUARY ATTENDANT, and ABBEY. Cast list (cast.htm 3K)

When I printed this, it took 36 pages.

Transcribed via VCR tape and microcassette tape.


[EastEnders Intro with theme music (time: 00:27). Intro theme: Save music (417kb mp3).]
[The telly's on at the Bates' this morning, DEBS is brushing CLARE's hair as CLARE stands munching a piece of toast, watching a music video show (is at low volume). It's a subdued, rushed morning.]

CLARE
[quiet] Ow!

DEBS
Keep still then.

NIGEL
[coming in] L--I'll drop her off if you want.

DEBS
Oh, no, you got a delivery this morning, remember? Clare, we're gonna be late.

CLARE
Well--you're hurting me.

DEBS
Well you should have done it before when I told you.

NIGEL
Half an' hour won't make much difference.

DEBS
[to CLARE] Careful.
Look. Don't you think I've got enough to worry about without you losing your job as well? Clare, go an' get {me the car keys.} [(CLARE leaves)]

NIGEL
[joking] Can't sack me. [D: "Mmm."] I'm Indispensable.

DEBS
Famous last words. [calling to CLARE] Oh! {Watch} your homework.

NIGEL
W--I'll pick her up then.

DEBS
Oh, no no, I'm going into town lunchtime--I'll pick her up on my way back.

CLARE
[calling from hall] Got it. [she has her jacket and backpack on]

DEBS
Oh, right. Come on, then.

NIGEL
Ahm, need some money?

DEBS
No, no-no, I'm only gonna get {her that P.E. stuff}. Uh. Oh--have you paid the electric bill?

NIGEL
[dread] Oh no. I'll do it later.

DEBS
Well where is it?

NIGEL
In me pocket.

DEBS
Well Nigel, we'll get cut off.

NIGEL
[reassuring] I'll do it!

DEBS
Mmm--well make sure you do.

NIGEL
Come on.

[As they all leave, NIGEL keeps looking back into the flat, worried.]


[Outside the Arches, PHIL and GRANT are looking under a car's hood. (There are posters on the wall behind, one of Adam Ant.)]

PHIL
Well. Looks like the head's gone.

GRANT
I'd rather you to me, mate. [leans on side of car]

PHIL
[leans on car, too] {All right,} you don't fancy coming out {every} time, then.

GRANT
Yeah, I'd love to, but I've got a bit too much on today.

PHIL
[quiet] Yeah the trouble is, so have I, I'm supposed to be showin' Kathy around the house later.

GRANT
What, you told her?

PHIL
Yeah..

GRANT
And?

PHIL
Well I've been workin' on her all {night} but ah, I rather think the jury's still out.

GRANT
Wh--did she give you a hard time?

PHIL
[wry] Oh, just a bit.
Accused me of throwin' people out on the street, but uh, well, at least she's comin' around to have a look at it, an' all.

GRANT
Nah, she'll be all right. They love all that, don't they.

PHIL
What.

GRANT
Well, you know, house of their own, roses around the door. Dried flowers in the khazi.

PHIL
I don't know if that's what Kathy wants.

GRANT
She's a bird, i'n't she?

PHIL
Hn! You know, that's what I love about you. Your Ability to Delve Deep into the female psyche.

GRANT
Eh?


[Outside the Video Shop, the BATES', still talking, stop as NIGEL digs out his keys.]

DEBBIE
Hey, what'd'you want with your tea, yeah, I'll get you somethin' while I'm in town.

NIGEL
Oh, I don't mind! Uhm.. do you want me to phone ahead, Alert the shops you're on your way.

DEBBIE
[somewhat amused by his corniness] No thank you.

NIGEL
Element o' Surprise. Good thinkin'. [amused]

DEBBIE
Heh! See you later. [kisses his cheek]

NIGEL
See ya. See you, love.

[DEBBIE and CLARE leave. NIGEL is about to unlock the door when he notices PHIL and GRANT by that car.]

NIGEL
Morning girls!
[strolls over]
[funny guy] Here. Two goldfish in a tank. One of 'em turns to the other an', says, uh, [deep voice] "So, uh. Do you know how to drive this then?" Huh-ha ha!

PHIL
Morning Nige..

NIGEL
Tank: get it?

GRANT
Very good.

NIGEL
Yeah, I thought so.
[quiet] Um. I don't suppose there's any chance o' you uh.. shiftin' that stuff today, is there?

PHIL
I don' know Nige, I'm still waitin' on the phone call.

NIGEL
Oh. Only uh--you know--bein' of a nervous disposition, I'm startin' to jump every time the shop door opens.

GRANT
[to PHIL] What stuff's this?

