The bridge underneath Batman’s feet continued to disappear. Some time ago, Batman had rescued Robin from a similar predicament by cutting through the steel bars of a window and throwing him a rope. This room, however, had no windows and his ‘old chum’ wasn‘t around to return the favour.
The Caped Crusader braced himself against the wall and briefly halted the bridge’s retraction. Batman knew he couldn’t keep that up for more than a few minutes, so while he pushed with his legs, he extracted an item from his utility belt.
King Tut’s cellphone chimed an ancient-Egyptian-sounding tune. “Yes, High Priestess?” he asked, glancing at the Caller I.D..
“Batman’s alive,” she reported.
“Yes, I know, but he will be for only a few more minutes. I led him into the crocodile room. He had company, though. I found three sets of female boot prints entering the pyramid.”
Catwoman, who was seated beside Tut, heard the High Priestess’s report. “Curses! Those pesky bats have somehow cheated death yet again! No matter. We can dispose of them here. Can you delay them while I get ready?”
Tut looked at a map of the pyramid. “Leave your underlings with me and I’ll stall them in the outer burial chamber,” he said.
Eenie and Catarina had been converting an area in the pyramid into a temporary cat-lair. Eenie approached Catwoman and spoke quietly into her mistress’s ear. “Boss, I was thinking. Any proceeds from this caper would be better divided between two.” Eenie glanced at Catarina.
“I couldn’t have put it better myself. I no longer require Catarina, but Lieutenant Mooney may still be of use. When I return, be ready to ambush Catarina.”
Catwoman retired to an antechamber and dipped her claws in a substance that would counteract the Cataphrenic. She then emerged and moved towards Catarina.
The Feline Fiend scratched the former good girl. “What are you doing, boss…. Catwoman! You vile villainess!” Eenie seized the Lieutenant by the arms and held her firmly. The Princess of Plunder broke a knockout gas capsule and held it under the officer’s nose until she passed out.
Catwoman hoisted the unconscious policewoman’s body over her shoulder. “I must do this alone,” she said to Eenie, “so, for now, go with King Tut.”
“Can we trust him?” Eenie inquired.
“Yes . . . at least until the bats are dead.” Catwoman left to prepare a deadly reception.
Ten minutes later, the High Priestess opened the door to the crocodile trap and looked inside. Batman appeared to her left and sprayed Bat-sleep into her face.
The Dark Knight swung through the door and let go of the Bat-Hook onto which he had been holding since the bridge had vanished, the High Priestess passed out at his feet. He stowed the Bat-Hook in his utility belt and Bat-cuffed the High Priestess, before venturing deeper into the pyramid.
Elsewhere inside the tomb, the svelte forms of Batgirl, Batwoman and Flamebird made steady progress. After an hour of negotiating the monument’s maze-like interior, they heard familiar voices.
The Gynecic Trio followed the voices to a large room. Tut was giving instructions to Eenie. “Follow me into the inner chamber!” he ordered in his usual flamboyant style.
Batgirl stepped forward. “You’re not going anywhere.”
“Get her!” Tut yelled.
Eenie charged at Batgirl, but the Distaff Duo stepped forward at the last minute and landed punishing blows to the bad girl’s mid-section, literally beating her to the punch. A trademark chorus-line kick sent Eenie into velvety oblivion.
While his adversaries’ attention was focused on Eenie, Tut pressed a button on the wall. The three crimefighters didn’t hear a panel opening behind them. As the triumphant trio walked forward and put their hands on their hips in front of the faux pharaoh, Queen Shirley, Nefertiti and Cleo Patrick emerged, each with a vase in hand.
“You know,” Tut began as his royal handmaidens crept towards their unsuspecting prey, “with the amount of treasure inside this pyramid’s inner chamber, we could all be rich forever. I could use women of your considerable talents at my side. What do you say?”
“Bribing a duly-deputized officer of the law is a felony,” Batwoman answered.
“We aren’t interested in anything except seeing justice done,” Flamebird added.
“You can consider your criminal career ka-put!” Batgirl concluded.
Tut hadn’t expected they would accept his offer. He was just distracting them until his entourage was within striking distance.
‘One more exchange ought to do it,’ he thought. “Well,” he said, “it’s time to say goodbye.”
“You’re not going anywhere!” the female bats said in unison.
