[My adaptation of the RL monologue...see, I can be funny in a writer
emergency!]
K: Okay, I am a HUGE fan of the West Wing, and I've gotta say Sam is
my absolute favourite.
RL: Thank you.
K: I'm gonna marry Sam as soon as I'm outta high school.
RL: Really. You do realize he's a fictional character?
K: I can work with that. He and Mallory aren't a thing, are they?
RL: Not really...
K: Good. 'Cause she's cool too, but I'd take her out if she was
going to stand in the way of me becoming Mrs. Sam Seaborn.
RL: Right. Um...someone from security? Could you get Allison Smith
on the phone and tell her she might want to start fearing for her
life now?