PHIL
Oh, he's looking after some {nicky} carburetors for--

NIGEL
Forty-three, to be precise.

GRANT
Where're they from?

PHIL
{Ron Alhoppen.}

GRANT
What--is he out?

PHIL
Yes, three weeks ago, {as it happens.}

GRANT
Well--nice one--we should have him over for a beer.

PHIL
All right.

NIGEL
Loathe as I am to put the, uh, Mockers on your Class Reunion, [whispers] you don't think you can stash 'em somewhere else, could you?

PHIL
Just give me a couple more days, Nige.

NIGEL
I'll hold you to that.

GRANT
Don't worry, Nige, if you do get nicked, we'll come an' visit ya.

NIGEL
Oh, well, that's all right then. An' here was me worryin'.

PHIL
Look, they'll be out by Monday, all right.

NIGEL
I'm not cut out for all this. Got one of them faces that just looks naturally guilty.

PHIL
Monday. Promise.

NIGEL
[sigh] Yeah. Fine.. [wry] Here: what's four more sleepless nights between mates. [leaves]

GRANT
Right--I'm off.

PHIL
All right. See you later, then.

GRANT
[shaking hands with him] Yeah. And uh, good luck with Kath. [leaves]

PHIL
Yeah. Cheers. [shuts hood]

[Meanwhile, NIGEL's letting himself in the video shop, looking back, worried.]


[MARK's coming out of the cafe, goes to the stall. RUTH is minding the stall.]

RUTH
Well?

MARK
Tomorrow.
Three o'clock.

RUTH
Did you tell 'im anythin'?

MARK
Well, like what?

RUTH
Like, why we're goin'.

MARK
No need.

RUTH
[worried] Maybe you should o' warned him, so he's got, time to think about it.

MARK
He's a counsellor. It's his job to talk about what we wanna talk about.

RUTH
An' what if he doesn't want to help us?

MARK
Find one who can..


[PHIL and KATH are walking through the market, talking.]

PHIL
You'll love it.

KATH
Well, it doesn't matter if I do or don't, does it. Seein' as you already bought it.

[They pass TIFFANY, who knocks on the Vic door. (It's not open yet, and there's a sign in the door window: "EXPERIENCED BAR STAFF WANTED.")]


[RUTH and MARK's conversation continues.]

RUTH
I don't think we should tell anybody just yet. Do you?

MARK
There's nothing to tell. We don't even know if it's gonna be possible.

RUTH
And if it's not?

MARK
Well then it's not. At least {we won't pretend we don't know anymore.}

RUTH
Nyeah.. Listen: I better get back to work while I've still got a job.
{I know I gotta} concentrate. [kiss] See you later.

MARK
[appreciative] Definitely.


[PEGGY answers the door and lets TIFF inside.]

TIFFANY
Oh, hello.

PEGGY
Hello there. [locks door]
You got me message then.

TIFFANY
Yeah, Bianca said something about a quiet word.

PEGGY
Well, I don't know if you've heard, but I need a little bit of help, behind the bar.

TIFFANY
Oh, yeah, I saw the card.

PEGGY
Well? I've seen you in here, you seem to get on well with people, an' I wondered if you'd ever thought about it.

TIFFANY
Well, yeah, but the card said "experienced bar staff" and I've not done it before.

PEGGY
Huh! Well, we can soon train the right person.

TIFFANY
Yeah? Well me Uncle's got a pub in Brentwood an' he says that, bar work is sort--about ten percent know-how and 90 percent personality.

PEGGY
Yeah. Well I wouldn't argue with that. I've only been in the business five minutes meself.

TIFFANY
An' I suppose I have always worked with people.

PEGGY
Doing what?

TIFFANY
Oh, {board} mostly. First I was an {orderly rep,} an' then I was a Beautician.

PEGGY
You haven't done any bar work at all?

TIFFANY
[pre-rehearsed for interview] No. But um. I am a fast learner and I don't mind a bit of hard work.

PEGGY
I don't doubt it..

TIFFANY
[nice, pre-rehearsed] It's not exactly what I was looking for, but um, "nothing ventured nothing gained," is what I always say, so um: yeah I'll give it a go if you will.

PEGGY
Mm.


[PHIL and KATHY come out of Richard's old house, walk down the stairs talking. She's doubtful, noncommittal. He seems calm.]

PHIL
Well it might take a few weeks to get it sorted out, uh.

KATH
A few weeks?

(They're at the bottom of the stairs now, and just stand there to talk more--calm and face to face.)

PHIL
Yeah to get a proper crew in there, you know, knock the partitions down, give it a good tidy up an' that.

KATH
Yeah, it'll need to be redecorated. Top to bottom.

PHIL
Huh. So. You like it then.