The handmaidens took their final step forwards. “No, but you are . . .” he replied menacingly.
The handmaidens lowered the boom and the three vases shattered on the heads of their victims, who promptly slumped to the ground, unconscious. “. . . off to dreamland,” Tut gloated over their unconscious forms.
His handmaidens revived Eenie and they bound the Distaff Duo. They moved to do the same to Batgirl, but Tut stopped them.
“Leave her, my lovelies, and bring the two newest bats.”
“But Your Majesty,” Eenie protested. “We have Batgirl at our mercy. We should finish her off, too.”
“Catwoman and Batgirl have quite a history. Catwoman expressed her desire to purr-sonally see to Batgirl’s fate.”
When the Distaff Duo regained consciousness, they quickly realized they were in harm’s way yet again. The two beauties had been expertly hogtied. They had also been gagged and suspended in a rope net.
Nefertiti alerted her monarch to the fact that Batwoman and Flamebird were awake. King Tut strolled over to within talking distance.
“Did you have a pleasant nap, Bat-Broads?” he mocked. “I hope so, because now I have the unpleasant task of disposing of you.”
The room they were in was very dark and neither Batwoman nor Flamebird could see the ground below. “Lights!” Tut commanded and the four female felons each lit a torch and placed them into holders on the wall. The light revealed the full extent of their predicament.
The Distaff Duo was suspended fifteen feet above a pit full of snakes. They could now see the rope net had been secured by a single strand, attached to an eye hook in the ceiling. The rope then angled back down to the ground.
King Tut placed a large candle under the rope and lit it. “In a few moments, this candle will burn through the rope holding you aloft, causing you to fall into the snake pit.
Then you will be well and truly snake bit . . . and you’ll find their deadly venom works very fast indeed.”
“Yeah, and so does their poison!" Queen Shirley said, chuckling.
The Monarch rolled his eyes in disbelief. “Momma warned me about college drop-outs,” he muttered.
“Come!” he said to his underlings and Eenie. “There is much work to be done.” They departed, leaving Batwoman and Flamebird to their fate.
Batgirl revived and rubbed her aching head. She was alone, and unrestrained – which was quite a rarity for her upon regaining consciousness.
Looking around the room, she spied the secret panel from which the ambush had been sprung. There was a passageway behind the panel. All of the other exits had been sealed, so the Purple Paragon had no choice but to follow the passage.
After fifty feet the passage ended in a small room with two doors. A familiar voice came from a speaker. “Behind one of those doors is certain death. Behind the other is your good friend, Lieutenant Mooney.”
“Catwoman,” Batgirl said.
Knowing that, under the circumstances, engaging the villainess in banter would be a waste of time, Batgirl opened the door on the left. She entered cautiously and found herself in another passageway.
Her tormentor was standing in a doorway at the far end of the passage. Halfway down the passage, Batgirl stepped on a pressure plate.
Only her lightning-fast reflexes saved the heroine from a giant pendulum blade that swooshed within an inch of her torso!
“You’ve failed yet again, Catwoman!” she yelled triumphantly.
“Drat and double drat!” Catwoman cursed before fleeing into the next room. Batgirl raced after her.
Catwoman was just exiting this next room as Batgirl entered. The Dominoed Daredoll was halfway across the space when glass doors slid down over the entrance and the exit, trapping Batgirl inside.
Catwoman stood outside the glass, smiling like a Cheshire cat. “The door you chose was certain death, but I couldn’t resist one last game of cat and mouse.”
Batgirl strained, but couldn’t budge her glass prison. “The glass is soundproof, bulletproof and Bat-proof. You’re not going anywhere,” Catwoman stated into a microphone.
“Gloat while you can, Catwoman, but once I’m free, I’m bringing you in!” Batgirl said determinedly.
“You bore me, Batgirl, so I’m ending your career – and your life – right here and now!”
The Princess of Plunder pressed a button. A cloud of gray gas, issued from a concealed nozzle in the ceiling, engulfed Batgirl. Despite inhaling some of the fumes, Batgirl appeared to be totally unaffected.
“Your drugs are losing their potency!” Batgirl proclaimed.
“That wasn’t a drug. It was a pheromone given off by the Egyptian wolf spider.”
