Lesson Number One
A crow was sitting
on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow,
and asked him,
"Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"
The crow answered: "Sure, why not."
So, the
rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story:
To be sitting
and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high
up.
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Lesson Number Two
A turkey was
chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top
of
that tree,"
sighed the turkey,"but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.
"They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey
pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him
enough
strength
to reach the first branch of the tree. The
next day, after eating
some more dung,
he reached the second branch.
Finally after
a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
Soon he
was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the
tree.
Moral of the story:
Bullshit might
get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
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Lesson Number
Three
A little bird
was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and
fell to the
ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came
by and
dropped some
dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile
of cow dung,
it began to
realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him
out! He lay
there all warm
and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing
cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following
the
sound,
the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung,
and promptly dug
him out and
ate him!
Morals of the story:
1)
Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.
2)
Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3)
When you're in deep shit, keep your mouth shut.