KATH
I never said that. I just said that whoever lived there would need it to be re-decorated first.

PHIL
Oh.

KATH
Mind you, I.. I'm not sayin' that I don't like it either. L--how much will it cost to do {the lot}?

PHIL
Why not let me worry about it, eh.

KATH
Oh, so we're keeping this up then are we?

PHIL
Keeping what up?

KATH
You deciding everything for us. Maybe I would walk three steps behind you and all.

PHIL
No.

KATH
Well how much, then?

PHIL
Well. Not that much. I'll.. call in a few favours an', about a grand.
[(she looks doubtful)]
[amused, admitting] All right--a couple!

KATH
An' can we afford it.

PHIL
{I'll push it.}

KATH
And you really think we need something this big.

PHIL
Yeah, well just think what we could do with it.

KATH
Well, it could be nice.. {Maybe} we could make a {playroom} for Steve an' the twins.

PHIL
Exactly, we'll have a guest room, wouldn't we, we can e'en get your brother over to stay.

KATH
Well, don't hold your breath.

PHIL
New kitchen. Proper dining room.

KATH
[sigh] I just wish you'd talked to me about it first.

PHIL
Uh! I just wanted it to be a surprise.

KATH
Well you got that bit right.

PHIL
So. Do I get the work started or what. [slightly amused]

KATH
Oh I don't know.

PHIL
Oh, come on, Kath. You said yourself it'd be perfect for us.

KATH
Well what about all the people who were livin' here--the ones you threw out.

PHIL
Huh--I didn't throw anybody out--

KATH
Well--as good as. What about Ricky?

PHIL
Well, I've talked to him an', he knows all about it.

KATH
And?

PHIL
He's sweet as a nut.

KATH
Yeah, he wasn't at the time.

PHIL
Well he is now.
So. Wanna get the work started or what.

KATH
Look, can't we talk about it later. I've gotta get back to the cafe.

PHIL
Look, you've seen it now--you either like it or you don't.

KATH
W--like I said, it, it could be nice..

PHIL
Exactly. An' the sooner we get the work started the sooner we can move in.

KATH
[pause] Go on. Better start makin' your calls, then.

PHIL
Ya mean it.

KATH
I wouldn't say so otherwise, would I. But please: next time, just talk to me first?

PHIL
It's a deal. [kiss] So. Now you've forgiven me--

KATH
Half, forgiven you.

PHIL
Ha! All right, half, forgiven me. Any chance of a bit of breakfast? [massaging her shoulder]

KATH
Come over in half an hour. I'll see what I can do. [leaves]

[As PHIL looks after KATH leaving, IAN comes out of his house (next door).]

IAN
[coming down stairs] Surveying our empire, are we?

PHIL
No, as a matter of fact, I was just showin' your mum around the house.

IAN
Oh yeah?

PHIL
Mmm. And guess what?

IAN
What?

PHIL
[proud] She, Loves it.

IAN
Mmm--I'm very pleased for you.

PHIL
Well, I never doubted it for a minute.


[In the video shop, NIGEL's talking to NEIL (his helper guy--tall, thin youth). No one else is in the shop.]

NEIL
There's a, load of old boxes out there: hidden under some cardboards?

NIGEL
[anxious] You haven't touched 'em have you.

NEIL
[defensive] No..

NIGEL
[tense] Well don't. Go an' get us an egg an' bacon sarnie from the cafe. And get us some papers on the way back.
[gave him cash] Cheers, Neil.

[Just as NEIL leaves, MRS. HARTLEY is entering with two videos. She's an old woman who's apparently quite hard of hearing. NIGEL leans forward and talks loudly and carefully to her.]

NIGEL
[loud, friendly] Ah! Good morning, Mrs. "H."

MRS H
Ah! Good morning!
[comes to counter with tapes] I brought these back. I didn't understand them.

NIGEL
[loud] You didn't understand them?

MRS H
Neither did I! Full of Pakistani people, singing to each other.

NIGEL
[looking] Ah yeah. Well uh, ya see, they're--they're Indian Films, uh, Mrs. H. They're like musicals.

MRS H
Oh I like musicals.

NIGEL
But not these.

MRS H
Which one's that.

NIGEL
What?

MRS H
Which musicals?

NIGEL
No. Uh.. these, are musicals. For Aaasian people.

MRS H
Is Woody Allen in it?

NIGEL
What?

MRS H
I am a member.

NIGEL
Uh, yeah. Uh, far wall, Mrs. H: top three shelves. Everything you want is there. Gene Kelly, Fred Astaire, Woody Allen.

MRS H
English?

NIGEL
Absolutely.

MRS H
[quietly] I'm not a racist, you know. But I like what I like.