Catwoman grabbed a glass jar and held it up for Batgirl to see. “Do you know what is in this jar?” she asked.
“It looks like some kind of wasp,” Batgirl replied.
“It’s an Egyptian Pepsis wasp, to be precise. When the wasp is ready to lay her egg, she hunts down and paralyzes an Egyptian wolf spider with a single sting. She then buries the spider under the desert sand and lays an egg beneath the spider’s exoskeleton.
“The wasp’s larva then eats its paralyzed host alive! The larva eats the spider’s non-vital organs first, so the spider doesn’t die for several days.”
Catwoman’s eyes glinted evilly. “This wasp will paralyze you for her offspring instead!”
“That’s monstrous!” Batgirl declared, “however, your plan won’t work. Firstly, I don’t look anything like a spider, and secondly, that wasp is way too small to paralyze me.”
“Smell is far more important to wasps than sight,” Catwoman retorted, “and since you smell like a spider, it will think that’s exactly what you are.”
“As for its size . . . .” Catwoman hit another button and a third glass door descended, four feet in front of the exit. She raised the glass door covering the exit and released the wasp. She then lowered the glass door back over the exit.
Catwoman retrieved a small rod from inside one of her sleeves. Batgirl gasped as she recognized the device. It was the same device Catwoman had used to enlarge her cat, Hecate, before setting him against Batgirl!
Catwoman’s claws cut a small hole in the glass. Then she pointed the device at the wasp. The two inch wasp was transformed into a four foot wasp before Batgirl’s very eyes!
“Now it’s big enough to paralyze you!” Catwoman crowed.
“I’m not a spider,” Batgirl pointed out. “The venom still might not paralyze me.”
“The same thought occurred to me, too, my soon-to-be-deceased winged rodent. So I tested it on the treacherous Lieutenant Mooney just a few minutes ago! It paralyzed her and will do the same to you!” She raised the glass door separating Batgirl and the wasp.
The enlarged insect circled the Dark Knight Damsel, looking for an opening. Batgirl had no plans of becoming a living larder for the wasp’s larva. She extracted a can of Bat-sleep and sprayed the creature right in the face.
The wasp hesitated, but remained airborne. Batgirl looked in her utility belt for something with which to free herself from the room.
Then the wasp suddenly lunged. Batgirl saw it out of the corner of her eye, but was caught flat-footed. As she stepped aside, she felt the wasp’s stinger pierce her shapely thigh!
A look of horror crossed her face as she realized what had happened. She took a Bat-antidote pill out of her utility belt, but her hand never made it to her mouth.
Her entire body began spasming and she collapsed to the floor. After fifteen seconds the spasms stopped – along with all other movement, except her breathing. Batgirl was completely paralyzed and utterly helpless.
“Purr-fect,” Catwoman purred. “Bye-bye forever, Batgirl,” she said, blowing her nemesis a kiss before raising all the glass doors and leaving.
IS THE DISTAFF DUO TO BECOME SNAKE FODDER?
ARE BATGIRL AND LIEUTENANT MOONEY GOING TO SUCCUMB TO A FATE WORSE THAN DEATH?
WILL THEY BE EATEN ALIVE BY GIANT WASP LARVA?!?!?
DON’T GO ANYWHERE!
BECAUSE WE WILL FIND OUT . . .
RIGHT NOW!
That caused the net to swing. After a few minutes, the rope had burned halfway through. Batwoman did, though, finally managed to work her gag free.
“Flamebird, to get out of this, we are going to have to try to swing ourselves over the edge of the pit at the exact instant the rope burns through!”
Flamebird nodded her understanding. The rope kept burning.
When Batwoman felt it weaken, she yelled, “Okay! Swing from right to left and back again, as hard as you can!”
They swung out over the lip of the pit twice, before the rope broke. It gave way just as they were swinging back towards the abyss.
They landed heavily, just two inches away from the lip of the pit. They were winded, but alive.
Seconds later, Batman Bat-jogged into view and cut them free.
They went through the door Tut and his minions had used and ended up in a dimly-lit passage. Flamebird went to the front, eager to apprehend the criminals.
At the end of the passage, there were three doors. The crimefighters decided to split up. Batwoman took the left door, Batman the right and Flamebird the centre.