NIGEL
Don't we all. Top three shelves, Mrs. H.

MRS H
Very well. [goes to look]

[As she goes to look, NIGEL keys in her account.]

NIGEL
Oh. Uh. These are late, Mrs. H.

MRS H
Uhh, pardon?

NIGEL
[not worth the trouble] Doesn't matter.

PHIL
[comes in] All right, Nige?

NIGEL
All right.

PHIL
Listen, now, you got Colin's number?

NIGEL
Colin who?

PHIL
Colin {Baker.} He's a builder.

NIGEL
Oh, Cowboy Colin.

PHIL
Yeah, uh-huh.

NIGEL
[gets an address thing out and quietly asks] Um. Any news on the old uh, you-know-what. Only uh--you know--Neil's been snooping around there.

PHIL
Look: relax will you. I told you they'll be out by Monday.

NIGEL
Relax? I have a seizure every time the old Bill goes past.

PHIL
Has anyone ever told you you worry too much..

NIGEL
Yeah.. I like worryin'.

PHIL
Yeah, well you ca' have too much of a good thing, can't you.
Listen--thanks for this, and uh, do you fancy a bit of brekkie, {or anythin'}.

NIGEL
Uh, no, I ju' sent out for some.

PHIL
All right. I'll see you later, yeah?

NIGEL
Yeah. Cheers.

[PHIL leaves and NIGEL talks loudly to MRS. H.]

NIGEL
Uh. Find anything you like, Mrs. H?

MRS H
Oh, very well, thank you!


[GRANT comes in the back door of the Vic. He has a little ring case he looks at. He goes upstairs.]

PEGGY
[calls from downstairs] Grant? Is that you?

GRANT
[calling back] I'll be down in a minute.

PEGGY
[calling back] Okay love.

[GRANT, looking at the ring again, goes into the living room, shutting the door.]


[MRS. H is still in the video shop. She's made a selection and comes to the counter.]

NIGEL
Um. This is a western, Mrs. H.

MRS H
Sorry?

NIGEL
Cowboys an' Indi-- Um, people shootin' each other. No singin'.

MRS H
What is?

NIGEL
This one. It's not a musical.

MRS H
Well thank goodness for that.

NIGEL
What?

MRS H
Well I didn't understand a word of the last two you gave me.

NIGEL
[muttering] I think this is where I came in.

MRS H
Sorry?

NIGEL
Ah, nothing, uh, it doesn't matter, Mrs. H.
Uh. You're gonna love this one.
[leaning forward, loud and careful] It's an English Musical Western, with Woody Allen.

MRS H
Oh! Thank you. I'll see you in the morning.

NIGEL
[loud] Thank you. I look forward to it.

[As she hobbles out, NIGEL ducks under the counter, organizing. Two COPS come in (stout, blonde woman and tall, thin, black, young man).]

NIGEL
[singing] "Rollin'-rollin'-rollin', keep them doggies rollin', keep them doggies rollin', Rawhiiiide. {They'll well, well, weather, and run--}"

OFFICER
Mr. Bates?

[NIGEL stands up and is dumbfounded at who's walked in.]


[Outside, market traders have noticed that the old Bill parked at, and went into, the video shop. SANJAY and WINSTON are in the foreground. They and the others are talking amongst themselves.]

MARK
[comes over] What's goin' on.

WINSTON
We dunno mate.


[In the Vic, PEGGY goes behind the bar, joining TIFFANY.]

PEGGY
[smiling at PUNTER] Oh, mornin', love, what can I get you.

[RICKY is playing a video game or a gambling machine and BIANCA comes in and goes up to him. (She's also looking for someone.)]

BIANCA
What ya?

RICKY
{Hi ya.}

BIANCA
Not workin' then?

RICKY
Huh. Phil tol' me to take an early lunch. He's got a load of calls to make or something. What about you?

BIANCA
Oh, I just finished me drivin' lesson. I was just lookin' for Tiffany. She was meant to be comin' in to see Peggy about something.

RICKY
So, how was it.

BIANCA
What.

RICKY
The drivin' lesson.

BIANCA
Oh, brilliant! Yeah, John was really good. Much better than David.

RICKY
Oh yeah.

BIANCA
Well he don't let nothin' get to him, you know, he's really patient. He said I was his {client}.

RICKY
[resentful, quiet] I bet he did.

BIANCA
What?

RICKY
Well, I'm surprised he managed keep his eyes on the road.

BIANCA
He's not like that, Ricky.

RICKY
[wry, quiet] Oh. Of course not.

BIANCA
[irritated] Well even if he was, what's it got to do with you?

RICKY
Then why tell me about him?

BIANCA
You're jealous. {That's the idea.}

RICKY
Yes. All right? [fed up, goes to a table and sits]

BIANCA
[follows, a little angry] What gives you the right to be jealous about anything I do, anyway? I thought you'd gone with Natalie. [sits by him]

RICKY
Nothing. No, I know it's got nothing to do with me but I still care about you, all right? I can't help it.

BIANCA
Thought we'd agreed to be just friends.

RICKY
We did.

BIANCA
Then what's all this about, then?

RICKY
I dunno.. Just--you know--I, I--like bein' with you, when we're on our own.

BIANCA
Yeah.

RICKY
[resentful] An' now we are, but what about when Tiffany turns up, an' I have to sit here watchin' the pair of you gigglin' with each other.

BIANCA
[impatient] What's Tiffany got to do with anything?

RICKY
[flustered] Well--she's always there, you-- You know I never get a chance to talk to you properly.

BIANCA
[concerned] Well she's not here now.

RICKY
I know.

BIANCA
So, what'd you want to talk about, then?

RICKY
I dunno. Anything.

BIANCA
[patient] Except for my drivin' lesson..

RICKY
[a little amused] Yeah, and Tiffany..

BIANCA
Better buy me a drink, then.

[RICKY immediately goes to the bar. But TIFFANY has come over to PEGGY.]

TIFF
Right. It's all done.

PEGGY
[proud of her] Oh. Find your first customer, then.

TIFF
[to RICKY] All right then. What can I get ya.

RICKY
Uh! What're you doin' here.

TIFF
I work here.

[RICKY sighs, looking tired, back at BIANCA. Just then, GRANT comes downstairs to the bar.]

PEGGY
[to GRANT] Oh. What were you doin' sneakin' about the place?

GRANT
I wasn't sneakin'.

PEGGY
Well, what were you doin' then?

GRANT
I just went upstairs.

PEGGY
What for?

GRANT
I live here.

PEGGY
All right. There's no need to get shirty. I only asked. Anyway: while you've been sneaking in and out, I've been busy.

GRANT
Doin' what.

PEGGY
Takin' on a new barmaid.

GRANT
Who.

PEGGY
[calling] Tiffany!

TIFF
Yep, be right with ya.

GRANT
Oh mum, tell me this is a wind-up.

[TIFFANY comes over.]

PEGGY
I was just tellin' Grant how well you're doin'.

TIFF
Yeah, I've not had too many problems yet.

GRANT
Yeah, well we've only been open ten minutes.

PEGGY
Take no notice, darlin'. He's always grumpy in the mornin'.

TIFF
[slightly suggestive] I'll try an' remember that. [returns to work]

GRANT
[wry] Mum have you taken leave of your senses.

PEGGY
The punters will love her.

GRANT
She doesn't know a pint glass from her elbow.

PEGGY
She'll learn. I had to.

GRANT
She's a kid!

MARK
[just come in] Grant.

GRANT
With you in a minute Mark. I mean, what's she gonna be like when we get mobbed in here, eh?

PEGGY
She'll manage.

MARK
It's Nigel.

GRANT
[serious] Eh?

MARK
Video shop. He's gone home wi' the old Bill.

GRANT
[takes this in a moment]
Cheers Mark. [leaving, urgent business] Uh, Ricky. Where's Phil.

RICKY
Workin' at the Arches.

GRANT
Well, go an' get him, get him to meet me in Turpin Road. Now. [runs out]

[RICKY's senses that it's important, and leaves. GRANT runs to the market and goes to SANJAY and WINSTON. (WINSTON's saying, "Something is so strange, {I don't know--}")]

GRANT
Hey Sanjay, what's goin' on?

SANJAY
They just took him out.

GRANT
Where to?

SANJAY
Well, it looks like they took him back to his gaff..

GRANT
[keeping calm] Did they, uh bring anything else out with him.

SANJAY
Like what.

GRANT
Like old boxes or somethin'.

SANJAY
I didn't see anything, not to mention.

GRANT
{Right, cheers.}

[GRANT sees PHIL and walks over to him. They keep themselves calm.]

PHIL
What's goin' on.

GRANT
Is your gear still in there?

PHIL
Yeah.

GRANT
So how'd the old man know, then?

PHIL
They can't. Where is he?

GRANT
Over at his flat. Wanna go have a look?

PHIL
No, it.. We're better {off later on}.

GRANT
We can't leave him on his own, you know what he's like.

PHIL
Yeah {it's gotta be somethin' important, though} what is it?

GRANT
Ya got me, mate.