After a few minutes, Flamebird entered a large room. She was about to leave, when she glimpsed something purple through a door on the other side of the room.
Flamebird raced over and saw a four foot wasp dragging Batgirl’s motionless body across the floor! “Batgirl!” she cried. “Are you okay?”
Batgirl heard Flamebird, but was unable to respond. Flamebird followed the wasp, which she recognized from her studies as an Egyptian Pepsis wasp.
The over-sized insect dragged the hapless crimefighter out of the pyramid, then 500 yards into the desert before stopping. Then it started digging. Flamebird was familiar with the wasp’s reproductive strategy, so she knew what was happening. The Girl Wonder took a Bat-antidote pill and slipped a second one into Batgirl’s mouth.
The wasp finished digging and climbed out of the hole. It wasn’t happy to see something standing between it and its prey, so it attacked.
Flamebird saw the wasp coming and nimbly avoided the first lunge. The unusual foes then circled one another. The giant flying bug looked for an opening, but found her target very hard to pin down.
Flamebird was not accustomed to fighting on the loose desert sand. After a couple of minutes, she lost her footing. The wasp was on her in a second, but before it could sting her, it shrieked and disappeared in a puff.
Still lying on the ground, Batgirl put her laser compact back in her utility belt. The two crimefighters stood up. “Thanks, Flamebird, that was a close one. I didn’t know wasps are immune to Bat-sleep.”
“Actually, all insects are,” Flamebird explained. “Anaesthetics work by decreasing the amount of oxygen we can absorb in our blood. Humans absorb oxygen via haemoglobin, whereas insects absorb oxygen via haemocyanin, so they are unaffected by human anaesthetic.”
Batgirl was torn between being impressed by Flamebird and wondering if the young woman knew what she was talking about!
Flamebird went on, “Batman and Batwoman are still inside. Let’s go!”
“Wait!” Batgirl said, “Catwoman used another wasp on Lieutenant Mooney. We need to find her immediately!”
“I’ll get the Bat-Gyro. An aerial search will be much quicker and the on-board sensors can sense body heat.”
“I’ll see if I can pick up any tracks back at the pyramid’s entrance,” Batgirl replied.
Batgirl dashed to the tunnel entrance. She found another set of drag marks, but the shifting sands had already started to cover them. After a few hundred feet, she lost the trail.
Just then, Flamebird landed in the Bat-Gyro.
“Can that thing hold the both of us?” Batgirl asked.
“Sure, but it will be a tight fit.”
Batgirl climbed in. “The other wasp was heading this way,” she pointed. “Let’s search there first.”
Flamebird guided the mini-helicopter in the indicated direction. In a couple of minutes, the sensors revealed a hidden source of body heat underneath the surface.
They landed and started digging. It took them several minutes to uncover Lieutenant Mooney. A small hole in the policewoman.’s abdomen revealed where the wasp had laid its egg.
Batgirl gave Diana a Bat-antidote pill. Meantime, Flamebird removed a can of compressed air from her utility belt and sprayed it directly over the egg hole.
“Wasps are used to hot environments. This cold compressed air will force the larva into a catatonic state until we can get you to a medical facility,” she explained.
Back inside the pyramid, Catwoman, King Tut, and their underlings stood before the doorway to the inner vault. The faux pharaoh placed the Orb of Osiris in an indentation on the left side of the door. Catwoman placed the Idol of Isis into a slot on the right.
The door clicked and slowly retracted into the ceiling. “We will need several sacks for the treasure within,” Tut said to Catwoman. “Our underlings can see to that, while we inspect our ill-gotten gains!” The greedy Feline Felon raced ahead. As she entered the inner vault, Tut gave his underlings a pre-arranged signal. Queen Shirley and Nefertiti removed a yellowish powder from their outfits and blew it into Eenie’s face. The stunned crook instantly collapsed.
“Admit no one save the High Priestess,” he whispered before hurrying after his intended bride.
The Princess of Plunder looked over the moon as she picked up Bastet’s belt and put it around her sexy waist. She playfully strutted up and down the vault, swishing her heavenly hips from side to side.
“Oh, it’s magnificent!” she cried.
“I’ll say!” echoed the rotund ruler, who was greedily devouring Catwoman’s performance.