PHIL
N--All right, look. Let's find out what the score is first, all right?
You stay here, I'll go 'round there an' say I'm gonna take him out for a beer or something--

GRANT
No no, he takes one look at you, he'll think you're bein' tugged as well--he'll start blabbin'. I better go. [leaves]


[PHIL watches him, stays where he is. GRANT goes up to NIGE's door, sees it's slightly ajar, and quietly lets himself in. He knocks on the flat's door. The female officer (POLICE SERGEANT) answers.]

GRANT
Uh. I've come to see Nigel.

SERGEANT
[quiet] Are you a friend of his.

GRANT
Yeah.

SERGEANT
You better come in.

GRANT
[follows her in, quiet] What's goin' on.

SERGEANT
I'm afraid--

NIGEL
[dumfounded but knows GRANT should hear it from a friend] No. It's Debs.

GRANT
What..

[NIGEL doesn't answer, is in shock, staring at the air. SERGEANT and GRANT step into the hall.]

SERGEANT
[somber, quiet] Mrs. Bates was killed in a road accident at ten thirty this morning.


[In the Vic, RICKY, MARK, and SANJAY are at the bar. PEGGY is behind the bar. SANJAY and MARK are subtly making light of the anxious speculation.]

SANJAY
Must o' been a raid.

RICKY
What for?

MARK
Maybe he's been makin' dirty movies in the back room.

SANJAY
{It'd be a funny thing} if Nigel Bates: porn king of Walford.

PEGGY
[amused, assuring] The boys will sort him out.

MARK
What I don't understand is, why they took him back to his flat.

SANJAY
Probably after his private video collection.

[PHIL comes in.]

RICKY
Phil, what's goin' on?

PHIL
I don't know, is Grant back {or not.}

PEGGY
No..

SANJAY
Has he gone around there then?

PHIL
Yeah.

PEGGY
So, what's he done?

PHIL
Oh. Don't know, that's what, Grant's gone to find out.

RICKY
Mark reckons he's makin' dirty films.

PHIL
[sigh, quiet] Leave it out, mate.

MARK
It was a joke.

PHIL
[resigned] {Okay, well I don't} see anyone laughing.


[At the Bates', SERGEANT is quietly leaving, the POLICEMAN just behind her.]

SERGEANT
[to GRANT] Can I have a word.

GRANT
Yeah, sure.

[GRANT goes with them to the hall.]

SERGEANT
Can you stay with him?

GRANT
Yeah, of course.
Do you know how it happened?

SERGEANT
Only what we were told.. She stepped out in the road, an' someone hit her.. She was "dead on arrival" at the hospital..

GRANT
I only saw her a couple o' hours ago..

SERGEANT
It happens.. Are there any kids..

GRANT
Yeah, a little girl.. She's at school.. Do you think I should go an' pick her up.

SERGEANT
Well it's up to you.. Bu' it might be better to leave her where she is for the minute.. He'll have to come in.. Make a formal identification..

GRANT
Why can't I do it.

SERGEANT
No, I'm sorry. It has to be next of kin.

GRANT
Well can I come with him?

SERGEANT
Yeah.. Yeah, it might be a good idea. Look, why don't you give us a call when you think he's up to it.. As soon as you can, all right?

GRANT
Yeah..

SERGEANT
Shame.. He seems like a nice bloke..

GRANT
[quiet, sad] He is..
[whisper as they quietly leave] Cheers..

[GRANT goes in the living room. NIGEL is just staring, dumbfounded. GRANT's concerned and quiet, sits by him.]

GRANT
Oh, Nige..

NIGEL
I should be cryin' or something, shouldn't I?

GRANT
[pause] Mate, do whatever you think you gotta do, yeah..

NIGEL
I thought they'd come to nick me..

GRANT
Yeah..

NIGEL
I uh.. [pulling out a paper from his pocket]

GRANT
What you doin'..

NIGEL
I gotta pa--I gotta pay the electric bill..

GRANT
[pause] No you don't have to worry about it right now..

NIGEL
I've gotta--I--I haven't paid it yet--

GRANT
Nige. It Doesn't Matter.

NIGEL
We'll get cut off. [full stop, and then a strange bleat comes out of his mouth]

GRANT
Nige.

[NIGEL starts to cry/groan, numbly, in disbelieving grief. GRANT holds him tight.]


[In the Vic, PAULINE comes in. MARK's at the bar. RICKY and WINSTON are in the background nearby.]

PAULINE
Hi..

MARK
You all right, mum?

PAULINE
Well I would be, if your father paid me half the attention he's giving to that campaign of his.

MARK
Uh--still got a bee in his bonnet, has he.

PAULINE
Oh! Possessed, if you ask me.

MARK
Did you, ah.. did you speak to him for me..

PAULINE
Weeell, it took me quite a while to get a word in edgewise, but I think I got through in the end.

MARK
So what did he say?

PAULINE
Nothing much, he was uh, quite reasonable about it.
How's Ruth?

MARK
[nervous] She's fine.

PAULINE
Oh, good.

MARK
Mind you, she's been, working really hard--you know--with the kids an' that. I don't know how she does it. She loves it, though.

PAULINE
She must do. I know it's bad enough with one. Well, two if you count your father.

MARK
You must have had your hands full--o' that? When we were little. Even though it was just two.

PAULINE
Well at times it felt as though you were fourteen.

MARK
You must have enjoyed it--us. An' you did it all over again with Martin, didn't ya?

PAULINE
Yeah.. Glutton for punishment..

MARK
An' you wouldn't change a thing, {then}?

PAULINE
Nah, of course not. Mind you, your life's not your own any more--

ART
[just come up with drinks] There we go--hello son.

MARK
Dad.

ART
Are you in a better mood today?

MARK
Yeah.

ART
Good. Can I get you a drink.

MARK
No thanks, dad, I've already got one.

ART
Right, then. [to PAULINE] Peggy was tellin' me about Nigel.

PAULINE
[quiet] What about him..

ART
Well, he's been arrested or something..

PAULINE
What for..

MARK
Well, nobody knows yet. They're waitin' for Grant to get back.

[The phone's ringing and PEGGY goes and gets it.]

PEGGY
Queen Victoria.
Oh, hello love.. Did you find out anything?
Yeah. He's in the bar.
But Grant--
Oh, okay.. Hang on a minute.

[She puts the receiver down and walks back to behind the bar. (RICKY and BIANCA are having a nice conversation by the bar.)]

PEGGY
Phil, it's Grant.

[PHIL comes around to the phone. PEGGY follows part of the way.]

PEGGY
Didn't want to talk to me.. [leaves him alone]

PHIL
[to phone] Hello?


[Out by the bar, RICKY and BIANCA.]

BIANCA
Well, she didn't say nothing to me about it. Perhaps she'll give us free drinks, though, uh?


[Back in the hall, PHIL has got the news and soberly puts the phone down. He walks behind the bar, quiet, taking on making the announcement as soon as possible. People soon sense something important.]

PHIL
[quiet] Uuum, can everyone, just, listen for a sec, yeah? Just.. I've just had a phone call an' um.. well Debbie Bates was killed in a, a road accident {this morning}..

PEGGY
Nigel's Debbie?

PHIL
Yeah..

[The Vic crowd is silent in shock and sadness. Only the music goes on.]


[NIGEL has his head in a towel--looks like he splashed his face--exhausted, lingers, patting the towel on his face. He's in the kitchen. GRANT comes back in from outside and calls.]

GRANT
Nige?

NIGEL
In here.

GRANT
I, parked the car out front.

NIGEL
Right. [gets up]

GRANT
Look: you don't have to do this now, you know.

NIGEL
Nah, nah. I--I want to.
It sounds funny but, I want to see her..

GRANT
I tell you what, why don't we stop off on the way and uh, get a couple o' brandies inside you..

NIGEL
[disoriented, pauses] Oh, no--no, I'm fine.. fine.. [leaving]

[They leave the kitchen, GRANT shutting the door behind him, which has Debs' cute, big, Tweetie Bird bag hanging on the back of it. Nige's little Stan and Ollie are on the wall nearby, of course.]


[In the Vic, it's all quiet, no music. PEGGY, PHIL, ART, PAULINE, SANJAY, RICKY, BIANCA, and WINSTON are all standing by the bar, subdued.]

PEGGY
Do you think we should do something..

PHIL
Like what..

PEGGY
I dunno.. Send flowers or something..

PAULINE
[respectful, had cried] I don't think you do that.. Not yet..

MARK
Or a card or something..

ART
Or a condolence card..

PHIL
He must be in a right state..

PEGGY
Grant's with him.. He'll let us know what's best..

PAULINE
Y--what about the little girl, she gonna need pickin' up from school..

PEGGY
Grant will sort it all out..

RICKY
I still can't believe it..

PAULINE
Did Grant say what happened exactly?

PHIL
No, only that, there was a road accident.

PEGGY
[pause] She doesn't drive though, does she..

ART
Well, she must've been hit by a car, then..

PAULINE
They'd only been married a year..

[Everyone's quiet.]


[In an institutional, sparse waiting room, GRANT and NIGEL are sitting alone, silent. A guy in a lab coat comes in (mortuary ATTENDANT).]

ATTENDANT
Mr. Bates?
If you'd like to follow me..

GRANT
Can I come with him..

ATTENDANT
Of course.