As the royal handmaidens were securing Eenie, Batman and Batwoman ran into the room and surprised them. Batwoman sprayed them with Bat-sleep and they slumped to the floor. As she Bat-cuffed their hands together, Batman entered the vault.
Catwoman continued displaying her assets for another minute. “You know . . . you’re actually quite handsome,” she complimented King Tut.
‘Oh, how exquisite!’ he thought. ‘The belt is working! Now, for the coup de grace.’
The ruler of the Upper and Lower Nile removed one of Aunt Hilda’s extra-strength love dart from his royal raiments and threw it at Catwoman.
“Watch out, Catwoman!” Batman yelled as he dived and pushed her out of harm’s way. Unfortunately, the blonde woman struck her head as they fell.
“Curse you!!” Tut ranted. He kicked the wall in fury.
A loose stone fell from the ceiling, directly onto the monarch’s cranium. He was out before he hit the floor.
“Batman!” Batwoman yelled as she ran in. She saw both Tut and Catwoman were unconscious. “Lieutenant Mooney needs urgent medical attention. I’ll leave you and Batgirl to tidy up, while Flamebird and I fly her to the nearest hospital.”
Batgirl arrived a moment later and revived Tut. “Where am I?” he asked.
Then he saw Batgirl, Batman and Catwoman. “Did it happen again?” he asked sheepishly.
“I’m afraid so,” Batgirl said. “Come with me, Professor. We’ll get you checked out by a doctor. Then you can go back to Gotham State University.”
Batman picked up Catwoman in his arms and walked out of the vault. He didn’t notice the dart snagged on his cape.
Catwoman awoke with a sigh. She snuggled even closer, resting her face against the Caped Crusader’s chest. “Purr-fect” she mewed.
“Just take it easy, Catwoman. You’ve had a bit of a fall,” he said.
Catwoman sheathed her claws and stroked Batman’s face and chest “I’m okay,” she said. “You can put me down now.”
Catwoman was feeling strange. “What would it take to get a man like you?” she asked.
“Well, you’d have to give up crime and pay your debt to society.”
“Okay,” she heard herself say, but it sounded as if someone else was speaking.
“Warden Crichton can see to your rehabilitation. After that, a woman of your beauty and intelligence should be able make an outstanding contribution to society.”
“So, you’ll go out with me, then?” she pleaded.
“What about Robin?” the Caped Crusader asked.
“Well, he isn’t as youthful as he once was. Isn’t it about time he struck out on his own?”
“Perhaps,” Batman admitted. He looked into his longtime adversary’s eyes. “I want to believe you, but how do I know this isn’t another one of your tricks?”
Catwoman removed the Bat-cuffs from Batman’s utility belt and snapped them around her own wrists.
“See?” she pouted. “Now I’m helpless.”
“There are many words I could use to describe you, Catwoman, but helpless isn’t one of them.”
With her cuffed hands, Catwoman gently pushed Batman against the wall of the pyramid. In doing so, the dart in Batman’s cape pierced his back.
“Oh, Catwoman! You are so very beautiful!” Batman declared.
Catwoman kissed him on the lips. “Let me show you just how happy I could make you.”
Outside, Batgirl and Professor Mackelroy were standing by idly. They had discovered having the portly professor ride on the back of the Batgirlcycle wasn't practical.
While they waited, Batgirl reflected on the outcome of the past few days. Eenie, Queen Shirley, Nefertiti and Cleo Patrick were all bound, ready to be collected by the Arizona Department of Public Safety. Unfortunately, the mysterious High Priestress had revived and slipped the Bat-Cuffs. She was nowhere to be found.
Still, a large number of criminals had been taken off the streets. Also, Flamebird had reported over the radio that Lieutenant Mooney was responding well to treatment. All in all, Batgirl was pleased with her efforts.
Mackelroy interrupted Batgirl’s musings. The academician had removed his royal headdress and fake beard.
"They're taking an awfully long time in there."
Batgirl was about to respond, when the Dark Knight and Catwoman emerged from the tunnel entrance. Batgirl was shocked by what she saw.
“Batman! Are you . . . blushing?!?” Batgirl asked.
Batman looked uncomfortably at Batgirl and the professor. Then he smiled and gave Catwoman a knowing look. “We are in a desert, Batgirl,” the Caped Crusader replied, “and I did have to carry Catwoman most of the way out.”