[They follow into the adjoining room. The POLICE SERGEANT is there. The ATTENDANT takes NIGEL, with GRANT behind, to a curtain. After a pause and mutual nod that NIGEL's ready, the ATTENDANT opens the curtain. NIGEL immediately has a gag reflex at the sight--it's too much.]

SERGEANT
Is this your wife, Mr. Bates?

[NIGEL rushes back to the waiting room to the garbage can--the gag reflex wasn't a passing one.. GRANT follows and stops, giving him space.]


[In the Vic, MARK and RUTH are at a small table by themselves, quiet, in sad shock/grief.]

RUTH
It's awful..

MARK
Yeah..

RUTH
An' Nigel, he, he must be devastated..

MARK
Made me think. I mean, if you're offered odds on me an' Debbie..

RUTH
I know what you're gonna say, but you shouldn't think like that..

MARK
No.. That's exactly how I should think.. The truth is, I'm.. I'm no worse off than anyone else in this pub. None of us are immortal.
But that doesn't stop other people gettin' on with their lives.

RUTH
No.

MARK
An' sometimes, you can be so, Busy lookin' over your shoulder, that you don't see what's goin' on in front o' you.

RUTH
So no more lookin' over your should o'..

MARK
No..
[breathing in] Gran used to say to me that when we were born.. There was a date stamped on our forehead.. You couldn't see it, but.. that would be the day that we'd die.
The only difference is I've got a reasonable idea of what mine says.. Debbie didn't.. Who's the worse off?


[GRANT and NIGEL are in Grant's car, parked. NIGEL opens the electric window for some air. He's nearly knocked out by it all. GRANT's in the driver's seat.]

GRANT
You all right now..

NIGEL
She was so pretty..

GRANT
Yeah..

NIGEL
You know.. before I met her.. when I was on me own--you know.. I didn't like my life very much.. "Fat Nige." "Always good for a laugh." But.. no one knew who I was.. Not really.. An' then Debbie came.. an' Clare..

GRANT
[pause] It's quarter to.
Clare..

NIGEL
Yeah..

GRANT
You up to that..

NIGEL
Yeah..

[GRANT starts the car.]


[TIFFANY is collecting glasses in the Vic. PEGGY's sitting at the bar. PHIL's behind it, leaning on it. The pub is closed at the moment. They all are subdued, quiet.]

TIFFANY
So.. How did I do then.

PEGGY
You did fine, love. Mind you, it wasn't the best day for you to start, was it.

TIFFANY
No. Nobody was very happy, were they..

PEGGY
Noo.. An' it'll get worse before it gets better, an' all.
[to PHIL] You're not going back to work?

PHIL
Oh, I think {I'll hang around here} for Grant..

PEGGY
Think he'll bring him back here?

PHIL
Nnn--I dunno.

PEGGY
What will happen to little Clare now..


[GRANT and NIGEL have parked outside the school and it's letting out--KIDS going off in various directions, other cars waiting. CLARE is walking and talking with another GIRL (ABBEY).]

NIGEL
What am I gonna tell her?
[calling] Clare! Clare!

[CLARE spots NIGEL. She and ABBEY continue talking as they head for the car.]

NIGEL
I don't wanna go back to the flat, not straight away.

GRANT
What ever you want..

CLARE
Where's mum?

NIGEL
[tries to seem casual] Uh, what's up, I'm--aren't I good enough for you now.

CLARE
O' course you are! Um, can Abbey come back for tea?

NIGEL
Not tonight, darlin'--

CLARE
Oh please.

NIGEL
Uh, another night, eh?

CLARE
[to ABBEY] Okay, sorry, see you tomorrow.

ABBEY
Thanks. Bye.

CLARE
Bye.

(ABBEY had been peering at NIGEL with a sort of judgmental look.)


[GRANT is parking the car in a public park. NIGEL and CLARE come out of the car. She's somewhat aware that something's up. He's holding her hand and carrying an umbrella.]

CLARE
Aren't we going home?

NIGEL
Not yet, no.

CLARE
[brightening] Can I go an' play on the swings?

NIGEL
Later maybe, yeah.


[GRANT watches respectfully from the driver's seat. NIGEL and CLARE go sit on a bench by the path and NIGEL, very soon, says something serious to her and she listens. Kids are playing on swings and a gym set behind them. She's leaning forward to him, listening intently. After a few seconds, she collapses into a sad, disbelieving, gentle hug with him.]

(No boom-boom ending. Soft music under the scene segues into the EastEnders theme for the credits.)

[show's time: 27:00]
[Credit Roll with theme music. Long version of exit theme: Save music (1mb mp3).]
[time: 00:30; total with intro and credits: 27:57]
Transcript of the next episode (the next Monday)
Return to the Television Transcript Project

Last Updated: 5 Feb 2000

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